Ch.5451 – Dual Perception

“Unfamiliar ceiling.”

Once this phrase had ranked second on my bucket list of things to say before dying, but now it had become a tiresome cliché I’d heard far too many times.

“Are you awake?”

A familiar, gentle voice reaches my ears.

As I listen, I feel my eyes starting to close again.

“Don’t fall back asleep just because you can.”

“Professor Cheon.”

“Yes?”

“Are you angry?”

“A little bit?”

“I see… I’ll try to pay you back quickly. But now that I’m officially an Academy student, I should get some tax deduction benefits.”

“I’m not talking about money.”

Professor Cheon gently tapped my arm, which had become bulky from multiple layers of cast.

“I wish you’d value your body a little more.”

Professor Cheon looked at me with a bitter expression.

My body, huh.

To be honest, I’m still confused.

Whether this is truly “my body.”

The body is controlled by the mind, but what we define as the mind is essentially part of the body too.

What exactly defines “me” as me?

Memories from my past life? There are countless spells that can manipulate memories.

Knowledge from my past life? Knowledge isn’t any different from memories. In terms of physical ability, my current body is actually superior.

Even personality-wise, I’ve changed in many ways.

Having experienced this once before in my previous life makes the disconnect less jarring, but sometimes I’m terrified by the extreme loneliness and emptiness that occasionally visits me.

Sometimes reality doesn’t feel real, more like an endless illusion cast by someone with a twisted hobby.

There are times when it feels like NoName is moving automatically like a game character set to auto-play, while I’ve become a detached observer.

I doubt everything in the world—light, sound, smell, taste—none of it feels like I’m the one experiencing it.

Discours de la méthode (Discourse on Method) page 34, line 21: “ie penſe donc ie ſuis” (I think, therefore I am)?

What good is just thinking? I have no idea where I exist.

The more I think about it, the less I care about my body.

Because I can only exist as myself through relationships with others.

Sometimes I’m overwhelmed by anxiety that if I were stranded on a deserted island, I would forever lose control of my body to some unknown entity.

Unable to define my true self, I needed to quickly come up with something reassuring to tell the professor.

“I’ll be more careful next time.”

I wasn’t confident in my expression.

Since vocabulary is a form of intelligence, and I hadn’t had many conversations, I was unbalanced in this area.

It was ridiculous that I could successfully cast a 5th circle spell for the first time in ages on my first try, yet struggle with telling a lie that no one would believe coming from an eight-year-old.

“You have a kind heart.”

“Pardon?”

“When a baby fell into a well and everyone in the village ignored it, a passing stranger jumped in to save the child. Mencius believed humans are inherently good based on that one person’s actions, not the majority who turned away. Isn’t the world beautiful because people like you exist, Name?”

“Ah…”

“I’m proud of you. But next time something like this happens, please contact me first. I’ll be on your side whenever and wherever.”

“Yes… I’ll keep that in mind…”

Truly, this Cheon Kyu-jin was an unpredictable man.

But thanks to him, my complicated feelings seemed to be sorting themselves out.

“Is there anything you want to eat? You must be hungry by now.”

“What time is it?”

“11 AM. You’ve been lying down for a full 18 hours.”

“I really want that Châteaubriand steak I missed yesterday.”

“Sorry, but drink this potion first. You didn’t finish your daily dose yesterday, did you?”

Professor Cheon chuckled as he pulled out several potion bottles from his bag.

“Ugh. Is that why you asked?”

“You need to take them properly to recover quickly. I can’t bear the thought of you being sick.”

When he puts it that way, I have no choice but to drink them.

I ended up emptying two bottles completely in front of Professor Cheon.

My stomach feels bloated.

“Any discomfort when taking the potions?”

“No, I’m used to it. But I think I’d prefer something solid rather than liquid. You know… drinking this much makes me need to use the bathroom frequently.”

“I’ve already consulted with professors from the Food and Nutrition department. We should have an answer within a few days.”

“That’s good news. I’d prefer small pills.”

“Better not get your hopes up too high, though.”

At school, when girls say they’re going to the bathroom, they all go together in a group, which is so embarrassing.

Compared to when I used to inhale mana potions as gas in the capsule, nothing could be more convenient, but I guess efficiency issues would make it impossible to meet the daily dosage requirement.

“I heard you treated your friend’s mother. I don’t know much about diseases, but I heard it was incurable. Where did you learn such magic?”

“Ah, well… I learned about it from reading papers from the Korean Neuroscience Society. I vaguely heard that treatment has already been commercialized in the US…?”

“Is that so? But wasn’t the 5th circle magic ‘Akashic Record’ that you used a materials engineering magic typically used for molecular printing?”

“What do you mean? The Akashic Record isn’t just some simple 3D printer. If you know the molecular structure properly, you can create identical substances semi-permanently, and since it’s a reversible magic, you can easily create reverse reactions, and it can even function as biological material that only affects specific receptors like animal hormones, so in short, theoretically it’s omnipotent…”

I stopped talking, feeling like I might have rambled too much, and checked his reaction.

“You can continue if you’d like?”

“No, I’m a bit embarrassed.”

“But you look happy when you talk about magic, Name.”

I changed the subject to avoid getting more flustered.

“Have you met Yuna’s family?”

“I didn’t see your friend as she went home, but I met her two brothers.”

“Two? Ah, I guess Yuna’s older brother came too. He wasn’t there when I was.”

“They just kept thanking you. I deliberately didn’t mention the magic you used. You would have done the same, right?”

“Thank you… It’s too much money for Yuna’s family to handle.”

“It seemed that way.”

“It’s not purely out of kindness—Yuna could definitely become an excellent magic scholar, so I consider it a kind of investment… Not that I’m trying to pass the burden to you, Professor! I’ll earn it all back myself—”

“You? How do you plan to earn it?”

“Like before… through streaming…”

“Really?”

“Can I ask how much it cost?”

“Want to guess?”

“About 6 million won…? No, 7? 8? Is it even more?”

“Unfortunately.”

“10 million…?”

“10.81 million won.”

“That’s impossible! Even with Academy benefits, it costs over 10 million won?!”

“I’ll need to check the details when I get home, but it seems the tax reduction was halved due to unauthorized use of a public space.”

“10 million… 10 million…”

Professor Cheon laughed it off good-naturedly.

Sure, it might not be a large sum for the professor, but having made up my mind to pay it back, there was no room for compromise.

“I’ll definitely pay it back. I’ll even add interest.”

So the total principal to repay is 10.93 million won.

Suddenly, Sia’s promise to me flashed through my mind.

[For VTube, I’ll apply for earnings every quarter and send you your share at the end of March.]

Right.

I immediately turned on my phone to check the VTube view count.

There were 5 videos uploaded from our sessions together, with views ranging from 200,000 to 500,000.

But since I couldn’t gauge how much revenue that would generate from views alone, I went to an estimation site and entered the links.

[Period filter: +1,812,618 views / + $2,517 ~ $2,832]

About 5 to 5.5 million won.

Even after taxes and splitting it with Sia, I could take home at least 2 million won.

Still, I needed to earn about 9 million more, which was a daunting prospect.

But I didn’t stream regularly on Twissy, nor did I have the gaming content viewers wanted, so my subscriber count barely reached four digits.

I pondered for a moment.

I could definitely attract viewers by streaming League with the condition of reaching Challenger using my skills, but that wouldn’t differentiate me from other streamers.

Plus, I wasn’t used to reading chat while gaming, and above all, I didn’t want to keep playing League.

‘Should I try World of Arsheria instead?’

It’s definitely more popular than League.

But I couldn’t figure out what kind of entertainment I could provide on a World of Arsheria stream.

It was an attractive option since it provided an environment where I could use magic, but… I’d need to consult Sia or others about this later.

Knock knock

“Come in.”

The door to the hospital room opened, and a man with a familiar yet unfamiliar face entered.

“Oh, it’s that young man from earlier. Did you come to say hello?”

“Yes, nice to see you again.”

“Then I’ll excuse myself so you two can talk.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’ll go buy some abalone porridge. Try to hold out a little longer if you’re hungry.”

Professor Cheon got up from his seat with a grunt, and the young man gave him a slight bow.

Ah, I thought I recognized that face—he looks exactly like Yuna’s brother, Seo No-eul.

But unlike Seo No-eul who stands at 190cm, this man was of average height at about 175cm.

“Hello. I’m Seo Ma-ru, Yuna’s eldest brother.”

This is the firstborn…?

“Hello, nice to meet you.”

“Sorry for showing up so suddenly. I asked your father to let me know when you woke up.”

“Ah… father.”

Professor Cheon is my adoptive father, so he is my father. It feels strange to hear him called that.

“May I sit here?”

“Yes, please make yourself comfortable.”

Seo Ma-ru hadn’t come to the hospital empty-handed.

“I wasn’t sure what kids like these days.”

I carefully unwrap the package he handed me.

“What’s this…?”

What is it?

I can’t tell what it is.

It doesn’t seem like a simple doll.

It’s a 30cm long object shaped like a musical note, with cute eyes and a mouth attached to the head part.

“Actually, your father recommended it, saying you’d definitely like it. This is a musical instrument called an Otamatone.”

“This is an instrument?”

Aren’t instruments supposed to look grand, like pianos, cellos, or bassoons?

I even started to wonder if I was confused about the term “instrument.”

“It really is an instrument. Let me show you how to use it. Hold the head part with one hand and the stick with the other. Then, if you channel a small amount of mana, like this.”

[Aah~ Aaaah~]

“…!!!”

The musical note made a human sound!

Seo Ma-ru smiled with satisfaction and showed me other ways to use it.

“The sound changes depending on the nature of the mana you channel. If you use water-attribute mana, it produces a female soprano voice, and if you use earth-attribute mana, it produces a male baritone voice. Want to try?”

“Yes, I’d love to.”

This was truly one of the most fascinating objects I’d encountered in my entire life.