Ch.43Shining Knight (1)

No matter how much Asena tried to deny it in her mind, no matter what words Caden attached to the action, the fact remained unchanged: flowers were a gift that men gave to women they were interested in.

The atmosphere was completely different in the way he presented the gift.

In that sense, the shock Asena had to endure this time was immense. It felt as if a line had been drawn between Caden and herself, and their emotions were completely opposite.

Even if she could understand the first time he gave flowers… since it was originally meant for them…

This time was different. This time, without a doubt, the flowers were prepared for Daisy.

And this was the second time.

Regardless of his intention, the repeated act of giving flowers carried a certain symbolism.

“……”

While Daisy was speechless with emotion, Caden spoke.

“…You seemed so guilty to the point of discomfort. It’s just flowers. I’m giving them to you again so you won’t feel sorry toward me.”

He added those words, but Asena’s heart wasn’t eased at all. He might try to lighten the burden of his actions with casual words, but the fundamental meaning remained unshaken.

Asena had to feel intense jealousy watching the shy Daisy. Her chest felt tight and hot, like a fire burning inside. She had no idea how to relieve this suffocating emotion she was experiencing for the first time.

And the feeling only intensified the more she thought about it. The more she considered the meaning, the harder it became to breathe.

It seemed unlikely that Caden was truly unaware of the meaning behind his actions. Because… he had never given flowers to Asena.

He had never taken the initiative to give flowers—the kind given to someone of romantic interest—to her, his sister.

In the past, occasionally, he had picked flowers from meadows and tucked them in her hair… but she had never received anything that felt like a gift like this.

Asena had to feel once again what she meant to Caden. The difference was painfully clear. She had known it all along, but seeing it like this was too painful.

No matter how much Caden loved her, and no matter how great that love was, what Asena wanted was the kind of affection he was showing Daisy.

All the love she had received from him until now suddenly seemed worthless. His love had been so precious to her that she had held onto every memory tightly…

But it had no real meaning. If he wouldn’t give her the kind of love he showed Daisy, it was a love that would eventually become just a memory.

That’s what family love was like. It had to end someday.

The only love that would never end until death was romantic love between a man and a woman.

The love he had given her was fundamentally different in nature. And Asena found this extremely difficult to accept.

Why? Why could that woman create a naturally tender atmosphere with Caden just because she wasn’t a Praester, while Asena couldn’t no matter what she did?

Caden had approached her like a ray of light when she was struggling as a child, becoming everything to her, but now it had to end again?

All her efforts until now had been to earn his praise, to gain solid strength to protect him, but now he was flowing away like a free wind?

The thought that his affection and attention would leave her and turn toward another woman made her sick to her stomach.

If she had Caden, she needed nothing else.

…Conversely, if she didn’t have him, nothing in this world could satisfy her.

Actually, she had anticipated all this, which is why she had talked about banishing him as a precaution.

But as a result, she was only growing more distant from him.

Asena stood up from her seat.

Only now did she realize her legs were trembling, but she stood up anyway.

“….Brother. Can I see you for a moment?”

In the end, Asena was the first to speak to him. It was the moment the battle of wills ended. Asena had surrendered.

Just seeing him create a happy atmosphere with Daisy was making her chest feel so tight.

Added to that was the fact that he was fighting with her, making it hard to breathe.

She needed a break.

Sensing the mood, Judy didn’t follow.

As she waited for Caden, taking deep breaths, he soon came outside.

The moment Asena saw him, her throat began to tighten. But she held her breath and pushed back her tears. She couldn’t cry now.

“……What is it?”

He asked stiffly. Asena’s expression began to crumble. She simply couldn’t maintain a composed face.

“….I was wrong…so please stop now.”

“………”

“Please stop now…please.”

Though it had only been two days, Asena had to plead with him. It was so difficult without his love. Even this felt to Asena like she had endured a lot.

“….Is that why you called me?”

But Caden didn’t give in. He remained unmoved by her plea.

“…..Ah..”

Unable to believe this, Asena had to look up at Caden. Seeing his hardened face, tears welled up.

It was painful to receive such an expression from the only person to whom she had given a part of her heart.

Only now did she begin to realize how angry he was.

She hadn’t known because she had avoided talking to him. She hadn’t realized he was this angry. He had always come back when she pleaded like this, but this time he didn’t forgive her.

Asena suppressed her tears once more and said quietly.

“…..Brother..you said you don’t like Daisy.”

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“…..Brother..you said you don’t like Daisy.”

I didn’t know how to react to Asena’s words.

When she called me, I thought, here it comes. Then hearing her apologize and ask me to stop, I knew my thoughts were correct.

Though her tearful expression made me feel sorry for her, I had decided not to be taken advantage of again today.

So I maintained my stern expression and asked if that was all she had to say.

To my question, her answer was asking whether I had said I didn’t like Daisy.

I was momentarily confused by the lack of context.

And then a question slowly formed in my mind.

Why does Asena dislike Daisy so much? Setting aside the fact that she spoke ill of me behind my back, now I see she hates Daisy too.

Recently, during the incident with Daisy and the wasps, I thought she was embarrassed by my intervention, but now I’m starting to think it might be more than that.

She disliked Daisy, so she told me not to protect her. And now she’s asking with this betrayed expression whether I didn’t say I didn’t like Daisy.

“….Brother…I told you…you can’t be with Daisy…!”

She seemed so frustrated that I thought it might be for political reasons, but my instinct said otherwise.

Actually, since they haven’t told me how their relationship was formed… I’m politically blind, so to speak.

And I don’t know. There might really be some clear reason why we shouldn’t be friendly with the Hexter family.

But Asena never explained that to me. So until I understood, I didn’t want to distance myself from Daisy.

With this basic premise, I began to think Asena was rejecting Daisy for reasons beyond politics.

If there had been a reason, she would have explained it to me. But because it’s a reason she can’t explain, she’s just telling me to stay away without any basis.

I didn’t want to accept that.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I didn’t give her flowers for that reason.”

“Brother, do you really think that explanation will work? Aren’t you thinking about what giving flowers symbolizes?”

I let out a long sigh. After staring at her intently, I asked bluntly.

“…..Even if I did have such feelings, what exactly would be the problem?”

“………..Huh…?”

“What’s wrong with me becoming friends with Daisy?”

“….Brother…what are you saying?”

“Wouldn’t it actually benefit the family? Instead of blessing it, why do you hate it so much?”

“…Blessing? How can I bless it?”

“Why not?”

“………….”

“I don’t understand why the Duchess Praester is acting this way.”

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“I don’t understand why the Duchess Praester is acting this way.”

Asena couldn’t utter a word.

She couldn’t make him understand while hiding one critically important fact.

Actually, with just one sentence, she could justify everything she was doing.

I love you.

With that one sentence, she could make him understand.

I see you not as family, but as a man, brother.

If she could just say it, she could make him understand.

“……”

But she couldn’t say it. She might be able to make him understand, but she wasn’t prepared for everything that would follow.

She was afraid of his reaction. She had never shown any hint of such feelings before.

She had always loved him from the safe position of family. That was enough to receive sufficient love. So this moment of having to break that framework was too difficult.

What would he say?

She couldn’t imagine a positive response.

To someone who had smiled at whatever they did as if it were cute antics, to someone who firmly believed they were family, if she told him she had feelings she shouldn’t have… would anyone not feel repulsed?

If she told him that after kissing his cheeks and forehead, she now wanted to kiss his lips and intertwine their tongues, would he understand these feelings?

If she told him that instead of taking casual naps together and sharing daily life, she wanted to spend passionate nights in the bedroom and have his children, would anyone say they understood?

Perhaps for the sake of the family, he might become even more distant. After talking with Grandmother Riana, he might leave far away.

Now, when she hadn’t made any preparations, when she hadn’t revealed her persistent and dark desires bit by bit. She couldn’t bring up that sudden conversation.

Even though it was her first time, Asena knew that confession wasn’t about clashing hearts. Confession was about confirming each other’s feelings.

When you feel that your mutual love has connected, you express those feelings verbally and exchange emotions.

So Asena knew without saying that even if she spoke out of emotion now, the result wouldn’t be good.

So her lips were sealed.

“…….”

She couldn’t say anything to make him understand. Like a fool, she could only close her mouth after being refuted.

Caden let out a long sigh.

“Honestly, I’m finding small joys in the relationships I’ve formed recently.”

“…….Ugh..”

Asena clutched her academy uniform as her heart ached.

“….But when you keep interfering like this…..it’s quite difficult.”

“……….”

“…..For the time being, I’d like you not to interfere with what I do.”

Caden drew another line.

Those dagger-like words pierced Asena’s heart deeply.

“…I’ll go back in, Duchess Praester.”

Caden gave a brief bow and entered the student council room.

Asena felt as if she had grown cold again.

She blankly stared at the place he had left. She felt like a fool for not being able to do anything, she felt like a villain for wanting him to stay away from others without giving a reason as he said, and she felt miserable for being abandoned by him.

Tears rolled down her cheeks without her realizing it.

Today too, she failed to reconcile with him.

And instead, they grew one step further apart.