Ch.55Chapter 55. Voyeurism (2)

At first, I found him repulsive.

A man who had served time for rape and murder charges, then shamelessly received a special pardon…

Every time I faced him, I felt like I might throw up.

That image changed when I first visited his home.

He was raising a child who was like a wild animal.

Like taming a wild animal.

Keeping his distance, slowly.

He was giving affection in his own way.

I thought, even this heinous person is human after all.

And when I became convinced he had been falsely accused, I started to feel a bit sorry for him.

Until then, I felt nothing beyond sympathy.

Pretending to be his lover was just part of my mission.

I only thought of coaxing and soothing him as a stepping stone for my promotion.

My thoughts about him really began to change when I looked through his notebook.

-Day 102 of detention investigation. My daughter died. She was hit by a truck. I only learned about it when my wife visited me the day after the accident.

-Day 106 of detention investigation. My wife was going insane. She visited me every day and cried. I could only feel sorry that I couldn’t reach out to her through the acrylic barrier.

-Day 129 of detention investigation. My wife died

Though his sentences were generally restrained emotionally, descriptions about his wife were especially sparse.

At first, I thought they might have had a bad relationship, but I quickly realized that wasn’t the case.

He loved his wife.

How much did he love her…

Enough to give up everything after she died.

Enough to throw away the four months he had endured to prove his innocence and give false testimony.

Perhaps he still loves his dead wife.

That’s why he doesn’t want to get close to me…

He only looks for casual one-night stands.

He probably avoids serious relationships with women.

Back then, it was probably something like a competitive spirit.

Childishly, I wanted to win.

I wanted to beat that woman who had occupied his heart for ten years.

I wanted to fulfill the motherly role that woman couldn’t complete.

I wanted to help him forget her.

I wanted to free him from his pain.

I wanted to fill the void his dead wife left behind.

I wanted to fill his empty heart completely with myself.

By this point, I had to admit it.

I was in love.

“Mmm… chu…”

I surrendered to my instincts.

I hope he doesn’t think I’m too loose…

But there was no time to worry about that.

I was already lying on top of him, exploring his lips.

The taste of our first kiss…

Honestly, I’m not sure.

It was just soft.

Even this rough man has soft lips.

I felt like I’d discovered a weakness.

“Mmph?!”

Just as I was about to pull away because I was running out of breath.

That large palm grabbed the back of my head…

I couldn’t resist.

I had no choice but to welcome his invading tongue, unable to move.

Wait, wasn’t it supposed to be a gentle kiss after a hug…

This kind of kiss is cheating.

This means he wants to go all the way.

I should push him away.

I never intended to give my first time to such a barbaric man.

But my hands were clutching his collar, unable to let go.

“Ahh… mmm.”

My body was lifted up.

With one hand holding the back of my head and the other around my waist, he was raising himself up.

Does he prefer doing it sitting down…

I surrendered myself to him, straddling his thighs.

Slick, wet sounds.

Our tongues intertwined and saliva mixed, making vulgar noises.

I made the mistake of accidentally biting his tongue, but he wasn’t flustered at all and instead pushed in deeper.

I forgot to breathe.

Actually, even if I had realized, there was nothing I could do.

His strong hands were holding my head as if he would never let go.

“Mmph?!”

Something hard pressed against my lower abdomen.

At first I flinched in surprise, but I didn’t feel any further aversion.

I was a little happy that I had made him excited.

So this man isn’t impotent after all.

But as it swelled and reached up to my navel…

Well… by then I was a little scared.

“Puha…”

Did he read my mind?

He pulled his lips away.

Saliva stretched like a spider web before breaking and dripping down.

“Huff… haa… haa…”

For a long time, we stared into each other’s eyes, breathing heavily.

I didn’t want to say it out loud.

I know men like it when women say vulgar things, but it was too embarrassing.

I wanted him to do everything forcefully on his own.

But I knew perfectly well that this man couldn’t do that.

I knew he couldn’t force himself on me.

The idiot needs a sign of consent just to sleep with one woman…

“It’s okay… it’s fine…”

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and whispered in his ear.

It was an indirect expression, but I didn’t think I could say it twice.

That’s how embarrassed I was.

Too shy to look him in the eyes, I buried my face in his neck.

Sniff, sniff.

I always thought all sweat smelled terrible.

But this man’s scent somehow made me feel secure.

“Juliane.”

“Eek?!”

His deep voice flowed directly into my ear.

I shuddered at that whisper, feeling goosebumps.

His breath felt like it would devour my ear at any moment.

Now he’ll say something obscene and take me like a dog.

He’ll ravage me with that ferocious thing that’s twitching against my lower abdomen.

Or maybe this man will be gentle and kind.

I’d prefer it rough though…

But he wouldn’t know that unless I said it.

This man is an idiot who doesn’t understand women’s hearts at all.

A fool who gets excited when a woman who won’t even tell him her name or phone number openly flirts with him.

“J-Jinsoo.”

“…”

“You don’t have to hold back.”

“…”

“Do whatever you want. As much as you want… to your heart’s content…”

I was so embarrassed that I hugged him tightly.

I really couldn’t show my face right now.

It must be a complete mess.

“Juliane.”

“Yesss…”

Once again, a soft whisper reached my ears.

Was he deliberately making me wait to tease me?

If so, it was working.

At first, I just wanted to excite this man.

Now I was the one going crazy with desire.

Even my fear of his size had disappeared.

I just wanted him to do it quickly.

I wanted him to stir my insides.

I wanted him to thrust all the way in… to the deepest parts where fingers couldn’t reach.

I wanted him to fill me completely.

I wanted him to pin me down and drive me crazy…

“Cuss is watching from behind.”

“Mmm?!”

Those thoughts shattered instantly.

What did he say?

For a moment, I thought I’d misheard.

“I think that’s enough for today. Let’s separate slowly. Naturally.”

“Yes…”

I lifted my legs and got off him.

Looking at the bulge in his pants, I swallowed hard.

Wow… it’s so big…

I’d seen his tent before, but seeing it up close was absolutely intimidating.

Would all of that even fit inside?

It’s my first time…

“…”

When I turned around, I saw the door was slightly ajar.

Cuss had already fled and wasn’t visible.

She had been watching everything until just now… everything…

I didn’t feel particularly embarrassed.

It felt like it was okay for Cuss to see.

Showing her that I was this close with her dad…

It even felt thrilling somehow.

Maybe it wouldn’t be bad to do the deed while Cuss secretly watched?

“Excuse me.”

Jinsoo stood up abruptly, opened the door with a creak, and headed to Cuss’s room.

When I followed him quietly, sure enough, Cuss was tightly wrapped in her blanket with her eyes squeezed shut.

When I checked earlier, she had definitely kicked off her blanket…

She was so cute I couldn’t even be angry.

I could only smile.

“What a shame. It’s getting late. You should go now.”

“Ah, yes…”

Pushed by Jinsoo’s smiling hand on my back, I found myself at the front door.

By this point, I had only one thought in my mind.

I want to go to a motel.

I want to go to a motel.

I want to go to a motel.

I want to go to a motel and continue where we left off.

I only just realized that some moist liquid was running down my thighs.

Unable to control my heavy breathing, I looked up at Jinsoo, who was wearing a bitter smile.

“I understand how you feel. But I have to go to work tomorrow, so it would be difficult.”

“Just for a little… just a little while…”

“The problem is, I can’t do ‘just a little while.’ Take care going home.”

“Yes…”

In the end, I had no choice but to leave the house, waving goodbye to Jinsoo.

If he can’t do ‘just a little while’…

It’s not even that late, but if it would interfere with work tomorrow…

Just how long does he plan to go at it?

When that thought crossed my mind, my face burned as if it might explode.

I staggered to my car and got in.

Damn it. All that teasing for nothing…

“Taffer.”

“Yes, Juliane.”

“Go to sleep quickly.”

“Yes, understood. Switching to sleep mode.”

I also switched the windows to opaque mode.

Now there are no eyes watching.

Normally I would hold back…

No matter how aroused I felt, I would hold back, but right now I couldn’t.

I slowly unzipped my jeans and pulled them open.

Soft red underwear was revealed.

I slid my fingers inside my underwear.

It was already wet.

Since it’s already wet, might as well make it wetter, right?

I moved my middle finger and…

“Ahh…!”

Satisfied my frustration.