Ch.70The Great Sinner (2)

In an instant, the world filled with monochrome. The second hand slowed unbearably, and a disturbing ringing sound ran wild near his temples.

He possessed linguistic genius rivaling Aselln Meoric. Yet the news hastily delivered by the head maid was difficult to accept even superficially.

“Lord Netionpis… Founding Noble! I understand your feelings, but you mustn’t do this. The Duke, Duke Feita is in danger!”

“Stillborn… Lorian… Lorian…”

“Lord Netionpis!!!”

The head maid screamed shrilly. Despite not having the position to do so. She was competent and knew this well. What was happening? He simply couldn’t comprehend.

Consciousness awakened suddenly. Netionpis, as if possessed, bounded up the stairs at once to follow Lorian’s footsteps.

He didn’t commit the foolishness of asking for directions. He simply followed where the servants were hurriedly moving and their anxious gazes—Lorian would be there.

“Lorian. Lorian. Lorian. Lorian. Please. Please…”

He couldn’t even properly form the words he was muttering. His mind was so full of Lorian that there was no room for any other thought.

Finally, he flung open the door with certainty. At the end of his gaze were several people dressed in white. They were physicians surrounding the bed, their eyes narrowed in gravity.

“Lorian!!!”

“Founding Noble?!”

He desperately pushed them aside, closing the distance. He felt he could only calm his frantically distorted mind by confirming Lorian’s well-being with his own eyes.

“Ah… Aah…!”

It was a tremendous misconception. Lorian’s condition, which he finally encountered, was extremely poor. Burning fever. Chest heaving with pain. Passionate breathing.

Above all, what pierced his heart like a large needle was Lorian’s guilt-ridden expression.

“Sorry… I’m sorry… Nes.”

“Don’t speak, Lorian. I’m here. So. So. It’s okay. Apologies like that…”

“Our child that we finally had… I wanted to give birth to a healthy baby… I wanted to give you a child… I’m sorry, Nes. It must be my karma. Perhaps divine punishment for hurting too many people…”

“No, that’s not true. That can’t be.”

I swore, didn’t I? I made a contract, didn’t I? That day, as soon as I heard Astel’s prophecy, I made a covenant with the chain. I would take on all your negativity. I promised to take responsibility for your entire life walking on this earth. I promised. With the power of universal truth? There’s no way your karma could hold you back.

This is just an accident. Lorian’s body or the baby’s couldn’t withstand the childbirth. But… it’s a fatal accident.

Netionpis turned around and asked.

“What will happen to… to Lorian?”

“Well…”

“Save her. Without fail! If she regains her health, I’ll give you wealth to live luxuriously for a lifetime. I’ll grant any wish within my power. So… please, I beg you, please take care of Lorian, my wife…”

He was powerless.

What was a duke? What was a founding noble?

At the crossroads of life and death, one faces equality that transcends status. It was a truth he had experienced countless times in the era of war. He had become arrogant and complacent, and had forgotten it. He had learned nothing from Astel’s death.

How was this any different from when he was a male prostitute with the smell of blood on his limbs? When he served women in a narrow room with mud walls?

As his beloved woman and the child trying to see the light of the world slipped through his fingers like flowing water. There was nothing, nothing he could do. At best, he could only motivate the physicians with his useless power.

There was a man who was obediently driven out of the room according to their instructions. His name was Netionpis. His position was Founding Noble. And now he was called a cripple with intact limbs. He decided to consider himself as such.

At that moment, a clear, high-pitched voice of a girl invaded from the opposite corridor.

“Godfather!”

“Yernia?”

Only one person called him godfather. It was the young Empress Yernia. She ran toward him so quickly that her attendants were flustered.

“Has the news already spread to the imperial palace? That’s fast.”

“Is that what’s important to you, Godfather?! What about the Duchess? How is Duchess Lorian?”

“I don’t know either. I… what should I do?”

“Godfather…!”

Slap!

“Yernia?”

Yernia’s palm made Netionpis’s hand tingle with pain. His eyes widened at the sudden, stinging sensation.

Yernia reprimanded him sincerely.

“Are you a fool, Godfather? Who do you think is the most anxious right now? It’s Duchess Lorian who is in the most pain and fear. But if you’re so confused, who can Duchess Lorian rely on?”

“That’s…”

“Pull yourself together, Godfather. Act calmly, as if nothing serious has happened. The household is in chaos. You need to remain steady for things to stabilize. That will be the best help for the Duchess.”

“Yernia…”

The fourteen-year-old child was remarkable. She immediately organized the situation and suggested the best course of action. They say a tiger doesn’t beget a lamb, but this was like giving birth to a dragon. That was the existence of Yernia, Astel’s daughter.

“Yes. You’re right.”

[Sorry… I’m sorry… Nes…]

That was the first thing Lorian said. There was no reason for her to apologize. It was unlike her usual self to sound so weak.

She had been anxious. Would he hate her for losing the baby? Would he blame Lorian’s karma for the peace obtained through killing people?

Lorian wasn’t one to not know that the companion she chose wasn’t such a pathetic man. But a weakened heart, regardless of will, boils and nurtures demons of doubt.

Yernia had intuitively sensed this.

“Thank you, Yernia.”

“It was just presumptuous advice.”

“Not at all. One should heed the advice of a clever daughter.”

“Godfather? Where are you going?”

“I need to control the mansion. As if nothing happened, just like usual.”

“Shall I help?”

“How could I let the exalted Empress involve herself in household matters?”

“I’m only your daughter when it’s convenient for you.”

“That’s politics.”

“You only teach me the good things.”

A smile escaped at Yernia’s sulky complaint.

With the man worthy of being called her husband becoming the pillar and organizing the mansion, the unsettled atmosphere soon subsided. The servants followed their usual duties, and everyone went to sleep.

Except for the minimum number of people needed to care for Lorian, everything was no different from usual.

After a night passed like that, good news arrived. Lorian had stabilized and was sleeping soundly.

“Lorian…”

He dared not even hold her hand for fear of waking her. Although sweat still flowed, her regular breathing proved her improved condition.

“I don’t need a child. I just need you… As long as you’re safe… I’m fine with nothing.”

So when you open your eyes again, smile for me.

I like you as you usually are, a bit prim and sometimes scary.

I want to see you overcome this wound with strength.

If that’s difficult, I’ll help you.

I wish you would let me support you.

…

……

But Netionpis’s wish might have been too much to ask for.

When Lorian opened her eyes again, she was different from before. She who had always been confident now had depression and helplessness packed into her dark eyes. Nothing could be seen in those black pupils, like the entrance to a well boiled with the darkness of thought.

It was empty loss and terrible solitude.

“It’s okay. Lorian will soon return to her old self.”

Netionpis repeated only those words. He told the servants, and Yernia too, not to worry.

At a glance, it seemed like he was encouraging those around him. However, he underestimated people’s empathic abilities. Most humans noticed the essence of his repeated encouragement.

Netionpis’s assurance was a defense mechanism for himself. It was a kind of self-motivation. Only by doing so could he live in a world where Lorian had lost her light.

But the world thrusts a surprisingly cruel reality upon one person. It mercilessly shatters a heart as thin as a thinly gilded piece of glass.

That incident caused the last something supporting Netionpis to snap. It was enough despair to completely crumble him, who was barely maintaining the form of a human.

Imperial Year 19. The 2nd Empress Yernia Euglinas. Deceased.

It was a tragedy three years after Lorian’s stillbirth.

◇

It was maternal death due to difficult childbirth. Perhaps it was a future already promised from the moment Yernia became pregnant.

She was predicted to have a short life. It’s not strange that the life force consumed during childbirth exceeded her limit. Or if not that, it might have been a truly unfortunate accident.

If so, Lorian was lucky, and Yernia was unlucky. That was the only difference.

“Ah… Aah… Yernia… Yeni…”

He didn’t meet Yernia’s child during the state funeral. No, he chose not to. He simply couldn’t bear to see the child.

Human emotions push away reason and advocate irrationality. Netionpis knew this but couldn’t resist.

He knew the newborn child was innocent. He understood and acknowledged everything. Yet he couldn’t erase the delusion that the child had killed and devoured the lovely Yernia, taking her breath.

He felt to the bone that understanding and empathy were completely separate domains.

After Lorian’s stillbirth, Yernia became an even more special existence. Astel’s trace. His only daughter. His only family. A precious value that fueled his life.

“Yernia… Yeni…”

Lorian still remained in seclusion. She didn’t show her face even at Yernia’s funeral. He understood completely. Because he was Lorian’s family. Because he was her loved one.

Yes, because he understood. He would not lose any more. Even if the whole world imposed irrationality, he had to establish the right to refuse. Just like Astelnerca who shattered fate with his two fists and pioneered.

He would make life his own.

“Lorian.”

He took Lorian’s hand. Cold and smooth. A slender flower bud so thin that the joints were clearly visible. Still beautiful.

No matter how beautiful a dancer might be, she couldn’t be more beautiful than this.

“I won’t be able to visit for a while. I have something to do. I’ve left family matters to the steward. I’ve also borrowed Chester’s personnel as inspectors just in case, so don’t worry.”

Still, there was no answer.

“I’ll find the answer for us in the world.”

“…”

“When that time comes, we’ll be able to laugh and talk like before. Like in the old days when Astel was here and Yeni was cute…”

He reverently kissed the back of her hand. Lorian was as still as an abandoned wooden statue.

It was enough.

He had long grown accustomed to not expecting a farewell.

“I will, definitely, save you.”

He would willingly walk the path of defying heaven, tearing apart a thousand miles and going against the natural order. Because it was a journey to restore your praiseworthy light, no one else’s.

Even if some barrier constrains your heart. Even if the world drives you to be a shaman. I alone will see you correctly. I will be on your side even if I have to bear the karma of mortal enemies. I will go to meet the shining you, even if it takes a lifetime.

Their joined hands separated. Lorian’s hand sank into the soft sheet with a plop. He should have conveyed what he wanted to say concisely, but one unspoken word screamed inside his mouth.

He opened and closed his lips. That word trying to take shape, that resentment distorting the shape of his mouth, kept yearning for the outside.

“… Lorian.”

One word softly contained in firm resolve scattered futilely into the air.