Chapter 45 : The Terrifying Audit Team

“What is it? Please tell me quickly!”

There’s no problem up until they take over, but the real issue is… they just stay there.

What is he talking about?

I tilted my head.

They just stay there? It’s not even burned rice, what on earth does this mean?

To be precise, the audit team will stay there until they feel it’s ‘safe.’ Whether the commanding officers return or not, they keep occupying it, regardless.

“Then, the audit team will not only have to provide lodging but also meal expenses, and whatever action they take, they’ll be interrupted. You won’t even be able to eat the pudding you like, Maru?”

Ugh. That’s not okay! That’s really terrible!

“Right?”

I thought it wasn’t a big deal, but the audit team are terrifying people.

Oh my god. How could they stop someone from eating pudding?

And this is a secret, but I heard they eat pineapple pizza with stock or put rice in their soup…!” Hiiiii?!

Also, after finishing their meals, they sit in the center of the command room and have a mint-chocolate party. With Sol’s eyes, too! There’s even a rumor that they eat spicy pudding.

Th-That’s impossible…

Every time I heard the commanding officer’s detailed explanation, food started to flash before my eyes.

…No, I’m not even sure if I should call it food. Just looking at it, my appetite seems to disappear.

Especially that last one. Spicy pudding.

What is that? How can such a thing even exist?

I imagine a soft, sweet pudding with chili powder sprinkled on it, generously.

And then muscular men eating it as if it’s delicious… Oh my god.

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.

Cheese crust!!

Ah, it was “Jesus Christ.”

“They also don’t allow alcohol or cigarettes. Ugh. How can they be so inflexible…”

I know, right?

I nodded in agreement with the commanding officer’s words… Wait a second, what did I just hear?

They don’t only ban cigarettes but also alcohol?

“Excuse me, Commander. What did you just say?”

“Huh? …Ah.”

Hearing my sharp words, the commanding officer started stepping back, looking flustered.

But there’s no way he’s getting away with this.

I immediately grabbed the commanding officer’s hand tightly and frowned as I looked up at him.

“No alcohol. No cigarettes. They’re bad for your health!”

“But…”

“Ah, you’ll age quickly like that. I saw a lot of white hairs the other day.”

“Ugh.”

“From today, it’s no alcohol, no cigarettes.”

Drinking and smoking when you’re young just ruins your body and, well, it’s full of bad points.

If the commanding officer gets sick, who will supply my pudding?

“Still, just one pack a day…”

“Tsk. You want to smoke while you have a kid? Do you know how harmful second-hand smoke is? I saw it on the internet. It makes your body feel bad and sluggish…It even prevents you from growing taller!”

“Hehe, looks like Maru’s gotten really sensitive because of the pudding.”

“Ah.”

As I scolded the commanding officer while placing my hand on my hip, the door to the command room opened and Nunu came in.

I wondered where she had been earlier. Looks like she was outside. What’s that she’s holding?

“Oh, this? Hehe. You can look forward to it.”

“Yes?”

Nunu slowly extended the bowl she was holding toward me.

I felt like I could hear the sound of Bada… thump thump…

…I want to see Bada. That soft tail, it must’ve been so comfortable to rest my head on.

“Tada! Homemade pudding!”

No way.

What Nunu brought was homemade pudding.

Looking closely, she was wearing an apron. It seems like she just made this warm pudding.

…But can you make pudding just like that? It needs to be refrigerated to set.

Well, whatever. She might have just brought out something she had prepared earlier.

“It looks delicious. Ugh, is this pudding…?”

“Yeah, it’s caramel flavor.”

“Yay!”

As expected, my sister knows my taste well.

With a small spoon next to her, she scooped up the soft pudding and gently placed it in my mouth.

Then, just like a pop, the unique taste of pudding filled my mouth.

The sweet and chewy caramel combined with the soft and fluffy pudding to create an amazing taste.

It was like a waterfall of flavor! A wave of happiness!

It felt especially special because it had been a while since I had it. Ahhh, this is the taste of a real man.

This is the taste of the real deal~

“How is it? Does it suit your taste?”

“It’s delicious!”

I jumped up from my seat.

It suited my taste so well that it completely conquered my tongue.

It’s such a shame that there’s only one of this pudding—it’s almost tragic.

‘Phew, that’s a relief. I was really worried since it was my first time making it.’

“First time? Whoa, it’s good enough to sell as it is! The shape is beautiful, and the taste was amazing!”

“Glad to hear that. I’ll make lots more for you from now on.”

“Yay!”

Creeping, creeping.

While I was smiling happily, out of the corner of my eye, I saw the commander carefully trying to open the office door without making a sound.

What is that old man up to now?

‘Commander, where are you going?’

“Oh, uh? Uh… Ah. Well…”

‘You’re not going out for a smoke, are you?’

“Sm-smoke? No way. I just thought you two looked close, so I was just gonna step outside for a bit…”

Yeah, right. That’s an obvious lie.

The commander looks so nervous, like someone caught trying to escape. One of his hands keeps fidgeting, and he’s even sweating.

It’s like he’s hiding something important in his pocket—he keeps putting his hand in and taking it out of his right pocket…

…Aha. So that’s where the cigarette pack is.

“Oh my, I can’t just ignore what I just heard.”

“Oh, oh? Nunu?”

Just like when she snatched his phone away before, Nunu swiftly moved to grab the evidence.

She moved so fast that even my eyes couldn’t follow as she skillfully swiped the commander’s pocket.

And in her hand—there it was. A small cigarette pack… So he really did have it in his pocket.

She silently stared at the tiny pack.

“Wa-wait! Nunu! I can explain…!”

“Maru, why don’t you go take a shower? You’ve been playing hard, so you must be all dusty. You should wash up.”

Nunu smiled sweetly as she said that, but for some reason, it felt… scary.

Her usual gentle and warm smile somehow felt different.

“Ma-Maru! Wait! Don’t leave me behind!”

“Commander. Let’s have a little chat. About these cigarettes.”

“I’ll go take a shower!”

The commander’s eyes looked desperate. A silent plea for me not to leave.

But I ignored that gaze, opened the door, and quickly scurried off to my room.

The reason? Simple.

He didn’t make me homemade pudding!

“No! My precious collection!!”

I could hear the commander’s agonized scream from behind.

Uh, hmm… Should I not have left? Will he be okay?

“Inhale—Phew…“

Ah, this is nice. My room always feels so cozy, comfortable, and refreshing.

Curling up in my beloved box like this is the best.

…Wait a minute. This isn’t right. I was supposed to take a bath.

I forced myself to shake off the temptation of my fluffy blankets and got out of the box.

When did I even climb inside? Was that my cat instincts kicking in?

But I’m not a cat beastkin.

I don’t really get it.

Shaking my head, I walked into the bathroom and started filling the bathtub, which was slightly larger than my body.

I have no idea how it works, but pressing just one button instantly filled the tub with steaming hot water.

No waiting required. Science and technology are amazing.

I cautiously dipped a finger in to check the temperature.

“Ouch, hot.”

…It was so hot I pulled my hand back instantly.

I should’ve known from all that rising steam. This is way too hot.

If I get in like this, I’ll be boiled alive. I’d become Maru soup. That’s not happening.

Swoosh…

In the end, I turned the faucet all the way to the right and decided to squat and wait.

…So I still have to wait for the water to cool down after all.

I got excited for nothing.

Still, it’s been a while since I had a bath, so I’m looking forward to it.

I’d love to bring some potato chips and cola and watch YouTube, but…

The commander and Nunu seem busy, so I’ll hold off for now.

I’ll just float in the warm water, thinking about nothing—just like a jellyfish.

Wobbling, wobbling. I’ll just laze around like dried-up Maru.

Dried-up Maru, huh? That phrase sounds familiar somehow.

Anyway, I bet it’ll feel great—warm, drowsy, and cozy.

…But I can’t fall asleep.

Last time, I ended up getting water in my nose and ears. That was awful.

I won’t let that happen again.

Drip, drip…

I peeked over to check.

The bathtub was full, with water slightly overflowing, but the steam was gone.

That means the temperature should be just right.

“Hehe.”

Smiling, I stepped into the bathroom.

Squish.

“…Huh?”

With a very unpleasant sensation, a strange sound echoed through the room.

I followed the sound and looked down…

“Oh.”

…And there it was.

My socks, completely soaked with water.

“AAAAHHHHH!!!!!”