Ch.401Repentance (1)

Kate came to find me while I was looking after Ariel. Ariel can replenish her energy through photosynthesis, so she doesn’t need to eat.

The reason I stay by her side is simple. Her sleeping face is just too cute and lovely.

From her chubby baby cheeks to the sprout on her head and angel wings—her appearance seems to have every adorable feature imaginable.

As I was quietly watching her, not even thinking about waking her up, Kate entered my room.

“…I’m sorry.”

“Pardon?”

She apologized without any explanation. I was slightly taken aback, and when I looked at her face, I became even more confused.

She was making an expression like she might cry at any moment, clutching the hem of her skirt tightly with both hands.

The lights were off for Ariel’s nap. Only the bedside lamp dimly illuminated Kate.

Her blue glowing eyes were moist, making her look like she might burst into tears at any moment.

“…Did something happen?”

I decided to first figure out what was going on. Since she apologized out of nowhere, I had no idea what circumstances led to this.

When I asked in a slightly subdued voice, Kate flinched and slowly raised her head.

Our eyes met briefly, but she immediately lowered her head with a swift motion.

She looked like someone who had committed an unspeakable sin. I grew increasingly puzzled and shifted my gaze toward Ariel.

“Snore…”

Ariel was sleeping, blissfully unaware of the world. But if we continued talking here, we might wake her up.

There are unused rooms in the dormitory, so we could talk there.

“Follow me for now. It’s not good to talk here.”

“Yes…”

Kate followed me with her head bowed like a true sinner. I moved carefully so as not to wake Ariel and headed to the living room.

In the living room, I could see Adelia and Marie having a pleasant conversation.

Given Adelia’s personality, she tends to listen to everything Marie says, while Marie leads most of the conversation.

“Hmm? Where are you two going?”

Marie noticed us with perfect timing and asked with a smile. Adelia also turned to look at us.

I scratched my head awkwardly and then looked at Kate. She still couldn’t raise her head and had a gloomy expression.

This conversation would probably take some time.

“I need to talk with Kate for a bit. When will the meal be ready?”

“Let me see. Adel?”

“It should be done in 20 minutes at the latest.”

“I’ll be back within 30 minutes to be safe. Is that okay?”

“It’s fine, but…”

Marie trailed off and gave me and Kate an ambiguous look.

Just as I was starting to feel uneasy about her gaze, she spoke.

“Could it be… No, 30 minutes would be far too short.”

“It’s not like that.”

I could guess what she was thinking. Just as she knows me, I can somewhat read her thoughts too.

When I responded in a deflated voice, Marie giggled mischievously. I’ll let it slide because she’s pretty.

“Alright. We’ll prepare things slowly, so go have your talk. And don’t worry about Ariel.”

“Thanks. Kate?”

“Yes…”

And so Kate and I made our way to an empty room. As this is a top-tier dormitory provided by the academy, there are many vacant rooms.

Originally, these would be quarters for maids, servants, and their supervisors.

However, due to Adelia’s meticulous nature, she thoroughly cleans even the unused rooms.

*Creak*

After seating Kate on the soft bed, I pulled up a chair and placed it opposite her.

Even as she sat on the bed, Kate still wouldn’t raise her head and kept her eyes downcast.

After sitting in the chair, I gazed at her silently. She looked so different from her usual self.

Normally, she always has a radiant smile fueled by her fanatical faith in her god, but today she’s inexplicably gloomy.

‘It seems she had some friction with Grandfather…’

That’s the only assumption I can make right now. Clark was, on the surface, a skeleton resurrected through unholy sorcery.

To a zealot like Kate, he would naturally be a target for elimination—a dead man who defied the divine order.

Though she’s grown since the time she abruptly asked for seeds, her fanaticism remains. If anything, it’s gotten worse.

“Kate.”

“…Yes.”

“Can you tell me why you apologized to me?”

But all of this is just speculation. To confirm properly, I need to hear her words.

At my question, Kate flinched again and clenched her fists tightly on her knees.

Seeing her reaction filled with complex emotions, I decided to take a more serious approach.

“…Issac.”

“Yes. Please speak.”

“I… have committed a sin.”

Kate confessed her sin. It was similar to a confession before God—like a sacrament of penance.

So what sin did she commit? I leaned in closer with a more attentive posture.

She began to reveal her sins one by one, still with her head bowed.

Though her voice was tearful, it was heartbreaking to see her trying so hard to continue speaking.

“Following God’s word, I went to the most abominable place in the world—where Clark was. It was to bring back the honored guest as the oracle said.”

“…”

“But I met Clark, and despite indications that he wasn’t an evil being, I attacked him on my own accord.”

Just as I expected. Given Kate’s personality, it would be stranger if she hadn’t fought.

At the same time, I wondered: why did Luminus give Kate such an ambiguous oracle?

Oracles are typically vague and differ from person to person. In my case, I don’t receive any future predictions at all.

The same goes for Kate. After smiting the corrupt Cardinal, she too can communicate directly with Luminus like me.

But seeing the oracle she received, Luminus must have had some intention.

“I didn’t bend my beliefs and harmed Clark, calling him one who defied the natural order. If I had thought more deeply, listened to others, or at least not acted so dogmatically, this wouldn’t have happened.”

“…Do you regret it?”

“Yes. What’s more disgusting is that I…”

Kate bit her lip hard mid-sentence. Her tightly closed lips trembled, as did her fists on her knees.

*Drip*

Unable to overcome the guilt welling up inside her, a tear streamed down her pale cheek.

I was surprised for a moment but didn’t wipe it away, silently watching. This was her time of repentance.

Of course, I’m not a real priest and can’t give absolution, but I can think of this as counseling.

“For a brief moment… I resented Luminus for giving me such an oracle.”

“…”

“It was my fault… I misinterpreted and acted on my own… To try to shift the blame to Him… is so disgusting to me.”

People are truly fickle. They try to shift their mistakes elsewhere and hate taking responsibility.

Kate is experiencing this now, but as we know, her mind is filled with fanaticism.

For a zealot who would even sacrifice her life, blaming her god is absolutely unacceptable.

But that doesn’t erase her mistake. Whether she takes responsibility herself or shifts it to her god, there’s a problem.

All of this happened because of Kate’s “fanaticism.” A person with normal thinking would apologize and be done with it.

‘So that’s why the oracle was given ambiguously.’

It seems Luminus targeted this point. Though he exudes humanity, he truly has godlike insight.

Then my task is clear: to gradually strip away Kate’s fanaticism.

Looking at her now sobbing, I smiled gently and spoke.

“I see. Did Clark say anything to you?”

“*Sob* Yes, yes. He said there’s nothing more irresponsible than judging everything by what you see and hear, and then attributing it to God’s will… He said that’s exactly what heretics do, which I despise.”

“Was that your first meeting?”

“Yes…”

Experience truly can’t be ignored. Even in their first meeting, he accurately pierced through Kate’s essence and contradictions.

I slowly reached out to Kate, who was sobbing without wiping her tears. Then I gently cupped her cheek with one hand.

When I touched her cheek, she flinched greatly and slowly raised her head.

What came into view wasn’t an unsightly sobbing face, but a beauty like a painting. How can she look so pretty even when crying?

“Kate.”

“Yes…”

“Didn’t you feel something was wrong in that process?”

Kate blinked slowly at my question. She still doesn’t seem to have found the root cause.

In such cases, providing an appropriate example is easier and faster. I carefully wiped her tears and began to speak.

“Let me give you an example. One day, a husband stole medicine to treat his sick wife. The medicine was too expensive, and they were too poor to afford it.”

“…”

“And theft is one of the sins determined by God, not humans. In this situation, would you bring divine punishment upon the husband for committing a sin?”

This can be seen as a challenging dilemma that provokes many thoughts. The husband clearly committed a sin, but his reason was to treat his sick wife.

The circumstances were such that the husband had “no choice” but to commit the sin. Yet, if left untreated, his wife would be in danger.

Sadly, some would say sin is sin and punishment must be given, while others might say to let it slide just this once.

What judgment would Kate make? I quietly waited for her answer.

“I…”

Having experienced a similar situation, Kate couldn’t easily provide an answer. She must be quite confused.

She should punish him for committing a sin determined by God, but knowing the circumstances, she can’t help but feel sympathy.

If this were the previous Kate, she would have ignored everything and punished him. That’s what a zealot would do.

“…I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“Yes. Before, I would have put him in jail… but now… I’m not sure.”

But now she gives a completely different answer. Instead of firmly deciding on punishment, she’s wavering on how to judge.

This is a common phenomenon when one’s long-held beliefs are shaken. The inability to respond decisively, going back and forth.

I need to choose my words carefully here. If I misspeak, I could guide her in a completely different direction, making this the most dangerous moment.

So I smiled gently and caressed her cheek. Like a parent soothing a child, or a teacher imparting moral values, I spoke quietly.

“I see. For someone like you, Kate, there’s a good solution. You feel sorry for that family, right?”

“Yes. But he still committed a sin…”

“Then how about you treat the wife or pay for the medicine, and show leniency to the husband? This isn’t determined by Luminus, but by your own judgment. And you have the ability to do so.”

“…”

At my words, Kate blinked and then raised her head to look at me. Her glowing blue eyes widened in surprise.

This is something only Kate can do. With her divine power and position, she could certainly save that family.

It’s not about following God’s will, but thinking and acting on her own. A mindset completely detached from fanaticism.

I watched Kate as she seemed to realize something, then removed my hand from her cheek. Next, I gently took both her hands and spoke softly.

“Not blindly following God’s will, but acting on your own. Understanding the other person’s position, and being willing to change if you’re wrong.”

“…”

“Not shifting responsibility to God, but taking it yourself. God loves us immensely, but He doesn’t cover up our sins. He merely shields our eyes with shadows.”

“Merely shields…”

Responsibility is easy to talk about but truly heavy to bear. The reason some people say they’ll take responsibility and tell others not to worry is because that responsibility is so weighty.

If someone has the determination to firmly bear that heavy responsibility, they will grow, even if they fail.

To completely strip away Kate’s fanaticism, it’s best to first understand the importance of responsibility.

“I hope Kate will reflect on herself through this incident. Of course, for you, Luminus is both a parent and your entire life, so it might be difficult.”

“…”

“But Kate, a bird is safest inside a cage, but it wasn’t born to die in one. Just as a child raised by parents eventually becomes independent, someday you too will have to walk your own path, not the one Luminus has laid out. That’s true growth.”

While listening to my words, Kate didn’t say anything and just stared at me blankly. It was an unfamiliar sight, but her beautiful appearance remained unchanged.

To give her time to think, I slowly released her hands.

“Well… that’s all I have to say. Do you have any questions?”

“…I have a request.”

“What is it?”

“Just once…”

She hesitated a bit and then continued with a somewhat embarrassed demeanor.

“Could you… hug me just once?”

“Hug you?”

“Yes…”

A slightly unexpected request. I had a puzzled expression but granted her wish.

I rose from the chair and slowly opened my arms. Kate also opened her arms and waited quietly for me to embrace her.

“Haah…”

“Ahem.”

When we finally embraced, Kate let out a heated breath. I also awkwardly cleared my throat at the soft sensation felt beneath her nun’s habit.

Since Kate didn’t seem to want to leave the bed, I was in an awkward posture, but we maintained that state for a while.

During that time, she showed reactions like nuzzling her face against my neck or fidgeting, as if she was holding something back.

“…Issac.”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry for everything. Looking back, I acted selfishly in many ways…”

She finally realized it! I inwardly rejoiced at her apology. It seems she’s finally broken free from that terrible fanaticism.

I hugged her more tightly in approval. Stroking her head was an added bonus.

“It’s okay now that you understand. Just continue like this from now on. But remember, you must take responsibility for your mistakes. Understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Good. Then…”

I slowly released the embrace and faced Kate. Her face had turned completely red, perhaps embarrassed by the hug.

It was like the reaction of a pure country girl having physical contact with the opposite sex for the first time. Somehow, she seemed even more innocent than before.

“Shall we go eat?”

“Yes, yes!”

At my words, Kate jumped up and immediately headed for the living room. There was something odd about her posture as she stood, but I didn’t pay much attention.

Just as I was about to leave, I noticed something strange about where she had been sitting.

In that short time, for whatever reason, the spot where Kate had sat was damp. It was more noticeable on the white bedding.

“…It can’t be.”

It must be sweat. Yes, definitely sweat.

I muttered to myself and headed to the living room. And…

“Huh? Where’s Kate?”

“She went back to her dormitory for a bit?”

“Why?”

“Don’t know. She said her stomach hurt? She seemed off when she left.”

“…”

I realized that while her fanaticism may have been resolved, her desires remained intact.