Ch.3913. Nothing Has Ended Yet (2)

“Come on, come on, let’s move quickly! We need to get back before sunset! Or what? Should we just leave without eating?”

In the early morning as the sun was just rising.

Amid the surroundings hazed by morning fog, a man in full-body black gleaming armor shook his dark blue short hair with his hand and stamped the soggy ground with his metal boots, leaving imprints like seals.

Bustling busily around the small campsite, he made eye contact with each soldier one by one, greeting them while taking attendance.

Every time they saw him, the soldiers would groan as if exaggerating their suffering, but the man dismissed their childish complaints with a slight smile.

“Hey, Lady Alesia? What exactly are you doing right now?”

“What? Why?”

Near the campsite, just about a dozen steps away.

The man suddenly asked someone who was sitting against a tree, embracing someone.

In response, a woman with a massive build glared with her red eyes and jerked her chin as if to say “what’s it to you?”

Her long red hair swayed gently like a mane with her head movement.

The man asked again.

“Why are you hugging that poor child? Don’t tell me… you couldn’t hold back again?”

“Luke? Are you still half-asleep? What nonsense are you talking about? Our Ruel seemed to be having a nightmare, so as his big sister figure, I was comforting him. Can’t you see I’m fulfilling my role as a cleric?”

“Why not just admit honestly that you’re satisfying your own desires? And you call yourself a saint?”

“Ah, did I choose to be a saint? Everyone around me went crazy insisting on it, so I was pushed into it with no choice. Besides, isn’t it your eyes and your vivid imagination that are seeing something impure here?”

“Ha… when you put it that way, I’m left speechless. That shamelessness of yours, could you spare me just half of it?”

Then, the man turned to the boy struggling in her arms and asked.

“Ruel. How are you? Did you sleep well last night?”

“…Yes. Thanks to your consideration.”

The black-haired boy who had barely crawled out of the woman’s embrace replied calmly while catching his breath.

Seeing his still somewhat sleepy state, the black-eyed man gave a bland smile toward the amber eyes that happened to meet his.

“Did that irreverent saint do anything suspicious? Like touching you here and there, feeling you up. Just maybe…”

“Suspicious acts! You absolutely irreverent scoundrel!”

“I didn’t ask for your opinion, so please be quiet.”

Though they kept grumbling at each other, there wasn’t the slightest hint of genuine hostility between them.

To be honest, they seemed like friends of ten years.

Eventually, as the man left with a warning that wasn’t really a warning,

She too stood up with a swift motion.

“If you’re having a hard time, tell big sister. I’ll hug you anytime.”

“I… appreciate the offer.”

“Why do you keep saying that when I’m being sincere? Have you forgotten the taste of my happiness pouches?”

“Pardon? Happiness pouches?”

When the boy, Cariel, asked with wide eyes.

“These. These right here.”

She crossed her arms under her chest, and her massive bosom formed an obvious mound through her clothes.

“They make men happy, so they’re happiness pouches. Looking at them, touching them. If I just endure a little discomfort in my shoulders, everyone gets a happy ending. What do you think? Makes sense, right?”

“……”

How should he deal with this?

For Cariel, this was a type of person he had never encountered before, and it was truly perplexing.

To begin with, a person who approached so familiarly, so intimately without any conditions, and a woman at that.

“But, as a saint, shouldn’t you refrain from such promiscuous behavior?”

“Who says so?”

“Um…”

“If I did something wrong, heaven would punish me. But it doesn’t, does it? Do you know why?”

“I… don’t know?”

When Cariel responded glumly,

She smiled brightly and said.

“It’s because I’ve accumulated more good deeds than sins.”

“……”

“Otherwise, I would have been struck by lightning in my sleep, right? But the fact that I haven’t been? It means I’m doing just fine. What do you think? Can’t argue with that, can you? That’s reality. If it weren’t true, would I be crazy enough to be doing this? I’d rather find a husband and throw away all this saint business. At my age, there are plenty of women with four or five children already! What am I even doing?”

“……”

“In that sense, what do you think? About living with me? Your face is just exactly my type!”

“Ha…haha.”

“I’m serious, why are you taking it as a joke? Is it because of this atmosphere? Huh?!”

…Whether it was a joke or an explicit flirtation, Cariel was a bit confused.

Also, in the face of her fierce goodwill and powerful positivity, Cariel’s gloominess melted away quite helplessly.

“Anyway, we should eat something before we leave, right? Let’s go.”

Following her lead, they reached the campsite that was just being packed up.

The contents of the large pot were a mishmash of everything thrown together, but it was sufficient to fill their stomachs and warm their insides.

“Eat up! You’re at a growing age, aren’t you? If you eat so little, you won’t be popular with girls! Eating well brings good luck and strength. There was once a prince who almost lost his right of succession despite being the eldest son because he couldn’t eat much, and they said he lacked the qualities to be king. Haven’t you heard that story?”

“……”

He had heard similar words in the institute, spoken in a mocking tone, but hearing it from her made his heart feel warm instead.

Goodwill versus malice.

It was amazing how the same words could feel like sneering mockery from one person, but thoughtful consideration from another.

By the time they finished their meal, the campsite had been packed up.

One of the soldiers had taken it upon himself to feed the horses.

“It’s a cute one. Very affectionate too.”

“Is that so?”

The young soldier spoke as if he had considerable experience.

“It seems more suited to be a riding horse than a warhorse. Seeing how patient it is and how well it listens to people, it must have been well-trained. Its coat is well-maintained too.”

You’re a nobleman, aren’t you?

“……”

Cariel silently nodded.

“Still, it will need to adapt to pulling carriages or carts. It’s fine carrying one person and some luggage, but… even horses struggle with unfamiliar tasks.”

“Usually, people don’t consider that much, do they?”

“Those who don’t care don’t. If they see horses as tools like carts or carriages rather than friends.”

“……”

For some reason, it was a statement that made him think deeply.

“Let’s go! Don’t plan on getting home after sunset! Let’s try to arrive before it sets!”

“Let’s take it easy, young master!”

“The night scenery is quite nice too, you know?”

“And we could do night patrol while we’re at it, wouldn’t that be great?”

“Stop talking nonsense! Let’s move!”

As Luke mounted his horse and put on his helmet, he looked every bit the proper knight.

Perhaps because his horse was also black-haired, they made a rather well-matched pair.

As the baggage cart also started moving, the woman who called herself a saint put on chain mail over her clothes, and over that, a garment with a golden cross emblem on a white background.

With the addition of metal armor protecting her limbs, she was fully armed in every sense.

With a flail and shield on her back, and an arming sword at her waist.

Apart from her unexpectedly fair appearance and enormously swollen chest, she was a proper warrior through and through.

“……”

During the journey, wanting to use his time meaningfully,

Cariel picked up his lute.

Besides practicing, he also aimed to alleviate the boredom of those traveling.

Other than that…

“Did you see my dream?”

-What dream?

Cariel asked about the dream he had earlier.

-Oh, was that you? Something pale was staring at me, and it was annoying, so I threw a word at it.

“…Then what was that thing fighting with you?”

-The thing that’s attached to you.

“…Pardon?”

-It started causing trouble in earnest as soon as we left the institute. I was thinking of telling you about it soon anyway.

“…Could you explain in more detail?”

-Should I do this for you, or not?

The golden girl giggled. Looking just at this, she seemed like nothing more than a playful girl, but…

-Think back to the problems that arose right after you left the institute.

“……”

Cariel plucked the lute strings while pondering deeply on the swaying horse.

First…

Pain similar to seizure symptoms.

Strange things that kept coming to mind.

‘I heard voices too.’

And besides that…

“Earlier, you said something was attached to me?”

-Yes, yes.

“…So this is something different from a curse?”

At the academy, he had learned that curses come in various types, from those that target and affect a single individual, to those that spread from one to many in an infectious manner.

-If that’s the case, why were there no abnormalities while you were inside the institute, but things got so bad once you left? Is that what you’re curious about?

“…I suppose so.”

He hadn’t been sleeping well lately because of this.

Though his mind was relatively at ease after escaping, every time he fell asleep, he would dream of Ruelda holding him back, or Patina, Elhermina, Seras, and others following him.

When he dreamed of Eras waiting for him at his destination, he felt such a fever.

And to top it off, when he dreamed of Alesius leading soldiers to hunt him down and kill him…

No, that one was actually somewhat welcome.

It felt like he was voluntarily providing conditions for justified retaliation, which was truly welcome.

But just before the end, right before stabbing his sword into the guy’s heart,

He momentarily wondered if this was right.

And then he woke up from the dream.

The emotions I felt then were twofold.

One was great regret at not being able to finish the job.

…And the other was self-loathing for being able to happily and cheerfully laugh without feeling any guilt or sense of sin after slaughtering Alesius and all those around him.

But.

Above all else, the most serious issue was, of course, that one.

…Mother.

When she appeared in his dreams, everything would turn white, then black.

It was simply despair itself.

Waking up drenched in sweat was commonplace.

And the one who held him back first and most often in his dreams was,

Naturally, his mother.

-Do you think someone is trying to drive you out?

“…That’s a possibility, but I don’t think that’s it.”

-Then?

“What if, instead of driving me out, they’re trying to call me back?”

-Based on what?

“…I can faintly hear it.”

A voice asking for help.

-So what’s your conclusion?

“…I don’t know yet.”

-Perhaps you’ve come up with some brilliant idea that this curse or whatever is making the world hate you?

“…Is that even possible?”

-Nothing’s impossible, but it would be a ridiculous waste of resources.

In other words, if there’s someone who has a reason to do so, it might be possible.

-How many such miraculous spells or curses do you think exist?

“Don’t you know either?”

-I do know?

“……”

-But it’s meaningless.

So, try changing your perspective.

-For a child who has reasons to be hated, wouldn’t it be much more likely to create reasons to hate than what you just imagined?

“…That’s a difficult concept.”

-Why? Do you want to believe that you’re hated because of some pleasant curse, and that’s why you’ve been treated that way? That even your dark and gloomy emotions are a kind of hypnosis or brainwashing effect? Is that what you want to think?

“……”

-Even delusions have their limits.

The Demon King snorted as if disgusted.

-You’re still desperately trying to find reasons to forgive. Do you feel sorry for them even while bitterly resenting them?

“……”

Even as he was breaking and falling apart,

What kind of mindset prioritizes empathy for others?

Now that he had some breathing room, he started defending others in such an absurd way.

A kid who’s so inadequate at self-justification and self-excuse, why is he so soft on others?

‘It’s not like the kid is completely lacking either.’

It was just yesterday.

This very person sliced through monsters without a moment’s hesitation and took their lives.

Despite being afraid of swords and blades,

He was rather calm about things that everyone should naturally fear.

To say it was because of the brutal training would be insufficient, as his adaptation was faster than expected.

No matter how realistic dreams might be, dreams are still dreams.

The balance and harmony between consciousness and physical reality were a mess for this kid, yet somehow he managed.

-Let me make one thing clear. The kind of curse you were hoping for was rare even in ancient times, and if someone were to use such a thing now, it wouldn’t be a curse but divine punishment.

“Divine punishment?”

-It would be more convincing to say that a god with malice wanted you to be unhappy and twisted your karma thoroughly.

So.

-Wake up. While the catalyst might indeed be the grudge that dwells within you affecting things, that’s not the fundamental reason why they treated you so badly.

In other words, the point is this.

-You were simply in a situation where you deserved to be treated that way. Perhaps without the influence of the grudge, it wouldn’t have been as severe as it is now. But, my conclusion is that it wouldn’t have been much better than it is now either.

Suddenly.

Ping!

The lute string he was plucking broke.

“I… see.”

-Are you already homesick? Wake up, I said. Where did your earlier resolve go? Is it because you’re still young? I envy your rich sensitivity! If I could long for something too, it would have been quite enjoyable.

“……”

In the end.

The malice they showed me was.

Not some transcendental will, nor a magical product of some evil.

Just their own sincere…

No, wait a minute.

“…You’re not lying to me, are you?”

-Want to make a contract? What will you give me in return?

“……”

Cariel began replacing the broken string.

Of course.

While it’s true that the Demon King mixed some lies within the truth,

She hadn’t told a completely false story either.

-As I said before, I’m accessing this world using only a tiny fraction of your sight and hearing. So most of what I know is at the level of conjecture. There could be plenty of errors.

By preemptively covering herself like this, how could anyone argue?

After all, her greatest weapon was “I don’t know either!”

“Haah…”

-Stop thinking about useless things and focus on one thing.

Retrieve Grandeus’s relic, Elbat, and then optimize your consciousness and body.

-If you’re planning to return within 100 days, time will be extremely tight.

“…Or maybe I’ll just strut around for another year.”

When he wrote the letter, he didn’t feel the same as he does now.

However.

Elhermina made him realize.

He wasn’t confident about facing them again.

So. When the time comes to properly face them.

In some way or another, whether it’s his father or mother.

He will need to bring closure.