Chapter 1: -we had a pope

‘What am I doing here right now?’

“……It seems everyone is here, so let us begin the meeting.”

In the center of the brightly lit corridor, I sat blankly before a massive round table.

An overwhelming ceiling fresco depicting biblical scenes looked down upon us, and cardinals filled the high-quality chairs embroidered with pure gold, making it a suffocatingly burdensome place.

In this place, there was one person who completely mismatched the sacred and dignified atmosphere.

Who was that, you ask?

It was none other than me, Theo Esteron.

The de facto abandoned youngest son of the Esteron ducal family. That was supposed to be the extent of the words describing me.

I abhorred high society, and just thinking about the duties of a noble, such as managing a territory or training knights, made me tired.

For me, with memories of a past life lived in modern times, all of it was nothing but bothersome.

‘I was a jobless slacker in my past life, so why would it be any different here?’

That’s why, with the lighthearted thought of perhaps becoming a clergyman—as it seemed like less work—I became a priest.

My original plan was to settle down comfortably in a rural church and simply live a quiet, easy life under the protection of the Church.

But who was it that said life doesn’t go according to plan? The more I tried to live comfortably, the more things kept getting complicated.

All I did was treat a few injured people who happened to come to the church. Yet, at some point, people began to call me something a little different.

The Saint of Purification.

An absurd and burdensome title, claiming I performed miracles that cleansed all curses from the world.

It would have been great if I truly possessed such abilities, but unfortunately, it was all just a misunderstanding.

How could an ordinary person like me, who ran away from noble duties, possibly have such powers?

To think that merely treating a few illnesses using the limited knowledge from my past life and herbs learned from books would blow up like this.

Thanks to that, I suppose I’m sitting in such an absurd position now.

“His Holiness the Pope has collapsed and does not have much time left.”

In the silent atmosphere, someone spoke gravely.

At his words, the atmosphere instantly grew somber. Several cardinals bowed their heads.

“…So, it has come to this after all.”

The tone was as if a cherished toy had broken and was regrettable.

It wasn’t wrong. To them, the Pope was merely a shield, someone to take on important tasks in their stead.

Of course, the title of Pope came with immense power, but in truth, all important matters could only be executed after discussion with the College of Bishops.

It wasn’t like the comfortable, absolute power of a king.

“So, we need someone to temporarily assume the papal office…”

Their task was to replace a broken part with a new one. A Pope who collapsed from overwork was currently of no concern to them whatsoever.

However, the position of Pope could absolutely not be changed until His Holiness drew his last breath.

Before the Pope’s last breath, this was a crucial meeting to find a way to prepare for the future.

It was called a temporary appointment, but in reality, it was no different from selecting the next Pope.

But I merely kept my head bowed, idly fiddling with my ring.

‘Ah, I’m hungry. After this, I should pester the Saintess for some snacks.’

While thinking such useless thoughts.

I couldn’t even understand why I was here in the first place. No matter how grand the title of ‘Saint’ I was called by, my status was strictly that of an ordinary priest.

Today, I had planned to skip work under the pretext of training and quietly read a book in the library. It’s a laughable story, really, that I ended up sitting here as if dragged in after just happening to pass by the corridor.

“So, who should we choose as the interim Pope?! Don’t just object, present your opinions!”

The cardinals’ voices gradually began to rise.

Right now, I was a presence here, yet not.

Watching the increasingly heated exchanges, I muttered to myself.

‘Should I just run away?’

All I could do here was meekly nod my head.

There was nothing else for me to do but occasionally repeat meaningless reactions like, ‘I see…’ or ‘Ah, I share the same opinion as Your Eminence.’

This was a place to choose a poor soul to temporarily take over the papacy after the Pope collapsed from overwork. For a powerless ordinary priest like me, keeping my mouth shut was the best course of action.

“How about we hold a formal election meeting?”

“His Holiness is still alive and well; we cannot do that! How many times do I have to explain that we only need to select someone to temporarily handle duties right now?!”

Watching the cardinals’ ongoing quarrel-like dispute, which showed no signs of ending, I made a decision.

‘…Yes, I’ll just run away.’

I’ll make an excuse to go to the restroom and escape. I’m useless here anyway, so instead of having my energy drained for no reason, it would be happier for everyone if I just went and read a book in peace.

“Um, I need to use the restroom for a moment…”

“Hmm? Yes, go ahead quickly.”

As soon as I received permission from the cardinal sitting next to me, I immediately stood up and scurried away.

Leaving the fading voices behind, I strolled leisurely down the corridor bathed in warm light, and only then did a sense of relief wash over me.

Anyway, an interim Pope.

Just thinking about it already gives me a headache.

“Whoever it is, I pity them.”

Well, it has nothing to do with me, though.

****

“……By the way, where did Priest Theo go?”

Amidst the ongoing meeting, when a cardinal who had been ardently voicing his opinions asked, another replied without hesitation.

“He said he was going to the restroom for a moment, but he hasn’t returned yet.”

A brief silence fell. After a moment, someone among the cardinals, who had been silently looking at each other, let out a sigh.

“……He ran away, didn’t he.”

The end of his sentence carried weariness and resignation.

It was always like this. Despite being in a position called a saint, Theo was always plotting his escape.

They knew he always avoided getting entangled in bothersome matters, but they hadn’t expected him to run away even this time.

“Hahaha, it’s good to be young. To be able to slip out of such an important and troublesome meeting. Old folks like us don’t even have the energy for that.”

“Ha, same here. If they told me to take on even the interim papacy, I might just end up in a coffin within a few years, I tell you.”

All cardinals were, in fact, effectively papal candidates.

However, everyone present here desperately wished not to take on the bothersome position of Pope themselves.

The Pope’s position, requiring an absurd 14 hours of work a day, seven days a week, was no different from a poisoned chalice.

There was a good reason why the current Pope had collapsed from overwork.

The cardinals present here were all quite old, generally approaching 70. Naturally, no one wanted to work until they died.

“In that sense, then… how about we just put Priest Theo in the position of interim Pope this time?”

“……!”

For a brief moment, the cardinals’ gazes quickly interchanged. It was an outlandish idea, yet not an impossible one.

The Saint’s reputation made it possible.

Soon, another nodded gravely.

“That’s a good idea. After all, the public already praises him as a saint, don’t they? There’s no reason to object.”

“Plus, we can secure public support. Everyone believes he’s chosen by the Divine, so we won’t even need to persuade them ourselves.”

“Most importantly, he has a quiet disposition. He’s young, and his ignorance of politics is also appealing. If we wish, we can guide him in the direction we want.”

“Indeed. He’s the safest card for us, in fact.”

The more they thought about it, the more advantages appeared. In that moment, everyone present united in thought.

To dump all of this onto Theo…

No. To bestow upon him a sacred mission.

“But he is still a priest. There has never been a case of a priest becoming Pope, has there?”

“Then why not promote him to cardinal while we’re at it? He has accomplishments, after all. As long as we follow the proper procedures, there won’t be any problem, will there?”

“……Pardon?”

A young archbishop questioned, but the discussion had already gained momentum, and objections became meaningless.

“Good. With the papal office vacant, the College of Cardinals can exercise personnel authority.”

“Right. Based on that, we can immediately sign and announce it.”

“We nominate Priest Theo Esteron as cardinal.”

“And then, we recommend him as the next Pope. Hahaha. This truly is a perfect flow of events.”

“Very well, then proceed at once. I’m tired, so let’s end this meeting quickly.”

Their opinions quickly converged, to the point where one might wonder if these were the same people who had just been arguing loudly.

All of them simply wanted to quickly dump this burdensome position onto someone else.

Of course, it wasn’t that they wanted to refuse the position of the Divine’s most faithful servant. If the mission were given to them, they all intended not to refuse it.

It was just that their desire not to take on more responsibility in this chaotic situation was greater.

In that sense, the presence of a young and reputable saint was the best option for them, one they had no reason to refuse.

Soon, documents, seals, and official declarations were prepared, and all arrangements were completed swiftly.

Thus, on this day, Theo, who had maintained his status as a priest, ascended to the position of cardinal in one fell swoop.

Had he known, he would have tried to stop it by any means necessary, but unfortunately, the unaware party was leisurely enjoying refreshments with the Saintess.

Since the founding of the Elserada Order, it was a promotion at an unprecedented speed.