Chapter 32 : Yeah… well, I’ll take it for now (1)

Not knowing how the situation had unfolded, I blankly stared up at the blue sky.

“…It’s pretty.”

Unlike my troubled mind, the sky was disgustingly beautiful.

While trying to appeal to people with my “I’m a good person” act, I had momentarily forgotten about my dark past life.

Then I was force-fed about ten bowls of red pills.

Thanks to that, my awareness of my bipolar disorder came rushing back.

PTSD came as a bonus, too.

No wonder it had become harder to look at the Spirit ‘s wounds.

The only saving grace was that the status window was helping me, so compared to before, the emotional swings and outbursts were less intense.

What the hell happened while I was out?

All I could remember was throwing up in front of Chanseok and passing out.

According to Sword Ghost, after that, I apparently made my way back to the top floor alone and smoked like a chimney.

By the way, I don’t smoke — not in my past life, not in this one.

I’m someone with pink lungs, okay?

I don’t know.

The more I think about it, the more unsettled I feel.

“…It feels kind of empty.”

I crouched down on the floor and hugged my knees.

Curled up like this, it kind of felt like I was stabilizing.

Right now, I just want to be alone.

It’s not that I hate the warmth of others — I just didn’t want my mood to spread to anyone else.

So, I sat there alone, listening to the sounds of construction, staring absentmindedly at the blue sky.

“…Noona.”

While fumbling my arm in my lonely haze, Sword Ghost came over with a change of clothes.

“Master, I brought some spare clothes. Please give me those — I’ll wash them for you.”

“…Ah, okay.”

“You seem low on energy. Did something happen down there?”

As Sword Ghost tilted her head and looked at me, I debated whether to say something.

Because if I did, she’d definitely say:

“…So I just need to kill all the blonde people, right?”

“Should I exorcise that useless skeleton gatekeeper while I’m at it?”

And then she’d draw her sword without hesitation.

A chill ran down my spine, and I swallowed the words that almost escaped.

“It’s nothing, just feeling a bit down.”

“Is that so?”

“…Yeah. Oh, right. We’ve got a new member.”

“A new member?”

“I brought in a resident.”

“You—you bought a slave?”

She instantly looked heartbroken and grabbed onto my arm.

Her eyes, shimmering like a sad puppy, made me chuckle.

“…No, I just thought it’d be nice to have things a bit more lively. Not a slave — treat them as an equal.”

“Ah… I see?”

As expected, Sword Ghost seemed to consider residents as something like slaves.

Apparently, both monsters and residents come from a place called the Demon Realm.

I wonder what kind of place that is for people to treat residents like that.

I’ll find out eventually, I guess.

For now, I let the thought go.

I’m just too tired to think about that right now.

“I want to rest.”

“Just change your clothes and rest.”

“Yeah.”

I couldn’t get puke smell on the blankets, so I went to my room, changed clothes, and set aside the ones that had vomit on them.

“Are you going to sleep?”

“Yeah, I’m tired.”

“Should I tell them to stop the construction?”

“No, let it continue.”

“Understood.”

With a slight smile, Sword Ghost bowed and disappeared with my dirty clothes.

Even though I’d been unconscious until now, my mind was extremely exhausted.

I had been forcibly made to relive that miserable past like a vivid screening.

How could I possibly be at ease?

“…Time to sleep.”

Wearing light clothes, I dove under the blankets.

The scent of the blanket, not musty like in my previous life but soft and fresh as if sun-dried, brought me a small sense of comfort.

Of course, naturally, I had a nightmare that night.

***

Inside the medical room of the Myth Guild.

Hanseong looked at Chanseok, who was lying on the bed.

“…Sorry, Master. I should’ve stopped you.”

“Haah… No, it’s fine. I didn’t think you’d actually go into the Tower.”

Hanseong waved his hand, telling the apologetic Hanyul it was okay, and turned his gaze back to Chanseok.

“…Were you out of your mind going in there?”

“……”

Chanseok, now regaining consciousness, looked visibly confused.

‘According to the Gumiho, he’d been brainwashed.’

The younger brother he cherished so dearly had apparently been under mind control.

It seemed to be more of a hypnosis-like skill than traditional brainwashing.

There had definitely been something strange about Chanseok lately.

He used to be a playful person, but once he entered the Tower, he became cold, almost possessed, slaughtering monsters as if in a trance.

He didn’t care about the damage to his own body either.

Hanseong had even been horrified by how reckless and destructive Chanseok had become.

“…Hyung.”

Chanseok called Hanseong “hyung” (big brother).

Since he usually called him “Master,” Hanseong could tell how confused Chanseok really was and listened closely.

“What have I been all this time?”

“Was my desire for revenge over our family fake?”

“Or was it me who was fake all along?”

Chanseok stared at his hands with wavering eyes.

Hanseong and Hanyul looked at him with pity.

They couldn’t give him a simple answer.

Even if he was manipulated, the rage he’d shown toward monsters had been real.

After a moment of thought, Hanseong gently spoke his name.

“Chanseok.”

“…What.”

“Your family means a lot to you, right?”

“Of course.”

“Then it’s real. Your desire for revenge, and you yourself—those are real.”

“…But I was being controlled.”

“Isn’t it because of that very desire for revenge that you became vulnerable to being controlled?”

Hanyul chimed in to support Hanseong’s words.

“……”

Hearing that, Chanseok placed a hand over his chest and took a deep breath.

“…I feel a little better.”

“Still confused?”

Hanseong asked.

Chanseok hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

“I’m still confused… Not because of my beliefs, but because of that Gumiho.”

“…Why did she help me? Even after all the cruel things I said, even after constantly being hostile.”

Chanseok was truly bewildered.

Normally, anyone would be furious and lose their temper if provoked like that.

But the Gumiho didn’t.

Instead, she dealt with him calmly and even freed him from the hypnosis.

Up until now, Chanseok had believed monsters acted solely on instinct and malice.

But her actions didn’t come from instinct, and they certainly weren’t out of malice.

If she were driven only by instinct, she wouldn’t have done that.

And if she were Evil, she wouldn’t have done him a kindness.

“Are there other monsters like her? If so, is it really right to keep killing them?”

Chanseok looked at Hanseong, feeling as though the beliefs he’d built his whole life were crumbling.

Hanseong and Hanyul could clearly sense his anxiety.

“The Gumiho said she was special.”

“She told me there’s no need to treat monsters in other Towers.

However, Hanseong was thinking:

‘…What was that?’

He recalled the strange behavior of the Gumiho and mentally drew a question mark.

‘Split personality?’

‘Or maybe Chanseok provoked it and its true nature came out?’

Still, since even that other personality seemed fundamentally friendly toward humans, he didn’t feel too worried.

It was just pure curiosity.

‘I should drop by and ask next time.’

Hanseong decided that he’d visit the Gumiho’s tower when he had the time.

“Let’s stop by the tower again later and apologize, Chanseok.”

“Yeah, we should.”

Seeing Chanseok give a faint smile, Hanseong lightly patted his shoulder in encouragement.

“Get some rest, and once you’re fully recovered, come to the conference room.”

“Got it.”

Since Chanseok hadn’t completely recovered yet, Hanseong decided to postpone the scheduled meeting.

It was difficult to proceed without the vice guild master anyway.

“Hanyul, don’t mess with Chanseok today and go to school.”

“…You found out I skipped?”

Chanseok let out a snort at Hanyul’s sheepish smile and shot back:

“You’re gonna end up not graduating, you punk.”

“Says the guy who dropped out and only has a middle school diploma.”

“What?!”

“I still have a chance to graduate, right? There’s hope. But what about you?”

Hanyul laughed mockingly as if to say how pathetic.

In response, Chanseok blasted her with a flash of light magic.

“Argh!!”

“Talking back to your older brother now?”

“You lunatic!”

Hanseong watched the two with a satisfied smile.

‘…They really do seem like real siblings.’

He let out a soft chuckle, reminded of himself and his younger sister in the past.

“Have fun, I’m heading out.”

“Bye, Master.”

“Later.”

Hanseong walked leisurely out of the infirmary, smiling as he heard crashing noises and startled guild members scrambling around behind him.

***

“…Hoo…”

That morning, I stood in the yard, stretching lightly while breathing in the chilly breeze.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, Yubin.”

I comforted myself, reminding myself of the promise not to be bound by my past life.

“…Let’s do our best today too!”

For starters, I decided to try overcoming the bipolar disorder and trauma, just as the status window advised.

And right then, the Spirit crawled over to me, rubbing her eyes.

“…Good morning…?”

“Ah, hey, Spirit.”

“…It’s Stella.”

Stella still seemed wary of me.

But she was cute the way she clung to me whenever other monsters appeared.

“Are you getting used to the tower?”

“…A little, I think.”

Stella gave an awkward smile.

Just smiling in front of me was already major progress.

“Good, let’s do our best again today.”

“Yes.”

Today, I planned to strengthen the tower’s security a bit more.