Chapter 16: What if?

Jeong Semin, once an average, unremarkable high school boy, now stood on the precipice of adulthood. His life revolved around his perpetually mid-level manager father, his supportive mother, and two siblings with whom he shared a cordial but not particularly close relationship. With the looming pressure of the college entrance exam, Semin found himself adrift, lacking direction and struggling to find his place.

“I’m off,” Semin mumbled, the weight of expectation heavy on his shoulders.

“Oya, my son! Do your best on the exam! Don’t let yourself be intimidated by comparisons to your brother, okay?” His mother’s cheerful encouragement, a daily ritual designed to bolster his spirits, often fell on deaf ears. Unlike his gifted older brother, Semin’s efforts rarely yielded the desired results.

“Heehee, I’m off,” he replied, a forced smile plastered on his face.

“Son, want a ride?” His father, whose work commute aligned with Semin’s school route, often offered a lift. The long commute was a consequence of Semin’s reluctant pursuit of a culinary arts high school specializing in coffee brewing, a path chosen more out of obligation than genuine passion.

“Just hurry to work, Dad. Don’t whine about being late again like yesterday,” Semin retorted, their easy banter a testament to their close bond. Perhaps it was his position as the youngest child, or maybe they simply clicked.

“My little brother’s off to school… Work hard today…” His older sister, currently unemployed, offered a languid farewell. While his brother toiled away in graduate school, his sister’s entrepreneurial dreams seemed perpetually stalled.

Beep

Semin sighed, the reality of his social standing settling upon him like a shroud. He was, in his own estimation, a loser. His chosen major held no real interest for him, and his focus on the college entrance exam had alienated him from his classmates.

He trudged along, the prospect of another school day filling him with dread.

Thwack

“Oof!” Semin stumbled, the unexpected impact knocking him off balance.

“Hey, Jeong Semin!” A familiar voice called out.

Semin looked up to see Hyeji, his closest friend since middle school, and his only real confidante. It was Hyeji who had planted the seed of his cafe franchise dream, a vision that now seemed distant and unattainable.

“What’s wrong? You look down. Are you on your period or something?” Hyeji teased, her bluntness a hallmark of their close relationship.

“What, no! Are you crazy!?” Semin flushed, flustered by her insinuation. Their bond was so close that they shared almost every secret, and he held a deep respect for her. Hyeji, an only child, treated him like a sibling.

“Then what’s up? A man can’t be bleeding… Pfft…”

“Just… I don’t want to go to school,” Semin admitted, the words heavy with resignation.

Hyeji was a multi-talented individual, excelling in everything she pursued. Even during her period or when feeling unwell, she remained composed and focused, a picture of unwavering perfection.

“Come on, I told you not to be like this! You need to study hard to get into a good university so you can open an even better cafe!” Hyeji scolded, her words tinged with concern.

“Shut up,” Semin muttered, the familiar refrain of their playful banter.

Hyeji’s dream was to become a chef, a shared aspiration that had led them to the same high school. In truth, Semin had followed her there out of a lack of other options and a fear of being alone.

“Smile when you get to school, okay? You’re doing great!” Hyeji’s unwavering optimism was both endearing and frustrating.

“Ugh, you’re so annoying. I’m doing fine, you old lady!” Semin grumbled, but her presence had undeniably brightened his otherwise dreary commute.

They reached the school gates, their paths diverging as they headed to their separate classrooms. The brief respite from his loneliness ended, leaving Semin to face the drudgery of another school day. He struggled to focus, his mind wandering back to the world of coffee, a realm where skill and passion seemed more valuable than academic knowledge.

“Hey, loser!”

Thwack

The sharp sting of a slap jolted Semin from his reverie.

“Ouch! Why is everyone so eager to hit me?” he groaned, rubbing the sore spot.

“Lighten up! Stop moping around with your nose in a book all the time!” The boisterous voice belonged to Tae-yeon, the athletic girl of their group. While she lacked a specific career aspiration, her love of movement and activity was infectious.

Flick

“Ow!” Semin yelped as a sharp flick landed on his forehead.

“You’re here,” a quiet voice murmured.

Yura, the quiet and seemingly introverted girl, emerged from behind Tae-yeon. Despite her reserved demeanor, Yura possessed a knack for forging connections and had a wide circle of friends. Her diminutive stature and cute features also played a part in her popularity.

“So, are you playing basketball today? It’s boring without you,” Tae-yeon whined, her usual energy subdued.

“Basketball… Let’s play,” Yura agreed, her soft voice barely audible.

Yura and Tae-yeon’s pre-existing friendship had naturally extended to include Semin. Yura often tried to coax him into joining their athletic pursuits.

“No, I have to study,” Semin protested, his excuse met with a knowing smirk from Tae-yeon.

“Says the guy who got completely crushed by me on the finals.” Her words hit their mark, leaving Semin speechless.

“Two points…” Yura chimed in, adding insult to injury by referencing Semin’s dismal mid-term math score. She then raised a thumb, a gesture that felt like pouring gasoline on a fire.

“Nice one, Yura.”

“Nice,” Yura echoed softly.

Just like that, another school day began.

Thud

As class commenced, a small paper airplane landed on Semin’s desk.

‘Teacher’s wig is obvious again today.’

Semin glanced up, confused. He turned to look at Tae-yeon, who was seated diagonally behind him, stifling a giggle. He then looked at the teacher, whose wig was indeed askew, tilted at a noticeable angle. Semin burst out laughing, earning himself a stern reprimand and a summons to the teacher’s office after school.

“You jerk!” Semin hissed at Tae-yeon.

“What? It’s your fault for laughing… Hehehe!” she retorted, still chuckling.

Lunchtime arrived, bringing with it Semin’s usual digestive urgency. He made a quick trip to the restroom. In his classroom there was a gift and a letter waiting for him upon his return.

“Didn’t see them again?” Tae-yeon asked, oblivious to the mysterious benefactor.

“When did this get here?” Semin replied, surprised by the unexpected present.

Neither Tae-yeon nor Yura seemed to notice the gifts, and Semin’s attempts to catch the anonymous admirer by remaining at his desk during lunch had been unsuccessful. The gifts, always meticulously wrapped and accompanied by a love letter filled with generic compliments, continued to appear, mysteriously placed in his locker when he wasn’t around.

“See, I told you someone’s trying to confess to you!” Tae-yeon exclaimed, her voice laced with excitement.

“Maybe spring is coming for our little loser,” Yura added, a rare smile playing on her lips.

The elaborate packaging and heartfelt, albeit somewhat formulaic, letters puzzled Semin. He couldn’t fathom why anyone would have a secret crush on him.

“I’m taking this!” Tae-yeon declared, reaching for the gift.

“No, it’s mine!” Semin protested, snatching the package away.

“Come on, share!”

A nagging suspicion lingered in Semin’s mind. Were they after his organs? He made a mental note to be cautious if the admirer ever suggested meeting.

The school day ended, and Tae-yeon and Yura headed home.

“Bye, loser! See ya!” Tae-yeon called out.

“See you,” Yura added quietly.

Semin, however, was stuck with detention for his earlier outburst in class.

“Ugh, what a pain,” he muttered, annoyed at the unnecessary punishment.

As he was leaving the teacher’s office, he realized he had left his workbook in his desk. He turned back to retrieve the classroom key, but it was missing.

“Who was on duty today?” he wondered, trying to recall the assigned student. He headed towards his classroom, hoping to find the key.

Click

The door opened, revealing an unexpected sight.

“Huh?” Semin and Hyeji stared at each other, surprise etched on their faces.

“What are you doing here?” Semin asked, his mind racing. He had been meaning to ask Hyeji why she had been making him wait at the subway station lately.

“Uh… uh!? No, no!? Why, why…?!” Hyeji stammered, her flustered response only deepening Semin’s confusion.

He approached his desk to retrieve his workbook.

“Hey…” he began, but Hyeji stepped in front of him, blocking his path.

“What are you doing?” Semin asked, perplexed by her unusual behavior.

“Uh, uh!? No, no!” Hyeji’s evasiveness grew more pronounced, her hands fidgeting nervously.

“I need to get my workbook. Move,” Semin insisted, his patience wearing thin. He couldn’t understand why Hyeji was acting so strangely.

But then he noticed something familiar in her hand. A piece of stationery. The distinctive heart-shaped stationery that always accompanied the anonymous gifts.

“Hey, you…” Semin’s voice trailed off, realization dawning on him. The overly flustered demeanor, the presence in the empty classroom, the stationery… it all pointed to one conclusion.

“Uh, uh!?” Hyeji’s eyes darted around, her cheeks flushed crimson.

Semin’s mind reeled. He couldn’t believe it.

“Are you… going to harvest my organs?” he blurted out, the absurd question escaping before he could stop it.

“What…?” Hyeji’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Why would you think that? Can’t you imagine that I might… like you?”

“Well, you’re really pretty… You’ve been called the class beauty a few times…” Semin began, trying to rationalize his earlier assumption. “You have a great figure, a good personality, good grades, amazing self-discipline… You’re practically perfect in every way… And you’re rich…”

As he listed Hyeji’s qualities, Semin paused, struck by the absurdity of praising her to her face. Then, it hit him.

“Wait, if you’re rich, why would you need to steal organs?” he asked, the question hanging in the air.

He looked at Hyeji, her face now a vibrant shade of pink, and the truth finally sunk in.

“Hyeji… You…” Semin’s voice was barely a whisper.

Hyeji’s blush deepened, spreading to her ears.

Semin was dumbfounded. He felt like an insignificant pebble compared to Hyeji, a polished gem. Why would someone like her be interested in him?

“Do… you like me?” he asked cautiously.

It was December 23rd. The air was cold, their breath misting in the chilly air. While countless couples prepared for Christmas celebrations, Semin found himself facing an unexpected confession.

Hyeji stood silently, her blush deepening.

“You idiot…” she finally muttered, her voice barely audible.

Semin’s mind raced. The waiting at the subway station, her constant chatter… it all made sense now.

“So, the reason you kept making me wait, the reason you kept talking to me…”

“I would have ignored you if I wasn’t interested, you idiot!” Hyeji retorted, her voice gaining strength despite her embarrassment.

“So… I…” Semin stammered, unsure how to proceed.

“Ask me out, Jeong Semin!” Hyeji burst out, her patience finally snapping. “Don’t you get it, you idiot!? I want to go out with you! I want to date you!”

Hyeji, the girl he had always admired from afar, the girl who seemed so out of his reach, was confessing her feelings for him.

Semin was speechless.

“If you don’t ask me out soon, I swear…! Ask me out! Okay!? Let’s date!” Hyeji’s voice was a mix of exasperation and desperation.

Doubt gnawed at him. Could he make someone like Hyeji happy? He felt like such an insignificant pebble in comparison. He was terrified of starting something beautiful only to see it end badly.

“I’m sorry, Hyeji,” he said quietly.

Hyeji’s eyes filled with tears. “You… jerk…” she whispered, her voice choked with emotion.

“And thank you,” Semin continued, his voice firm. “Thank you for liking a useless pebble like me. Thank you for caring about me.”

Hyeji’s tears continued to flow, but she remained silent, listening intently.

“So, from now on…” Semin’s voice was filled with newfound resolve.

He wanted to reciprocate the gifts, the letters, the feelings she had so freely given.

“Would it be okay… if I cared about you too?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.

Hyeji’s tears flowed even faster, but this time, they seemed warmer, less tinged with sadness.

“Even if I’m just a stupid pebble… I mean something to you, right…? You jerk…” she sobbed, throwing herself into his arms.

Semin stood frozen, his arms instinctively wrapping around her. It was the first time he had held a girl like this. He had hugged his sister and his mother, but this was different. This was a hug filled with a different kind of emotion.

And his heart…

Thump, thump, thump, thump

… was beating like a drum against his ribs.

He could hear another heartbeat beneath his own, a softer, steadier rhythm.

Hyeji’s heartbeat.

Her arms tightened around him, her hands trembling slightly.

Semin gently returned the embrace, his own hands shaking.

“You idiot…” Hyeji whispered, pulling back slightly. She unwrapped her scarf and looped it around Semin’s neck.

“This is yours now, jerk,” she said, a small smile playing on her lips. “My padding is yours too. My clothes… everything.”

Then, with a sudden burst of energy, she threw her arms around him again.

“Now I’m yours too, Jeong Semin!” she exclaimed.

Semin’s voice trembled as he spoke.

“I’m… yours too,” he whispered.

Hyeji buried her face in his chest, her cheeks burning.

“You sly fox… You sly dog…” she muttered, her voice muffled.

Hand in hand, they walked out of the school, the cold air no longer biting.

“Do you really…” Hyeji began, her voice quiet, “…like me?”

Semin looked at her, his heart still pounding in his chest.

“There’s no one who wouldn’t like you… but…” he said, his gaze shifting to the street. He placed a hand over his racing heart. “I don’t think anyone likes you as much as I do… I can’t even compare it to anyone else…”

Hyeji stopped walking and looked at him. She tightened her grip on his arm.

“I love you!” she declared, her voice clear and strong. “I love you so much, Jeong Semin! Marry me!”

“W-wait… My heart is beating so loud, I can’t hear anything else,” Semin stammered, flustered by her sudden declaration.

Hyeji beamed, her eyes shining with happiness.

“I don’t care! You’re going to marry me someday! You got that!?” she exclaimed, her joy infectious.

“Ugh…” Semin groaned, his energy draining away.

Despite the playful banter, Semin felt a wave of happiness wash over him. This Christmas Eve Eve was unlike any he had ever experienced.

Christmas arrived, and while their celebrations were subdued due to his inexperience and nerves, they shared a quiet intimacy, studying together at Hyeji’s empty house, stealing kisses and enjoying each other’s company.

Time continued to march forward, bringing with it the arrival of the New Year.

“Hey there, honey~!” Hyeji greeted him, her voice dripping with playful affection.

“Hey… Hyeji,” Semin replied, his heart still fluttering at the sound of her voice.

They found themselves alone again, thanks to Hyeji’s parents’ New Year’s trip.

“Yura and Tae-yeon have no idea~ How happy we are together~!” Hyeji chirped, her words laced with a smug satisfaction.

“Do you think they really don’t know? I feel like they’re pretending not to notice,” Semin replied, skeptical of their friends’ obliviousness.

It was 11 PM on December 31st. They lay snuggled together under a warm blanket, watching a movie on Hyeji’s phone.

“Nope, they have no clue~ We’ve never been caught~” Hyeji insisted, her confidence unwavering.

“Really? Are you a ninja or something?” Semin teased, marveling at her ability to avoid detection.

They basked in the warmth of each other’s presence, the comfortable silence punctuated by the occasional whispered comment.

“It’s almost New Year’s… We’re going to watch the sunrise, right?” Hyeji asked, her voice drowsy.

“Do you think we’ll be able to stay awake?” Semin replied, his gaze drifting towards the bottles of liquor and beer he had snuck from his father’s stash.

Hyeji smiled, her eyes twinkling mischievously.

“Happy New Year,” she whispered as the clock struck midnight.

They had made it. Another year had passed, and together, they had ushered in 2023.

“Aw, I missed the countdown! It’s your fault, Jeong Semin! You kept distracting me!” Hyeji complained, her playful pout failing to mask her happiness.

“Oh, I distracted you, did I?” Semin asked, his voice laced with a playful suggestiveness.

Hyeji blushed, her ears turning pink. Semin watched her, momentarily taken aback by her uncharacteristic silence.

“Hyeji?” he asked, concerned.

“You… idiot,” she finally muttered, then suddenly pushed him onto the bed.

“We should have done this on Christmas! I was waiting…” she continued, her words a mix of playful reproach and anticipation.

“W-wait, Hyeji… I’m not ready…” Semin stammered, his mind reeling.

Hyeji ignored his protests, her fingers deftly unbuttoning his shirt.

“Just stick your tongue out,” she commanded, her voice husky.

Semin’s lips parted in surprise as Hyeji’s mouth covered his.

His fingers traced the curve of her back, his touch hesitant.

“I heard… it hurts…” he whispered, his voice filled with concern.

“It’ll… be okay,” Hyeji murmured, her eyes filled with a passionate intensity.

Their first time together, fueled by alcohol and a shared desire, was a new and exhilarating experience.

“Ah…” Hyeji’s soft moans filled the room.

Semin paused, concerned by her sounds of discomfort, but her soft, pleading eyes urged him on.

“I love you… Semin…” she whispered, her voice filled with emotion.

“Me too…” Semin replied, his heart overflowing with love.

They held each other close, their bodies intertwined, their hearts beating as one.

****

Semin watched Hyeji sleep, her face serene and beautiful. Even in slumber, her lips moved, softly murmuring his name.

He thought about how much he loved her, how she had changed him.

“I could die for you… or kill for you…” he whispered, the words echoing the depth of his feelings.

He had become a different person because of her.

“Jeong Hyeji, you sly fox…” he murmured, a fond smile playing on his lips.

He gently kissed her forehead, his heart swelling with love.

As sleep claimed him, he dreamed of their future together, a future filled with love, laughter, and a lifetime of shared moments.