Chapter 44: Change

After the eventful arts festival, getting caught by the head of student affairs, having a minor fight, and making up during the school trip.

Even after all these big and small incidents, nothing had really changed between So-yul and me.

Perhaps the only difference was that we both became more careful, sharing the understanding that “we’d be in big trouble if we got caught again.”

Thanks to this, So-yul no longer came to talk to me or sit next to me in class. Our eyes only met occasionally during morning hours. A fortunate change.

On the other hand, since we had to maintain our fake relationship, we needed to find ways to meet somehow.

A dating spot with no risk of getting caught, enough time to talk at length, and not taking up too much of our time. Using process of elimination, there weren’t many places left.

One of those places was…

“It’s been a while since we’ve been to the piano room.”

The first Saturday morning after the school trip.

I said this while putting down my bag on the piano room desk.

The last time I’d been here was two weeks before midterms, so it had been over a month already. I heard So-yul practically lived here. Some boyfriend I was, not even thinking to visit.

So-yul could practice piano, I could focus on studying, we could chat occasionally. It should be a perfect space for both of us.

Plus.

“No one can eavesdrop from outside because of the piano sound. There’s a door lock so we can hide if someone comes. Thinking about it, it’s much safer than the club room.”

Though we’d been spotted entering the building before, no one had ever barged into the piano room. If we’d met here instead of the club room from the start, we probably wouldn’t have been caught by the teacher. We’d been careless and stupid.

Though I said this with such thoughts in mind.

“…Yeah. Right.”

Somehow So-yul’s response was lukewarm at best.

I glanced at her condition on the piano bench. So-yul was just staring intently at the piano keys. Her pink lips were tightly closed, her face completely expressionless.

She’d had an inexplicably subtle awkwardness about her since earlier.

I snorted and opened my mouth:

“What’s wrong?”

“…What do you mean?”

“You seem kind of shy today for some reason.”

“Why would I be shy? How long have we been seeing each other?”

“Well, that’s true.”

That’s why it’s strange, isn’t it?

Even excluding times we just passed by each other, it had been almost two months now. There was no reason for sudden awkwardness. From our very first meeting she’d been snapping at me and playing around. Why get distant now?

As I pondered these small doubts, So-yul let out a “hmph” and:

“Just. I’m trying to focus on playing.”

“Is that so.”

“Yeah.”

After decisively ending the conversation, So-yul placed both hands on the keys. As her long fingers moved, an intense melody immediately assaulted my ears. It seemed too difficult for just a warm-up exercise.

Resting my chin in my hand while quietly watching this scene, I casually threw out:

“It’s not because of what happened during the school trip?”

Boom.

A discord echoed throughout the piano room.

When I uncovered my ears after the sudden noise, So-yul was frozen with her whole hand pressing the keys. Her eyes were wide open, her mouth moving without sound coming out.

It was exactly how someone whose true thoughts had been discovered would act.

Could it really be because of what happened during the school trip?

If so, there was something that made sense. Until now I’d wondered why she was acting so strange. If her attitude toward me had changed after the school trip, there could only be one reason.

Probably So-yul kept remembering… when she had to use the bathroom and desperately clung to me, making her embarrassed.

Of course, it was understandable. If it were me, I’d probably spend several sleepless nights kicking my blanket.

But being this embarrassed meant we could barely even talk properly. Though I couldn’t exactly say “It’s okay. Everyone uses the bathroom” – I’d definitely get hit for that.

Finally I pretended not to know and asked:

“What are you doing?”

At my quiet question, So-yul turned her head away curtly and:

“…The piano just isn’t playing how I want.”

“From what I saw you were warming up with exercise pieces. Can those even be hard to play?”

Though I asked a fair question, So-yul glanced at me sideways. Her cheeks were tinged red, her lips protruding in what seemed like a sulky expression.

In that state she replied briefly:

“You don’t even know anything about piano.”

“Well, true, I don’t know much.”

“See?”

As if that settled it, So-yul clicked her tongue and immediately started playing the exercise piece again.

Oh my, how dare I question the piano genius. Moreover, since I really was ignorant about piano, I had nothing more to say. All I could do was lock my mouth.

So I decided to start studying right away, taking out my books and pencil case from my bag.

Sometimes when deeply focused on something, you can’t even hear surrounding sounds. Watching students concentrate on studying in the noisy classroom every morning really drives this point home.

That’s how it was for me right now.

About an hour after opening my books. So-yul’s constant piano playing that had been ringing in my ears suddenly couldn’t be heard.

The piano room was surprisingly small. Even covering your ears wouldn’t keep out the playing completely.

Yet even that loud noise was now completely quiet. Surely thanks to my excellent concentration.

Wearing a satisfied smile, I glanced toward So-yul… for some reason she had stopped playing and was just quietly watching me.

Maybe it wasn’t concentration – it had actually gotten quiet.

As soon as our eyes met, So-yul frantically turned her head around. She seemed about to play then suddenly read the sheet music. She looked at the wall clock then adjusted the piano bench position.

In short, she seemed quite flustered.

She kept acting suspiciously today. I let out a laugh and:

“Why were you staring at my face?”

“I wasn’t looking!”

What nonsense.

“Then why did you get so flustered just now?”

“When was I flustered? I just stretched my neck because my body was stiff.”

“You’re lying.”

“I’m not lying.”

So-yul, who had been blatantly making excuses, crossed her arms and stared straight at me, then:

“Or maybe you’re the one who thinks everyone’s always looking at you?”

She showed a subtle smile with narrowed eyes as she said this.

It had been quite a while since I’d played along with So-yul’s teasing. While joy bloomed inexplicably inside me, I also felt like giving her a light knock on the head as usual. She really had a talent for getting under my skin.

So this time at least, I wanted to give it back.

With this feeling, I looked at So-yul and smirked.

“Yeah. Maybe so.”

“…What?”

So-yul showed signs of deliberate bewilderment. Her reaction was exactly as predicted, making it even funnier. Without backing down, I took the next step.

“I think I’ll do some stretching here too. You go ahead and continue your piano practice.”

After saying this, I turned my chair 90 degrees. Of course, facing toward So-yul. Her hand movements, face, and expressions – an S-class seat where I could see all of So-yul at once.

By the way, right now she wore an expression suggesting my sudden counterattack was outrageous.

It didn’t take long for dissatisfaction to cloud that face.

“Really, you idiot.”

“Okay. I’ll be an idiot, so hurry up and play piano.”

“Idiot!”

“I said okay.”

Even when trying to say something mean, seems she could only manage the word “idiot.” She always looked so innocent and cute.

But I couldn’t keep playing along forever. If she called me idiot one more time, next I’d have to praise her as a genius. Since So-yul always got embarrassed being called a genius, it would be quite effective.

As if reading this resolution, So-yul let out a light sigh and placed her hands on the keys.

Then.

“…Idiot.”

Before I could respond, she immediately started playing.

Of course, it was completely different from what she’d played at the arts festival.

This time, unlike then, the tone was much warmer.

Though she clearly pressed many keys, all the notes flowed into my ears like a stream. The soft and cozy melody even created a ticklish feeling around my chest.

And above all… So-yul’s expressions and gestures while playing were incredibly beautiful.

Her fair, slender fingers danced, striking the keys sometimes gently, sometimes strongly.

Her half-closed eyes seemed to caress each note flowing from the piano.

From her pink-tinged cheeks to the corners of her slightly raised lips, her joy in playing itself transmitted clearly.

A wonderful performance that filled me with love just watching quietly.

Yet she talked about quitting piano. That shouldn’t even be mentioned as a joke.

“…Did I pass?”

“What?”

A moment later when I came to my senses, So-yul was looking straight at me. Looking closely, her hands had already left the keys.

The performance had ended without me noticing.

They say when deeply focused on something you can’t hear surrounding sounds… I belatedly felt this acutely.

Scratching my head though it wasn’t itchy, I answered:

“I was so focused because you played so well. Honestly, I couldn’t take my eyes off…”

“See? Earlier you said you’d do stretching, but you ended up watching me, right?”

“What? N-no.”

Though I was in the middle of giving praise, So-yul cut in with her hands on her hips.

Who knew it was a leading question? Or was I just stupid enough to answer straightforwardly? Either way, I was definitely an idiot as So-yul said.

Then So-yul furrowed her brows and muttered pointedly:

“Liar.”

Well, better than being called idiot I suppose.

“Anyway, I mean I enjoyed listening. It was soft, warm, cozy, beautiful.”

“Hmph.”

I added these summarizing words to finish my praise, but So-yul turned her head sharply as if she didn’t want to hear. But what could she do? Her cheeks were noticeably turning bright red.

This too was a side she didn’t usually show.

Usually she’d just smugly say “Right?” and preen. But now she pretended not to listen, yet secretly listened and got embarrassed. I was confused about how to match her mood.

As I wondered about this.

“…Are you only going to praise me with words?”

So-yul quietly asked this question.

What was she talking about? Tilting my head, I asked back:

“Isn’t praise usually given with words?”

“You really don’t know?”

“…Should I give you praise stickers?”

“Are you treating me like a kid?”

So-yul puffed up her cheeks and showed her anger. She was quick to catch on as always.

What kind of praise was she asking for? Not words, not stickers. Definitely not wanting material things. Then was she hoping for actions? Since So-yul and I were fake lovers…

When my thoughts reached there, the most appropriate answer came to mind.

“You want me to pat your head?”

“…”

No answer came.

Thankfully I didn’t miss the very slight nod she gave.

For So-yul to directly ask to be patted on the head. Until the school trip, this would have been unthinkable even as a joke. It really felt like so much had changed during that one night.

But it wasn’t particularly surprising. That day So-yul had drawn a very clear line.

A fake dating relationship was one where head pats were okay.

Nothing more, nothing less. No need for broader interpretation. So-yul just asked her fake boyfriend for head pats as a fake girlfriend. I needed to be wary of attaching unnecessary meaning.

Everything is hardest the first time.

“Okay.”

I answered quietly and stood up.

With each step toward the piano, So-yul’s shoulders twitched. For whatever reason she was so nervous, she had both hands clasped over her chest. By the time I got close, her eyes were gently closed.

Finally I arrived right next to So-yul. Eyes closed, hands clasped, head tilted for easy access. She was completely prepared.

So I very slowly reached my hand toward her neatly arranged hair…

Pat pat. After tapping her head a few times, I returned to my seat.

Only when I plopped back in my chair did So-yul open her tightly shut eyes. She looked around as if searching for me, then tilted her head when she saw me sitting in the chair.

“…Was that it?”

“Yeah. That’s it.”

When I answered lightly, So-yul’s eyes immediately turned fierce. Bubble bubble. I could almost hear the sound effect that wasn’t actually there.

“You could have done more when I went so far as to ask.”

“You wanted more?”

“M-maybe…”

So-yul mumbled while fidgeting with her fingertips.

Usually So-yul teased me, but right now I was teasing So-yul. I felt an undeniable catharsis bubbling up from deep in my chest.

Savoring this almost pleasurable sensation, I spoke smoothly:

“Okay. I’ll pat you more.”

“…Really?”

So-yul asked again with bleary eyes.

Giving her a fresh smile, I answered:

“Yeah.”

Then.

“If you say ‘Please pat my head, Woo-jin oppa.'”

That morning.

I learned that even stacked sheet music could become a weapon.