Ch.4141. We Probably Didn’t Even Hold Hands

Morning.

As I opened my unusually light eyelids today, I found myself lying on a bed.

…But since when was my bed wine-colored? While feeling puzzled by this unnatural change, I naturally pulled my hand toward me to rub my eyes, but then stopped.

“…Huh?”

Something was gripped in my right hand as I woke up.

It didn’t take long to realize that it was someone’s hand, and that hand belonged to a man I knew.

“…”

Han Siwoo.

He was sleeping soundly next to me, breathing evenly, completely oblivious to the world.

…And he was holding my hand.

As I suddenly became aware of this, my face flushed hot. W-when did we start holding hands? Since I can’t remember, it must have happened while we were asleep.

“…Why is he gripping so tightly?”

He was holding my hand firmly, as if clutching something precious, and wouldn’t let go. Even when I tried to gently remove my fingers and pull away, I couldn’t free myself because I lacked the strength.

“Geez… this guy, really.”

After a brief struggle and some straining, I gave up trying to free my captured hand.

And instead—though it’s a bit much to put it that way—I carefully observed his peacefully sleeping face.

“……”

Fair skin, ash-gray hair, dark eyebrows, a defined nose bridge…. There was no need for flowery descriptions; he simply looked manly.

Yeah… he is good-looking.

But what good does that do?

“Why is he so clueless?”

Despite looking like someone who should understand women’s hearts, he’s actually terribly lacking in perceptiveness.

No, it’s not that he lacks perceptiveness… he’s just completely oblivious to the point where I wonder if this is even acceptable!

Ah, are all men this dense? The question suddenly popped into my mind, but how could I compare when I’ve never dated other men?

Honestly, by now he should have noticed something. But since I’ve never been in a relationship before, I couldn’t be certain about these things.

“…Sigh.”

Suddenly feeling stifled, I let out a sigh.

Seeing him sleep with such an innocent face makes me feel resentful, reproachful… all sorts of complicated emotions.

“Is he pretending not to know, or does he really not know?”

Based on our experiences together so far, it’s definitely closer to the latter.

That’s what worries me more. Perceptiveness isn’t something you can develop through learning.

“…What am I going to do with this idiot?”

If only he would figure things out on his own, you know? Would it hurt him to do that…?

…Thinking about it again, it’s really vexing. Dwelling on it made me feel mischievous, so I lightly touched his nose bridge with my free left hand.

“…Mmm.”

A sound resembling a sleep-talking moan escaped from his lips.

…Did he wake up? Feeling a bit guilty, I anxiously held my breath and waited.

But what I feared didn’t happen. He frowned momentarily as if about to wake up, but then his expression relaxed, and he resumed his even breathing.

“Phew.”

That startled me… Having aged ten years from the scare, I stopped my mischief. I didn’t want to disturb him further in case he woke up.

Since he seems to be sleeping so peacefully, I should just leave him be.

With that resolution, I slightly tightened my grip on our joined hands. The rough sensation of calluses transmitted from his fingertips.

For some reason, that rough texture felt nice, so I wiggled my hand a bit more.

But why does he have calluses on his hands?

“Does he work out or something?”

Come to think of it, this guy has quite a toned body. The glimpses I caught of his upper body in the infirmary and at my house prove that fact.

I hadn’t noticed when he was clothed, but… he’s quite impressive when undressed.

Fair skin with lean muscles and defined abs—I learned then that such a combination could exist in one body.

“…”

Looking at him again, his physique is remarkable.

Or should I say his frame is different? Anyway, his torso is quite large, front and back.

“I-I shouldn’t touch, right?”

I shouldn’t do that without permission. Having concluded that the temptation before me was out of reach, I could only swallow hard.

“Haa….”

Really, he’s such a bad person, stirring up my feelings in all sorts of ways.

As I kept sighing in disappointment, he suddenly shifted his body.

The movement caused his shower robe to loosen, revealing a distinct collarbone line.

“…”

I almost reached out as if entranced but managed to stop myself. I nearly lost my self-control for a moment.

“That was dangerous.”

I firmly suppressed my inexplicably pounding heart. Then, deliberately raising my gaze from his collarbone to his face.

My eyes fell on his lips.

As I blankly stared at those lips that looked too soft to belong to a man… suddenly, the conversation we had yesterday floated hazily into my mind.

‘…So what happened? After Han Siwoo sang for you, did you two kiss?’

‘…No, we didn’t.’

‘Huh? Why not? I thought you two had a good mood going?’

‘The mood was good, but… he suddenly ran away.’

‘R-ran away? What do you mean?’

‘…I don’t know. He kissed my forehead, started rambling, then just went back to his room.’

‘No way, that idiot! So? Did you just leave it at that, Nabi?’

‘Huh? Yeah, I was feeling a bit embarrassed too….’

‘…What a pair of fools! Are you two joking right now? I can understand Han Siwoo being like that, but you should have been more assertive, Nabi!’

‘J-Jinhee? Are you angry?’

‘Wouldn’t you be angry if you were me? …No. This won’t do. For both your sakes… I need to step in. Alright, Nabi?’

‘Y-yes?’

‘Go to Han Siwoo’s room now. He said he has a double room to himself, right? So, don’t come back until you’ve stamped it.’

‘S-stamp? What stamp?’

‘Go stamp your lips on his, you fool!’

“……”

If, just if.

If I had been a little braver last night and kissed him.

Could our morning have been different?

I mean, instead of secretly stealing glances like this, more confidently. You know…

“…What am I saying, am I crazy?”

Stop these strange fantasies. How would I deal with the aftermath? I shook my reddened face from side to side several times. It helped clear my mind a bit.

After shaking my head a few more times, I observed him sleeping.

With a faint smile on his lips, he was deeply immersed in sleep, seemingly pleased about something.

Capturing his image in my eyes, I muttered for no particular reason.

“Let’s see how long you can keep running away.”

He might have thought it was just a passing remark, but when I said I’d get back what I was owed with interest, I absolutely meant it.

Though I didn’t show it, I was actually extremely embarrassed too. So I’ll get it back by any means necessary.

But… how?

“S-should I create the right mood first?”

Make it so he can’t resist k-kissing…?

***

The next morning.

When I opened my eyes, Hwa Nabi was nowhere to be seen. She must have woken up earlier and returned to her room.

“…”

When did she leave? The obvious question popped into my mind.

It’s strange because I’m usually a light sleeper and notice any rustling nearby. So normally, I should have woken up when Hwa Nabi did.

“Was I that tired?”

That’s the only explanation that makes sense. I did have trouble sleeping for some reason, but I never thought I’d sleep through someone getting up next to me.

I felt a bit disappointed, but thinking rationally, this was for the best. Coming out of a man’s room together first thing in the morning would only invite unnecessary misunderstandings.

“…Better get washed up.”

…After finishing my morning routine and having a simple breakfast.

The cruise ship, having traveled for about another hour, finally arrived at Jeju Port’s coastal dock. The voyage had taken a full fifteen hours.

“Where are we going now? The accommodation?”

“No, they said we’re going to tourist spots first.”

“Where? Where are we going first?”

Despite having spent half a day on the ship, which should have been tiring, the students looked remarkably energetic. Is it because they’re still young? Seeing them chatting excitedly made me feel warm inside too.

“…”

I’m absolutely not envious of that… Anyway, I shook my head to clear my thoughts.

“Alright, Class A! Gather over here! I’ll check attendance and explain today’s schedule!”

Following the homeroom teacher’s call, Class A lined up in two rows divided by gender. According to the teacher’s explanation, today’s schedule was as follows:

Morning – Touring attractions

Afternoon – Recreation at the accommodation

Lunch would be provided at a designated restaurant along the way, and with that explanation complete, we began boarding the tour bus chartered by the school.

“Teacher, how should we sit?”

“Ah, kids! Just leave the front seats empty and sit with whoever you want!”

“……”

…Sit with whoever we want? How do I do that? Does it mean I can sit alone if no one wants to sit with me?

It would be better to assign seats by student number; I wish they wouldn’t create situations like this. Every time this happens, my meager social connections become painfully obvious, which hurts.

“Siwoo, what are you doing standing there?”

“I, uh, was just organizing my thoughts?”

Why did I answer with a question? I was so flustered that a strange response came out.

Hwa Nabi, who was looking at me like I was some strange creature, eventually pushed me from behind and boarded the bus.

“Stop saying weird things and get on quickly. You’re keeping people waiting.”

And so we boarded the bus, half-forcibly. Hwa Nabi paused briefly to look around the interior, then led me toward an empty seat.

“There’s a seat over there.”

The spot Hwa Nabi pointed to was right in the middle. She pushed me into the window seat and took the aisle seat for herself. Just like that, we ended up sitting next to each other.

“Alright, everyone’s here? Driver, we can depart now.”

Following the homeroom teacher’s signal after checking attendance, the bus started with a jolt.

“Teacher, how long will it take to get there?”

“Probably over an hour. So don’t make unnecessary noise, and if you want to talk, just take a nap instead. Don’t disturb the driver.”

The teacher said that, but kids these days aren’t ordinary. At first, it seemed quiet, but within five minutes of departure, the bus interior was filled with chatter and playful noises.

“Siwoo, are you tired?”

“Huh? No, I’m not tired. Why? Do I look tired?”

“Yes, you have dark circles under your eyes.”

“…Really?”

I was pretending otherwise, but I did have trouble sleeping.

The reason, well… it’s pointless to explain it myself.

With no excuse to offer, I just stared out the window when I heard rustling beside me.

Curious, I looked over to see Hwa Nabi holding wired earphones.

In this era where wireless earphones are the norm, she had wired ones.

Noticing my curious gaze, Hwa Nabi cleared her throat awkwardly.

“…What? Are you interested in me?”

“…”

What kind of question is that?

“…It’s not that, I’m just curious. Don’t most people use wireless earphones these days? AirPods or Buds? Something like that.”

“Hmm, well. Wireless earphones are convenient for storage. But I prioritize sound quality. Since wired earphones also have noise cancellation, there’s no need to buy those expensive ones.”

“Ah… is that so?”

Honestly, I didn’t quite understand what she meant, but I nodded as if I did because it seemed like I should. Hwa Nabi’s brow twitched momentarily.

“Siwoo, your face says you don’t understand?”

She hit the nail on the head. Is my face that transparent?

I touched around my mouth to check, and Hwa Nabi, looking somewhat displeased, handed me one of her earphones.

“Try it on. Then you’ll understand.”

Since it would be awkward to refuse her offer, I inserted the earphone into my left ear as instructed.

The fit itself isn’t bad. It fits my ear perfectly, if that makes sense.

“How is it? Comfortable, right?”

“Yeah, it is comfortable. But I think I’d need to listen to music to judge the sound quality?”

Hwa Nabi put the other earphone in her ear and operated her phone to play a song.

…It’s quite a calm and peaceful piece of music.

The kind of gentle music that might make you fall asleep if you keep listening to it.

Yes, this is closer to sleep music than a song.

“Hwa Nabi, this…”

“Yes, makes you sleepy, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, listening to it is making me really drowsy.”

“Really? Then you should close your eyes and sleep.”

Hwa Nabi said it casually, but it didn’t seem right to fall asleep with someone sitting next to me.

Maybe if we both dozed off it would be different, but that’s not good manners.

“Still, how can I sleep alone?”

“I’m fine. But you didn’t sleep well, right? So just take a short nap, and I’ll wake you when we arrive.”

Her thoughtfulness was very much appreciated, but I wondered if it was really okay. Just as I was about to ask that—

“Shh.”

As if telling me not to speak further, Hwa Nabi put her index finger to her lips and looked at me intently.

Then, suddenly flashing a mischievous smile, she said to me:

“Should I sing you a lullaby too?”

“…That won’t be necessary.”