Chapter 449: This Isn’t It (1)

When was it?

No, when did it start?

I wasn’t able to clearly remember.

It happened way too long ago, and I didn’t want to remember it.

It was a memory that I wanted to completely erase from my mind, or keep it deep inside to the point I couldn’t remember anymore.

Even though I felt this way, there were things I just couldn’t forget.

Actually, no, I was able to remember memories like this more vividly.

This was my memory at the time.

I was used to the stench that filled the air in the Demonic Realm.

I even started to use the red moon in the air as an ordinary lantern because of how I was so used to it.

This happened when I went out for a night patrol.

There were less and less survivors as time passed by, and because of that, I was made to go out for patrols more frequently.

Blaze.

Because it got so dark to the point it blocked my vision, I used my flame to make it brighter.

Only the area in front of me got brighter because of the little amount of Qi I had, and I didn’t get any warmer because of it.

Even so, I kept the flame alive as I felt safer this way.

Swish-!

Then, a sudden breeze of wind blew and turned off the flame.

[…]

After staring at my hand for a moment, I looked to the left with a frown.

[What do you think you are doing? Do you want to die?]

I spoke in an angry tone.

That breeze just now was made artificially.

The person who took my flame out, stared at me with her usual cold gaze.

[I clearly warned you not to use your flame without my permission.]

I clicked my tongue shortly after hearing her cold tone.

[What do I do when I can’t see anything? How am I supposed to go out for a patrol if I can’t see shit?]

[If you can’t see anything, then just don’t. You won’t need to see anything anyway if you can’t see in the first place.]

I immediately frowned after hearing her cold words.

[What a shitty way of speaking to a person.]

[It’s the truth. It’s better for you to see nothing than Demons running after your flame.]

After speaking in a harsh tone, she tied her long golden hair behind her.

Her white neck that was revealed for a second was seductive to other guys’ eyes, but I instead looked away.

Rather than her beauty, her cold words dug into my heart.

[Crawl on the ground because I’m weak. Is that what you are telling me?]

After hearing my response, I saw her shoulders flinch a little.

[…That’s not what I’m…]

[Why are you denying it? It’s fine. It’s not like I’m not used to this treatment or anything.]

By this point, such words didn’t hurt my pride anymore.

After all, I had no pride left in me in the first place.

Well, I guess I had a tiny bit left.

[…You talented bastards won’t understand.]

Was that why I accidentally said that out loud?

[You guys won’t understand what it feels like to crawl on the ground.]

[…]

Golden pupils gazed in my direction.

Those eyes contained a little bit of anger.

I couldn’t understand why anger was contained in those eyes.

She was the greatest Young Prodigy who rose above the Five Dragons and Three Phoenixes because of her generational talent.

What was she getting annoyed about when I was complimenting her talent?

I just couldn’t understand.

[How can you say that when you don’t know anything…?]

She gave that response as she was offended by what I said, but I responded with an annoyed tone.

[And you said what you said because you know everything about me?]

[…]

The lady known as the Celestial Sword bit her lips after hearing my words.

I sighed at the sight.

This was a pointless argument.

I especially hated arguing with talented geniuses.

We wouldn’t understand each other no matter what, so there wasn’t any point in me holding a hassle of a conversation like this.

When I shook my head at the thought, she started to ask me a question.

[Why… do you always complain all the time?]

[What?]

[Do you feel better if you always act that way?]

[Bitch. Are you trying to teach me now? Why are you trying to do something that not even my parents tried?]

Right.

I ended up this way because my parents didn’t educate me.

However, I kept that to myself.

[Even if you are all that-]

[I’m not all that.]

[Are you trying to mock me right now?]

She was known for being talented, yet she was denying my words. What kind of nonsense was this?

However.

[…I’m really not.]

The Celestial Sword spoke to me in an exhausted tone.

I still couldn’t understand her,

[Fine, you aren’t then.]

But I decided to let it pass because it was a hassle.

What am I supposed to do when she says she isn’t talented?

I just hoped that the time would pass by as quickly as possible.

It was because I was annoyed by the fact that I had to go out on a patrol, but I also found it uncomfortable to be around the Celestial Sword.

Because the bastard I previously went on a patrol with became a Demon’s food, I was made to go out with her.

We already argued every time we ran into each other, but of course we had to go on a patrol together now.

That Snow Phoenix bitch. She must’ve done this on purpose.

It was her job to assign people for patrols, and because she knew that I felt uncomfortable around the Celestial Sword, she intentionally put me with her.

As always, I was not fond of her at all.

Anyway, it has been a bit more than a week ever since we became a group.

But we spoke more than usual today.

Though, of course, our conversations were mostly arguments, just like earlier.

After a back and forth of roaring at each other, it became silent.

I actually found the silence comfortable. As I started to count the small rocks that were on the ground, the Celestial Sword started to ask me a strange question.

[What is your goal?]

[…Eh?]

I frowned after hearing her.

What was she talking about…?

It was way too unexpected. What’s my goal?

[What are you talking about all of a sudden?]

[I wondered if even a person like you has a goal.]

[What are you provoking me for? Have you seriously gone insane?]

I was speechless.

It felt as if I had suddenly been punched as I was counting rocks on the ground.

Not only that, but my goal?

[…]

I thought deeply to myself, but I wasn’t able to think of anything.

I didn’t really live a life with a goal.

How would I have a goal when I didn’t feel attachment towards my life?

Of course, I had none. I simply breathed to live.

Thinking about it worsened my mood.

Staring at the Celestial Sword with an annoyed expression, I asked her a question.

[Then what about you, do you have a goal?]

[…]

The Celestial Sword turned her head away to avoid eye contact after she heard my question.

[Huh, you don’t have one either? We are the same then.]

When I spoke with a smirk, the Celestial Sword turned her head my way with fiery eyes.

It seemed like she was rather insulted by how I compared myself to her.

[…I… do…]

Unlike her fierce expression, her voice was rather quiet.

It also sounded like she was a bit embarrassed.

[You do? What is it then?]

I honestly wasn’t curious, but I asked her anyway.

There was no need for me to learn about other people’s goals in life after all.

[…]

Despite hearing me, the Celestial Sword gave no response.

I wondered what kind of a grand goal it was for her to hesitate that much.

Was it to become the Alliance Leader? Or to become the Zenith?

That might be a bit hard.

But to be fair, it would’ve been understandable for her to have such goals because of how talented she was.

As I continued to wait for her answer with those thoughts, the Celestial Sword finally spoke in a very low voice.

[…ther.]

[What?]

I couldn’t hear her because of how quiet she was. When I asked again with my ears closer to her,

[…Mother…]

The Celestial Sword answered again, with her ears slightly becoming red.

Mother?

[…?]

I backed away a little with a strange expression after hearing her answer.

[…What.]

Mother out of the blue? What was she talking about?

Did I mishear her?

[…Mother?]

[…]

I asked her again just to make sure, but it seemed like I didn’t mishear her the first time, judging from her expression.

After seeing my reaction, the Celestial Sword started to speak to me angrily as if she felt embarrassed.

[…What…? Is that weird?]

[You think it isn’t? Of course, it’s weird when you suddenly say your goal is being a mom.]

[…Being a mother is an important goal to have. Why don’t you know that?]

[Perhaps it’s because I don’t have one? I’m not sure.]

[…]

The Celestial Sword shut her mouth after hearing my dark joke.

I didn’t really intend that, though.

[But like, why is that your goal of all things?]

Why was it being a ‘mother’ when she had so many great things to look forward to?

It was the most random thing I’ve heard recently.

[…That’s not necessarily my goal.]

[But you just said it was.]

[I just… dream of living a normal life.]

[Hmm?]

A normal life?

[I want to meet a person I love, marry them, have kids with them… fight and make up with them, and grow old together… A life like that.]

My mouth felt drier the more I listened.

[Then do it. What’s stopping you?]

It didn’t sound all that impressive for that to be her goal.

Her goal wasn’t to become a strong master or to become the Lord of a great clan.

Instead, the Celestial Sword said she wanted to live a normal life like everyone else, but I found it hard to understand.

I couldn’t understand why she was calling it a goal, when she was able to do that right now.

Did she read my thoughts?

The Celestial Sword made a bitter smile on her face.

[That’s true. It is very easy.]

Despite giving that response, I was able to hear what she quietly murmured after.

-But I find such a simple thing to be very difficult…

That’s what she said.

She didn’t say anything to me after this conversation.

I didn’t ask her anything either.

It almost felt as if the night became darker. Along with her, I shut my mouth to keep the silence.

That night came to an end, but for some reason, I wasn’t able to get rid of this memory from my mind.

Why wasn’t I able to forget it when it wasn’t anything special?

If I had to list one reason, perhaps it was when I started to be interested in the Celestial Sword without realizing it.

Was I interested in her because I found it fascinating that her goal was to live a normal life?

Or if that wasn’t it, maybe it was because of the pitiful expression she had on her face that night?

I still didn’t know the answer.

By the time I realized, I found myself having the same goal.

It was also probably then, that I started to have a goal.

I told no one about it, and I didn’t even realize I had this goal even till my death.

The ironic part was…

Whether it was her goal or mine, even until the moment of our deaths, none of us achieved our goals.

Was I mistaken?

No.

It was not a mistake at all.

The Celestial Sword’s gaze was right on me for sure.

Why was she looking at me when there were so many other Demonic Humans around?

I continued to check, thinking that it was a coincidence, but the Celestial Sword’s gaze was still locked on me without moving one bit.

As I stood in shock while staring at her golden pupils,

Slam.

“…!”

I started to feel a sudden vibration from the inside of my body.

I rubbed my chest.

What is it?

Slam… Slam.

The vibration continued in my chest.

It felt as if it was growing in size.

…This is.

The vibration I felt from my body.

I felt like I knew what it was.

I immediately gazed at the Celestial Sword.

She continued to stare at me in shock, and I probably had a similar expression.

It seemed like she was feeling something as well, just like me.

I curled my hand into a fist at the thought.

Damn it.

Slam. Slam.

It continued to vibrate.

No, this wasn’t a vibration.

It was resonance.

The same type of energy was resonating with each other.

My eyes moved rapidly after confirming that fact.

Why didn’t I expect that this would happen?

…Bullshit, how would I expect such a thing?

Even I wasn’t aware of this energy inside my body.

I wasn’t even sure if it was still inside my body, or if it disappeared.

I struggled with this because I wasn’t able to check myself.

But this energy that currently resonated with the Celestial Sword-

Celestial Sword…

It was the energy that came from ‘her’ that I met in my current life.

It was resonating with the Celestial Sword, who was up there currently.

She felt this as well, which was why she was showing that expression.

This was a mistake.

I didn’t think this would happen.

I failed to expect that this energy would resonate with her.

I was certain that the Demon Emperor would notice my Destructive Flame Art if I didn’t lock it away,

…But this?

I really didn’t expect that the Celestial Sword would notice this.

There was a different problem too.

I can’t even hide this even if I wanted to.

I didn’t know how to control the Celestial Sword’s energy inside my body, so I wasn’t able to hide it.

Thanks to that…

Slam, Slam, Slam-!

The resonance with her became worse.

As I started to feel sick as my head echoed,

“…You even called that bitch here, so you must desire war.”

I heard the Demon Emperor speak as he looked at the Celestial Sword.

“It’s not me who wants to see blood, but you lots instead. Isn’t that correct?”

I was able to notice that his killing intent got much denser than before.

It felt as if he was ready to kill everyone.

In response, the Heavenly Venerable spoke to the Demon Emperor with his hands still behind his back.

“I’ll say it again, but we came here to suggest a deal.”

“If you are going to continue speaking nonsense, then I shall pull your tongue out in this spot.”

Crack.

The spot the Demon Emperor was standing on cracked.

From the cracks, flames started to rise.

“It’s a good timing. That worthless bitch came here and that means I can just kill you both here.”

Bullshit.

The bastard had no intention of killing them.

It was obvious he was thinking hard about how he could send them back.

Slam…

Ugh.

The resonance I felt from my Dantian increasingly became worse.

Then, I felt someone come behind my back and place their hand on it.

Qi inside my body started to flow fluidly.

The resonance was still there, but I suppose I felt a bit better?

When I stared at the sudden sensation I felt, I saw the Demonic Sword was behind me, touching my back.

The Demonic Sword stared at me and asked.

“…Are you okay…?”

“…Thank… you.”

I was very surprised.

I stared at the Demonic Sword unexpectedly.

Why was she doing such a thing when she despised making contact with others?

I was glad because I felt better now, but I still couldn’t help but feel shocked and confused.

As my head cooled down thanks to the Demonic Sword’s help…

Swish-!

The Celestial Sword who was floating in the air, descended down to the ground.

“…”

I was able to see it more clearly than before.

It was indeed her from this time period.

Her beauty rivaled the Demonic Sword’s, and she had brilliant golden hair that gave off an exotic aura.

She seemed much more mature than the Wi Seol-Ah I met in my current life, and her beauty had definitely bloomed by this point in time.

Moreover, I felt a cold atmosphere around her.

“…Demon Emperor.”

After landing on the ground lightly, the Celestial Sword spoke to the Demon Emperor.

In response, the Demon Emperor increased his Combat Qi.

“You must not value your life, for you to come here with your own two feet.”

“…We don’t want to fight.”

“You gathered all of those forces here, yet you don’t want to fight? Surely, you’re not saying that for me to believe it.”

“…”

“Just be honest and say you want war. Then, I shall gladly accept your request.”

“…Like the Heavenly Venerable said, we just want to make a deal with- “

Rumble-!

Before the Celestial Sword could finish, a giant quantity of flames poured out from the Demon Emperor.

The Celestial Sword’s blades in the air charged towards the flames.

Like earlier, I saw the flames disappear.

It was flames made with Demonic Qi, so her Destruction of Demon power was able to erase it fully.

As the Celestial Sword frowned at the sudden attack, the Demon Emperor spoke to her.

“You are mistaken.”

Flames continued to burn and wrap around the Demon Emperor’s body.

“Do you all still think that you could resolve this through a conversation?”

Demonic Humans started to charge their Demonic Qi after seeing the Demon Emperor’s gesture.

“I thought I successfully burned all the flower fields that filled your minds, but it seemed like there’s still some remaining.”

“…Demon Emperor.”

The Celestial Sword bit her lips.

Even during this, I felt her gaze flick to me from time to time.

“If there’s something you want, then try to- “

“…We shall return the Thunder Fang.”

The Demon Emperor paused right as he was about to charge towards the Celestial Sword.

I paused as well.

Though, of course, I paused for a different reason.

Did she say… Thunder Fang?

I stared at the Demonic Sword after hearing her.

The Demonic Sword wasn’t hiding her displeasure when she heard the Celestial Sword’s words.

Judging from her expression, it indeed seemed like the Thunder Fang was on the opposing side.

But… what does that mean?

I felt my heart beat much faster after I learned this truth.

It was understandable for me to react this way.

As far as I remembered, the Thunder Fang had never left the Demonic Sword’s hand in my memories.