Chapter 12 – I Came to Defuse This Bomb

“Well, I thought it would be awkward, but it’s not too bad.”

From the moment I sat down at the company dinner, I wasn’t comfortable. I tried to force a smile among the staff and senior actors, but I felt strange gazes on me from somewhere.

Is it because I’m a parachute hire?

That thought crossed my mind. The director said it definitely wasn’t the case, but I couldn’t stop the thought from surfacing.

What should I do?

After a moment’s consideration, I made a decision.

It’s probably better to just go along with everything unconditionally.

You’d have to experience social life to know. For a real-life newbie like me, a company dinner was too burdensome. Too overwhelming to act with my own personality. So I decided to just go along with everything unconditionally.

At times like this, I should be more proactive.

With that thought, I actively joined conversations and moved with the atmosphere. After a brief awkwardness, a smile kept spreading across my face.

“Junho! Let’s talk together.”

A senior actor approached me. I reflexively nodded and tidied up my seat.

I checked the face of the senior actor who spoke to me. Lee Jeonghan, a veteran senior actor who took on a villainous supporting role like me. He plays Kwon Hyeoksu, a cold-blooded businessman supporting the copycat in <Continuous Nightmare>. And he’s the first person to be killed by Jo Danseok later.

“Hello, senior.”

“Ahaha! It feels good to be greeted by our scene-stealer. But where have you been hiding until now! I fell head over heels for our Kang actor’s performance!”

Senior Lee Jeonghan’s face was starting to flush red. Usually, he had a calm and neat impression, but as alcohol entered his system, his cheeks and nose tip were holding a warm glow. His eyelids looked slightly heavy, and his eyes were subtly blurred. But he still held a mischievous smile on his lips.

“Pour me a drink. I want to receive a drink from a future Daesang-winning actor.”

“You’re too kind, senior.”

I tilted the soju bottle with both hands. The shot glass Senior Lee Jeonghan was holding filled up and rippled.

Senior Lee Jeonghan lightly raised his glass and slowly swirled the soju inside. His eyes were full of mischief.

“Oops, the glass is full. I’m in a good mood today, receiving so much, Junho.”

He downed the alcohol in one gulp, then smiled again. His face was already flushed, and as the alcohol hit, his cheeks reddened even more. Letting out a light sigh, he narrowed his eyes at me.

“Still, it’s rare to find an actor with as much talent as you among the newcomers these days. You know I have high expectations, right?”

I humbly smiled and bowed my head.

“Thank you, senior. I still have a lot to learn.”

Senior Lee Jeonghan nodded and responded to my words.

“No, no. I’m not just saying this. It’s rare to find such a standout actor among juniors these days. You’re going to make it big, Junho.”

I bowed once again at his compliment. In fact, I still wasn’t used to receiving praise in such settings. But Senior Lee Jeonghan’s sincere compliment eased my heart a little.

He turned his head for a moment to speak to other seniors. It was a brief moment for me to catch my breath. The surrounding staff and senior actors were becoming boisterous with laughter and conversation.

But the more this happened, the more a strange tension within me wouldn’t ease.

When will I feel comfortable in this setting?

I kept going along with the atmosphere, but it didn’t feel completely natural.

It’s probably better to just go along with everything unconditionally.

The seniors’ laughter grew louder, and the dinner was reaching its peak. I was holding my glass, looking around for the right timing.

At that moment, Senior Lee Jeonghan turned to me again and said a word.

“Junho, if there’s something you should be careful about… adapting appropriately is a skill too. But don’t lose your own color. In acting, and in places like this too.”

I was momentarily stunned by his words. It was advice I hadn’t thought of before. It was a moment that made me reflect on my attitude of just trying to adapt.

“Yes, I’ll keep that in mind, senior.”

Senior Lee Jeonghan raised his glass and smiled.

“Junho, today’s a day to celebrate, so just relax and enjoy. You acted well. You must have been nervous for your first filming, but it didn’t show at all. So there’s something I want to do.”

He picked up a soju bottle from the table and shook it.

“Shall we have a drink for our future great actor?”

I pondered for a moment at those words. The warning Park Taeseong and Kim Seol always gave,

‘You absolutely must not drink when we’re not around! No matter what! Got it!’

No matter what I asked, they never gave a proper answer. And I had no way of knowing because I always blacked out when drinking. Moreover, my heart was leaning towards accepting the drink.

Well, it’s not a big deal to have a few drinks on a day like this.

I thought lightly. I politely raised my glass.

“Then it would be my honor, senior.”

“Uahaha! Good! Our Kang actor is so open-minded! Alright, let me pour the first drink of today. To our future top actor! No, to our future Daesang winner!”

He laughed heartily and poured soju until the glass was almost full. I lightly downed the alcohol. The characteristic bitter alcoholic flavor brushed past my throat.

I felt a warmth spreading through my body. It wasn’t too bad.

I awkwardly smiled and raised my glass.

“You’re too kind, senior. I still have a long way to go.”

The senior lightly shook his head and responded to my words.

“Ah, enough with the modesty. Successfully finishing your first filming, that’s what’s important. Today, we should have a comfortable drink to celebrate successfully finishing episodes 1 and 2. Come on, let’s have another drink in celebration!”

Along with the sound of clinking glasses, bright laughter and words of congratulation were exchanged around the table. My heart lightened at the seniors’ praise.

That’s right, today is a day I did well.

Holding my glass and smiling, I started to naturally blend into the atmosphere.

As the conversation continued, I started to feel more comfortable bit by bit. At first, I was just listening, but at some point, I was naturally participating in the conversation. As I entered their stories, it seemed like they were accepting me more comfortably.

“Junho, you’re adapting faster than I thought! I thought you were a bit nervous at first!”

A familiar voice tickled my ear. It was Director Cho Makdun.

“Not at all. It’s all thanks to the seniors.”

As people surrounded me, laughing and exchanging jokes, I started to get more deeply involved in the conversation. I didn’t lead the conversation, but I naturally blended in by asking questions or agreeing with the flow. That’s when Senior Nam Gungmin approached with a bottle of alcohol.

“Junho, you should have a drink! To celebrate properly adapting as a newcomer today.”

I waved my hands, smiling as if flustered.

“Ah, senior. I’m a bit weak with alcohol…”

I’ve already had some drinks too. Senior Nam Gungmin raised the bottle, smiling playfully.

“Come on, just one drink. A newcomer should do this much. The seniors might be disappointed.”

As he winked slightly and joked, I nodded with a smile.

I guess I can’t avoid it.

Thinking that in my heart, I held out my glass.

Everyone around was watching the situation, making laughing sounds.

Have I really been accepted as a newcomer now?

A slight smile formed at the feeling of lightness in my heart. Clear soju being added to the glass. I downed the alcohol.

It wasn’t as light as before.

I’m dizzy.

Am I starting to get drunk? Heat rises to my face and my mind becomes hazy. When I lightly touched my cheek, it felt like a well-heated hot pack.

“But. Where had you been hiding until now, Junho? With such outstanding skills. It seems like it would be hard to hide.”

“Ah, about that…”

I opened my mouth unconsciously. Drunk on the alcohol, I smiled foolishly. Unlike the words I was about to say.

“My parents both passed away in a traffic accident when I was in elementary school, so I suffered from mental illness. That’s why I couldn’t watch movies or dramas. Hehe.”

At that moment, Nam Gungmin’s eyes, who had spoken to me, lost their way and shook. His lips trembled and his fingers tapped the air.

“Huh?”

“Because of that incident, I couldn’t even speak properly. Even though I wanted to act, I wanted to speak. So I gave up on my dream of becoming an actor. Uh, did the doctor call it aphasia?”

I set off a nuclear bomb with a foolish smile. Nam Gungmin felt his mind going blank as he felt the gazes pouring on him.

Was I trash? I just asked out of curiosity. Nam Gungmin looked at Kang Junho with trembling eyes. Even while hiccupping from drunkenness, he doesn’t stop talking. He wanted to bring duct tape right away and cover his mouth, but the weight of the words, no, the pain, pressed down on him. Is this the end?

Terror. Kang Junho, smiling brightly like an innocent child while casually talking about his trauma, looked like a grim reaper. Like a grim reaper socially executing people.

“Ah.”

At that moment, everyone realized. That this was the funeral for Nam Gungmin’s acting career. But heroes appear in times of chaos. The door of the BBQ restaurant swallowed by silence opened. A blue-eyed beauty with flowing white hair walking in. Someone known by everyone not just in Korea, but worldwide, Korea’s best current female singer. A person with a god-given voice who pushed two songs to #1 on the Billboard chart.

“This is Kim Seol.”

Kim Seol descended upon the BBQ restaurant.

Footnotes:

1. Company dinner: In Korean culture, these are often called “hoesik” (회식), and are an important part of work culture where coworkers socialize and drink together.
2. Daesang: The highest award given at year-end award ceremonies for Korean entertainment, similar to “Best Picture” or “Best Actor/Actress” in Western award shows.