Ch.5Hero Agency (5)

The healing ability of a saint is truly remarkable. It’s not just about healing injuries, but creating something from nothing.

Even someone who has fainted from electric shock can immediately regain consciousness with just one healing from a saint.

“Didn’t you say you’d trust me because we’ve been comrades for years? Then why did I get electrocuted?”

“…”

“So you have nothing to say?”

“I don’t think it’s my fault.”

“It’s okay. We all make mistakes. By the way, I have a technique I want to practice too. Could you help me?”

Agath said while holding a huge hammer. Was that what they called a warhammer?

“…What technique are you planning to practice?”

“Skull crushing.”

“Let’s talk this through…”

—WHAM!

The massive hammer struck Leo’s pinky toe with such force that the floor shook.

Leo collapsed to the floor, clutching his toe.

“AAAAGH!”

“By the way, that’s the name of this technique.”

“Did you have to smash it without any warning?”

“Someone electrocuted me without warning, so I thought it was okay.”

“…”

What you do eventually comes back to you. That’s the perfect expression for this situation.

But I’ve done nothing wrong and lived a normal life, so why am I in this ridiculous situation? The more I think about it, the more unfair it seems.

Anyway, Leo grumbled as he hopped on one foot to Rebecca.

“Rebecca, please heal me.”

“Sure.”

Holy light gathered around his pinky toe, and in an instant, it was completely healed.

—WHAM!

And that pinky toe was smashed by the hammer again.

“ARGH! What are you doing, you crazy woman!”

“Skull crushing.”

“So why are you doing it again this time?”

“Don’t know. Just felt like it.”

“…I’ll endure it because I know what I did.”

Once again, the holy light gathered…

—WHAM!

Before the prayer could finish, Leo’s other pinky toe was smashed.

“Ugh… sh… that really hurts…”

He muttered quietly, seemingly having adapted to the pain.

Was that pain something one could adapt to? I never got used to stubbing my pinky toe on doors no matter how many times it happened.

“So why did you do it this time?”

“For your information, I’ve lost consciousness three times today.”

“…This is ridiculous.”

That must be their way of joking around. In the world I came from, it would be like friends hitting each other on the head and running away.

…What nonsense am I thinking? Even as a joke, who would crack someone’s head or crush their toes?

But if this isn’t a joke, that’s a serious problem in its own way…

“What should we have for dinner tonight?”

Leo, whose toe was completely healed, asked quietly. Agath responded with a trembling voice.

“Let’s just order something instead of doing anything weird.”

“Isn’t it a bit much to order delivery every day? We’ve been eating delivery food for two weeks straight. We should have home-cooked meals sometimes.”

“I’m sorry! I went too far just now! So please stop!”

“I can easily make simple dishes, so don’t worry.”

Rebecca and Agath despaired as they watched Leo walk away.

“Looks like we’ll have to go hungry today.”

“…Should I just crush his toe again?”

“How bad could it possibly be?”

“It’s edible, but it tastes so awful you can’t eat it…”

“What Leo makes is closer to some twisted abomination from hell than actual food.”

They must be exaggerating. No matter how bad someone is at cooking, it can’t be that terrible, right?

***

I’m not usually one to swear. Swearing often leads to things going badly, so I try to avoid it.

I’ve seen countless cases where casual swearing between close friends nearly led to fights. So I try my best to refrain from swearing.

“What the fuck is this?”

But seeing the state of the food, curses spontaneously escape my mouth. What is this purple liquid emitting such a horrible smell?

While pondering this question and staring at this disgusting thing, Leo explained what he had done.

“I just made a simple kimchi stew.”

“…This is kimchi stew?”

“Yeah, but it tastes good.”

I couldn’t bring myself to touch that food. What kind of monstrous act would turn the broth such a horrific color?

And what are those blood-red lumps floating around? Is that supposed to be meat?

Still, I should taste it before judging.

“Holy shit…”

I just gained a trauma I’ll never forget in my life. The moment I tasted this thing.

How can anyone make something this terrible? Just serving plain kimchi would taste much better than this.

“You did pretty well today…”

Agath said while forcing down something vaguely resembling food.

“…This is considered good?”

“Yeah… at least it’s edible…”

“How is this edible in any way?”

“I think it’s delicious.”

Leo said while happily eating this revolting, twisted something.

“…Why did you let Leo cook in the first place?”

“Among us, Leo is actually the best cook…”

“You can make something that tastes even worse than this?”

“Last time Rebecca cooked, the kitchen caught fire.”

“…”

“And when I tried cooking, the entire house burned down and the fire department had to come.”

I can’t help but laugh at how absurd this is. So there’s an even deeper bottom beneath rock bottom.

I silently got up and headed to the kitchen.

“Let me borrow the kitchen for a moment.”

Before coming to this world, I didn’t cook often. I actually avoided it because it was bothersome.

But I can easily handle the basics. I’m confident I could make something much better than that monstrosity even with my eyes closed.

So I made a “normal” kimchi stew, red in color with properly cooked meat. Everyone gave brief reviews after tasting it.

“It’s delicious.”

“Well made.”

“Top-tier wife material! You’re ready for marriage right now!”

“Isn’t it just that you all are incredibly bad at cooking?”

After eating that bizarre thing earlier, anything would taste delicious.

The ingredients in the refrigerator were such high quality that they would taste good even raw. It would be hard to ruin this even if you tried.

While enjoying a decent dinner, Agath spoke with admiration.

“Could I ask you to keep cooking for us? Once you taste something like this, you can never go back…”

“I was planning to do it anyway, even if you didn’t ask.”

Isn’t it annoying to cook every day? I’d rather cook for the rest of my life than eat that abomination.

“Perfect wife material, top-tier female.”

“Suddenly I don’t feel like cooking anymore.”

“I’m sorry! I won’t say things like that anymore! Please forgive me!”

Agath prostrated herself on the floor, begging perfectly.

Thanks to establishing overwhelming superiority in cooking among these people, I probably won’t have to worry about being attacked anymore.

If I gradually increase my influence like this, I should be able to persuade them to cooperate in the final battle against the Demon King.

After dinner, I went to my room. My impression of the room is… empty.

The room is very spacious, but with only a bed and a wardrobe, it feels particularly barren.

…What about clothes?

I thought all basic needs were taken care of, but only food and shelter are resolved.

I should borrow some money tomorrow to buy clothes to replace this awful outfit. For tops, something that doesn’t reveal my figure at all, and for bottoms, just regular long pants should be fine.

Now for the remaining time, I could browse some community sites…

Of course, I was reincarnated into this world. So naturally, I don’t have a mobile phone or computer.

I might as well just go to sleep…

***

Night ends and morning arrives. It’s almost time for school, so I should get up and prepare.

I had such a strange dream. A dream where I was sent to another world to save it.

All my supposed comrades were crazy, and I even suffered a gender change in this terrible nightmare.

With these thoughts, I opened my eyes to see an unfamiliar room.

…Am I still dreaming?

I pinched the back of my hand and it hurt a little. No, it shouldn’t hurt. I’m definitely not in pain. So this must be a dream.

…Suddenly, a major problem arose.

I need to use the bathroom.

The thought of asking for help with such an issue makes me want to die of embarrassment.

Besides, there’s no one to help me. Rebecca still feels awkward, and Agath… I absolutely shouldn’t ask her for help.

…Let’s go to the bathroom first and think about it later. Hopefully, I won’t run into anyone.

I opened the door and went outside, only to make eye contact with Leo, who was enthusiastically writing something.

“You’re up?”

“…Yes.”

My face is burning intensely. I haven’t done anything wrong, so why am I so embarrassed?

I hurried to the bathroom with my head down.

***

I managed to take care of business without incident, but I’m still dying of embarrassment.

And I could now confirm with certainty that I had indeed transformed into a woman. Because of this, I’ve completely lost all my energy.

Maybe if I just die again, I could go to a world where there’s only mint chocolate? I’m convinced that would be happier than here now.

“Don’t step on that.”

As I was walking listlessly, I almost accidentally stepped on papers scattered messily on the floor.

Something is densely written on them, but I have no idea what it means. Probably something related to magic.

“I’ll make breakfast now.”

I headed to the kitchen, avoiding the papers on the floor, to prepare breakfast.

***

By the time breakfast was ready, everyone was waiting at the table.

When I brought out the food, Agath and Rebecca happily exclaimed.

“To think we can eat delicious home-cooked meals every day from now on… this isn’t a dream, right?”

“Now we don’t have to worry about going hungry anymore.”

Leo was quietly eating while continuing to write something.

What kind of lives have these people been living…?

“By the way, could you lend me some money?”

“Why do you need money all of a sudden?”

“I only have this one set of clothes, so I want to buy new ones.”

Suddenly, Agath smiled wickedly.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can lend you money. I have something urgent to spend it on.”

“What is it?”

“I need to buy clothes for you.”

There’s no such thing as a free lunch in this world. There must be some hidden agenda. And a very wicked one at that.

“I get to choose the clothes, right?”

“I’ll be the one choosing.”

“If that’s how it’s going to be, I won’t cook anymore.”

“Then you’ll have to wear that one outfit for the rest of your life.”

I thought I had the upper hand here. But that was completely wrong.

They have the advantage over me in every area except cooking. So my chances of winning are almost zero.

“…What kind of clothes are you planning to choose?”

“Obviously, feminine clothes that suit your body.”

I want to refuse and say absolutely not, but I have no choice but to accept this bitter pill.

Life really isn’t worth living.