Chapter 34

A white room called the waiting room.

Only basic furniture was placed.

Should I say it’s fortunate that even those are there?

“Sigh.”

Kim Haemi sighed as she sat on the bed.

A white bed, a white desk, a white chair in a white room.

The all-white room seemed like it could cause mental illness even in those who didn’t have one.

She thought it was quite severe, whoever’s sense it was.

It’s just like being locked in a mental hospital.

It makes you keep doubting.

You can’t tell whether you’re crazy, the world is crazy, or both.

Numerous doubts inside begin to rise and spread like a wildfire.

Although unclear what it was burning, the flames were gradually growing larger.

Flames rising as if to burn everything.

The acrid smoke rising from within seemed to make her feel suffocated.

Whether it was smoke rising or her vision blurring, she couldn’t tell.

Even breathing was difficult due to the acrid smoke.

She hated the scent of ash felt with each inhalation.

“Haa. Haa.”

A stifling heat clings to her exhaled breath.

She closed her eyes tightly. Tears leaked out and flowed down her cheeks.

She wished those tears would cool the rising flames inside.

Now she could understand what the flames born from doubt were burning.

It was belief in herself, confidence, and ultimately, self-esteem.

Burning all of those, it kept growing doubts about herself.

“I really don’t know what’s what anymore.”

The suddenly changed world was just confusing.

As she always did, she hugged her knees. She buried her face in them.

It felt like someone was embracing her, making her mind a little more peaceful.

But she couldn’t help trembling due to the anxiety still remaining in part of her heart.

Ashes remaining in the fully burnt place.

With the sudden disappearance of heat, only a numbingly cold chill settled in her heart.

As her body trembled more, she hugged her knees tighter and buried her head deeper.

Everyone yearns for something special.

Living an ordinary daily life, they hope for a special moment to come to them at some point.

I was the same.

Transmigration to another world, tower climbing novels, apocalypse, and so on.

Things that don’t happen in the modern world, and thus feel more special—I yearned for those moments.

Maybe I subtly wished for the moment when ordinary daily life would turn into extraordinary non-daily life.

While feeling comfortable in the repetitive hamster wheel life, maybe I also secretly longed for the blue sky seen through the window and the vast green plain spread beneath it.

“Life is a comedy when viewed from afar, a tragedy when seen up close.”

That’s right.

I didn’t know when I was just watching the play, but now that I’ve become the clown, I understand.

The anxiety of not knowing when I might die, the pressure coming from that anxiety seemed to weigh heavily on my body.

To the extent that I thought I could die from being crushed.

Even now, I’m wavering about whether this is reality or just my delusion.

I realized that people long for specialness, but what they actually miss is ordinariness.

The sound of boiling stew and the smell of stew that permeates the house through the smoke.

The clattering sound heard while preparing food and mom’s voice calling to eat.

I miss such ordinary daily life that is calm yet soaks into the heart.

Memories tend to be beautified.

Considering that I can remember with a smile even incidents like being hit on the back for not coming out quickly, or being hit on the head with a spoon by mom for complaining about side dishes.

Is it fortunate that I don’t have to worry about family?

I don’t have to worry about mom and dad.

Because they weren’t by my side even before I came here.

Because they’ve been gone for a long time.

Maybe it’s fortunate in a way.

Because I don’t have to worry. Because I only need to care about myself.

“Haha, I really am like trash.”

My laughter trembles.

It’s okay, I’m used to it. It doesn’t matter.

I was alone anyway.

I just need to take care of myself without caring about others.

I raised my head with such resolve.

There was something I realized while fighting depression for a long time.

Depression likes a stationary state.

If I stayed still, it would continuously stick persistently and penetrate deeply inside.

At times like this, the best thing to do was to change the topic to anything else.

Most of the time, I played games.

Because at the moment of playing games, I could immerse myself instantly and enjoy them.

“Status window.”

As I casually murmured, a window appeared in the air.

Looking at the window that appeared, I wondered if even this was an illusion created by my delusion, but I shook my head to shake it off.

If I doubt like that, there’s no end.

I had to be careful because doubt is something that multiplies, each leading to another.

[Kim Haemi]

[Lv.1]

[Class: None (Undetermined)]

[Contracted Constellation: None]

[Stats▼]

[Skills▼]

[Traits▼]

[Inventory▼]

First, I decided to press Stats to understand the overall status.

[Strength: 1]

[Agility: 1]

[Health: 1]

[Endurance: 1]

[Magic Power: 1]

[Wisdom: 1]

[Additional Points: 1]

Stats are unified upon entering the Tower.

That’s how it was in the game I played, so it’s probably correct.

Strength literally increases power. It enhances attack power and affects physical-related skills.

Agility is related to speed. It increases attack speed and movement speed.

Health is HP in games. It also affects health recovery speed.

Endurance works as defense, reducing the amount of damage received.

Magic Power is the concept consumed when using skills, like MP.

Wisdom increases magical attack power and affects magic-related skills.

Of course, it could be different.

I didn’t know what changes would occur as the game was implemented into reality.

But I had already decided where to invest the stats.

First, Health and Endurance are excluded. The Mist Form skill is an excellent evasion skill.

Maybe later, but not investing now is right.

Strength and Agility should be considered as a set.

If you choose Wisdom, you’re on the magic tree, and if you choose Strength and Agility, you’re on the physical tree.

I had to decide whether to go with the physical tree or the magic tree.

I don’t know the exact correlation between the game and this Tower, but many systems and monsters seemed similar.

If I go with the physical tree, it would be the assassin route using the Mist Form skill as an evasion skill.

If I go with the magic tree, it would involve mixing the Mist Form skill with illusion magic to apply debuffs to enemies.

If this world was created based on the game I played…

[Traits▲]

[Swamp (Unique)]

[It becomes more difficult to remove debuffs.]

As expected, even the trait was exactly the same as the character I created.

Then, without the need for consideration, I should go with the magic tree.

In that sense, I increased the Magic Power stat.

Anyway, since Magic Power needs to be increased for both routes, such consideration might not have been necessary.

But it’s not bad to decide in advance.

Because I have too much time left unnecessarily.

“Sigh.”

Seeing that nothing else happens no matter how much I press other things, it seems to be completely blocked.

I couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that even this was implemented exactly like the game.

“This makes it more confusing.”

Wanting some fresh air, I got up from my seat.

And then I stood still.

I realized that there were no windows or doors in this room.

It was a space completely disconnected from the outside and inside.

The moment I realized this fact, it felt like I couldn’t breathe.

It was like someone was strangling me.

I didn’t have claustrophobia or anything…

A sense of helplessness begins to permeate me.

It was just like becoming a puppet tied with thread.

Like becoming a clown who is merely a spectacle to others.

No one comforts my sorrow, and no one feels heartbroken for my misfortune.

They just laugh.

-You’re a perceptive child.

I turned around with a start at the voice coming from the air, but no one was there.

-Don’t trust the Tower too much.

The voice right by my ear is irritating but strangely sweet.

It was a compelling voice that seemed like I would believe it.

-I’m always watching you. If you need help, just say so anytime.

Is it a Constellation? Is it one of the Constellations? What’s the intention behind those words?

-I can help you.

And then suddenly, with a snap sound, no more words were heard.

* * *

Thump thump thump.

The sound of a heart beating violently.

Above it, several eyes appear and disappear repeatedly.

“It’s a shame. I wanted to talk more.”

The thorn vines constricting the heart are visible.

They dug into the flesh, causing wounds in various places and blood to flow.

It seemed still difficult to fully intervene.

For merely throwing in a single word, the backlash was quite severe, but I thought it was worth it.

There’s more than one way to bring down the Tower besides deploying monsters.

For now, I thought it was enough to plant doubts about the Tower in the players.

The Tower will crumble from within.