Chapter 1: Difficulty level???

I had possessed the body of a character in a female-oriented game.

The game took place in a medieval fantasy setting, with the main stage being a place called Reville Academy.

The heroine, Sierra, becomes involved with five men and must choose one in the end, a typical romance visual novel.

I had possessed the body of an extra character.

My name was Emil Tier.

I was an ordinary character, a noble of moderate standing, with no particular traits or significance.

But…

I gained a special ability, a bonus from my possession.

[Miracle of Despair – You will never accept a bad ending!]

“Oh! Is this some kind of luck-boosting bonus?”

When I first saw the ability, I was quite happy.

It seemed to be a bonus that improved the chances of avoiding a bad ending.

Given that I wished to live a peaceful and uneventful life in this world, this was a very welcome ability.

Then, of course, a mission appeared for me.

Ding!

[Find true love and meet a happy fate!]

[Warning! If you do not find true love, you will reach a bad ending!]

It was, as expected from a dating simulation, a mission to find “love.”

The fact that no specific love interest was pointed out meant that I, as an ordinary extra, could pursue anyone.

But, I had a special ability!

So, I decided to take on a rather bold challenge.

That challenge was to target the original heroine!

However, the heroine was not Sierra, the main character.

“Well, it’s impossible for someone like me to be the main character.”

Sierra would eventually end up with one of the five male protagonists.

And those five men were all overpowered “flower boys,” making it nearly impossible for anyone else to win their affection.

I gave up on Sierra from the start.

But that was okay.

What I was aiming for was to target Sierra’s rival, the “villainess.”

I was going after one of the five heroines who would eventually be discarded by the five male protagonists.

Though they were called “villainesses,” they were simply rival characters to Sierra.

While playing the game, I found these five villainesses to be quite captivating.

They were beautiful, earnest in love, and especially admirable in their willingness to use any means to achieve their goals.

But in the end, they were all defeated by the protagonist.

I felt sorry for them.

Seeing them rejected by the male protagonists after doing their best, and facing heartbreaking endings, deeply moved me.

So, I thought, “If you’re going to discard them, then I’ll take them!”

With that lighthearted thought, I decided to go after one of the villainesses.

After all, I had the [Miracle of Despair] to help me avoid bad endings.

Of course, I didn’t plan to do the dishes for them.

I didn’t want to end up with one of them after they had been through all sorts of hardship, fallen deeply in love with the male protagonists, and were ultimately abandoned.

No, my goal was to win their hearts before they were discarded—before they met that sad fate.

I already knew how to pursue them.

So, I set about targeting one of the villainesses.

“I love you sincerely. Will you be mine?”

The result was romantic and successful.

I managed to win over one of the heroines.

It wasn’t that difficult.

I knew her painful past, so I filled the void in her heart and gradually got closer to her.

Naturally, we grew closer than anyone else and fell in love with each other.

I felt happy.

“I’m glad I got possessed…”

I considered my possession a blessing.

And I was also thankful for the [Miracle of Despair] that helped me avoid bad endings.

But then…

What?

It was all an illusion.

“Sorry…”

From the start, I was just a second-string option for her.

“But I really love him! My feelings are genuine!”

“Then what about me…”

“Emil…”

“What about all the things we shared together?”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry for hurting you…”

After becoming lovers with one of them, the story began to unfold differently from the game.

“I can’t live without him now…”

Among the five male protagonists, the one who had originally planned to discard her, came and took her away.

“Stop! I was serious! If you were going to do this, you should have never accepted me in the first place!!”

The girl who promised to love me so easily fell for him.

It was like a prostitute who would sell her body for money.

After that, there was only pain.

I gave my all.

I loved her truly.

Ha, huff…chuup, ha…

The moment I saw her in a passionate kiss with him, my heart shattered.

“You bastard!! How dare you!!”

“Ah~! Stop! Emil–!!”

“What the hell is this guy? Can’t he just get lost?!”

“Ahhh!”

With revenge in my heart, I charged at the man, but…

The result was a crushing defeat.

It was inevitable.

He, the male protagonist, was “overpowered.”

There was no way to win against him.

In the end, I was humiliated, beaten senseless in front of the girl I loved.

“Ha, ha… ha ha…”

When despair came, laughter bubbled up.

It hurt.

I thought my broken heart couldn’t hurt any more than this.

But there was even greater pain.

And that pain was unbearable.

I despaired.

My mind shattered.

Darkness covered my heart.

Like black ink falling into a bucket of water, the darkness slowly consumed me.

It drove me toward an extreme choice.

In some ways, it was the only revenge I could take.

Death.

I would die in front of her.

I would make her regret it.

With that mindset, I prepared a rope and went up to the roof.

If I hang myself on the roof of the academy’s main building, every student coming to school will see it.

So.

My first life came to an end.

And then.

Ding!

[You have encountered a bad ending. ‘Miracle of Despair’ is activated.]

The moment I took my own life,

I realized the truth about my possession special ability.

‘What the hell…’

That’s right.

What I thought was a lucky ability to avoid bad endings was, as the description said, an ability that allows you to avoid a bad ending once it happens.

Simply put, a reset.

I returned to the moment I first possessed her, before I started pursuing her.

‘Oh my god…’

Ding!

[As a side effect of ‘Miracle of Despair,’ ‘Mental Healing’ is activated.]

It was an incredible power.

The mind that had been consumed by darkness became clear.

A new opportunity!

Another chance was given to me.

The regression was a salvation granted to the despairing me.

‘I was wrong to choose that bitch. I picked her because she had the biggest chest.’

With my restored mental state, I smiled and threw the nightmare of the previous cycle out of my mind.

A new beginning!

After all, the heroines I liked were five!

One of them just had a trashy, prostitute-like mindset.

This time, I would find true love, and that would be enough.

And then.

Ding!

[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]

‘Sorry, but it turned out this way.’

Ding!

[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]

‘Ahaha, of course, I really loved you too, Emil.’

Ding!

[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]

‘Ugh… It’s noisy. Now, I just don’t feel the same about you.’

Ding!

[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]

‘What? Didn’t you hear? I don’t need you anymore.’

After going through four more regressions,

I realized that my choices weren’t wrong.

I wasn’t the one who was wrong.

All five of them were trash.

Even all five of them, had seduced the man who would have abandoned them and betrayed me.

‘Fuck, fuck, fuuuuck!!’

Of course, every time I approached them sincerely, I was hurt every time.

In the end, I was despairing.

I met a cruel end for the sake of revenge.

I prayed that they would regret and be sad.

But in the very end,

even the fifth one betrayed me,

and I realized that my expectations had also been betrayed.

Ding!

[You have achieved the fifth bad ending! As a result of achieving all bad endings, you are awarded an additional event CG!]

Additional event CG.

It was like a hidden CG that you get when you reach the true ending in a romance simulation game.

However, for me, possessing this game, the CG was delivered in a video format.

Ahh..! Good…! I love you…! Do it more…! Please do it a lot inside…!

In the video, the women were panting like prostitutes.

Moreover, the perspective of the video was on the day I died.

Even after seeing me hanging from the academy’s rooftop,

That night, they mingled with the guys and made dirty sounds.

Even in the video, they were laughing happily.

“Please go away, please…”

I wanted to skip the video, but I couldn’t.

In the dark space, only my consciousness existed.

And the system cruelly continued to show me the video.

The video only ended after showing all five women’s interactions.

“What the hell. What do you want from me…”

I murmured in the darkness.

I don’t want this anymore.

I don’t want this.

Possessing someone, not being the protagonist—this isn’t a blessing.

Such a possession, with regressions happening one after another, wasn’t salvation either.

This is, in some ways, hell.

Maybe I committed a great sin before the possession.

Maybe this is why I’m being punished.

That thought crossed my mind.

“I just… loved them sincerely…”

Ironically, at that moment, I recalled the happy moments I had with them.

Holding my hand and blushing.

Getting mad over little skinship and feeling embarrassed.

Sometimes shedding tears and confirming each other’s sincerity.

Like that.

I remembered the moments when I loved them so warmly.

The fleeting memories lasted only a few seconds, but for me at that time, it was a long time.

The love they gave me is deeply rooted in my heart.

And just as those roots were ripped out in an instant, a huge, tattered hole was left in my heart.

Ding!

[‘Miracle of Despair’ is activated!]

Stop.

Stop now.

I can’t do it anymore.

It won’t work anyway.

Someone else?

Even if I find someone, I’ll just have them taken away again.

This is that kind of story.

I’m just a person who can only be like that.

Ding!

[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]

A mission came to mind.

That message that always appeared before me whenever I regressed.

But I buried my head in my knees.

Ding!

[‘Mental Healing’ is activated!]

Ssssst!

I felt the activation of a familiar ability.

That special power that healed my wounded heart after each regression.

Normally, after receiving this healing, I would recover my heart and challenge another heroine again.

But.

“I don’t want to, I don’t want to… I don’t want to get hurt anymore…”

A curse had already been cast upon my heart.

No matter how much I recover mentally, the memories won’t disappear.

The moment my mind recovered, the memories that were deeply ingrained in my head once again dug at my heart.

Up until now, there had been ‘hope’ that another heroine existed.

But after being betrayed by the fifth heroine, I lost even that hope.

So I declared my resignation.

I just buried my head in my knees and prayed for time to pass.

I don’t want to do anything like love anymore.

They’ll betray me anyway.

I’m just an extra, that’s how it is.

In the end, they easily give in when some well-to-do guys seduce them.

I’m just a self-esteem vending machine to briefly fill up their needs.

I don’t want to get hurt like that anymore.

So.

Please, stop now…

— Ding!

The message that should have ended echoed in my head once again.

In my disorientation, I absentmindedly raised my head.

A new message appeared on the dead-eyed screen.

[The player’s despair value has exceeded the threshold.]

[Do you want to adjust the difficulty?]

[Y/N]

“I… what?”

A message I had never seen before.

It was a message I had never encountered in the five regressions.

So.

I absentmindedly pressed the [Y] button.

Ding!

[Difficulty has changed from [HARD] to [EASY].]

[Additional perks according to the difficulty level will be granted!]

“What…?”

The difficulty changed from hard to easy..?

So, all of that until now was in hard mode…?

But wait, the heroine targeting itself wasn’t that difficult, so why was that?

But all of those questions vanished when I saw the next message.

Ding!

[Charm of Tears – Women will perceive you as an extremely attractive person!]

[Blooming Talent – Challenge anything. You will achieve it!]

[Sweet Voice – Your voice is now enchanting. Anyone will easily accept your words!]

“Ugh…”

Unbelievable perks appeared one after another.

I didn’t know such things existed.

Five cycles, about one year per cycle.

It was the secret of this possession that I had discovered after five years.

That absurd fact momentarily brought my mind, which had been engulfed in despair, back to normal.

And then the system explanation about easy mode followed.

Ding!

[Welcome to easy difficulty!]

[Easy difficulty always provides ‘Mental Healing’! Forget the painful memories and challenge for a happy ending!]

[However, the ‘Miracle of Despair’ perk from hard difficulty has been retrieved… retrieved… retrieved…, retrie… retri… retriii…]

But.

Suddenly, the system window crackled and an error message appeared.

Ding!

[An error has occurred due to the increased despair value.]

[System maintenance in progress…]

[Complete]

It was the first time this happened, so I stared blankly at the scene.

And then, at the very end of the message, which had returned to normal,

The message content had changed.

[However, the ‘Miracle of Despair’ from hard difficulty has been transformed into ‘Despair’s Memory’!]

“Despair’s Memory…?”

Is this some kind of wordplay?

In my frustration, I clicked on the perks section in the system window.

Under the perks I had just gained in easy mode, a new perk, ‘Despair’s Memory,’ had been added.

What the hell.

After reading that, I laughed out loud.

“Haha, haha, hahaha!!”

I laughed like a madman.

It was exhilarating.

There was no way I couldn’t feel good.

“Hahahahahaha!!”

After all, Possessing is a blessing, and regression is salvation.

[Despair’s Memory – Reject the confession! Show them the reason why!]

***

Author’s note (Author’s message)

Thank you for reading!

If you enjoyed it, please leave a recommendation, bookmark, and comment!

Especially the comments really help with writing! Thank you.