Ch.54Chapter 10. What Can Be Done (1)

After ending the broadcast, I stood still for a while.

My fingertips trembled slightly.

I heaved a rough breath as my shoulders shuddered.

“That was an excellent speech.”

James said.

“This will change public opinion somewhat. There have always been many Earth people who don’t trust the government or police. No, that’s true for every nation spread throughout this galaxy. Only fools blindly follow authority.”

It seemed a bit strange for him to say that, considering he himself would be counted among that ‘authority’ if divided by rank…

Then again, James was a businessman, not a politician or minister. Thinking about how even the wealthiest businessmen in this country still bow before members of parliament, perhaps he wasn’t as high-ranking as I thought.

It was only because I happened to be beneath him that James seemed to occupy such a lofty position.

“The broadcast went through properly, right?”

“Yes. I have confidence in my abilities.”

“…Why couldn’t Chairman Hyun stop it?”

“Because he was someone who had never been in the field. He probably thought he was clever. But he couldn’t think of things that can only be considered by someone who’s been in the field. He was in a position where he only needed to tell his subordinates what to do.”

And I had scared away the people in this building.

How could people have escaped so cleanly?

Perhaps a few coincidences overlapped.

I didn’t want to kill people, so I scared away those gathered in the first-floor shopping mall first.

Some staff members probably came down early to help those people escape.

And other buildings of this company had already exploded because of “me,” causing casualties. Since I was also the one who broke in here, many people probably thought something similar could happen again, even if they didn’t know the full context.

Whether the government turned a blind eye or not, both the Federation and the company had to care about public opinion at minimum. They would have conducted evacuation drills, even if just for show.

James had predicted those evacuation drills in advance.

“He probably thought it was enough. After all, he had hidden so many troops here. These Kaijin could only move because you came, right?”

James deliberately emphasized that they moved because of me, as if wanting to see my reaction.

The circuits began to operate in response to my energy.

The restraints that had firmly bound the Kaijin’s bodies immediately became armor that enhanced their power, effectively setting them free.

Somehow I managed to carry the plan through to the end, but I had nearly been caught without accomplishing anything.

“Those who think only with their heads don’t understand variables in the field. They think the world will roll along as their clever minds predict, and they devise ‘clean’ methods to handle various variables—but well, variables don’t always emerge in the way we’d prefer.”

I stared at James.

He had a very satisfied look on his face.

Come to think of it, James always came to the field to directly command the combatants, despite being a high-ranking executive who had a place in this headquarters building.

I thought he was just blinded by the glory, but that wasn’t it.

Well, since his subordinates were just hired with money, they might not work properly without direct supervision.

If even one person capable of thinking had remained here, the plan would have been much more difficult.

If they had destroyed the broadcasting room, for instance.

“Well, the job is finished now. All that remains is to escape—”

James’s gaze shifted behind me.

“—but before that, do you have anything you’d like to discuss? At least there doesn’t seem to be any intention to attack. We might have a few minutes.”

“…”

That’s right.

I had been consciously avoiding looking behind me.

Hayun is standing behind me. My face was showing on the screen, but Hayun’s face wasn’t visible. She happened to be standing exactly behind me, a little distance away.

Hayun helped me. So did the other magical girls who followed her.

Why?

I still couldn’t understand. From a magical girl’s perspective, I should be a terrorist who must be captured.

No, that’s not it.

The magical girls were there too. They could easily deduce that what happened wasn’t my doing.

Then the only reason left is that they simply acted for the Federation.

They hadn’t actively protested against anyone, and they’d never acted for me before, so why was today different?

Not knowing that made me afraid to turn around and look at Hayun.

What would I think when I saw her face?

What expression would Hayun make when she saw me?

I… wasn’t ready to accept everything yet. Even if Hayun suddenly treated me kindly here—which is what I wanted—

—at the same time, I didn’t want to accept it right away.

I wanted to be angry a little longer. I wanted to rampage. I wanted to hate those who hated me.

The situation was desperate, but ironically, I felt free rampaging within it. When I swung the hammer, I didn’t have to think about anything.

Hayun was waiting.

She didn’t urge me by calling my name, nor did she turn away in disappointment. She was simply waiting for me to look her way.

Should I run away now?

Like I’ve always done.

But I knew I shouldn’t do that.

I looked at James.

James was curling up the corners of his mouth. He was smiling. At me, with my serious expression, contemplating this trivial choice of ‘turning around.’

Isn’t he a sadist who enjoys seeing me irritated and in pain? That hamster.

Annoyed by his expression, I turned around.

Hayun was there.

The other magical girls weren’t visible.

They probably hadn’t left yet. They must be waiting for us to talk.

More precisely, they were waiting “as Hayun wanted.”

“…”

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

Then I opened them.

Before my eyes was Hayun.

She was a mess. I thought she might even be worse off than me. Torn up, bruised, and bleeding all over, yet Hayun stood there.

Standing, looking at me.

What should I say?

Should I thank her? After all, I was able to be here despite my many emotional mistakes, able to achieve my goal, thanks to the help of Hayun and the magical girls.

Even if they hadn’t left, could I have taken down so many Kaijin alone? Could I have pleaded my innocence and issued warnings on the broadcast?

No, I probably couldn’t have.

Whether I went to the orphanage or not, I would have failed.

I succeeded because Hayun and her colleagues came here. They helped me without even asking what I was trying to do.

But, even so.

I couldn’t bring myself to say thank you. The words seemed stuck in my throat, unable to come out.

Instead.

“…Why?”

That’s the question I ended up asking.

It wasn’t because I was embarrassed or uncomfortable with the situation, saying something I didn’t mean—

It was because I truly didn’t know.

“Why did you help me?”

At my question, Hayun’s expression crumbled a little.

“I’m your enemy, aren’t I?”

That’s right. The magical girls probably came here to arrest me. There would be no other reason for them to come.

These girls didn’t know that Kaijin were hidden on this top floor.

“You belong to the Galactic Federation. So… shouldn’t you not be helping with this kind of thing?”

My warning wasn’t directed only at this company’s chairman.

Those who drove me to this point. Whether government or Federation bastards. I couldn’t deal with all of them, but I wanted to strike down their superiors at least once.

And magical girls exist to prevent such things from happening.

“Why? Why did you go this far?”

“…”

Hayun’s gaze dropped.

That’s not what I wanted.

I wish she would speak more properly.

I was jealous. Jealous of Hayun, who received support from people in any situation because she was on the side of justice.

And for using a wonderful power that suited the protagonist of hope, not something gloomy like despair.

I’ve often thought how nice it would be if I had been born as Hayun rather than this parentless body.

And so, I wanted to win.

I didn’t want to hurt her, but.

So, I wish she would speak more properly, without hedging.

It’s something I can’t do.

If only Hayun would speak first.

Saying everything would be fine. That from now on, she would act for me. That we should smash the Galactic Federation and everything else together. That she would help me get revenge.

It would be nice if she said that.

Hayun didn’t say anything.

“…”

And, at the same time, I hoped she wouldn’t.

I wish you would stay on the opposite side. I wish I had a reason to be hostile to you.

So we could confront each other. Because I want to win at least once.

It was a selfish thought.

Neither one nor the other, the kind of thought I would normally have.

A childish selfishness that would rebel no matter which option was chosen.

But Hayun chose neither of those two options.

Hayun, who had been silently bowing her head, handed something to me.

It was a pager.

The pager I had seen when I caught the alien stalker with Hayun last time.

“Oh ho.”

James, who was watching us, made such a sound as if finding it interesting.

*

“Why?”

Hayun couldn’t easily think of how to answer that question.

The reason was simple.

It was just because the other person was Jieun.

Then, does that mean she wouldn’t have done the same if it had been someone else?

If the person on this top floor wasn’t Jieun but someone else, and if that other person was in exactly the same situation as Jieun, would Hayun not have helped that person?

No. She would have. Definitely.

But at the same time, she might have tried to persuade them differently.

Moving like this brings no benefit. In the end, all that awaits is self-destruction.

Let me help you instead. I’ll help you achieve the best possible outcome, so let’s go together.

…These were things she couldn’t say to Jieun.

It was obvious.

Those were words one could say only because they didn’t know the person’s heart. Words one could say only because they hadn’t seen the person’s circumstances to the end, because they couldn’t empathize with the deepest parts of their heart.

To Hayun, Jieun wasn’t that kind of person.

What food she liked. What they did when they met outside on holidays. What menu she usually ordered at cafes, what kind of streets she liked.

What expression she made when she felt good. How she smiled when she laughed. What habits she had when trying to hold back tears during sad movies.

When walking beside Hayun, Jieun didn’t deliberately hold hands or link arms.

But she felt closer than children who naturally did such things without thinking.

That was because it was that comfortable.

Because she knew.

Because she knew that even without holding hands now, without linking arms, Jieun felt good walking together with her. Because she knew that Jieun thought being with Hayun was enjoyable—

So, purely logical arguments about what the law says, whether this is wrong or not, whether it’s justice or not—all those words shattered before that reason.

No matter how identical the appearance, no matter how identical the past and reasons, Hayun couldn’t have treated that identical person the way she treated Jieun.

Because she wouldn’t have known all those facts.

Because she wouldn’t even have thought that her heart ached every time she thought of Jieun.

Therefore, she couldn’t bring herself to speak.

Because Jieun’s expression was telling her not to.

…Self-destruction, was it?

Jieun’s life was already shattered into pieces. To the point where it was uncertain whether things could return to normal even after everything was over. Hayun felt that fact acutely. If it had been someone else, they wouldn’t have understood why she disappeared in the middle.

When something is already destroyed, what more is there to destroy? Jieun had nothing left to do but move toward the end.

She felt like she would burst into tears if she opened her mouth.

Because she knew it was she herself who had ruined the life of her dearest, most precious friend.

Because she thought she couldn’t be forgiven for everything just by saying she didn’t know.

“…”

Jieun is kind.

Even now, she was holding back her resentment and asking Hayun. What was all that treatment until now, and why this sudden change?

She wanted to apologize.

But was that okay?

Would it seem like she was trying to resolve all that painful time with just a single word of apology?

Hayun couldn’t even imagine how Jieun had spent that time. Where she had hidden, what she had eaten and how, how she had managed to sleep and wash.

No matter what she thought, it was the worst.

Because she definitely couldn’t have lived comfortably in a nice house, enjoying everything.

…Because she definitely couldn’t have lived like Hayun.

Unable to go to school, unable to meet people who were like family.

Was it okay to apologize without knowing any of that?

In the end, the choice Hayun could make was neither one nor the other.

Hayun abruptly extended her hand.

It was a pager. The one Hayun always carried. When magical girls had dangerous situations. Or when the Federation had tasks for them. They could communicate through that pager.

And only after extending her hand did she realize how foolish it was.

The pager contained location information. That was natural since it was used to call each other.

Giving this to Jieun was no different from trying to monitor her.

But.

“Oh ho.”

“James” reacted that way.

*

“We’ll take that.”

Hearing James speak, I turned around as if to say, what are you talking about?

It’s a pager. Won’t it be tracked?

“If we put it in subspace first, tracking will be impossible. Even if it were possible, at least it wouldn’t be where she is.”

That’s… not exactly wrong, but.

Actually, I’m not sure what this subspace is. Maybe it’s not even subspace, just hiding it somewhere in this vast universe.

At least I haven’t been fried by cosmic radiation when opening it so far, so it can’t be that dangerous.

“And if it’s a tracking device, I can remove it. I’ll make it so we can still receive calls while doing so. By routing through various networks, they won’t be able to track us immediately.”

What a jack of all trades.

Well, all the equipment I’ve been using was made by him anyway.

“…”

I turned back to look at Hayun again.

Hayun was still holding out the pager to me with her head bowed deeply.

I reached out and took the pager.

It was just a plastic button, nothing special.

After fiddling with it for a moment, I looked up at Hayun again.

I should say thank you.

But the words remained stuck in my throat, unable to come out.

“So…”

Instead, thinking with a cooler head, I said:

“What are you going to do now?”

That’s probably what Hayun wants to ask me too.

Actually, I had nothing to say if such a question came. I really had no plan now.

I thought this might be the end, which is why I said goodbye to Pang Pang before coming here.

So maybe I spoke first because I was afraid of standing there unable to answer, hesitating.

“I…”

Hayun opened her mouth.

Hayun often showed powerless expressions in front of me. When people deliberately ignored her, when she received attention from someone she wasn’t interested in, when everyone’s eyes were on her.

But those were Hayun’s everyday expressions.

When dressed as a magical girl like this, Hayun always sparkled. She always smiled at people even after difficult battles, always confident.

I had only ever seen that face of Hayun on TV. We’d faced each other in battle many times, but I was always busy running away after being defeated.

Watching that appearance, I was always jealous.

So I didn’t like it.

But I didn’t say anything about it. I don’t like this feeling either. It’s a feeling that’s just too self-centered.

…What I disliked most was that, as always, my feelings wouldn’t do as I wanted.

“I’ll do what I can do.”

Hayun said that and raised her head.

And finally looked straight at me.

“…”

Sparkling eyes.

She wasn’t smiling, but her eyes looked at me with strength.

Those eyes were the eyes of Hayun I always faced in battle.

“…Okay.”

That was my answer.

I stepped back.

I heard the sound of drones taking off. They must have been preparing while we were talking.

Should I say goodbye?

Should I say, see you again?

After hesitating, I decided to just look at Hayun until the end instead.

*

“…Are you okay?”

As she stared blankly at Jieun disappearing, such a voice came from behind.

It was Rose.

“…Yes.”

She had hesitated when asked to help Jieun, but in the end, she had followed and helped.

Not just Rose, but everyone else too.

“There will probably be a lot of criticism.”

“…I’m sorry.”

“It’s not something you should apologize for.”

Rose answered and then remained silent for a moment before speaking again.

“If you had told us from the beginning, none of this would have happened.”

No one present could deny those words.