Chapter 23: Day Before the Arts Festival

After our messy fake date full of close calls, So-yul and I hadn’t met up separately.

So-yul was busy with arts festival practice, and I didn’t want to distract her with our rule-breaking games.

She’d mentioned how crucial this arts festival was – a perfect chance to prove herself to her parents.

Given that, it seemed right not to waste her time. She’d held back from meeting when I was busy with exams, so I was just returning the favor.

Still, we saw each other every morning in our shared classes.

Every day when I entered the classroom, So-yul would turn to look at me.

Though unlike before, she wouldn’t smile or wave.

When I’d give her a slight nod in greeting, she’d just make a “hmph” sound and look away.

I had no idea why she was acting this way.

Time kept moving forward regardless.

Monday afternoon, the day before the arts festival.

They’d called helpers to attend rehearsal, so I dragged myself to the auditorium despite finding it bothersome. Once again, there was absolutely nothing for me to do.

Some helper I was – just checking attendance and handing out pamphlets. They could’ve just called us on the actual day.

As I stood there grumbling to myself, a voice called out nearby:

“Oh? Min Woo-jin? Long time no see.”

Who was it? The voice was familiar but hazy. Only when I turned to look did I recognize her – a girl from my first-year class.

Though we were in different classes now, we were still in the academic track, so I’d expected to run into her occasionally. But somehow we hadn’t met once this year. It really had been a while.

“Oh, yeah. Long time no see.”

When I raised my hand in greeting, she turned to face me directly. Then she started looking me up and down like she was scanning me. What was this about?

Finally finished with her inspection, she spoke:

“Your impression has changed.”

“Really? What’s different? I guess I grew taller.”

“You were already tall before. That too, but…”

She touched her chin thoughtfully, then:

“How should I put it… you seem more relaxed overall.”

“More relaxed?”

“Yeah. Last year you always looked like you were being chased by something.”

What kind of expression was that supposed to be? Was I rolling my eyes around looking for escape routes? However I interpreted it, it didn’t sound like a compliment.

“Was I like that?”

“You were.”

She answered lightly, then clapped her hands and laughed heartily. She seemed completely unaware she might have said something rude.

But well.

Though I questioned whether I’d really always looked haunted last year, I was definitely more relaxed now compared to this time last year.

Many things had influenced this change, but clearly the biggest factor was…

Just then, I spotted So-yul behind my friend.

So-yul was on her tiptoes, peeking at me over my friend’s shoulder. When our eyes met, she gave me a thoroughly sulky glare.

What did I do wrong?

But this didn’t last long either.

So-yul dropped back down and sharply turned her head away. She headed toward the backstage area where arts festival preparations were in full swing. I noticed she was holding a water bottle. Had she just come out to get water?

As I watched her walk away, my friend wrapped up our conversation:

“Anyway, good seeing you. I just came to drop something off for a friend. I should go.”

“Oh, right. Take care.”

“Yeah. See you around.”

My friend left with a light smile. Well, I wasn’t sure we’d actually see each other again.

So apparently I’d changed enough for others to notice a difference in my impression.

I’d felt it myself, but hearing it from someone else made it feel more real. The comment about seeming more relaxed hit particularly close to home.

Maybe… following the predetermined track wasn’t always the right thing to do.

Lost in these thoughts, my phone suddenly buzzed in my pocket.

Checking it, I saw a KakaoTalk notification.

I read the message:

[So-yul: Tonight, bench.]

As always, she was completely forceful about it.

◎

That night when I went to our usual bench, So-yul was already sitting there.

“You came.”

“Yeah, because who knows what you’d do if I didn’t.”

“Hmm~”

Making this sound, So-yul quietly looked up at me.

I couldn’t read what emotion was in her gaze. Maybe assuming there was any deep meaning was a mistake to begin with. Deciding not to think too hard about it, I plopped down on the bench.

“So? Why’d you call me?”

When I asked softly, So-yul snorted and:

“Just because I saw you chatting with a girl, so I got upset.”

“I can talk to girls sometimes…”

Wait, why was I muttering excuses? Talking to girls was perfectly normal. I chatted with them regularly. There was no reason not to be confident about it.

Snorting as if reassuring myself, I counter-attacked instead:

“What? Are you jealous?”

But So-yul didn’t back down at all:

“Yeah. I’m jealous.”

“What?”

“My boyfriend was talking to some girl I’ve never seen before. As your girlfriend, shouldn’t I be jealous?”

“Ah… no.”

I was at a loss for words.

Though So-yul and I were playing lovers, it was all just to rebel against the school. There was no need or reason to feel jealous.

Obviously.

Getting jealous seeing the other person talk to someone of the opposite sex… that was something real couples did.

Caught off guard, I hesitated for quite a while.

Watching me closely this whole time, So-yul soon covered her mouth and giggled.

“I’m kidding, kidding.”

“…Oh really.”

Well, it was my fault for taking it seriously. Looking at So-yul laughing with narrowed eyes, I let out an audible sigh.

Soon after putting away her laughter, So-yul said:

“Actually, I called because we haven’t met in a while. You haven’t even asked to meet first.”

Then she pushed out her lips playfully.

“Such a bad boyfriend, really.”

“No, why am I bad? I didn’t call because I knew you were busy practicing for the arts festival.”

“What? Is the arts festival more important to you? Or is love more important?”

“Neither is particularly important.”

“…Tch.”

Not getting the answer she wanted, So-yul sharply turned her head away.

It’s not like I was performing in the arts festival. And I wasn’t really dating So-yul either. Neither could be particularly important. I had no idea what answer she’d been hoping for.

But well, looking at So-yul’s condition, I felt I’d made the right choice not calling her.

So-yul looked extremely tired now. Dark circles hung heavily under her eyes. Even in the dim moonlight, I could clearly see how bloodshot her eyes were.

She must have accumulated fatigue from practicing repeatedly while cutting into sleep time.

Yet even the night before, she’d gone out of her way to call me out.

As always, I just couldn’t grasp what was going on in So-yul’s mind.

Crossing my arms, I said:

“The arts festival is tomorrow, isn’t it? Wouldn’t it be better to sleep early and take care of your condition?”

“I want to.”

“But?”

When I prompted with a chin gesture, So-yul fidgeted with her fingers and:

“I’m worried I might mess up tomorrow, so I can’t sleep well.”

That was her answer.

She was so nervous she couldn’t sleep despite looking this exhausted. And this was So-yul, who must have performed in front of audiences hundreds of times. It seemed hard to believe.

As I nodded slowly, So-yul continued explaining:

“I’m performing last at the arts festival. The grand finale role. If I make any mistakes, it’ll bring shame to the school’s name.”

“Don’t you hate the school?”

“Even if I hate the school, I’m still a member of it. I should do my best not to make mistakes.”

So-yul replied in a sharp tone.

What an upright personality. Well, even if I were in So-yul’s situation, I wouldn’t deliberately try to ruin the performance either. In that sense, it was quite a normal mindset.

Then So-yul briefly added:

“Plus… Mom and Dad are coming to watch.”

Though she tacked it on like an afterthought, this was probably her true concern.

The pressure to prove herself to her parents. The responsibility not to damage the school’s honor.

Carrying all of this on such a small frame, no wonder it was difficult. I might have thrown it all away long ago if it were me.

I was starting to understand why So-yul, who acted the perfect model student, would suddenly change so much as to suggest breaking rules in secret.

But either way, the conclusion was the same. When the body is tired, it becomes harder to perform at full capacity. If she couldn’t sleep due to worrying about mistakes, she might actually end up making mistakes.

Suddenly a weak breeze blew past. I saw the walkway’s tree branches swaying gently.

Ignoring it, I leaned back on the bench and whispered:

“Still, you should sleep.”

At the same time, So-yul’s shoulders suddenly trembled.

“Wh-what?”

So-yul looked completely flustered. That in turn flustered me. Was suggesting she sleep really that strange? It seemed like an unnatural reaction no matter how I thought about it.

“What?”

“Ah, no. Even so…”

Was she saying her mind was too complicated to sleep even so? Even then, I meant she should get proper rest. Had she misunderstood?

As I blankly waited for So-yul’s answer, for some reason she slowly started moving toward me. Fidgeting her body, moving slower than a turtle.

Then she gently leaned over and…

Softly rested her head on my lap.

For a moment I couldn’t process what had happened.

The soft, ticklish sensation felt through my pants. The warm feeling spreading throughout my body from where we touched.

It took quite a while to accept the fact that So-yul was using my lap as a pillow.

In my bewilderment I could barely move my lips.

I didn’t know what to say, and even if I did, no voice would come out. Beyond that, I could barely even breathe properly.

As I sat there frozen, So-yul turned her head to look up at me.

She was biting her lower lip hard as if trying to hold something back.

After a moment, So-yul mumbled almost inaudibly:

“It’s… comfortable though…”

What on earth was she saying?

“Wh-what are you doing?”

“What do you mean? You said ‘sleep’ while showing your lap…”

“No…”

Apparently there had been quite a misunderstanding. Putting my hand to my forehead, I explained:

“I meant… it would be good to get some sleep.”

“Wh-what?”

When I conveyed my actual intention, So-yul just blinked for a long while. She seemed to need time to process the current situation.

Then.

“Ugh…!”

In an instant, her entire face turned bright red.

“Ah, no! I thought you were doing something boyfriend-like, unlike your usual self…”

“As if I’d do that. We’re not even really dating.”

“Uu, uuu… I did think it was strangely unlike you.”

Grumbling complaints, So-yul glared at me with tears in the corners of her eyes and:

“Take responsibility, dummy.”

She threw out this line trying to shift the blame.

No, this was completely unfair to me. In this situation, wasn’t So-yul the dummy? Who in the world would interpret my words that way?

Besides, we’d known each other for quite a while now. How did she still not know I wouldn’t do something like this?

…Though well.

If she didn’t hear properly because of the wind, I could understand. If anything was my fault, it was whispering to avoid being caught by the security guard.

Plus, it wouldn’t be good to make an enemy of So-yul right before something important.

Who knows where the arrows might fly if things went wrong? Given that we held each other’s weaknesses, we needed to be even more careful. No telling what might happen if I got on her bad side.

Right. That was the reason. There were no other particular feelings.

After repeating this in my heart several times, I scratched my unnaturally itchy nape and moved my lips:

“Alright. …If you insist, go ahead and lie down to sleep.”

“What?”

A questioning look flew from the startled So-yul.

When I deliberately looked away, So-yul asked suspiciously:

“Really?”

“Yeah. Because if you make any mistakes tomorrow, you’ll probably come after me saying it was my fault.”

“What kind of person do you think I am?”

So-yul pretended to be angry, then:

“But well.”

Soon after, with a shy smile:

“…I’ll gratefully borrow it then.”

What did she mean ‘borrow’.

She never missed a chance for an amusing comment. Unable to help it, I let out a small laugh.

The breath scattered on my neck must have tickled, as So-yul’s shoulders trembled slightly on my lap.

And so, So-yul and I ended up spending time in this somewhat embarrassing position.

Neither of us knew what to say, so we couldn’t even speak a single word to each other the whole time.

Before long, the sound of steady breathing came from below.

Though it was hard to confirm with her face turned away, she seemed to have fallen asleep quickly.

For someone who said she couldn’t sleep from worrying about tomorrow, she sure fell asleep easily.

Looking down at So-yul’s sleeping profile, I thought:

Both So-yul and I were doing something completely ridiculous.

Where exactly should the line be drawn with a fake girlfriend?

With these thoughts weighing on my mind, I faced the day of the arts festival.