Chapter 119: Confinement – 4

Vivian fiercely chased the maid out.

When everyone had left and it was just the two of us in the room again, Vivian tidied her silky hair and turned to look at me.

“Do you find it fun to scare people like that?”

I asked her.

Vivian responded with a clueless expression.

“…Fun?”

At the same time, she sat down at the small vanity table next to the bed and continued what she had been doing before the maids entered.

We were in the middle of dinner.

…Of course, I wasn’t eating.

“Do you think I’m doing this because I’m bored, Kailo? I was genuinely angry just now.”

I let out a scoff.

“…All because I exchanged a single glance?”

“If I handle it well enough to convince you, wouldn’t that stop you from looking at other women?”

“…Would you gouge out my eyes to make sure of that?”

Vivian smirked at my words, her expression almost unreadable.

“Then you wouldn’t be able to see me anymore.”

“…But I’m happiest when you’re looking at me.”

Having completely freed herself of restraint, Vivian spoke without hesitation, relentlessly expressing her honest feelings.

She was still shy and often blushed, but… her words came out nonetheless.

Even embarrassing confessions like saying she was happiest when I looked at her came easily to her now.

Yet, she never uttered the word “love.”

She never said I was precious to her, even if her silence on the matter had become peculiar.

“Vivian, you’re not normal.”

“When were we ever normal?”

She wasn’t wrong.

But that wasn’t what I had meant, and she knew it.

“…If you’ve had enough fun, let’s stop here and let me go. What could you possibly gain from all this?”

She sighed in exasperation, almost laughing.

“…Kailo, do you still think this is a joke?”

No, it didn’t feel like a joke.

But I couldn’t accept watching her walk so proudly down a path of ruin.

If she stopped now, she could still salvage everything.

I finally said what I had been holding back.

“…Maybe you’re doing this because you’ve never met another man. Someone other than me—”

—Clang!

Vivian, who had never reacted emotionally to anything I said, was visibly shaken by the words signaling the end of our connection.

She set her utensils down and whispered.

“…Do you think another man could get hurt for me like you have?”

“Could they… love me even when surrounded by malice? Could they accept me when I had nothing?”

Vivian looked at me.

“The men who come running to me now, claiming they want me… they only see what I’ve achieved. They see me as the ruler who restored Rondor and made Loctana prosper again. None of them see the stammering, broken girl I used to be.”

“From the moment I met you, you were the one who stayed by my side. The only one who truly accepted me. Do you even realize what kind of salvation that was for me?”

“…I find your current behavior revolting.”

I said.

Vivian smiled.

“Don’t lie to me, Kailo.”

Was it a lie?

Even I began to doubt myself under her unwavering gaze.

“Kailo, feelings don’t work the way words do. Even if you want to hate me… you can’t. Just as I can’t hate you.”

“…I’ve told you over and over—it’s because of a curse.”

“You say that, but you’re not entirely sure yourself, are you?”

“You can call it a curse all you want, but I know the truth. It’s not a curse. You simply love me… and that truth is what sustains me.

Even when I show you such an ugly side of myself, your unwavering heart… I’m grateful for it.”

I sat there with a scowl, and Vivian gently touched my cheek, as if handling a precious treasure.

Her hand moved with such care, as though afraid I might shatter.

She stared at me for a long time before speaking again, almost as if trying to justify herself.

“…But Kailo. I didn’t have any other path. In my cruel world, you’re the only light. How could I ever let you go? Are you asking me to live the rest of my life in misery?”

Thinking of her being left alone hurt me, too.

But I couldn’t let that fear keep me chained here.

“If I disappear, you’ll find something else to make you happy.”

“If something like that existed, it should’ve appeared in my life long ago.”

Vivian’s voice was firm.

“When I was trembling in fear and begging for help, who stayed by my side? You were the only one who came running for me.”

After saying that, she prepared food again.

A fragrant soup, perfectly roasted meat, and a glass of cool water.

“Eat, Kailo.”

As she had been doing all along, Vivian persistently tried to feed me.

But once again, I shook my head.

It would be ridiculous to complain about being imprisoned while willingly eating the food she offered.

How many days had it been?

Around ten now?

Despite her efforts to feed me three times a day, my consistent refusals were wearing her patience thin.

“…You’re testing my limits.”

“…Kailo, if you could see inside my mind, you’d know how much I cherish you.”

As much as I refused to eat, Vivian also refused to eat.

That weighed on me more than anything.

But guilt alone wasn’t enough to make me yield.

“…You should eat.”

Her eyes flared with frustration at my words.

—Clang!

She slammed her utensils down and leaned in close, staring into my eyes with exasperation and anger.

“Do you want to starve to death, Kailo?”

“That doesn’t sound so bad.”

“…Do you have to push me away this much?”

Fueled by her irritation, I responded.

“…It’s time to give up, Vivian.”

“Ha… Kailo…”

She roughly swept back her falling hair and whispered.

“…No, it’s fine. If you make it this difficult, I like it even more. This is who you are. Alright, let’s fight today.”

Vivian picked up her spoon again and put a piece of cut meat into her mouth.

However, her gaze never left me.

Thud!

Suddenly, Vivian lunged at me as if to tackle me.

“Ugh!”

My upper body was pushed back, and I fell over.

Vivian straddled me, looking down at me.

Her eyes were filled with a dangerous glint, a mixture of earlier irritation and anger.

Swoosh.

In an instant, she pinched my nose, blocking my breath.

I slowly began to understand her intentions.

With a devilish smile, Vivian bent down and pressed her lips against mine.

She smiled with her eyes, waiting for my mouth to open.

For a while, we exchanged gazes.

Countless conversations passed between us through our eyes.

I asked if this was truly necessary, and Vivian provocatively raised her eyebrows, insisting it was.

As my breathing became constricted, I reluctantly opened my mouth.

At that moment, Vivian opened hers, her moist tongue pushing food into my mouth.

Then she froze, covering my mouth completely, not allowing me to spit it out.
She also refused to let go of my nose, as if demanding I breathe only through her shared breaths.

Her tongue delved deeply into my mouth, preventing me from clenching my teeth, holding me there until the food passed down my throat.

“Haah…”

Cough!

Cough!

Only after I swallowed the food did Vivian sit up with a satisfied expression.

She repeated this a couple more times.

In the end, I realized that as long as she was willing to get dirty herself, I could never beat her.

I finally said to her.

“…Stop it now.”

But Vivian shook her head.

“No.”

“I won’t let you off just because you surrender. This is fun. You should’ve listened to me when I was being nice.”

Vivian kept putting food into her mouth, chewing it, and then kissing me.

Her frustration, anger, and irritation seemed unresolved, as she continued this behavior like she was venting.

From her actions, I could tell her day hadn’t gone smoothly.

She seemed to be using me to release all the tension of her day.

Until the meal prepared by the maids ran out, Vivian kept repeating the same behavior.

***

A few more days passed, and the day before Vivian’s birthday arrived.

The preparations were already complete.

The castle was lavishly decorated, reflecting her dignity and influence.

This celebration, centered around Vivian, was more than just a party; it symbolized unity and peace.

It was planned to last not just one day but several.

Nobles from both the Kingdom of Delrum and the Eastern Kingdom were attending the event, thanks to Lady Linne’s meticulous efforts.

Yet, despite the castle’s splendid decorations, Vivian’s heart was endlessly dark.

As time passed, her feelings grew increasingly tangled.

Vivian lay on her bed, gazing at Kailo, who was sound asleep.

Throughout their long-standing conflict, Vivian had gained nothing.

Kailo’s unwavering resolve showed no signs of breaking.

The strength in his character, once so reassuring when it was on her side, had now become the most suffocating shackle.

Vivian knew that simply confining him wasn’t enough.

Further steps were necessary.

Even though impulsiveness had driven her to restrain him, she thought she could somehow change his mind.

Her belief rested on Kailo’s love for her.

Vivian could still feel it.

Even if he was angry and tired of her, the love underlying it all hadn’t faded.

His unyielding will extended even to the love he held.

Vivian caught glimpses of concern and affection in his occasional looks, no matter how subtle.

But Kailo, even while carrying that love, still tried to leave her.

His determination hadn’t wavered.

This only made Vivian more anxious.

What if his resolve never changed, not even in a lifetime?

What if he left with love in his heart and never returned?

What if he left her as a mere memory of the past?

What if he ultimately built a family with another woman?

That was a future that couldn’t be allowed to exist.

The mere thought was unbearable, her chest tightening with pain.

Vivian couldn’t deny that her actions since restraining Kailo had been impulsive.

But who wouldn’t act the same in her position?

With no one to judge or punish her…

Who could endure having someone they love bound to them without trying every possible way to keep them?

Even for someone with only a mild affection, an ordinary person would attempt countless things to keep their loved one close.

Yet, Vivian’s feelings were far beyond mere affection.

Even so, she had held herself back this much.

But now, her patience was wavering.

As her anxiety grew, the bubbling frustration inside her reached its limit.

She was certain she couldn’t change Kailo’s mind before the banquet tomorrow.

She knew a future was coming where she would have to hide him even from the guests’ eyes.

…She had hoped to dance with him this time.

But that, too, was becoming an impossible dream.

Vivian had learned to dance solely for Kailo.

She had envisioned the romantic moments they would share together.

But now, even that time seemed destined to fade into futility.

If Kailo’s heart never broke, that would be their fate.

Vivian kept watching Kailo as he slept, bound and breathing softly.

Even though she already had him, she wanted more of him.

Even though he was hers, she wanted to own him completely.

She was never a greedy person by nature.

Her only goal during childhood was to survive, so she never desired anything beyond that.

But now, she understood.

There was one thing she could never quench her thirst for.

When it came to Kailo, this insatiable hunger never faded.

She wanted to possess everything about him—his scars, a single strand of his hair, even the breath he exhaled.

Though she was monopolizing him in accordance with her desires, for some reason, he felt farther away than ever.

Vivian gently stroked his cheek to suppress her unease.

At her touch, Kailo blinked lightly and woke up.

The moment he awoke was Vivian’s favorite.

In this fleeting moment, Kailo couldn’t reveal the sharp hostility he usually directed at her.

His soft gaze, reminiscent of his past self, was directed at her, and it was her only solace.

That’s why Vivian woke up earlier every morning to watch him rise.

A quiet exchange of gazes passed between them.

Vivian wished for that moment to last forever.

But she knew.

This was merely a moment to catch their breath before the fight began.

She also knew Kailo didn’t dislike this moment.

Perhaps for the same reasons as her.

But, as always, Kailo never took the easy path.

He hardened his expression and shattered the fragile peace.

Hostility bloomed in his eyes.

“…Look at me as if you love me.”

Vivian demanded unconsciously.

It was anger at how briefly the moment lasted.

“…Look at me as if I’m precious to you.”

Kailo didn’t comply.

He remained unmoved.

Perhaps it was the morning, but Vivian’s emotions were even more intense.

Her throat tightened as though tears were about to spill, but she turned that frustration into anger.

She couldn’t cry in front of Kailo.

Her growing desperation and sensitivity took over recklessly.

Vivian climbed on top of Kylo.

Her hands moved impulsively toward his neck.

“Look at me… as if you love me…!!”

Vivian glared at him, her hands clasped around his throat.

“Why do you insist on taking the difficult path?! Why can’t you acknowledge it’s not a curse?!”

She didn’t know what expression she was making.

“How many times do I have to tell you that you’re my only one?!”

Vivian screamed, her voice trembling with rage.

Kailo’s parched lips opened slowly.

“…Go ahead.”

He spoke.

That provocation snapped the last thread of her reason.

Vivian tightened her grip on his neck.

Her sharp gaze pierced into his eyes.

…But in the end, she couldn’t bring herself to strangle him.

Her hands trembled as she exerted force, but she couldn’t truly tighten them around his neck.

He was too precious.

She loved him too much.

It was a truth so overwhelming that she felt it might grow uncontrollably if she said it aloud.

Like a doll with its strings cut, she collapsed weakly onto his chest.

“…Just once, Kailo. Just once.”

She was losing her mind.

She thought she was tormenting Kailo, but it was Vivian who was withering away.

“…Just once. Treat me like you used to.”

As if thirsting for a single drop of water in the desert, Vivian begged for his affection.

“…Just once. Call my name with love.”

Kailo shut his eyes tightly without saying a word.

Vivian could tell he was fighting his own painful battle.