Chapter 48: Sexual Desire Expression – 3

Vivian left her room and wandered through the halls of Rondor Castle.

Listening to the pouring rain, she calmed her tangled thoughts.

Perhaps because it was night, she felt a bit lonely, a bit sentimental.

She had gone for a little walk to forget someone, yet that very person only came to mind even more.

“…?”

As she passed through the castle, Vivian noticed something.

Looking down at the training grounds through the window, she saw something unusual.

Squinting, she focused, realizing that two small figures were standing in the rain on the training ground.

One seemed to be practicing with a sword, while the other was watching.

A boy soldier and a maid, perhaps?

For a moment, Vivian thought about it.

***

Standing there, watching them, she found it amusing how people busily paired up.

Training together in the rain at night, encouraging each other—she found it quite strange.

She remembered someone saying that love was an incomprehensible and inefficient act.

Now, seeing this, she could begin to understand what they meant.

As she was about to turn and leave, a strange sensation made Vivian stop.

There was something about the boy soldier’s posture, his movements—something familiar.

That uncanny feeling prevented her from moving, compelling her to observe more intently.

“…Huh?”

The longer she watched, the more her heart raced, her face gradually tensing with distrust, her head tilting in suspicion.

But there was no way she could be mistaken.

“…Kailo…?”

She whispered.

Doubt turned to obsession, and obsession turned to certainty.

It was Kailo.

Though obscured by heavy rain and darkness, she could gradually make out his black hair.

Before she realized it, Vivian was leaving the castle.

Barefoot, in thin nightclothes.

She stepped outside as though she were merely heading to bed.

***

Even under the pouring rain that fell like a waterfall, she was unaffected.

It was the first time in her fifteen years that she had ever walked out into such a downpour without hesitation.

Yet the icy rain didn’t faze her.

Even her aching feet went unnoticed.

No matter the obstacles in her way, the intense flames that had ignited within her chest did not fade.

As she walked, she thought.

Perhaps it was arrogant, but she was certain.

…Kailo had no one but her.

Just as she had only him to truly rely on, he too would have no one but her to lean on.

Though they were enemies, they shared many similarities and were deeply intertwined, understanding each other’s hearts better than anyone.

Without words, hadn’t they been the closest to one another?

Hadn’t Kailo also held enough feeling to protect her with his life?

Whether it was guilt or a sense of debt…

Didn’t Kailo hold some positive emotions for her?

She was…

…She was…

…She was his most cherished person.

Vivian arrived at the training ground, noticing the maid beside Kailo.

…And who was that?

Could it be Serena?

If it was indeed Serena, despite her warnings, then this was Serena’s chance to experience Vivian’s wrath.

Determined to identify her, Vivian moved forward.

Even though her feet were muddied, she didn’t stop.

“…Hah.”

A savage smile slowly appeared on Vivian’s face.

The person next to Kailo wasn’t a maid.

It was Lani Dubois.

She had restrained him to avoid running into them, but here they were, meeting as if to mock her restraint.

At this secluded hour when emotions tend to run deeper.

Vivian let out a mirthless chuckle in disbelief.

If it was going to end like this, why had she held back all this time?

The solitary hours spent holding back seemed utterly foolish.

Besides, judging from the atmosphere between Lani and Kailo, this had clearly been going on for more than a day or two.

Lani was laughing joyfully, circling Kailo like a bird.

Vivian once admired Lani’s lively personality, but now it only irritated her.

Observing their behavior, Vivian took steady steps forward.

Her hair clung to her shoulders, and the rain blurred her vision, but she walked straight ahead.

Lani continued to tease Kailo, even going as far as to rest her hand on his chest.

For the first time, Vivian felt the urge to sever someone’s hand.

Kailo was her property.

One of her few belongings.

She couldn’t forgive someone for handling him as they pleased.

Vivian took in the sight of Kailo’s rain-soaked, clinging clothes.

His muscular physique was clearly outlined.

Whether it was anger or some other feeling, her heart pounded harder.

When had his body grown so big, so… frustratingly attractive?

A strange sensation whirled inside her.

Perhaps due to the mix of anger and violent impulses, she even felt an urge to bite Kailo’s neck.

One thing was certain among all these questions: that she found Lani’s hands, touching Kailo without reservation, unbearably irritating.

Hands she might not even dare to place herself, Lani touched without hesitation.

As Vivian’s anger grew, so did her pace.

-Slap!

At that moment, Kailo grabbed Lani’s shoulder.

Then he spoke to her in a serious tone.

The expression he directed at Lani was one Vivian had never seen before.

A blend of worry and tenderness.

Vivian felt her heart constrict.

As anger, frustration, and resentment exploded within her mind, she wondered if he was genuinely happy to have this chance with Lani.

The night, soaked bodies, and the sensual atmosphere all heightened the mood between them.

It grated on her so much that Vivian decided to disrupt Kailo’s happiness.

“Kailo.”

They were so engrossed in their little world that they hadn’t even noticed her approach.

Only when she raised her voice did they flinch like children caught misbehaving.

The fact that they were so focused on each other enraged Vivian.

…Enough that she wanted to rip Lani from Kailo’s dark eyes.

“…What… exactly are you doing here?”

Vivian stuttered, as she had before, but had no intention of correcting herself.

Even processing these overwhelming, incomprehensible emotions was a challenge.

It had only been five days.

Meeting him like this after five days felt unsatisfying.

For the first time, she saw Kailo visibly flustered.

She didn’t like how this usually composed person was flustered because of Lani.

Vivian’s anger grew like the flames that once consumed Rondor Castle.

After a long hesitation, Kailo finally asked.

“Why are you here?”

“And what about you?”

When he still couldn’t answer, Vivian turned her attention to Lani.

“What are you doing here?”

Lani instinctively shrank back in fear, hiding slightly behind Kailo, gripping the hem of his clothes, trembling.

She looked as if Kailo was her knight.

Grinding her teeth, Vivian commanded.

“Kailo, come here.”

“What?”

Vivian felt her patience running dry.

Her tone grew rougher.

“If I have to ask twice… I’ll gouge your eyes out.”

An unknown violent side of her slipped out.

Kailo stiffened, but then he slowly walked toward Vivian.

Lani was left standing there, frozen and uncertain.

Kailo approached and placed his hands on Vivian’s shoulders without hesitation.

His warmth brought her slightly back to her senses.

Kailo spoke.

“…What are you wearing?”

“Right now… is that really what you have to say?”

“Take a look at yourself and say that again.”

For the first time, Vivian looked down at her own clothes.

Her thin nightgown was soaked, clinging to her body.

Her recently fuller chest and wider hips were fully revealed.

Her navel, toned abs, and slim waist were all visible.

The pale, soft pink skin hinted at its texture in places.

Only then did Vivian realize how sensual her body could look.

She looked back up at Kailo’s face, which was filled with turmoil.

She could sense that he was trying his hardest not to look at her.

But at the same time, something stirred inside Vivian that she’d never imagined would cross her mind.

…Oddly enough, she felt it would be a relief if he would just look.

Though she found desire repulsive and revolting, strangely enough, she felt ready to accept that filth right now.

It annoyed her even more that he looked at Lani with those eyes.

Why, she wondered?

And the answer was clear.

Lani might accept Kailo.

She might satisfy his urges.

But not her.

If he dared to direct his desire toward her, she could leave him with a frustration that would never go away.

That’s why, Vivian decided.

But this line of thought didn’t last long.

The anger she felt toward him and Lani kept snapping her back.

The idea of the two of them, out in the rain at night, creating memories together, irritated her endlessly.

It was clear that this would be a memory they’d hold onto for life.

“Is that what’s important…?”

Vivian asked Kailo as water dripped down her face.

“Right now… who do you think has the right to be acting this way?”

“…Vivi—”

“Did you come to this world just to be happy?”

Vivian looked him up and down, her voice dropping to a whisper.

“…Why? Is it because you’ve grown up and now your desire is boiling over? Do you need an outlet?”

Kailo’s face hardened as she threw insult after insult at him.

Steam rose from his body, and to Vivian’s eyes, it looked strangely sensual.

After a long silence, Kailo finally spoke, his voice strained.

“It wasn’t like that.”

“Not like that, you say?”

“…Desire… it wasn’t about that.”

Vivian scoffed.

She glanced at Lani, then back at Kailo, her tone cold.

“Lie to me one more time. Was it really not like that?”

Vivian could believe Kailo when he denied it.

But Lani was different.

She was the one who constantly circled around him like a bird, reaching out to touch him.

Anyone, even a child who knew nothing about desire, could sense the tension in the air.

Even if Kailo wasn’t interested, Lani clearly was.

And the fact that he hadn’t pushed her away was a fault of his, too.

“The two of you sneaking out at night, soaking wet, clinging to each other with longing… How could that possibly be nothing?”

“…Vivian.”

Smack.

Vivian placed her hand on Kailo’s cheek, warning him as she spoke once more.

“Say it again, Kailo Alan. Lie to me.”

They knew each other better than anyone.

Even if they didn’t want to, they could see through each other’s lies.

Kailo frowned but couldn’t answer.

Knowing that Lani had done something wrong, Kailo wouldn’t defend himself.

Nor would he say it was all Lani’s fault.

Vivian felt a strange, stifling ache rise in her chest.

She was glad for the rain.

If there were any inexplicable tears in her eyes, at least she could hide them.

But she had no intention of crying.

She would never let Kailo think he’d won.

Vivian declared,

“Please… Kailo. Get it together. Do I have to say it out loud? Don’t even think about living an ordinary life here. I’m the one who manages your happiness, don’t you understand?”

At that moment, Lani Dubois must have gathered her courage, as she stepped forward toward Vivian.

“Vi… Vivian, this is all my fa—”

Slap!

The moment Lani approached, Vivian slapped her without hesitation.

The memory of Lani placing her hand on Kailo’s chest was still vivid.

Thud!

Kailo quickly grabbed Vivian’s wrist in reaction, his face filled with stern anger.

His look was a clear warning not to go any further.

Vivian didn’t fear his warning.

Instead… she felt hurt.

Almost as if she wanted to throw a tantrum, she felt wounded.

She channeled that feeling into a fierce expression and spoke.

“In front of me…”

She pulled her arm closer, bringing Kailo’s face nearer.

Looking into his eyes, she let a hint of jealousy slip.

“Don’t protect another woman in front of me.”