Ch.45The Timid Outcast High School Girl (2)

# “Ah. This feels really weird.”

The lining is just a plain black dress so it’s fine, but the outer fabric is too scratchy.

When I run my hand over the sleeve, I can tell right away.

It’s a normal dress with an apron sewn onto it, modified for cosplay.

“Hey. Is this good enough now?”

Of all places, we’re in front of the full-length mirror by the entrance.

Just seeing my reflection makes my face burn hot.

Even though it’s just me and Yoon Daju in the room, I already feel like I’ve been stripped naked and thrown onto the street.

“I asked if it’s good enough. Can I take it off now?”

“Of course not.”

“Ah, why!”

Yoon Daju waves her hands impatiently.

“You’re still wearing pants underneath. Don’t you know you have to take those off too before it counts as fully dressed?”

“But this… the skirt is way too short…”

“Then hold still. I’ll help you.”

I swatted away Daju’s approaching hands.

“Forget it. I’ll take them off myself.”

I pulled down my gym pants and took them off.

This somehow reminds me of my school days. Back then, I used to think how convenient it must be for girls to change into gym clothes under their skirts. I was even jealous of the popular guys who borrowed girls’ skirts to change.

But I never thought it would happen to me like this.

This is my first time wearing a skirt. The cool air on my bare legs feels strange.

I keep doubting whether this even counts as “wearing clothes.”

How do women walk around outside like this?

Whether I’m embarrassed or not, Yoon Daju is absolutely thrilled.

“Oppa, we’re almost done. Just put this on last and we’re finished.”

Finally, I put on this maid headband to complete the look.

Yoon Daju even told me it’s called a “kachusha.”

My impression: something dangling at the edge of my vision is distracting.

“…Is it done now?”

“Perfect.”

“How long do I have to wear this?”

“Hmm. How about staying like this forever? Honestly, it suits you really well. You could get hired at a maid café right away!”

“I swear I might actually kill you, Daju.”

Whether I’m grinding my teeth or not, Daju just laughs at me. That makes it even more humiliating.

“Hold still for a second. I’m taking a picture. Ready? One, two, three!”

*Click*

“Just smile once and we’re done, oppa.”

“No.”

Even though I’ve been blackmailed into this situation, I won’t let her control my emotions too.

“Oh please!”

“Stop tickling me.”

“The smile is what completes it. I won’t compromise.”

Yoon Daju stubbornly turns her head away.

“Sigh…”

“You might be taking this too lightly, but there could be a second Yoon Daju out there.”

“So you know you’re crossing the line?”

“That’s why you should smile.”

Daju moves right up to my face, her eyes filled with excitement and madness.

“Smile.”

“…You crazy girl.”

I gave her a cold smile mixing disbelief and mockery, but Daju seems somewhat satisfied with that.

“Ah. You’re so cute I could die.”

“Are we done? I’m changing back now.”

Just as I was about to change clothes again.

*Thump*

Yoon Daju pushes down on my shoulders.

It doesn’t hurt, but pressing from above makes it hard to resist.

“Hey! Stop it!”

I shook off Daju’s arms with all my strength.

She lost her balance for a moment and fell to the floor with a thud!

She just lifts her head while still on the ground,

*Grin*

Smiling like she owns the world.

Creepy.

“That’s it. From now on, call me unni.”

I turned my back on Daju who was eyeing me up and down, and changed clothes as quickly as possible.

“Hah…”

The moment of clarity hits me.

All of this was my desperate attempt to maintain my identity as a man.

Lately, I feel like I’m being treated completely as a woman.

First, there’s the speech pattern issue.

Everyone is older than me so I should use formal speech, but that becomes a problem. More precisely, it becomes a problem when combined with my current appearance.

While everyone sees me as a cute little sister, I’m also saying things like “Nuna, please do this…” It makes me look completely feminine.

But I can’t just switch to informal speech now. And I absolutely can’t bring myself to use the super formal “-hamnida” style. Maybe if I’d been in the military, but I did civil service instead because of my bad back.

Then there’s Yoon Daju.

Her very existence is a problem. I don’t even want to think about it. It’s nice that I can speak roughly to her, but the more I do, the more I get pulled in. I just want to avoid talking to her altogether.

The only time I can act like a man is when I’m with Jung Haewon.

I can guide him and teach him things.

I can directly point out when he’s doing something strange.

It’s not particularly admirable behavior. I know that criticizing others is wrong regardless of intensity. I know all that. But it’s the only way I can feel masculine… I can’t help it.

Yes! It might seem contradictory!

To appear manly, I’ve changed all my terms of address to “unni.” Not only that, I even wore a maid outfit and had my picture taken in front of Yoon Daju.

But what matters is what’s in my heart, right? Not how I appear on the outside.

“Hmm.”

That must be it.

My head feels clearer after coming to this neat definition. My complicated thoughts seem somewhat organized.

As I’m nodding to myself, a phone screen suddenly appears in front of me.

“Unni. Want to see the photo?”

On the screen Daju is holding out, there’s a woman in a maid outfit.

It’s definitely me.

But something’s strange.

When the picture was taken, I was determined not to smile. I thought I was giving a sneer, not a genuine smile.

But still, this is how it turned out.

Impossible.

“I’m going to set this as my background,” Daju says with a giggle as I walk back to the mirror.

I try various expressions.

A condemning look.

A glaring expression.

I even scrunch up my face completely.

My anger clearly shows on my face.

The problem is that the fundamental impression just won’t go away.

A timid, nerdy high school girl.

No matter what I do, I only look cute.

This is driving me crazy.

I shoved Yoon Daju’s back as she stood there grinning like a pervert.

“Get out now.”

Crazy girl. I pushed with all my might but she didn’t budge.

“I said get out!!!”

After banishing Yoon Daju, I flopped face-down on the bed.

My mental state is completely shattered, and I can’t even think about doing anything.

I need a long rest. Probably.

***

*Click.*

I carefully opened the front door and stepped into the hallway.

The empty corridor. Outside the railing, the sunset was already coloring the sky.

I walked toward the elevator.

*Swoosh*

I opened the door and pressed the button.

[4A11]

According to information verified by cross-referencing the smartphone AI and survivors’ data, this is a floor that looks like a library.

With a creaking sound, the elevator begins to move.

I looked up at the mirror.

A girl with unfocused eyes stares back.

I still can’t believe this is me.

Meanwhile, the elevator arrived at its destination with a clunking noise.

*Thud!*

The surroundings resemble a medieval church.

Sunlight pours through stained glass windows high up along the long corridor, and the ceiling is so high it’s barely visible.

Just as I was about to step into the corridor, I stopped in my tracks.

“Huh?”

At the opposite end of the corridor, Choi Serim was waiting for me.

“Hi, Dabin~”

Choi Serim leans against the wall and waves her hand slightly in greeting.

What’s going on?

“Why are you here, nuna?”

“Didn’t I tell you to call me unni?”

“That’s not important right now.”

Choi Serim just smiles at me silently.

I walked quickly down the corridor toward her.

“I’m asking how you’re here, unni?”

“…Follow me.”

Choi Serim went down the spiral staircase right in front of us.

“Here. This is the library.”

At the bottom of the stairs were endless bookshelves.

The image of an antique library straight out of books.

Choi Serim stands in place, spinning around with her arms spread wide.

“Right. This is your first time here, isn’t it, Dabin? What kind of book would you like to see?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“People who don’t know can’t come here.”

Choi Serim stated firmly as she pulled a thin book from the shelf.

“Aren’t you here because you’re looking for information?”

The title of the book catches my eye.

[How to Escape This Apartment]

As soon as I realized what it meant, I involuntarily gasped.

“What? Is, is this real?”

“Yes. If you follow what’s written in this book, you can escape from here. Me. You. Everyone else.”

“Then show me quickly! Why haven’t you told anyone about this until now?”

The thin book came into my hands.

Choi Serim brushes her hair back with a strange expression.

“Check it out.”

“…Okay.”

So if I just follow these instructions, I can get out of this wretched place?

With trembling hands, I turned the first page.

On the blank white page, just one sentence was written.

[This is not an apartment.]

“What? It says this isn’t an apartment. Do you know what this means, unni?”

Instead of answering, Choi Serim puts her finger to my lips.

Shh.

“Keep reading.”

I looked at another page.

[This place exists separate from the worldline.]

I feel a cold gaze.

Choi Serim looks down at me and whispers softly.

“Continue.”

I turned to the next page.

[Therefore, it is impossible to leave this place. Even if you leave, the act itself becomes meaningless.]

[However, one method exists.

Eliminate the cause that made it impossible to leave this place.

In other words, prevent the disaster that caused this space to separate from the world.

This also means that you must confront at least two gods simultaneously.]

“Huh?”

I hurriedly took my hands off the book.

The next page was completely black.

Ink was dripping from the book, and my fingertips that had been turning the pages were stained black.

“Wh-what?”

Thoroughly blackened paper.

The strange thing was that I could tell there were definitely black letters written on it.

*Knock knock knock!*

“Unni! Time for dinner!”

*Knock knock knock knock!*

I jumped up in surprise.

My thoughts are hazy, as if my mind is foggy.

Around me is the familiar Room 704.

I’m lying on the bed.

Right.

It was a dream.

As if to prove it, the bed is damp with cold sweat.

The voice from outside the door is familiar too.

It’s Yoon Daju.

But what she’s saying is a bit strange.

“Wait. No way. Dabin unni!!! Did you die from embarrassment? Oh no! What should I do? Ah… ugh… I’m coming in!”

What is she thinking?