Ch.64I Had Lost Too Much Blood, and Nearly

So, I talked with Millia for a while.

She said Demian’s treatment was almost complete. He was still bedridden only because he had lost so much blood.

Apparently, he would be able to get up and move around freely by tomorrow.

Unlike me.

I was still in a state where even turning my head was difficult.

Surely they must have poured healing miracles on me.

Well, I suppose my condition was that serious. When I collapsed after cutting down Natalya, I truly thought I might die.

“…so…now…”

Millia’s words became increasingly disjointed as I heard them.

Perhaps it was because I was lying in bed, exhausted and unable to move.

Once again, a deep fatigue pressed down on my consciousness.

“……”

“…on the island, there’s also a rumor that…”

My eyelids felt heavy.

My consciousness flickered in and out repeatedly.

Perhaps noticing that I wasn’t responding, Millia stopped talking.

“Tired? Well, I suppose you would be. Let’s just rest for now.”

I really had so many more questions to ask, but I couldn’t hold on any longer.

“Sleep well, Haschal.”

My consciousness sank back into darkness.

=======[Dream?]=======

I dream.

As always.

Countless incomprehensible images pass by me in succession.

A one-eyed old man sitting on a throne, commanding two birds, looking down at me.

A woman bringing lush greenery to an endless expanse of land.

A snow-white girl receiving something from that woman.

And thirteen meteors falling from the sky.

The world gradually darkens.

The dream slowly transforms.

Into a nightmare.

In a world turned black, only one being remained.

A beast growling, bound by countless gray chains.

Its massive body, so vast it blocked the sky, cast shadows across the entire earth.

It was closer to a fur-covered mountain range.

A red lake had formed beneath the beast’s feet.

Sharp spikes at the ends of the chains dug into the beast’s body, holding it in place.

It was truly an iron straitjacket and a gigantic leash.

The beast howled at the empty sky.

Could a thousand thunderbolts striking simultaneously compare to this roar?

The world trembled.

And then.

Light fell from the sky.

A dazzling radiance descended, illuminating the world and embracing the bleeding beast like a veil.

The spikes touched by the light were gradually pulled out.

As the gray chains were removed, the white holy light gradually changed its form.

Nothing had really changed.

Because it too was a chain.

================

When I opened my eyes again, Millia was already gone.

Instead, a woman I’d never seen before was looking down at me.

No. Perhaps not for the first time.

Sapphire eyes like a winter lake sparkled.

Long eyelashes half-covered those eyes. Like snow-covered ice settling on the water’s surface.

Pure white hair without a single blemish flowed down her cheeks, casting shadows on her face.

She was a delicate and beautiful woman, like a porcelain doll.

A golden chain-shaped tiara. Spotless white holy robes.

An outfit I had seen dozens of times.

The Holy Maiden candidate of the Church of Elpinel, Lacy Elmaine Stardolf.

“You’re awake, Aishan-Gioro Princess.”

She quietly spoke as our eyes met.

Her voice was businesslike, making it difficult to discern her emotions.

I was simply bewildered by this unexpected meeting.

I had planned to visit her someday, but I hadn’t expected her to come to me first.

Why would someone who must be busy with relief efforts be here?

“This is fortunate. I was wondering if I would have to keep waiting until you woke up.”

“Who are you…?”

I cautiously let my words trail off.

I didn’t need to try—my voice was already half-submerged anyway.

“That white hair. I’ve heard about it somewhere…”

I decided to act as if I didn’t know her.

It would be strange to immediately recognize someone I’d never met before.

Even with such distinctive features.

“I’m Lacy Stardolf of the Church of Elpinel. Your senior.”

“The Holy Maiden candidate…?”

“So you know. Yes, that’s right.”

Lacy nodded lightly.

“Why would someone like you…”

“Naturally, I came to check on a critical patient. Your survival was a miracle. And now that you’re awake, I have something to tell you.”

With a slight movement, Lacy sat down in the chair beside me.

The holy symbol around her neck swayed.

Her face remained expressionless. Unusually so.

Wasn’t she supposed to have a more benevolent personality in the original work…?

While she did show unwavering resolve as a battle priest during fights, wasn’t she normally the type to say things like “Even other races need the hand of salvation”?

A bitter smile escaped me.

Original work? I had decided not to believe in such things anymore.

Look where believing got me.

…Anyway, she said she had something to tell me.

I don’t know what it is, but judging by the fact that she sat down, it seems the conversation will be lengthy.

I cleared my throat slightly to prepare for a proper conversation.

“Critical patient. Was my condition that serious?”

“You were a corpse.”

Huh…?

The answer that came back was more blunt and shocking than I expected.

I stared at her with my mouth hanging open.

“To be precise, you were about 90% a corpse. Lacerations and penetrating wounds all over your body. Your face and lungs were burned, and your spleen and pancreas had burst out completely. Almost all your muscles were torn, and the blood loss goes without saying. It’s incomprehensible how you could move in that condition.”

Indeed, if what she says is true, those are injuries that should have prevented not just fighting, but living at all.

During the battle, my body moved as if possessed, but normally I should have collapsed and died midway.

Even I think it was close to a miracle.

Not a technique used by priests, but a literal miracle bestowed by the gods.

“Still, thanks to dozens of priests, including myself, pouring all kinds of healing arts into you, the external wounds were somehow healed.”

“Such injuries, healed? Is that even possible?”

“Well. You certainly should have died. It must be Elpinel’s care. Though the reason… I’m not sure.”

Lacy stroked her holy symbol. The golden cross sparkled in the ceiling light.

Elpinel’s care.

I recalled what Lena, who had treated me, had said. The grace of Saulite, wasn’t it?

Elpinel’s care, Saulite’s grace.

And… Volberg’s guidance.

For some reason, I kept being associated with the names of gods.

“Then why can’t I move my body…? I can’t feel anything either. You said I was healed?”

It was frustrating that I could only move my neck despite my best efforts.

I could barely feel anything below that.

“That’s because only your external wounds have barely been healed. Your depleted vitality hasn’t returned, so it’s only natural.”

“Vitality?”

“Life force, you might call it—the formless power that keeps a person alive. Separate from physical wounds, you had completely exhausted it.”

Come to think of it, Millia said the same thing.

That I had used too much vitality.

Was it not simply that my body was exhausted from overexertion?

“Normally, even if we had treated you, you would have died soon after. Like an elderly person whose lifespan has run out.”

Hmm… I remember reading a similar concept in a book before…

Right. Was it called true essence?

This world doesn’t have internal energy, so I’m surprised such a concept exists.

“That’s why I came to check, but fortunately, your vitality is slowly being replenished. What an incredibly resilient life, almost like…”

Lacy trailed off, then cleared her throat.

As if she had almost blurted out something she shouldn’t have said.

“Anyway, you’ll remain in that state for a while. Sensation will gradually return, but it will take about a month before you can move properly.”

“A month… that’s too long.”

“It’s actually short. You could have been lying in a coffin for the rest of your life.”

Well, she’s not wrong when she puts it that way.

“I recommend you rest and avoid overexertion that could worsen your condition. You’ll likely be very busy after that month anyway.”

“Busy?”

“Yes. Remember I said I had something to tell you? That’s what I meant. Three letters have arrived for you.”

Lacy pulled out three sealed envelopes.

One decorated with elaborate gold leaf.

The other two were on rough paper with only simple seals stamped on them.

“Letters? Who are they from?”

“One from Landenburg, one from Faelrun. And this is an invitation from the Imperial House.”

“The Imperial House? My goodness.”

“Rumors about you have spread everywhere after what happened. It makes sense that the Imperial House would take interest and summon you.”

Rumors. Come to think of it, Millia mentioned something about rumors too.

I wonder what they contain. I hope they’re not about me being a savior or hero or anything like that.

I don’t deserve such praise.

“What kind of rumors? Can you tell me?”

“Hmm…”

Lacy fell into contemplation.

What could the content be to cause such a reaction?

“About three kinds. Good rumors, bad rumors, and strange rumors.”

“…Three different kinds?”

“Yes. First, the good rumors are about your exploits. Stories of a young female knight with a blue sword who defeated most of the Werebeasts and saved dozens of academy students. They say a new Master has undoubtedly appeared in the Empire.”

Saved dozens… I did. But twenty thousand died. Because of me.

No, because of the Werebeasts.

Yes, it was the Werebeasts’ fault. That’s how I should think about it.

If the Werebeasts hadn’t existed in this world, such a thing wouldn’t have happened.

The problem was the Werebeasts who chose slaughter over harmony and peace.

If only they hadn’t existed, I would have…

I rationalize myself again. I had to.

I stopped my thoughts from turning negative.

Perhaps it was the passage of time, or the peaceful air of the hospital room.

At least the emotional turmoil I felt then had subsided considerably.

Yes. Eventually it will become easier. Just as any nightmare fades from memory with time.

I just need to do what I have to do. What I must do.

…Was it what I had to do?

It was certainly something only I could do. But was it this desperate from the beginning?

Questions lead to doubts.

I want to save people.

That much was certain.

It’s just… the reason was a bit blurry.

What was it again?

Was it because of the screams of people massacred under my orders?

Was it because of the eyes of the woman who became a slave?

Because they stare at me in my nightmares every time I dream?

No. That’s not it.

Those reasons might be part of it. But it wasn’t just that.

Then was it because of the difficulty? As more people died, the difficulty of the original work increased?

Because the world might really end?

This also seems a bit strange.

It’s a rational reason, but is it really because of this?

It was a peculiar feeling.

Like something had been cut out from the middle—a mindset with results but no process.

Why, exactly?

“…Aishan-Gioro Princess?”

Lacy cautiously called out, seemingly puzzled.

The person who had asked to hear the rumors was now sitting with her eyes closed, wearing a serious expression. Of course she would find it strange.

I cleared the thoughts from my mind.

Yes, what does the reason matter? I can do it, and I must do it.

Everyone will die if I don’t anyway.

“Ah, right. I was just thinking about something else. Continue. What are the bad rumors?”

Let’s continue the conversation.

“The bad rumors say that the person who performed those feats is the Spear of Ka’har, no, the Villainess of Ka’har. Some say it’s just a territorial dispute between beasts, others suspect you must have some ulterior motive.”

Well, I expected that kind of reaction.

I would have been suspicious too. If anything, these rumors are more moderate than I anticipated.

The good news, on the other hand, felt burdensome, like having lead weights placed on me.

“…And the strange rumors?”

“That a monster made of blood and entrails appeared on the island and devoured the Werebeasts. This also seems to be about you?”

“……”

I had nothing to say.