Chapter 404: Gilbert

I thought I could go home right after the abdication ceremony, but sadly, that was the naive assumption of an inexperienced youngster. In fact, the real schedule began after the ceremony.

A new Emperor had to fill the void left by a giant who had led the empire for decades. Naturally, as the new Emperor, I had to show the entire continent that I can ‘completely fill this void.’ If I failed to do this properly, the country would be in turmoil, and foreign nations would subtly look for opportunities.

So, far from going home, I’ve been tied to the Emperor like a set from the day of the abdication ceremony until now. I’ve been stuck for days with someone I’d go crazy seeing even occasionally.

Damn it.

If there’s any consolation, it’s that it’s not just the Emperor and me stuck together, but all five dukes are accompanying us too. If it were just the two of us, I’d have run away, void or no void.

Thanks to this, I inwardly sighed while watching the Emperor seated on the throne and nobles prostrating themselves to pledge loyalty. Those gentlemen will go straight home after pledging loyalty, so why am I here?

…Actually, I know why. Having the godfather of the Crown Princess, first in line for succession, and the eccentric who can cut the sky with a sword by the newly ascended Emperor’s side helps the Emperor’s authority.

Conversely, if I’m not by the Emperor’s side, anxiety might spread about possible discord between the Emperor and me.

It’s better to stick with the Emperor, annoying as it is, than to deal with that anxiety. Politics is indeed a headache-inducing, dog-eat-dog business.

“Your loyalty pleases the Retired Emperor as well. We too shall show unwavering trust as long as you do not forsake your duties first. Continue to serve the imperial family and the empire.”

“We shall certainly live up to Your Majesty’s trust.”

Anyway, the Emperor gave a ceremonial response to the nobles’—specifically the Eastern grand lords’—loyalty pledge.

Of course, in such a formal event, no response is more reassuring than a ceremonial one. Giving a different response might cause the nobles’ minds to race and overload. There’s no need to make the nobles rack their brains from the beginning of the reign.

If there’s something he truly wants to say, it’s enough to arrange a private audience, not in a public setting.

“The grand lords’ loyalty pledge is complete.”

After the Eastern grand lords bowed deeply and withdrew, the Duke of Victory, standing to the Emperor’s left, spoke.

The Emperor nodded with a somewhat relaxed expression at those words. From the high-ranking administrative officials in the capital to the imperial counts, and now the grand lords spread across the empire. We can consider all the urgent fires extinguished.

Now it’s the turn of the minor lords and the military?

Although these are just the urgent matters. There are still far more people left than those who have finished.

“We must give time to rest to the loyal subjects who have hurriedly come to the capital. Let’s pause the audiences for now.”

“A truly wise decision, Your Majesty.”

The Emperor, perhaps also thinking of the many remaining people, declared a break after a brief silence.

Honestly, it’s a natural decision since loyalty pledges aren’t a neighborhood mart sale event. If we continue without breaks, it might feel odd even for those pledging loyalty. They’d feel disappointed, as if their loyalty was being treated like clearance items.

With the Emperor’s declaration of a break, the dukes who had been maintaining the atmosphere near the throne began to disperse. I was about to go find somewhere to rest—

“The Minister of Inspection shall remain. We have urgent matters to discuss.”

“…Yes, Your Majesty.”

You bastard.

Is it that unbearable to let me rest for a moment?

I gently closed my eyes as I watched some dukes naturally putting bottles to their lips or taking out cigars as they left, and Beatrix’s back as she hesitantly exited while glancing at me.

Should I hit him just once?

I seriously considered it. It hasn’t even been a week since I pledged loyalty, so I should be able to cancel my loyalty subscription without any penalty. So couldn’t I cancel it and hit him once? Wouldn’t it be okay if I pledge loyalty again afterward?

I know it’s a crazy thought, but my hand is twitching. It feels like if not now, I’ll never have the chance.

No, actually, even now isn’t a chance, but I can at least rationalize it to myself.

“I can finally breathe. Meeting people non-stop was a bit suffocating.”

Regardless, the Emperor let out a small sigh and slumped in the throne. He looked like a head of household who had just finished work and returned home.

I almost instinctively cursed at that sight. Is only your discomfort valid, while my exhaustion is some passive skill a black cow has to bear? Think about my position of having to be alone with my boss too.

“You’ve worked hard, Your Majesty.”

But the words that came out of my mouth were different from my true feelings. It’s a civil servant’s fate to not express outwardly, no matter how dog-like the boss is.

“How could I be the only one who worked hard? The Minister and the dukes have also labored to maintain their positions.”

It’s even worse that you know this and still keep only me here.

Perhaps that deep resentment and anger showed in my eyes, as the Emperor chuckled softly and continued.

“The dukes are quite old, aren’t they? Even the youngest, the Wise Duchess, is in his 40s, so we in our 20s, you and I, should be considerate.”

I closed my mouth for a moment at the mention of age.

Even cowardly using facts.

Indeed, the youngest duke is in his 40s, and the oldest is over 80, isn’t he? Even as Emperor, it must have been awkward to keep such elders around constantly.

Right, given the current situation, the young ones should work a bit harder. The instinct of respecting elders still remains in my blood.

“And as I just said, I have urgent matters to discuss, which is why I had only the Minister remain.”

With those words, the Emperor took out a small bottle of alcohol from his breast pocket. Two bottles, in fact.

…?

What the hell?

Why is a bottle of alcohol coming out of his breast pocket?

“Take it. It’s just enough for a palate cleanser, so don’t worry about getting drunk.”

“Ah, yes.”

Though a bit surprised, I quickly collected myself and took the bottle.

Having been trained by the Wise Duchess, I’m not shaken by this much. I just flinched because someone unexpected suddenly pulled out alcohol from an unexpected place.

I couldn’t help but smile as I watched the Minister receive the bottle with a bewildered expression. I didn’t expect to be drinking vodka straight from the bottle while sitting on the throne either. And quite a strong one at that.

But this place made me do something beyond imagination. It might sound like an excuse, but it’s truly so. If anyone says otherwise, I’d like to tell them to say it after sitting on this throne.

Even with preparation, it’s this much.

I organized my thoughts while quietly taking a sip. The weight that comes with the name of Emperor, a future that will never be peaceful. I prepared for everything. I resolved to move forward despite it all.

But the reality I faced after actually sitting on the throne with the imperial crown on my head was harsh. Although it’s been only a few days, the mental burden I felt in this short time was considerable.

I have to control and handle the nobles who pledged loyalty to me like the Retired Emperor did. I have to imbue meaning into every single word, every gesture. I have to demonstrate the empire’s dignity and secure benefits and justification amidst the fiercely moving international situation.

I experienced all of this in just a few days. I acutely felt it while watching nobles bowing their heads before me, and envoys whose mouths spoke congratulations and friendship while their eyes moved busily.

“I will abandon nothing.”

I recalled the words I said to the Retired Emperor during the abdication ceremony. A kind of rebellion, saying I would move forward maintaining human emotions, not just as the entity of Emperor, despite shouldering the weight of being Emperor.

I couldn’t help but laugh again as I recalled those words, probably the first show of rebelliousness I’d ever displayed to the Retired Emperor.

What a grand dream.

Although I don’t respect the Retired Emperor’s methods, I’m in awe of his achievements. If I had ascended to the throne in the past in place of the Retired Emperor, I doubt whether I could have raised this empire again.

Yet, with such a background, I proudly declared before the Retired Emperor, “I won’t become like you.” I boasted, even though I can’t guarantee reaching where the Retired Emperor did even if I abandoned everything and moved forward like him.

“Minister.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“We are different from the Retired Emperor.”

Yes, different. Vastly different.

“Do you know why I accepted Ainter?”

“…While His Highness Ainter remained neutral unlike the 2nd Prince, Your Majesty showed mercy—“

“It was because I was swayed by emotions.”

It was because of emotions. Unlike the Retired Emperor, I handled imperial affairs solely due to emotions.

“Was it because my position as Crown Prince was secure? Because Ainter was no longer a threat? It wasn’t for such political reasons, but emotional ones.”

The reason for reinstating Ainter as a member of the imperial family was simple. Because the Empress was pregnant with the Crown Princess, I reinstated him out of concern for what the future Crown Princess might say.

I couldn’t bear the thought of how to answer if someday the Crown Princess asked, “Father, why don’t you get along with Uncle?”

“It was too emotional a decision. It’s fortunate that Ainter is a harmless brother without ambition. If I had made such a decision with an ambitious brother, I would have nurtured trouble for the imperial family and the empire with my own hands.”

I closed my eyes. Speaking so honestly made me feel relieved.

This is why I declared before the Retired Emperor that I would abandon nothing, and why I can’t respect his methods. I already knew that I couldn’t move solely on cold reason. Perhaps that’s why I desperately denied the Retired Emperor’s methods and resolved to walk my own path.

Otherwise, it would be admitting that I’m not fit to be Emperor, to be a leader. It would be admitting that I can’t lead this empire.

It’s fortunate that the Minister is here.

It’s truly fortunate. If I confided these feelings to the Empress, she would obviously worry, and if I told my father-in-law, it would eventually reach the Empress’s ears.

Other family? Should I tell Ainter, whom I almost killed, or the babbling Crown Princess?

Friends? I have none, having attended the Academy when I was the First Prince in name only, waiting for my death.

That’s why it’s the Minister. Only to the Minister, a trustworthy partner with a tight lip, can I say such things.

“Despite this, I told the Retired Emperor. That I would walk the path of Emperor in my own way. That I would become Emperor differently from him.”

I opened my eyes again and turned my gaze to the Minister.

“In your view, can I become Emperor? An Emperor who brings peace to the empire and its subjects, like the Retired Emperor?”

The Minister couldn’t open his mouth. Naturally, as these weren’t appropriate words for a newly ascended Emperor to say to his subject. Perhaps my words sounded like a test of loyalty.

I can only apologize. In my comfort, I placed too great a burden on the Minister, my subject.

Embarrassed, I turned my gaze forward again. Still, confiding certainly made me feel better—

“You probably can’t become an Emperor like the Retired Emperor.”

?

I looked back at the Minister, surprised by the unexpected answer. No, I hadn’t even expected an answer in the first place.

“The Retired Emperor seemed born to be a monarch. He was someone who moved only by reason and rationality. Honestly, I don’t think Your Majesty will become an Emperor like him.”

The Minister spoke, disregarding my gaze. His tongue moves unusually eloquently, more so than usual.

“But is there a need to become an Emperor like the Retired Emperor?”

“What?”

I couldn’t help but ask. Is there no need to become such an Emperor?

Of course there is, isn’t there? Emperors as capable as him were rare in the past and will be rare in the future. As the Emperor succeeding him, I should naturally strive to become like him.

“The Retired Emperor, who moved for the empire his entire life, abdicated to Your Majesty. It wasn’t an unavoidable transfer, but his own decision.”

However, the Minister’s thoughts seemed different. He drained the remaining alcohol in one gulp and calmly continued.

“Didn’t he judge that now the empire can be ruled by a human who will protect everything, not an Emperor who has abandoned everything? The Retired Emperor I knew would have persisted even as an immortal if it were for the empire’s benefit.”

I stared blankly at the Minister, unable to respond to those words.

An empire that can be ruled by a human.

I just repeated those words in my mind several times.

A statement that doesn’t separate Emperor and human, but sees the Emperor as human too. A method the Retired Emperor didn’t choose, and couldn’t choose.

…An empire ruled by one who chose the path of a human, not the path of an Emperor.

“That is the empire you will lead.”

I recalled not the words I said to the Retired Emperor, but the words he said to me.

I couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

Seeing the Emperor suddenly start laughing, I felt a chill down my spine.

Did I go too far?

Reason belatedly returned. This would never happen normally. If I wanted to criticize, I would wrap it up as much as possible, not speak so directly. This is nothing short of madness.

But damn it, the alcohol he handed over for a palate cleanser burned my throat and mind. Even the vodka I happened to drink before my possession wasn’t this strong. Did he add fire to the alcohol?

Anyway, my mind clouded by the unexpected alcohol, I ended up countering the Emperor’s lament like a documentary. For once, I felt lucky to be alone with the Emperor.

…Is it really luck?

Seeing the Emperor still laughing, my hands started to tremble.

Still, if I emphasize that I’m drunk, maybe I can avoid punishment due to diminished capacity…?