Chapter 20: Poison – 3

A long and grand dining table placed in the middle of the vast hall.

Vivian, sitting alone at the end of it, looked like a stranded duck floating in a wide river.

The simple but carefully prepared meal in front of her remained untouched.

Even the fragrant aroma rising from the food could no longer stimulate her appetite.

This had been happening lately.

Her gaze towards the food was empty, and only a deep void filled her heart.

Vivian picked up the fork, then weakly set it down again.

The space surrounding the table was too large and too silent.

The family portraits hanging on the wall were still elegant, but those family members had long since left her side.

Every time she looked at the smiling faces in the portraits, the warmth and love from the times they were there painfully resurfaced.

Those memories had now become her pain, making reality even more barren.

It had been half a year since her mother, the last one to stay by her side, had passed.

During that time, she had been busy trying to restore Rondor, the family legacy, keeping her occupied.

…But no matter how much time passed, meal times never became easier.

Being alone in this moment was always dreadful.

Meals had always been a time for the family to gather, with conversations and laughter never ceasing.

Her father, smiling as he chatted with her mother.

Her brother, sternly cutting food for her and telling her to eat more.

Vivian had loved that scene.

But now, all of that had vanished, leaving behind nothing but a deathly silence.

The silence flowed along the vast walls, closing in on her, and within it, Vivian was consumed by loneliness.

Would this pain ever end?

Whenever things got tough, Vivian always recalled the provocations of Kailo Alan.

She remembered his words, insulting her family, saying that weaklings like them were destined to lose.

Last time, provoking him during the execution was a kind of whim.

She couldn’t leave him alone, pricked by her conscience.

But whenever meal times came around, she regretted that choice.

In her moments of loneliness, she resented the Alan family more than anything.

Her conscience or whatever it was—maybe she should have just left things alone.

Vivian sighed and quietly tore off a piece of bread, placing it in her mouth.

Rondor, which her father, mother, and brother had sacrificed their lives to protect, was now her responsibility.

Lately, the desire to restore the family out of sheer resentment had grown within her.

If she couldn’t, all this suffering would be meaningless.

But even so, sometimes, she closed her eyes and imagined.

She wished for someone to sit next to her.

A gentle hand stroking her hair, a warm voice calling her name.

Someone to listen to her everyday stories and empathize with her.

Then, maybe this moment would be a little more bearable.

Lately, she heard the whispers of the maids.

They envied her, inheriting the vast territory of Loctana.

They said, wasn’t all the prosperous land of the South hers?

Perhaps they were right.

Maybe there wasn’t a fourteen-year-old girl who had more than Vivian.

But even though she had more than anyone, she was missing the most important thing—someone to be with.

Vivian finished her meal without even eating half of the food.

She couldn’t eat any more.

Not only did she lack appetite, but even a sip of water felt unbearably heavy as it passed down her throat.

Eating alone in that silent room wasn’t just about filling her stomach.

It was torture—a confirmation of her loneliness.

And she desperately wanted to escape from it.

At that moment, Sena, the maid who had been quietly standing by, approached Vivian.

She hesitated for a moment before trying to perform her duty.

Lowering her voice, the maid spoke gently.

“…Lady Vivian, you’ve eaten too little. It will harm your health. You should eat a bit more, don’t you think?”

Vivian slowly lifted her gaze to look at the maid.

“It’s fine, Sena. I can’t eat anymore.”

Maid Sena hesitated.

Her unusual concern seemed to reflect Vivian’s current state.

Indeed, Vivian could feel it herself.

Day by day, she was eating less and less, and now even the flesh on her limbs was starting to disappear.

Vivian knew her body would weaken, but she felt as if any more food would just come back up.

“But Lady Vivian…”

“Then… shall we, eat together?”

Vivian asked, responding to Sena’s continued urging.

Only after she said that did Sena awkwardly step back.

“How could I…”

“I, I’m saying it’s fine.”

“…I’ve already eaten.”

“J-just a little more.”

Sena did not respond in the end.

Vivian knew why.

Lately, no one was willing to stand by her side.

It was like a balancing act.

No one wanted to grab onto the rope that was Vivian.

Vivian could see as clearly as a field of flowers under the sun that factions were forming as time passed.

No one wanted to appear too close to her, lest they get caught in something.

If she gave them an opening, she might keep asking them to join her for meals.

Of course, not all factions were hostile towards her, and some were just too busy looking out for their own interests.

But either way, the option of siding with Vivian wasn’t all that appealing.

Understanding this, Vivian snorted softly.

Then she rose from her seat.

“…Sorry, Sena. It was a foolish request.”

Sena couldn’t respond, her face merely flushing red.

Leaving the embarrassed maid behind, Vivian started to exit the hall.

“…Huh?”

She hadn’t taken more than a few steps before the world spun around her.

***

-Tap, tap.

I tapped the back of my pocket.

Out of habit, I checked if I had the charcoal powder I had prepared there.

It had been years since I’d ground the charcoal I received from Gulk at the forge and carried it with me.

The advice to be careful with food was losing its weight as time passed, but… since it was a matter of life and death, I couldn’t entirely ignore it.

Recently, I’d been loitering near Vivian’s castle rather than staying at the punishment unit’s barracks.

My desire to find that maid I’d seen before was stronger than anything… and I couldn’t shake off the suspicion that had taken root in my mind.

It all started with Wallace’s words.

‘So, this parade is meant to firmly establish who the head of Rondor is among the people of Loctana?’

An event to announce the head of Rondor.

It was the same thing our family sometimes did—to reinforce the responsibilities and authority of the ruler.

Vivian was scheduled for that parade soon.

It meant she was going to solidify her position as the head of the family.

And just as that parade was approaching, I received a mysterious note.

It said to be careful with the food.

That’s when a certain hypothesis occurred to me.

What if the warning wasn’t for me?

What if it was a request to protect Vivian?

If there was indeed an enemy targeting her, aiming to take her place—or refusing to acknowledge her as the head of Rondor—then eliminating her before the parade would be the most efficient strategy.

After all, once she showed her face to the people, acting against her would become far more complicated.

Was now the perfect time for Vivian’s enemies to make their move?

Of course, this was all just speculation.

It was a baseless thought.

Assuming the note wasn’t a prank, it was still absurd that the information had been passed to me.

Why ask me of all people?

There must be plenty of people better suited to help Vivian.

It was like the duchess herself had asked me to protect Vivian, a ridiculous request.

I clicked my tongue lightly.

The more I thought about it, the less it made sense.

Even if Rondor had fallen apart, poisoning the head of the family was—

“Quickly! Quickly!!”

That’s when I heard the sound of the castle maids and guards running somewhere.

Dozens of people were shouting urgently as they dashed about.

I stood there blankly, and as I grasped the situation, my mind went white.

What had happened?

I felt like I could guess.

As that thought hit me, my body was already in motion.

I cast aside all complex thoughts, my legs already moving swiftly.

I must have thought a hundred times over that what I feared wouldn’t come to pass.

Perhaps I was hoping it wouldn’t.

I ran after the maids and guards towards the great hall of Rondor Castle.

It was where Vivian always ate her meals alone, nibbling at her food in solitude—a scene I had witnessed countless times.

And the fact that people were gathering there now made my mood sink even lower.

There were already so many people crowding the hall.

I pushed through the tightly packed adults blocking the way like a wall and moved forward.

“Lady Vivian! Lady Vivian!!”

Urgent cries echoed from beyond the crowd.

The more desperate the voices became, the faster I moved.

-Smack!

At last, I broke through the crowd and entered the hall.

And there she was.

Her red hair was disheveled, her complexion pale.

“Hah… Hah…”

Drooling, she gasped desperately for air.

Clutching her throat in agony, she clung frantically to the maid’s clothes.

Around her, a large number of people stood helpless, unsure of what to do, too busy shouting over one another.

One maid called out.

“G-get Scholar Crellin quickly…!”

“Scholar Crellin left this morning to gather herbs…!”

Someone else spoke.

“I-I’ll pat her back…! Ah, ah, what should I do!!”

“I’m patting her back…!”

Someone else again….

“The antidote…!”

“How can you ask for an antidote when we don’t even know what poison it is!!”

I couldn’t believe what was happening.

There were so many people gathered, yet not a single one could help her.

No, looking closely, some didn’t even want to.

There was a guard simply watching for cues.

A maid was backing away, disappearing into the crowd.

The soldiers were watching with frightened expressions, frozen in place, while knights who should have acted only moved their mouths, urging others to spread the news quickly.

The crowd was filled with those busy trying to calm their pounding hearts.

No one stepped forward to help, and no one took responsibility for the situation.

It was a chaotic scene where everyone waited for someone else to act.

And in the midst of it all, Vivian was left alone.

Her eyes scanned the people gathered around her, as if she still had some consciousness left.

“Gasp…! Gasp!”

It didn’t take long for the desperate flicker in her eyes to be tainted with despair.

Just as I could see it clearly, she too must have seen it.

There was no one here who truly wanted to save her.

The only ones present were people who didn’t want to take responsibility for this incident.

If she had been more loved by her family, would this have happened?

It might just be my imagination, but it felt as though there were many who hoped this incident would lead to a change in the head of the family.

Realizing this, Vivian’s breathing grew shallower, as if she were giving up.

“Gasp… Huff…”

The strength in the hand gripping her throat gradually faded.

Even tears flowed from her red eyes, spilling in the most pitiful way, somewhere between despair and surrender.

The last flame of Rondor was dying out like that.

It was then that I couldn’t hold back anymore and approached her.

“Move…!”

I pushed aside the maids who had been uselessly patting Vivian’s back and took a place beside her.

The crowd gasped, as if they couldn’t believe I had stepped forward.

Considering the relationship between me and Vivian until now, it was a natural reaction.

But there wasn’t time to think about that. I put my hand on the shoulder of the kneeling Vivian.

Her wavering eyes, which had seemed to have given up, slowly turned toward me.

Had we ever been this close before?

Only when I got this close did she, who had been struggling to breathe, recognize my presence.

Her gaze changed at last.

There was an emotion that was conveyed even without words.

Having spent months locked in a silent battle of wills with her, I understood better than anyone.

Even in the face of death’s fear, she was, after all, just a girl.

Her eyes, forgetting the resentment between us, were now filled with raw, vivid fear.

“Bring water!!”

It was so painful to look into those eyes that I turned my head and commanded the maids.

Only after I made the decision did they start to move busily.

Soon after, I looked at Vivian.

Why can’t I just leave Vivian Rondor alone?

Vivian’s enemy had attacked her from the shadows.

It was a signal that the war within the Rondor family had begun.

If I managed to save her, I would be dragged into that war as well.

I couldn’t save her and then back out later.

Logically, I knew how inefficient this all was.

Why was I going through this trouble for someone like Vivian, who hated me so much?

But just as sure as my actions were inefficient, there was one thing I knew for certain.

Even if I didn’t understand the reason or the process that led me to this conclusion… there was one thing I was sure of about my own heart.

It was something I could finally admit now.

I wanted Vivian to live.

That was one unwavering truth.

Whether she had lost hope in life and despaired, whether she was struggling, or even now.

I wanted to see her grow up into an adult alongside me.

I didn’t know why I felt this way, or why I had to do this.

But now, I was determined to protect her.

If I stuck to this principle, I felt like I wouldn’t regret it later.

If I had made up my mind a little sooner, would Vivian have avoided drinking the poison?

Was it because I hesitated, watching from the sidelines, that things turned out this way?

…I didn’t know the answer, but there was no time to think about it now.

I had to focus on fixing what had gone wrong.

I gripped the back of Vivian’s neck to steady her and looked directly into her red eyes.

‘Don’t die, please’

… It wasn’t the time for awkward words like that.

If I said that, she would probably only doubt my sincerity.

So I changed my words to make her understand more clearly why I was helping her.

“…Where do you think you’re going, trying to die without permission?”

“Gasp… Huff…”

“You promised to watch how I grow, didn’t you? Where are you running off to?”

I moved closer to her, wrapped my arm around her shoulder, and supported her against me.

Then, using my right hand, I pried open her weak mouth.

For the first time, I felt the soft, wet texture of her tongue.

And then, her teeth bit down on my fingers rather fiercely.

As if she couldn’t stand having my hand force its way into her mouth.

But that was only for a moment.

“You can’t die yet.”

With those words, the strength in her jaw gradually weakened.

“If you die here… that would be far too boring.”

As her teeth released my hand, I reached further into her throat to induce vomiting.

I turned her head to the side so that nothing would block her airway.

“Ugh!!”

Vivian tightly closed her eyes, retching.

Tears gathered at the corners of her squinting eyes.

“Ugh!!”

Struggling to breathe while vomiting, she seemed to be in even more pain.

With each retch, the color drained from her face.

But I had no intention of stopping.

I mercilessly, without any care, moved my hand to force her to vomit.

I didn’t care if everyone saw her in such a disgraceful state.

For now, she had to survive so that I could feel at ease.

In the meantime, the maids came running with a basin of water.

I handed them a pouch of charcoal powder from my back pocket.

“Dissolve it in the water. Then prepare a cup for her.”

“Y-yes!”

They followed my instructions and began preparing the charcoal water.

Seeing this, I spoke to Vivian.

“From now on, Rondor, until you drink every last drop in that basin, you’re going to drink and throw up over and over again.”

“…”

“Even if you don’t want to, I’ll force it down your throat, so don’t resist. Got it?”

Vivian looked up at me.

Her gaze was unfocused, as if she were dizzy.

“Do you understand…!”

As the poison’s symptoms worsened, I grew more anxious, and I raised my voice…

-Nod.

Vivian nodded in agreement.

My desperate heart eased slightly.

With her consent, I took a cup of the charcoal water from the maid.

“If you can’t see, feel it. I’m bringing the cup to your lips. Drink it all.”

Vivian leaned against me.

Despite her dizziness, she slowly opened her mouth.

As I tilted the cup, she began to drink the water with difficulty, gulping it down.

Her hand gripped my sleeve tightly.