Ch.93Epilogue – Fight On, STL! (5)

Meanwhile, Tesser was wandering through the garden shrouded in darkness, lost in thought.

‘Perhaps I… shouldn’t have let Eshtiel go like that.’

Tesser had absolutely no intention of ruining Eshtiel’s mood. This was because Eshtiel was a precious connection to Tesser as well, and a girl who deserved to be respected.

‘I really was foolish, wasn’t I…’

Making up such a transparent excuse would only be insulting. Perhaps Eshtiel would see through the lie in less than a day or two. If that happened, his position would clearly become even more awkward.

Even aside from that, Tesser was questioning his own response.

With any other noble lady, he would never have told such a lie.

He needed time to reflect on why he had put up such a ridiculous barrier against Eshtiel’s advances.

‘When I think about it, there was really… no reason to refuse.’

Just as Tesser was a perfect groom, Eshtiel was a perfect bride. The achievements in managing the knightly order inherited from Rahilt were outstanding, and her background was impressive beyond words. She was a girl with absolutely no reason to be rejected.

‘Yes, there’s… logically speaking, absolutely no reason to refuse.’

Tesser was ignorant about the feeling of liking someone.

If pressed, he greatly admired Rahilt, but only a fool wouldn’t know how far that was from the emotion called love.

While his parents and sister had chosen their partners through heart-fluttering love, Tesser had yet to find anyone who caught his eye.

Because of this, he had no aversion to the concept of a political marriage. Rather, he thought a married life where both parties simply fulfilled their obligations might not be so bad.

Therefore, in Tesser’s mind, there was hardly any reason to reject Eshtiel’s advances.

This was why Tesser had fallen into deep self-reflection.

“Haah…”

He let out a heavy sigh.

“If it had been someone else, I wouldn’t be agonizing this much.”

In that sense, Eshtiel was special.

Her every light action always caused Tesser to worry.

Watching her bouncy behavior made him feel anxious, yet also somewhat amused. Either way, she was a girl who strangely drew his attention.

It was while Tesser was endlessly wandering the garden that it happened.

Rustle.

The sound of footsteps on grass from behind.

Tesser instinctively raised his guard and identified the intruder.

“Oh, it’s just me, Tesser.”

“Mother.”

“Won’t you call me Imperial Mother? Though I suppose formalities and titles are useless when it’s just the two of us.”

“…”

“Really, you don’t understand jokes. You and Seriniel are exactly alike in your lack of charm…”

The Empress playfully chided Tesser. Meanwhile, confused by the sudden encounter with his mother, Tesser couldn’t easily find words to speak.

So the role of taking the initiative fell to the mother in place of her awkward son.

“The night air is nice. The stars are visible which adds to the charm… Since we’ve run into each other, let’s have some tea that’s good for sleep.”

At this unexpected suggestion, Tesser could only nod in agreement.

“Alright.”

The time it took to move to another location wasn’t long.

This was because near the garden was a glass greenhouse where only the imperial family was permitted to enter.

There, the Empress prepared tea and set the cups herself without calling for a lady-in-waiting.

“Mother, I’ll do it.”

“What are you trying to do? There’s nothing more bitter than tea brewed by men. You just need to stay quiet.”

“… Yes.”

The Empress’s smile was somewhat bleak. It was indeed the pressure befitting the Empress who had written history. Overwhelmed by her immense presence, Tesser could only savor the sound of brewing tea from where he sat.

Eventually, the Empress poured the tea with perfect etiquette. Tesser was momentarily captivated by this unfamiliar sight. The Empress, seeming to know this, smiled awkwardly and spoke.

“Your father had the exact same expression. Despite being the daughter of a poor baronet family, I was unnecessarily beautiful in this regard.”

“You can say that about yourself.”

“Of course, that taciturn man told me directly when he proposed. Naturally, I should take pride in it.”

“I see…”

A taciturn man, she said.

Judging by the Emperor’s usual behavior toward the Empress, it was a side of him Tesser couldn’t imagine. If his mother hadn’t told him directly, he would have dismissed it as a lie.

“Well, in that respect, you resemble that man more than Seriniel. Being taciturn and boring, and how your cold face quickly cracks when you’re flustered… Secretly, father and son are both equally unable to hide their emotions.”

Of course, the Empress was slightly different.

With faint elven blood flowing through her veins, she could strongly sense others’ emotions. Using this ability, she had caught her young companion off guard countless times.

“Still, raising children isn’t fun whether it’s Seriniel or you. Both of you had excessively strong independence from a young age. And you were both so diligent that you didn’t really need to attend the Academy.”

“Was I really that diligent? Me…”

“Don’t even try to deny it. Whether it was Seriniel’s influence or not, you too were shut away in either the library or the training ground before you even matured. That’s why even at this age, you don’t have a single friend to open your heart to.”

“…… I didn’t make any on purpose because I didn’t need them.”

“As your mother, I’ll pretend to believe that once.”

“…”

Tesser began to feel self-loathing.

He didn’t think he was being led by his mother to have a midnight tea party just to hear a storm of nagging after several years.

He thought they would have a simple conversation, but he had no idea such a heavy weight of nagging was waiting.

However, the twist came instantly.

“That’s why I’m so envious of the Grand Duke of Elhader.”

“What?”

“Don’t you think? Having such an adorable younger sister like Count Elenot. If Seriniel were even half like her, I would have no other wishes.”

“I-is that so?”

“That’s why I feel even more sorry. After all, I’m the culprit who planted memories of being a laundry outcast in that child’s early years.”

“But you can’t deny it was a reasonable decision. The Count Elenot family was the right arm of the fallen former emperor.”

Avoiding execution was already fortunate. It seemed like there had never been such a peaceful rebellion. It was a possible disposition because the couple had rebelled through politics rather than military force.

Even so, the Empress seemed unable to erase her sense of debt.

“Count Elenot. Eshtiel… that child is truly remarkable. Even though I should feel uncomfortable, she approached me without hesitation and gave me joy with every movement of her lips. Yes, rather than remarkable, ‘strong’ might be a more fitting word.”

“You really like Eshtiel, Mother.”

“If there was a guarantee that I could still have a daughter exactly like that child, I would go beg your father right now. Well, that’s impossible though.”

“Ahaha.”

Tesser laughed soullessly.

He didn’t want to hear about his parents’ intimate affairs in the middle of the night.

“Given these circumstances… another method quietly occurred to me.”

“Another method?”

“Yes.”

The next moment, Tesser lost focus at his mother’s words, shot like a cannonball.

“I was thinking… wouldn’t it be resolved if Count Elenot became part of our family?”

“…… Puhh! Kuk, cough! Kelock!”

Tesser barely succeeded in spitting out the tea he almost sprayed in his mother’s face onto the floor.

What she was implying was all too clear.

“Mother, you want me to be with Eshtiel.”

“Well. I wonder if I even need to want it…”

“What? After saying all that, now you’re saying something different.”

“Shouldn’t you know that yourself?”

“Me?”

“Hmm.”

The Empress was frustrated by her son’s insensitivity. However, finding it too vexing to teach him outright, she deliberately dropped only meaningful hints.

“Anyway, not even knowing why there’s no noble lady who catches your eye at your age… I wonder who you got this from.”

The Empress clicked her tongue and downed her cooling tea in one go.

Then she smiled meaningfully.

Tesser found his mother’s concealed intentions unsettling.

“Go ahead and worry all you want.”

The Empress added.

“Of course, only as much as won’t interfere with tomorrow’s schedule.”

“… Please go in.”

At her son’s dry goodnight, the Empress remarked, “Really, not an ounce of cuteness…” and left the greenhouse with what was not quite a rebuke.

Tesser left the greenhouse only after the Empress had completely disappeared from sight.

“Haah…”

The cool dawn air brushed his cheeks, carrying the scent of grass. The full moon shone beautifully round amidst the stars embroidering the sky. Yes, the full moon…

‘Eshtiel’s face used to look like the full moon too.’

Before she lost her baby fat, Eshtiel had chubby cheeks and round eyes that reminded him of the full moon whenever he saw her. Her skin looked so soft that he had to struggle to resist the urge to touch it.

Remembering those times, a smile escaped him.

The time spent with Eshtiel certainly had many difficult moments, but it seemed there were far more joyful ones.

“I should… apologize.”

It would be better to honestly reveal the lie as well. Having known her for so long, deceiving her with such an absurd lie would be a fault beyond human decency.

Tesser made up his mind.

‘It’s quite ironic that the only person who concerns me this much happens to be Eshtiel.’

There’s no denying that Eshtiel is a special person to him.

He has a feeling that if she were to disappear, he would miss her innocent personality and feel empty.

As he gazed at the softly glowing full moon, suddenly a record of a brief conversation resurfaced from the depths of Tesser’s memories.

[Thank you, Tesser oppa. This is super delicious?]

[It’s just candy, what’s the big deal.]

[No, no, it’s not just anything. From today, Tesser oppa is a totally special person to me.]

A very cheap specialness earned with candy he had given her almost forcibly.

It was his first experience of being granted a specialness he couldn’t find himself.

Perhaps Eshtiel had developed affection for him, drawn by that cheap specialness. Throughout the long years that could never be ignored or belittled.

“… Ah.”

In an instant, Tesser felt heat rising from his cheeks to his head.

Without even searching for the source of this unidentified heat, memories sprouted like verdant growth in spring.

Most of those memories were bright and cheerful.

A little girl chattering clearly with clumsy pronunciation stood out vividly.

Tesser finally realized.

The person who first made him special.

The person who helped him catch up to his unreachable sister.

The person who became the only exception to his indifferent human relationships.

They were all one girl.

Tesser finally became aware.

There was a reason why noble ladies who made their name in social circles with beauty alone looked like logs to him.

There was a reason why he found the parade of gorgeous dresses merely dizzying.

There was definitely a reason why he projected one person onto the full moon for no apparent reason.

“No way…”

Denial and self-mockery burst forth simultaneously.

“I can’t be this stupid… I can’t be…”

Tesser rubbed his face dry. But covering his face with his palms couldn’t hide the sky.

“…”

Finally facing the clear world, Tesser, confronted with the sudden truth, could only weakly murmur.

“It was you. The special person…”

With a thud, he sat down on the grass.

Everything seemed foolish.

The grass, the flowers, the leaves,

And himself…