Ch.99The Weight of Vengeance (3)

“…..Oh no.”

On the third day of the journey, the merchant who had stopped at a small village near their destination let out a groan. They were only two days away from the Bones family’s territory.

After stroking his chin for a while, he gathered everyone and declared, “….Our destination has changed. We can’t go to the Bones territory anymore.”

Though questions formed in my mind, I didn’t show it. After all, I had somewhat achieved my goal of heading north.

I wasn’t curious about why he changed the destination, nor did it matter to me.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

He looked at me and raised his eyebrows.

“Ah, I forgot you were here. Yes, since our destination has changed, I should tell you. We’re heading to the Vensrak family’s territory. Will you come along?”

The Vensrak family.

Another name familiar to me.

I knew their son, Kyle Vensrak.

In the novel, Kyle Vensrak was an informant who investigated the twins’ background. He was eventually caught and executed.

As for his connection to me… well, he was the one who first told me that Kirsy was talking behind my back.

“…….”

It was a bit concerning.

Even though I knew to be careful around the Vensrak family, I was still entering the territory of a family skilled in gathering information.

Would this be okay?

Well, it wouldn’t be a major problem if my identity was discovered, but it still felt uncomfortable.

Of course, I didn’t have many options. Even if I parted ways with the merchant here, the distance to the next town was considerable.

It’s not like the Bones family was my destination anyway. It might be better to find another means of transportation to the Hexter family from the Vensrak territory.

“I’ll come with you.”

“Good, then it’s settled.”

He gestured to the rest of the guards and said, “Don’t worry. Even though your escort duty will be one day shorter, I’ll pay you the full amount.”

****

That evening, we arrived at the Vensrak territory. The Vensrak family’s land wasn’t very extensive, so they had surrounded their entire territory with a castle wall.

Unlike the Cecil family near the Praester territory, this was my first visit to the Vensrak family, so I didn’t have to worry about the gatekeepers recognizing me.

I also didn’t need to prove my identity. With the merchant’s vouching, we all passed through the castle gates.

Immediately after, I parted ways with the merchant.

The merchant, saying he was in a hurry, quickly paid the mercenaries and left.

The city was filled with the sound of music and the smell of food. I thought about relieving my fatigue with delicious food and a decent lodging, but I shook my head.

While I wasn’t in a desperate financial situation, I didn’t know how long my journey would be. It seemed better to save as much money as possible.

After filling my stomach adequately, I rented a cheap room and rested.

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The next day, I once again found a merchant who could take me to the next village in the same manner.

The only issue was that this merchant wouldn’t depart for another three days.

I managed to prove my skills to him and secured lodging and meals during the wait, but the longer the delay, the more I felt a vague, sticky pressure.

It might just be my imagination, but I felt like someone was watching me. Was it because I had abandoned the twins? Or because I was in the Vensrak family’s territory? Either way, I covered my face more firmly with my hood.

News about me had spread even in the Vensrak territory. Asena’s influence had reached this far.

I already knew this, but now that I had left, I truly felt how powerful Asena was. Or rather, the Praester family? Kirsy would have similar power.

Only after becoming a commoner did I clearly see how unreachably high their position was.

As Asena had said, I had become someone who couldn’t see her even if I cried and begged.

Not that I would do that, but it meant that distance had grown between us.

This was the first time our relationship had become so distant.

So I found myself thinking. A personal thought I could have now that I was alone. A thought I wouldn’t show in front of others.

What were the twins doing now?

****

Asena had developed a new habit.

She would startle whenever she heard a knock on the door.

Expecting news she had been waiting for.

-Knock knock.

Once again, Asena flinched in her chair and spoke.

“Come in.”

Helen opened the door and entered. Like the twins, she too had become gaunt, following her mistress.

“…Lady Asena.”

“…..So?”

Asena pretended to be calm as she looked down at her documents. She wasn’t reading or writing anything, but she pretended to be doing something.

“…..We couldn’t find him.”

Though she had heard the same words every day, her heart sank each time.

After expressing her anger toward Caden for two days, on the third day, Asena had ordered them to find him.

While she couldn’t bring him back after he had left like that, she wanted news of him. With the power of a ducal family, finding someone shouldn’t have been difficult.

Where he was. What he was thinking. Whether he missed them. She wanted to know everything about him.

If he was getting close to another woman, she needed to know that too. Daisy was currently unavoidable, but other women without such ties were different.

She couldn’t bear the thought of him getting close to another woman after abandoning them.

For many reasons, Asena had tried to find Caden, but he had vanished like a mirage. Despite the passage of time, there wasn’t even a report of someone seeing him.

Each time she heard this, Asena writhed in pain. She couldn’t even know where her brother had gone.

No matter how much she had declared that she would never see his face again, she feared that it might truly happen.

“….You may go.”

Asena could no longer contain her body’s abnormal reactions.

As Helen immediately obeyed the command and left the room, Asena clutched her head and collapsed on the desk.

Her shoulders trembled like an aspen tree, and her breathing became rapid.

Only now did she realize how dark the world was without him.

And it was harder to endure than she had expected.

Her longing for him grew stronger with each passing day. And not knowing when it would end was agonizing.

She knew this was just the beginning. Only seven days had passed since he left.

He wasn’t someone who would return anytime soon, no matter what she did.

That fact tormented her.

Asena came to her senses when she tasted something metallic in her mouth.

She had been unconsciously biting her lip.

Asena rose from her seat.

She truly couldn’t endure it anymore.

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For the past seven days, her pride had prevented her from coming near this place. Despite her longing for Caden and assigning trackers and informants to find him, she had pretended not to wait for news of him in front of Helen, the head maid, or Tein, the head butler.

But even that was over now. Like someone drawn to a drug, Asena stood in front of Caden’s room.

-Creak.

She opened the door without hesitation.

“……”

And immediately saw someone who had already occupied Caden’s bed.

It was Kirsy. Though her face wasn’t visible, it was clear she was lying under the covers.

Was it because she had lost her composure since Caden disappeared? Asena’s anger, which had become very easy to ignite recently, flared up again, and she approached the bed and pulled off the covers.

As the blanket covering her disappeared, Kirsy blinked awake. There were clear tear stains on her face.

She didn’t say anything to Asena. She glanced at Asena with tired, sleepy eyes and then closed them again.

“….Get up. Why are you in here?”

Asena woke Kirsy, who was trying to go back to sleep.

Given the situation, all sorts of thoughts crossed her mind.

She felt like Kirsy was stealing Caden’s scent.

Her sister was erasing the traces of Caden, who might not return for a long time, by rubbing her body all over them.

“….Leave me alone..”

“Then don’t erase our brother’s traces and get out..!”

“Sister, you said you hated him.”

Asena was left speechless by Kirsy’s blunt words. Suddenly, she wondered what the point of all this was.

Losing something so significant had made her petty. When they were receiving his love abundantly, they didn’t fight over who was lying on the bed.

He was gone anyway.

What was the use of being greedy for the leftovers like defeated soldiers…..they couldn’t be satisfied anyway.

For a moment, she felt incredibly shabby for coming here like this.

Kirsy, lying on the bed, closed her eyes again. Tears flowed from her eyes and pooled on the bridge of her nose.

Her breathing became unsteady, as if Asena’s appearance had disturbed her calm emotions.

Then, as if spilling out thoughts she had been holding back, she spoke while trying to control her trembling breath.

“……Sister…can you see….?”

“……?”

Asena didn’t understand her words and remained silent.

Kirsy continued, her eyes tightly shut.

“….Brother’s room…I came here every day…I visited every day….sob…why do I only see these broken things after he’s gone…?”

Asena froze for a moment at Kirsy’s words, then slowly began to move her eyes.

And just as she said, the broken things were all too visible.

The room, having lost the light and specialness that was Caden, was so shabby. When he was here, she had been too distracted by him to notice.

The cracked window. The teacup and teapot that looked rustic without Caden beside them. The faded wardrobe. The stained floor. The worn sword stand. The old table and chair.

Though it wasn’t intentional discrimination, the sight was shocking.

Kirsy murmured.

“…..I should have treated him better…sob….I should have treated him better when he was here…”

Asena bit her still-healing lip once more.

“What if he left because of this…? What if his dislike for us was just an excuse, and he left because of accumulated dissatisfaction? How did I not see it….?”

Asena could only clench her fists. She couldn’t weaken her resolve yet. Even though she had secretly come to Caden’s room because she missed him, publicly, she had to hate Caden. She had promised her brother that.

Only then would Caden regret it. Only then could she show him that she wouldn’t just take it.

But…the more she saw the flaws in this room, the more deeply she empathized with Kirsy’s words. Just as there were things she only saw now, her brother might have unknowingly accumulated dissatisfaction.

He had always been considerate of her, but she felt like she hadn’t been the same until the end.

Even in the final moment, she had only spewed words of hatred at him. She had been selfish and dirty to the end.

Asena began to feel frustrated.

She regretted it, but she knew that if the situation arose again, she would act the same way.

She couldn’t send him off with a smile as he left.

That was her personality.

……What else should she have done? How should she have contained that anger? How should she have acted when the one she desperately wanted to hold onto was leaving?

“….Ugh.”

No matter how much she tried to justify herself, she couldn’t easily look at this room from which Caden had departed.

It wasn’t that the room was a complete mess, but every flaw made her regret not treating him more preciously.

Kirsy staggered to her feet.

“….Sister. So give me the blanket. I can’t bear to see… I, brother…”

She swallowed a tear and suggested to Asena.

“…..Let’s…let’s fix this room first.”

“….What?”

“…When brother comes back….no. If he comes back…no. When…”

Kirsy frowned, unable to continue her sentence, and another tear rolled down. Once again, she couldn’t finish her sentence.

“…..Anyway. I can’t bear to see this room. Let’s fix it….so that if brother comes back, he’ll be satisfied….okay..?”

Asena had no other answer. She just nodded weakly.

****

From the next day, everything in Caden’s room began to change. All the old furniture was thrown away, and any flawed or dirty items were replaced with new ones. The things he had touched were gone, but the twins reluctantly let them go.

The only things they didn’t change were Caden’s bed and blanket.

Much of his scent had dissipated as they turned the room upside down, but they had to accept that as well.

For some reason, Asena and Kirsy felt the most at ease in the past eight days while organizing his room.

Of course, they shed bitter tears whenever they came across mementos.

Letters or flowers they had given him when they were young. Even stones. He had kept everything in a corner.

With difficulty, they sighed tearfully, set aside the mementos, and finished organizing the room.

While the servants removed and installed the heavy furniture, the twins made all other decisions.

By evening, looking at the organized room, Kirsy slowly sat on the bed.

If only he would come back to this room. If only he would see the changed room, praise her, thank her, pat her head, hold her preciously, and kiss her.

She tried not to think about how that might be an unattainable dream.

She already knew too well that thinking about it would hurt.

Asena slowly approached and sat beside her.

They didn’t say anything.

They were the ones who understood each other’s pain the best.

They both felt emptiness after organizing the room like this.

“……”

“……”

Their silence was broken in an instant.

-Bang!

“Lady Asena! Lady Kirsy!”

Asena’s heart leaped at the sight of Helen rushing in without knocking.

“…Helen?”

She said.

“We found him…! Lord Caden…!”