Ch.480My Order, My Justice

The sudden accusation of “sleeping with the enemy” was eventually dismissed as unfounded, thanks to Ceylon’s desperate explanations that lasted several minutes.

Though the paladins leaving the barracks still had distrust lingering in their eyes.

Well, who would believe an excuse like “I was just trying to confirm she wasn’t harmed by the Light of Judgment”?

They only nodded and left because of Ceylon’s position and dignity, but it was clear that very improper rumors about Ceylon and me would be spreading soon.

After the paladins departed, I tried to cool my slightly flushed face while puffing heavily on the cigarette I’d left in the ashtray.

Ceylon stood there for a long while, looking up at the ceiling, not knowing what to do.

“Phew…”

To be honest, I was a bit nervous.

If Ceylon had mentioned my stigmata to the other paladins, he could have perfectly cleared his name of the false accusations.

If he had done that, I would have inevitably been officially recognized as a candidate for Astraea’s sainthood.

However, Ceylon didn’t say a word about the stigmata, even while bearing his subordinates’ misunderstanding.

Whether he was concerned about the uproar that would follow if this fact became public, or whether he was being considerate to me for showing the stigmata only to him… well, I was somewhat grateful.

“…So, are you convinced it’s not fake? Or should I show you again?”

“N-no! Please stop…!”

When I slightly pulled at the bandages covering my chest to reveal the area with the stigmata, Ceylon was startled, bowed his head, and pleaded with me to stop.

His suddenly formal speech pattern and the cold sweat pouring down his face were quite amusing, so I giggled for a while with the cigarette in my hand.

—-

Ceylon, who had been standing straight and taking deep breaths repeatedly, finally seemed to calm down and carefully opened his mouth.

“Um… Baron Median? If I may ask, could you explain how you came to have that stigmata…?”

His attitude was so polite that he might as well have been a completely different person from before I showed him the stigmata.

That’s how devout a believer he was.

Being the strongest in the Church of Astraea meant that he had offered that much Good Karma to Astraea.

I told him about how I came to have the stigmata.

Though the explanation was simply about why I opposed Wilhelm, and how I discovered it while bathing after being hit by the Light of Judgment.

He asked particularly carefully yet persistently about why I opposed Wilhelm, so I had no choice but to explain that part in more detail.

After revealing the stigmata, I needed to maintain a friendly relationship with this person at the very least.

…And I quite liked his personality too.

If he had been someone like Wilhelm, I would have hesitated much longer before revealing the stigmata.

Anyway, there was nothing particularly special about my explanation.

I just packaged my thoughts appropriately.

“I agree that for peace and security, those with power should take the lead in destroying evil… I think so too. But Wilhelm was harming the peace and security of innocent people in the name of destroying evil.”

That was my reason for rejecting Wilhelm’s ideology.

Producing innocent victims in the name of defeating evil was already putting the cart before the horse.

“Think about it. Did those who lost their lives by his judgment really commit sins deserving of death? At least, I don’t think so.”

I continued speaking while twirling the hilt of Durandal with my right hand.

“Wilhelm probably became so obsessed with his beliefs that he confused the means and the end. That’s why I stood against him. For me, order means allowing the weak and innocent to live peaceful lives, and my justice is protecting them from threats.”

Though I packaged it nicely, it was undoubtedly my true feelings.

After all, smiling faces are much better to look at than corpses and screams, right?

Besides, knowing full well that the world would be ruined if someone didn’t step up, I couldn’t choose another path.

I couldn’t trust that Demian would solve everything like in the original story, especially given all the things I’d done.

Just look at the werebeast invasion—if I hadn’t stepped in, Rurik would have annihilated them.

To be honest, the original story only had two happy endings, while there were about five hundred bad endings.

In other words, Demian’s chance of achieving a happy ending alone was 0.4%.

That might be acceptable for a gacha game, but only a madman would trust a 0.4% probability when my future and the world’s were at stake.

An ambivalent mindset mixing conscience, calculation, and guilt.

But this was precisely the belief I had established for myself.

Was this enough to convince him?

—-

After listening to me in silence for a while, Ceylon hesitantly asked about my Karma of Murder.

A question probing into Hersella’s past and my original sin.

Since I had anticipated this question, answering wasn’t particularly difficult.

I told him a story that was half lies and half truth.

“When I was young… I didn’t even consider it wrong. Attacking westerners and elevating a warrior’s honor. That was all that mattered to a Ka’har warrior.”

A lie.

“But… when I faced the slaves I had created, when I looked directly into their eyes, something changed within me. It just changed. For the first time in my life, I felt that what I had believed was honor… the things I had done were somehow wrong, not right.”

Half truth.

“At first I thought it was just a whim. But that feeling… grew stronger as time passed. Like a black stain spreading on white cloth. Never fading, just endlessly growing.”

Truth.

“I couldn’t bear it. If I had stayed there, I felt like I would lose myself, consumed by that feeling. So I turned my back on my homeland and came west. After that… to ease my guilt, to atone for what I had done, I decided to save people. That’s all.”

This too was the truth.

“…Are you disappointed?”

After finishing my confession-like story, I bit my cigarette, looked up at the ceiling, and waited silently for his response.

With each breath I took in and exhaled, the rising smoke mixed with my breath and dispersed.

—-

“…I see. I understand.”

The silence didn’t last long.

A quiet answer. A tone whose emotion was difficult to discern.

Understanding… does that mean he has no intention of pressing further?

That was fortunate. Honestly, if he had continued to press on that point, I wouldn’t have had much to say.

I felt somewhat relieved and slowly lowered my head to look at Ceylon.

And I was startled.

Ceylon, as if deeply moved by something, was kneeling and offering prayers to Astraea.

“Goddess of the Scales, who protects order and achieves justice. Today, I have finally seen your will…!”

…It seems my story was very convincing.

It was a somewhat… no, quite surprising reaction.

Ceylon’s attitude while praying was so devout that I didn’t tell him about what happened in the cathedral.

If he found out about that, he might burst into tears and start singing hymns.

No matter what, that would be too burdensome. And impossible to handle afterward.

—-

To confess, I had actually planned to blackmail Ceylon with this stigmata.

I was going to threaten that if he didn’t back down, I would return to Lacy and reveal Astraea’s stigmata.

Three saint candidates who don’t exist in the Holy Solar Alliance gathered with one mind. Moreover, one of them is none other than Astraea’s saint candidate—could you handle such a situation?

If I revealed that this stigmata appeared on me at the moment I stood against the Church of Astraea’s actions, I could potentially turn the entire church upside down.

To anyone looking, it would appear that the Church of Astraea had gone against the goddess’s will.

I had planned to blackmail him into listening to my demands that way… but I changed my mind.

After talking directly with Ceylon, he seemed to have a flexible enough personality that such harsh measures wouldn’t be necessary.

In fact, I thought it would be better not to use them.

While the immediate effect would be certain, I couldn’t even guess how the Church of Astraea might react later.

Therefore, my only remaining concern was that without such blackmail, there wasn’t a good way to make this army withdraw.

So… I should discuss that part from now on.

A second method to resolve this situation amicably without announcing to everyone that I’m a saint candidate.

“Are you done praying? Then I’d like to return to the main point.”

“Command me, Baron Median.”

Ceylon responded in a solemn tone, with one knee raised.

After hearing my story, he seems to have genuinely acknowledged me… but his excessively humble attitude was almost burdensome.

“…It’s uncomfortable, so please sit properly first.”

Ceylon shook his head.

“How could I dare show such disrespect before a saint chosen by Astraea?”

“That’s why I’m asking you to go sit down. Or at least stand up.”

I sighed and pointed to the chair opposite me.

It was better than when he was showing hostility, but being treated too respectfully also made me uncomfortable.

He probably wants me to act as a saint candidate… but unfortunately, I had no intention of doing so.

“After all, earlier you were saying I was vulgar according to rumors, and now you’re talking about disrespect…”

“Ugh…! That, that was…! I’m so ashamed. Please punish me for my rudeness…!”

Ceylon groaned like a strangled frog and bowed his head.

…I hadn’t meant to reproach him.

Afterward, I spent quite some time reassuring Ceylon that there was no need for punishment before I could finally get him to stand up.