Chapter 28: Arts Festival (5)

“I… watching you perform today, I really felt you were amazing.”

So-yul suddenly lifted her head. My words must have seemed unexpected as she tilted her head slightly. She looked like she wanted to ask what I was suddenly talking about.

I continued regardless:

“I was completely immersed the whole time watching. Though I don’t know piano or the piece… as I listened my heart started beating faster and faster. During the urgent parts I even felt like I was being chased. Got goosebumps all over. It’s hard to explain properly, but, well, that’s how it was.”

“Mmm…”

So-yul nodded somewhat bewilderedly. Her eyes looking straight up at me still held questioning light.

Nothing could be done about it. Words coming out automatically without passing through my brain were bound to be disorganized. If anything, even I had no sense of what I was trying to say.

But I didn’t stop. I just kept letting the words pour out:

“Other people seemed to feel the same way. Most of them watched without moving an inch. Someone even unconsciously exclaimed in admiration right after it ended.”

“…Really?”

“Really. I saw it clearly.”

There was an audience member who let out a “whoa” the moment the performance ended. In the completely silent auditorium, they couldn’t help making such a sound. Doesn’t that mean they were that deeply focused on the performance?

So it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say it was a performance excellent enough to completely captivate viewers.

And that wasn’t all.

“Plus, I actually thought you were amazing from the start.”

“From the start?”

“Yeah.”

When So-yul asked, I nodded lightly.

Then, after catching my breath briefly:

“From the beginning… when we first met at the walkway bench.”

So-yul’s shoulders jumped slightly.

This must have been unexpected.

“I could feel how much you loved piano, enough to come out at night and pretend to play. And when I said something ignorant about it, you got angry and corrected me.”

Would I ever get upset if someone badmouthed studying? But So-yul was different. When I spouted nonsense about piano without knowing anything, So-yul got seriously angry. It meant she was always sincere about piano.

“In the piano room too. Seeing you perform up close, I felt your ‘piano prodigy’ title wasn’t given for nothing. It was fascinating, and kind of surprising.”

That’s why I blankly watched So-yul’s performance. This even led to her teasing me.

“When you played piano over the phone, I even felt my loneliness dissolving.”

Though at first I wondered why she suddenly called, as I listened I actually felt my lonely feelings dissipating.

It was a day I thoroughly felt how So-yul’s performance could touch people’s hearts.

“Working hard to get your parents’ approval even studying for tests you barely need. Of course practicing piano diligently too. Yesterday being so nervous you couldn’t sleep despite being tired. So, uh, well, um.”

My thoughts became confused and awkward filler words attached to the end. I saw a loose smile form at So-yul’s lips.

“So, I know everything. How you felt, preparing for this arts festival, I saw it all…”

So, what words should come next?

What was the conclusion to this long speech?

In the first place, what did I want to say?

Though I thought hard, only this came to mind:

“I just… don’t want you making such a sad expression.”

Just saying don’t make a sad face.

After giving your absolute best, after showing an incredible performance, after receiving tremendous cheers and applause from the audience, ending up with a sad face. Could there be anything more pitiful in the world?

So I wanted to affirm it.

That she deserved to be happy… as much as she’d given her best, as much as she’d completed an excellent stage, as much as everyone had clapped saying she was amazing.

Of course, how So-yul would take it was unknown.

After catching my breath briefly, I checked So-yul’s reaction.

So-yul held her head high, staring at me intently. Not moving her mouth or body, truly frozen in place. Everything was the same as usual, but her cheeks were tinged with a light rose color.

I’d said everything I needed to say. Now I could only wait for So-yul’s answer. I too kept my mouth closed and just met her gaze.

After quite a long silence passed like this.

Finally, So-yul’s lips slowly opened:

“…I see.”

So-yul let out words that were hard to interpret.

Then soon covered her mouth and smiled brightly. Was she laughing at my words to tease me? Or was she smiling because I told her not to make a sad face?

Well, either way, I was glad she seemed to feel somewhat better. Just for today, I wouldn’t mind even if she teased me endlessly.

Soon So-yul lowered her hand that had been hiding her smile.

A faint shy smile remained at her lips.

“Thank you. Hearing that makes me feel stronger.”

“Does it?”

“Yeah.”

So-yul nodded big and flashed me an eye smile. Finding it hard to face that directly, I awkwardly avoided her gaze.

As I did so, So-yul spoke softly:

“But hey. Can I ask you one thing?”

“…What is it?”

What was there to ask? Everything I’d just said was just my impressions. Could there be anything to question?

Still looking away, I waited for So-yul’s question.

Then after a moment, in a somewhat amused voice, So-yul asked:

“Why are you trying so desperately to comfort me?”

The moment she asked this, my breath caught.

Why had I tried so desperately to comfort So-yul?

Because I didn’t want to see her sad face. Because I hoped she’d smile after showing such an incredible performance. These feelings definitely existed inside me.

But then, why did I dislike seeing So-yul’s sad face?

What emotion lay at the root of this?

Maybe it was empathy from having lived as a model student too. Maybe I felt pity seeing So-yul not receive proper reward for all her hard work.

Maybe I was angry seeing So-yul’s parents not acting like proper parents. Though somewhat presumptuous, maybe I meant to tell her she didn’t need approval from such parents.

No.

Perhaps actually…

Only after hearing So-yul’s question did I feel like I properly looked into my heart.

I clearly felt emotions I’d denied and hidden suddenly raising their heads.

Even I knew well what to call this.

But these feelings could never be spoken aloud.

The moment I did that, I’d cross a line I could never return from.

Therefore.

Ridiculously, I had only one answer to give:

“Because I’m your boyfriend.”

So-yul’s body trembled at my answer.

Her already large eyes opened even wider as if surprised.

Then soon she replied with a gentle smile:

“But… it’s fake.”

The words I always said to her, this time So-yul returned them to me.

Then my answer too was predetermined. Straining my throat, I voiced the sentence echoing in my head:

“Even if it’s fake, I’m still your boyfriend.”

Brief but clearly spoken words.

The moment I said this, So-yul looked at me and started giggling.

Well, it couldn’t be helped. I’d copied the exact repertoire she’d used countless times. Even I who said it felt like laughing.

But this too didn’t last long.

Soon So-yul closed her eyes tight and took several deep breaths. When she opened them again, she’d changed to her usual playful expression. Meeting my gaze, she even tilted her head.

Then putting her hands behind her back, she showed a bright smile.

“Okay.”

After responding in a delicate voice, So-yul’s lips moved silently for a moment as if stalling, then:

Lifting her head to gently look up at my face:

“…I’ll believe that excuse.”

She gave this answer.

As if she’d seen right through my true feelings.

“Mmm~ Well then, I should go to the after-party now.”

As if trying to change topics, So-yul said this while stretching.

Come to think of it, I’d forgotten she had plans. This was the arts festival after-party that happened once a year. I hoped I hadn’t needlessly prevented her from going.

“Sorry for keeping you.”

“What are you saying? I’m so grateful.”

So-yul answered with a huhu laugh at my cautious apology.

Fortunately, it seemed I hadn’t just wasted her time. Her bright smile even made my chest feel warm.

“Ah, want to watch me change clothes?”

My mood turned cold.

“Are you crazy?”

“Why?”

“What do you mean why…”

Seeing her say such nonsense, it seemed the usual So-yul had finally returned. At this point, it actually made me feel more at ease.

As I thought this, So-yul cleared her throat with a few coughs then:

“Even if it’s fake, aren’t you my boyfriend?”

“…”

“Hehe.”

So-yul giggling mockingly at me.

Really, her talent for teasing others was remarkable. When I hung my head unable to endure it, So-yul maintained her amused tone and said:

“Anyway, starting tomorrow I’ll think about what bad things to do next. Look forward to it.”

“I’ll worry about it.”

“Yeah. Wait with half expectation, half worry.”

Her concerning words made me sigh automatically.

“Well then, I’ll go now. See you tomorrow.”

“Right. Have fun.”

“Yeah!”

Raising one arm high as she answered, So-yul soon strode toward the changing room.

Her steps looked extremely cheerful, as if musical notes might pop out with each footfall.

After blankly watching her back, I too turned around and walked away.

As I left the backstage area like this.

Though very late, I pondered So-yul’s question from earlier.

The question of why I tried so desperately to comfort her.

And after considering the answer, I finally realized, albeit belatedly.

No, perhaps I’d noticed it myself long ago.

Though I pushed it away, pretending not to know, claiming I just enjoyed the thrill of dangerous situations, insisting it was just savoring the pleasure of breaking rules.

In the end it was all pointless.

Before I knew it.

It seemed I’d developed real feelings for my fake girlfriend.