Ch.3939. Distrust, and Hatred (2)

A wave of anxiety suddenly washed over me with Erica’s appearance.

She may have entered with Michelle, but she seemed to be intruding. Michelle couldn’t have told her about me.

It would be a lie to say I wasn’t nervous at all, but I wasn’t completely certain either.

‘Stay calm. There’s no way Erica would recognize me at this point.’

Perhaps she heard some unfavorable rumors about me from another noble?

At least, I don’t think she’d interrupt this conversation because I did something concerning.

Right. There’s no reason she would come all this way to interrogate me about something she knows.

“What’s with approaching a stranger so abruptly? Or have we met somewhere before?”

When I observed reactions in the plaza, I was clearly the only one who noticed something strange.

I believed absolutely no one would answer that question. At least, that’s what I thought until about 10 seconds ago.

“How shameless. Thanks to you, an entire party collapsed and countless people died, yet you’re pretending to have forgotten?”

With Erica’s resolute statement, my heart felt like it had stopped.

Moreover, her eyes, as she stood with arms crossed, were filled with contempt as if looking at someone who deserved to die.

I couldn’t bring myself to respond.

With a frozen expression, I could only painfully swallow down my parched throat.

After I remained silent for a while, Erica issued a chilling warning.

“I won’t say much else. I hope you don’t plan on entering Tembris again. If you do… I absolutely won’t let it slide.”

-This is me being considerate to you, a former comrade.

With those additional words, Erica rose from her seat. As if unsatisfied with what she’d just said, she continued in an icy tone.

“Junon. Whatever end you meet, I don’t believe Goden or Michelle should sacrifice themselves for someone like you.”

It was a clear warning.

With those final words, Erica’s figure disappeared from my sight.

Her tone was so resolute it was almost hostile, unlike her usual self.

I know well that Erica isn’t the type to speak this way to someone she hasn’t even met.

So what’s the answer?

‘You… know too, don’t you?’

It means Erica, like me, must have memories from before the regression.

“Hah!”

I can’t help but let out a hollow laugh.

What kind of person am I? What was I expecting until just now?

That since the future had changed, the other members’ perspectives might change too, like Charlotte’s?

That maintaining this distance would be okay?

“As if that could happen, you stupid idiot.”

What a pointless thought.

As if to make me realize this painfully, Erica came directly to warn me.

“I was definitely being naive. I’m not in a position to think about such things.”

I almost fell into those petty emotions again and might have joined the party, heading straight for death.

At least thanks to Erica, I’ve come to my senses, so that’s fortunate.

And now that I’m alert, I can finally hear the murmuring outside.

“────. ──?”

“──!”

The murmuring grew closer, and then someone entered. Once again, a familiar face appeared.

Behind Michelle’s face, Erica was staring intensely at me.

She then mouthed the words, ‘Push her away properly,’ as a signal.

‘Only Erica knows about the regression situation.’

If Michelle knew, she wouldn’t have invited me to join the party like this.

Right. I’ll withdraw as you wish.

“How… did your talk with Erica go?”

Did it go well? Yes, it went very well.

“I’m not interested in that sort of thing, so I’d prefer not to be approached again.”

“Huh… what?”

“I have nothing more to say, so I’m leaving.”

I walk past the bewildered Michelle.

My eyes meet with Erica’s, who was leaning against the entrance, watching.

Though it’s certainly not a laughable situation, the corners of my mouth involuntarily rose as I let out a hollow laugh.

Wiping away that hollow smile, I approached Erica, who was leaning against one side of the doorway with her arms crossed, and whispered quietly.

“Satisfied now?”

“Seems you know your place. Good. I’ll explain the rest to Michelle.”

My place, huh? Right. There’s no way you’d think well of someone who only held you back.

Erica, I don’t know how you recovered those memories, but I have no intention of joining Tembris either.

‘This is actually for the best.’

Whether Erica explained well to Michelle or not, no one came after me as I walked down the corridor.

***

Last night, Erica couldn’t sleep at all.

What kept her awake were strange, fragmented memories like disconnected film strips.

It had been since the moment those memories flowed in.

And as she had guessed, at the center of those memories was, of course, Junon, who had just put on an impressive act in front of Michelle.

“Satisfied now?”

Junon approached and spoke in a voice too quiet for Michelle to hear.

Though it was a small voice, the curtness in it was clearly conveyed to Erica.

“Seems you know your place. Good. I’ll explain the rest to Michelle.”

As if without any lingering attachment, Junon quickly disappeared down the corridor.

The clearest thing in Erica’s memory was Michelle’s death. Junon was at the center of that incident.

If it had been mere speculation, she wouldn’t have reacted that way.

-‘Don’t drink that!!’

-‘What are you saying?! She’s dehydrated!! We need to give her water!!’

-‘I’ll… I’ll bring something to quench Michelle’s thirst. Just wait until then.’

When Junon, who had rushed out saying those words, returned with various fruits in his arms, Michelle’s eyes had been firmly closed for quite some time.

She remembered Junon belatedly extracting juice from the fruits and feeding it to Michelle, but she couldn’t recall what happened after that.

“Erica, what did you say to make Junon so hostile?”

In the training room after Junon left, a bewildered Michelle asked Erica.

She seemed unusually sharp, unlike her usual self.

Since she had seemed fine until her conversation with Erica, Michelle asserted that Erica’s conversation must have influenced Junon’s change.

With that assertion, Michelle demanded an explanation from Erica.

“I’ll be direct too. I don’t think it’s right for the Tembris party to invite Junon to join.”

“What…? Why?”

“I know his past. He was just a hindrance in a team of promising talents.”

“A hindrance…? Junon?”

“That team actually disappeared, and all the members died. Except for him.”

Michelle couldn’t help but be perplexed.

Wasn’t Junon the one who single-handedly defeated Silvia, who had consistently beaten students from the upper C class and even B class in duels?

Even if one were to dismiss that as luck, could all the other instances be dismissed as luck too?

He prevented potential disasters by sprinkling Mistellis powder.

And proving once again that it wasn’t luck, he successfully stopped Charlotte’s rampage.

‘I’ve dueled with Charlotte too… I had to go all out from the start.’

Even Michelle, who handled firepower for Tembris, would find it difficult to guarantee victory against a rampaging Charlotte.

Junon was the one who subdued Charlotte single-handedly.

The idea that such a person was a hindrance to a team was incomprehensible to Michelle.

“It might be hard to believe, but it’s true. Michelle, I witnessed it with my own eyes.”

“That’s…”

For a long time, Michelle wore a dumbfounded expression, unable to believe it.

The fact that Erica wouldn’t lie made her even more confused.

Looking at Michelle, Erica quietly recalled Junon from her memories and thought to herself:

Junon, if only you weren’t in this party, such a thing wouldn’t happen.

***

With dragging steps, I left the corridor and lay sprawled in the shade of a grassy area where few people came, reflecting once more.

“Of course…”

For a moment, I had entertained the thought that I might be able to maintain a friendly relationship with my former comrades.

However, I had to turn away from such thoughts.

It was a luxury to harbor such hopes, unbefitting of my position.

Right. I was just someone busy trying to save my own life, and carelessly facing them like this was shortening my lifespan.

Naive fool.

I almost repeated the same mistake, intoxicated by the sweetness before me, unaware that my life was being shortened.

Stupid idiot.

After all that happened, I still briefly entertained the thought of approaching them? Am I desperate to die?

I seemed to have forgotten.

That being associated with them was like directly strangling my own heart.

“Right. My goal is to survive, not to build friendships with them.”

They were once friends, but I need to distance myself.

They were once comrades, but since someone remembers that, the arrow of resentment will surely point at me.

I could only trust myself, and I had to uncover and prevent the incidents that would occur in the empire with my own hands.

Everything has come back to square one.

“The weather is disgustingly nice.”

Unlike my terrible mood.

The chilly air has given way to a cool breeze that brushes past my cheeks—spring.

Though quite some time has passed, it seems nothing has changed for me.

My body may have gained some muscle, but the tasks ahead are still overwhelming.

“If only I could properly use magic.”

I sighed, pouring out such complaints to myself.

One minute, two minutes, three minutes.

Not knowing how much time was passing, I wanted to keep turning my back on reality, cursing.

“Damn this world…”

And then.

“A person who hasn’t even lived half their life is blaming the world?”

“Who… whoa?!”

“If you lie in the grass like that, it’s useless. Get up quickly.”

A single blade of grass definitely can’t lift a person.

And yet… I’m floating now.

The grass that had been lush grew and wrapped around my body, forcibly lifting me up.

In front of me stands a woman I’ve never seen before.

‘A professor… perhaps?’

The professor-like woman muttered, “So it’s true, genuinely black hair and black eyes.”

“Looking through the student roster, there seemed to be only one person with black hair and eyes of the same color. Your name is Junon, right?”

My name? What use is that now? That’s not what’s important to me right now.

‘How did she do that in an instant?’

Magic that restricts or constrains movement is commonly used by support mages, but such magic has quite demanding conditions.

Imagine using a rope to restrain someone’s movement.

How would you properly bind them?

First, you’d wrap the rope around the person’s body, then pull it tight to prevent them from breaking free.

Only after properly tying it would it fulfill the definition of “restraint.”

Crowd control magic works on the same principle as restricting someone’s movement with a rope.

A single restriction or constraint doesn’t have much effect. The point is that it requires sufficient time, not just a short moment, to be effective.

Therefore, it takes ample time to cast, and maintaining it requires precise control.

Since that’s difficult, everyone carries staff-type artifacts like staves, wands, or rods that provide the greatest assistance in magic calibration.

Even then, if you want to reduce time, it’s best to use magic circles efficiently.

But this female professor’s hands are empty.

Moreover, the magic seemed to have been cast before any magic circle was visible, and she even appeared relaxed.

I could quickly tell she was no ordinary person.

“You were muttering earlier, and now you have the face of someone who’s lived a full life despite the ink not being dry on your birth certificate. What’s wrong?”

The green-haired female professor seemed to be scolding me as if the world’s problems were my fault, not the world’s.

So, I got irritated.

“What’s it to you?! Just go on your way!”

“Well, look at this kid?”

The professor didn’t let me go for a while after that.

Not until all the conversation was over.

***

Academy students generally enter adulthood in their third year, unless they repeat a year.

At 19, it’s a time when they shed the shell of adolescence and develop the skills needed to enter society.

However, while they may be adults in age, they aren’t necessarily so in their inner selves.

They’ve just entered adulthood but are still closer to children.

‘But this one really has the expression of someone who’s lived a full life.’

Looking at that sharp face, it’s as if he believes the world is threatening him.

Denise, who had inwardly muttered this, was observing the prematurely aged Junon.

“You’re a bit different from what I heard. I was told you had a well-controlled temper.”

“What does it matter to you whether I lose my temper or not?”

Well, it does matter.

Denise had come to teach Junon directly, having heard he was Muniher’s disciple.

However, before explaining that, she needed to calm down his temperament for the conversation to continue.

“Ugh, this kind of thing…! If I just break it…!”

Given his usual training, it was a possibility in terms of physical strength.

But that would only work if the opponent was ordinary.

“It’s useless. What would be the point of a binding magic that could be broken by strength alone? You’d need to use magic at least to break free.”

As if saying, “Now, show me your skills thoroughly,” Denise subtly dropped a hint.

Junon, who had been struggling with his muscles bulging to the point of showing veins in his limbs, flinched momentarily upon hearing those words.

Whether he understood the implication or not, his relaxed muscles instantly contracted.

‘What? He seems to have completely drained his strength.’

Of course, that was too much contraction.

Junon instead hung his head and completely drained the strength from his body.

To put it in perspective, he was dangling like dried seafood hanging on a clothesline.

“I can’t use… such things…”

“Hmm? Oh, sorry, sorry. With my age, I didn’t hear well. Can you say that again?”

“I’m saying I’m a fool who can’t even properly use magic!! Is that clear enough?!”

Junon’s voice, filled with frustration, echoed loudly in the space where only the two of them stood.

Normally, Denise would have complained about the noise, but she simply couldn’t.

‘Indeed, as Muniher said, he’s different.’

There seems to be a story behind why Junon has the face of someone who’s lived a full life. That desperate outcry isn’t something an ordinary student would have.

Some students are arrogant or boastful.

Some come with hidden agendas. Some don’t know their place and charge in.

But most of them back down when shown a display of skill.

However, one can’t do anything about someone with a deep wound in their heart.

On the surface, this child said he couldn’t use magic, but that’s not the real issue. It’s clear at a glance.

Having drained even the remaining strength from his body and slumped down, there’s a shadow of an even deeper abyss under his eyes.

Such a shadow shouldn’t be so visibly settled on the face of a third-year student who has just entered adulthood.

‘It seems the wound in his heart is much larger.’

In her younger days, there were those who discriminated against people and bullied her only friend.

Her childhood friend, who suffered from the world’s persecution, once had such a face.

Yes, exactly that face.

A face that says, “I wish the world would just collapse.”

A face filled with resignation, a mix of the desire for the world to be turned upside down and the desperation for someone to help.

Feeling somehow familiar with that desperation, Denise spoke first.

“It’s magic that made you like this, isn’t it?”

He doesn’t answer. But this silence, even after a hundred reflections, is like the solution to a magic formula.

The cause of the boy’s torment was magic.

His answer that he couldn’t use it, and the outcry filled with anger, must be because of that.

First, there’s a need to drive away those negative emotions.

“There’s actually no human who can’t use magic. You’d get the same answer if you searched the entire Kempryton continent.”

“So that’s why commoners can’t properly use magic? That’s why people switch to non-magical professions?”

That’s what you’d think. That’s what you’ve been taught so far.

But that’s not necessarily the answer.

“Wrong. While that might be true for basic magic, anyone can sprout their unique magic. Those people have simply given up on their unique magic.”

“That’s nonsense…”

Junon clicks his tongue with a drained voice. Looking at him, Denise suddenly smirked and made a proposal.

“Then, why not try once, even if you think you’re being deceived?”

It was time to get to the main point.

“I promise to definitely awaken your unique magic. I swear on the name of Denise Flovel Beryl, the chief doctor of Imperial Magical Source Studies.”

“…!”