Chapter 140: Children Who Had to Grow Up (6)

[140] 22. Children Who Had to Grow Up (6)

Looking back, it was always like that. The boy always stayed in the shadows. He would huddle there and watch the people outside.

That did not change even after he arrived here, so at some point, the boy ceased to consider leaving the shadows.

That was probably why.

“S-sister, are you sure this is alright? Shouldn’t I just go back…”

“Zip it and just hold my hand tight. Put on the saddest face you can. This older sister will take care of everything.”

“Ah, no, but still…”

“Quiet! Don’t you trust your sister? No, just trust your sister!”

The moment the boy stepped out of the shadows,

The moment the warm sunlight fell upon him,

That was when the boy became utterly terrified.

Dressed neatly for probably the first time in his life, the boy is dragged along by Amy’s hand. Gradually, beyond the hill, Sir Sinclair and his wife’s house starts to come into view.

Sir Sinclair and his wife were already standing at the entrance. They waved at Amy with smiles like those in a painting.

“Mom! Dad!”

Amy, beaming brightly, leads the boy forward. His pale face flutters about like a flag.

And finally.

“Mom, Dad, this is Rem. Go on, say hello, Rem!”

The boy, who had only ever watched from the shadows, was now standing outside them.

“…So you’re that boy named Rem.”

Sir Sinclair was the largest person the boy had ever seen. Even five of him put together probably couldn’t match that build.

He reached out his hand toward the boy. He was likely about to pat the frightened child on the head.

But to the boy, a hand coming down from above meant violence.

“Hiek…!”

The boy flinches, thinking Sir Sinclair is about to hit him. He looks up at Sir Sinclair with terrified eyes.

“…”

“…”

That moment of awkward silence.

“Haha… Rem, what’s wrong? Is something bothering you?”

Amy awkwardly laughs and pulls Rem into a hug. Making sure Sir Sinclair can’t hear, she whispers into his ear.

“Rem, it’s okay. That sucker isn’t like that. Calm down.”

“So, sorry…”

Yet, Rem’s complexion does not improve. He can barely steady himself as he approaches Sir Sinclair.

“I-I’m sorry. I, I just…”

“There’s no need to apologize.”

Sir Sinclair shakes his head and then kneels down in front of the boy. Not only that, but he also bends his waist to meet the boy’s eyes.

Then, with a smile, he extends his hand to the boy.

“I was thoughtless. It’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is Franz Sinclair.”

The boy froze for a moment before realizing Sir Sinclair was offering a handshake. And… that was a first for the boy.

Someone was asking to shake his hand as an equal, at eye level.

“I, my name is Rem… It’s a pleasure to meet you too…”

The boy takes Sir Sinclair’s hand as if in a trance.

***

Mrs. Sinclair brought out a meat pie for the children. It was a pie larger than any Rem or Amy had ever seen.

But sadly, it was not the best choice of dish.

“Uh… Um…”

The boy looks at the fork and knife in his hands as if they were some strange, unfamiliar device. As if a user manual would appear in the air if he just stared at them hard enough.

Fortunately, he wasn’t the only one having that experience.

“Here, relax your hand.”

Amy steps behind the boy and takes hold of his arms. Clumsily, as if controlling a puppet, she moves them around.

“Now, like this…”

Not only does Amy cut a piece of the pie, but she even feeds it to the boy.

A smile naturally appears on Sir Sinclair’s face as he watches. However, that smile vanishes the moment he looks at his wife.

“So, Rem.”

Rem, who was clumsily eating the pie with Amy’s help, shudders. Even seeing Sir Sinclair’s gentle smile, he can’t help shrinking back.

“Do you know why I asked you to come here?”

“That… you’re going to adopt me…”

Sir Sinclair nods. He glances at Amy then continues.

“If it’s alright with you, our family is ready to welcome you at any time.”

The hunched boy lifts his gaze to check Sir Sinclair’s expression. Then he sneaks a look at Amy as well.

“That’s… I…”

“Father.”

It was a strangely blunt tone.

Sir Sinclair’s eyes turn quizzical as he looks at Amy.

“Could you step out for a moment, please? So Rem and I can talk.”

“…Right, he’ll need some time to think.”

Sir Sinclair rises without complaint and takes his wife out of the room. At last, only the boy and Amy are left in that spacious kitchen.

Amy gives Rem a sly grin, as though she’s been waiting for this.

“See, didn’t I tell you they were total suckers. They’ll agree to anything I say?”

The boy only smiled awkwardly, not knowing how to respond.

But how could an older sister not notice her little brother’s discomfort.

“So tell me. Why were you about to turn them down just now?”

The boy doesn’t jerk his shoulders as though he’s been hit right on target. He merely lowers his gaze.

“Why, don’t you like them? Or maybe you don’t like the food?”

“It’s not like that, Sister. I just…”

The boy turns his head to look around the room.

The interior of Sir Sinclair and his wife’s house is as ideal as its exterior. Warm wooden furniture and neatly organized dishes. It’s a scene that would only appear in a fairy tale illustration.

Because of that, it feels suffocating.

“…I don’t know if I belong here.”

Human beings are creatures of adaptation. Whatever environment they find themselves in, they somehow adapt and survive.

But adaptation is another word for assimilation.

To a boy who has lived his entire life in the shadows, how unfamiliar and unsettling would the world under the sun be.

He stammers his words, fumbling for excuses.

“And, and… if there are more mouths to feed, then it’ll become a burden to them. And if that burden grows too big, then they might abandon both of us. So, it would be better if just sister…”

“Rem.”

Amy’s hand cups Rem’s cheek. Gently, yet firmly, she turns his head to face her.

Amy’s eyes were burning with a desire uncharacteristic of a child.

“This is our chance to finally live like humans. No more getting beaten, no more stealing, no more empty stomachs. We have a chance to finally live like other kids our age.”

“…I know, but…”

“But without ‘us,’ it doesn’t mean anything.”

Amy strokes Rem’s cheek with her thumb.

“It doesn’t have any meaning if it’s not *both* you and me. If it’s not *us*, then it’s pointless.”

The boy probably learned the sweetness of the word ‘us’ from Amy. An emotion, both joy and embarrassment, weighed on the boy’s mind.

“And you’re asking if you belong here? Rem, I’m here, aren’t I. Are you trying to become independent from your sister? Already? How dare you?”

Amy laughs teasingly as she ruffles the boy’s hair. Then she pats him on the back and smiles.

“Rem, you really overthink things too much. Go outside for a bit and clear your head. I’ll explain everything to those suckers.”

“That’s…”

“Ehei, tsk! Are you going to disobey your older sister?”

Amy makes a deliberately fierce expression. Of course, the boy doesn’t feel even a sliver of threat from her.

The boy simply nods obediently like a good little brother.

“…Alright.”

The eastern sky had been a bright red when they first arrived here. But by the time the boy stepped outside, it was already soaked in the dark blue of night.

Gazing at the gradually appearing stars, the boy wanders through the brush.

Maybe Amy was right. Maybe the boy is about to lose the opportunity of a lifetime, all because of needless worries.

In truth, when you think about it, such fortune is almost unheard of. He finds this place too unfamiliar and uncomfortable, so he dislikes it? Is he really going to kick away this luck over something so trivial?

All he has to do is close his eyes and nod his head. Then, the boy might finally get his hands on the happiness he’s only been able to watch until now. He may no longer be an orphan that no one wants.

Isn’t that what he’s been longing for his entire life?

“…I’m just not sure, Franz.”

It was when he was almost at the back door of the house, that a worried voice suddenly caught the boy’s attention.

It was Mrs. Sinclair’s voice, coming through the window on the back side of the house.

Without realizing it, the boy crouched down below the window. He pressed his ear against the wall and listened to their conversation.

“We already agreed to this.”

“Yes, I know, but…”

Mrs. Sinclair lets out a soft groan. The boy could feel the fear hidden within it.

“Amy is already our daughter. Not a substitute, or a replacement for our deceased daughter Catherine, but our *real* daughter.”

“…Yes, that’s right.”

“But Rem, that boy… goodness, did you see his body?”

“…He’s covered in scars.”

The boy rolls up his sleeve and looks at his arm. It’s an arm that seems to have every kind of injury a human can have. Mottled with traces of new skin, bumpy and lumpy from infection.

Gifts from his mother in the previous world, and from the orphanage director in this one.

“What a pitiful boy he is. If anything, that means we should embrace him all the more, right?”

Sir Sinclair’s sympathetic voice drifts through the window. However, Mrs. Sinclair’s anxious voice follows right behind it.

“But… can you think of anyone in this world who would do such a thing to a child for no reason at all? Surely the child must be partly to blame for ending up that way, no?”

“My dear! Are you being serious right now?”

“I don’t know, that boy just seems so strange to me. Dear, didn’t you see him sneaking looks around all the time? How he kept his head down and only moved his eyes, constantly checking us and the inside of the house.”

That was true. But contrary to Mrs. Sinclair’s assumption, it wasn’t anything sinister. The boy was merely frightened.

But the heart cannot be seen. Only actions can.

And actions often bring misunderstanding.

“Franz, I’m not sure if I can love that boy like I do Amy.”

“Have faith, my dear. I’m sure the two of you will get along just fine. It’s simply a little awkward because it’s your first meeting.”

“But what if we don’t. What if I can never become close to that child? Or worse, what if that boy turns out to be a bad child?”

Silence flows through the window. The sound of the night wind singing could be clearly heard in that stillness.

“Don’t worry, my dear. I have a plan for that.”

Finally, it was Sir Sinclair’s voice that breaks the silence.

“I have a friend who raises children. An honorable and proud soldier, you see. If there are any problems with that boy, I can simply entrust him to my friend.”

“But then what about Amy? We’re adopting him solely for Amy’s sake. Amy said she wouldn’t have it any other way…”

“We just need to persuade her well. And even if he becomes a soldier, he’ll still carry the Sinclair name. If he becomes a proper soldier, he might be able to return.”

“Well, that would be acceptable, but…”

“Let’s leave it here. After all, neither of us knows a thing about him yet. Let’s get to know this child first, then talk and decide. There’s no rush.”

“…You’re right, Franz. It’s just… I’m so anxious…”

“I understand, my dear. I really do.”

Then there’s a faint sound of rustling clothes, likely the two embracing. Footsteps follow, as they leave the room.

However, even though he could no longer feel their presence in the room, the boy didn’t get up. He simply remained crouched on the ground, staring at it.

Actually, the contents of their conversation weren’t that shocking. If anything, it was rather cliché.

Taking in an orphan, one they’re meeting for the first time, can hardly be easy. Mrs. Sinclair wasn’t a bad person. She’s simply fearful.

The problem lay in the fact that the boy, who is twice as fearful as she is, had stumbled upon their conversation.

It is then that the boy realizes his own excuse.

Until now, he believed he shouldn’t be here because he didn’t fit in. He thought his inability to adapt to a place like this was what created his sense of rejection.

And of course, that wasn’t a lie. But it was only part of the truth. It was simply that there was a deeper, more potent reason.

[Mommy will be right back, so stay here. Okay, Seojin-ah?]

The boy didn’t want to be abandoned again.

He didn’t want to be taken into a family’s arms once more, only to be cast into the army or something similar on the grounds that he couldn’t be loved.

Even if the chance of that happening was very small.

It’s only natural for someone who’s been badly burned by fire to avoid getting close to it.

He staggers to his feet, though no sudden tears fall from his eyes. He merely takes a few steps toward the cottage, then looks back over his shoulder.

Through the window, he could see Amy sitting on a chair, swinging her legs. Just then, Sir Sinclair and his wife enter the kitchen and embrace Amy. The smiles lighting all their faces are nothing but warmth.

An enviable, yet terrifying sight.

During those sleepless nights, while Amy dreamed while looking at the stars, the boy wished for the present while looking at the ground.

Was it already set in stone back then, that their paths would diverge.

The boy listlessly walked back to the cottage where he belonged.

“Rem!!”

At least, he did, until he heard that voice.

At what point did she notice? In bewilderment, the boy watches Amy rush toward him from the house. She closes the distance in a flash, grabbing him by the shoulders.

Amy’s trembling blue eyes capture the boy’s somber face within them.

“What is this, why, why are you leaving?”