Ch.356IF Side Story: Seems I’ve Arrived a Bit Early (53)

Should I call it the remaining period of vacation?

Since I had to leave the school I was attending, it was no longer that school’s vacation, but still, we tried in our own way to find “normalcy” again.

We didn’t go out often, staying mostly inside the house.

Strangely enough, we kept moving from small places to gradually larger homes, yet we adapted quickly to the extra space. Now we even had a Japanese-style two-story house.

The house itself seemed to have been used as some kind of safe house from the beginning, as it was fully furnished with various household items.

Kagami gradually adapted to the kitchen while cooking, and the uncle also joined us for meals, mixing in relaxed conversation.

We… didn’t talk about serious matters. That had become something of an unspoken rule.

Since we still couldn’t go far, I hadn’t yet kept my promise to visit the cemetery with the uncle, but well.

While we were adapting to the house itself—

“…By myself?”

There was one thing I found difficult to adjust to.

“Kotone.”

This house is a two-story building.

The first floor had a living room, a master bedroom, and a slightly smaller guest room. The second floor had three empty rooms. Two of them were fairly spacious, though not as large as the master bedroom, and one was about the same size as the guest room downstairs. That guest room even had a balcony.

In a normal household, it would be natural for children to have their own rooms from before elementary school. That’s how it was for Harumi and Yuu, after all.

Kagami placed her hands on both my shoulders.

“I’m sorry.”

“…Mom.”

“If things had been normal, I should have made a room for you long ago.”

“…”

We… had lived in such cramped places.

The house where Kagami took me after we fled was literally a single room. A place where the boundary between kitchen and room barely existed. Though my memories of that time are faint, Kagami always held me close whenever we were home, so even that room felt quite spacious to me.

The next house was also a single room—but slightly larger than where we lived before. It even had a door separating the kitchen from the room.

That was where I spent the most time with Kagami. Though we were just tenants, it was personally the place I felt most attached to.

And there too, Kagami and I were always together.

Even though it was because we only had one room, I didn’t mind at all. Rather, I could be close to my one and only precious family member every day.

The country house was the same.

A single-story house with one living room and two bedrooms. Since the uncle used the other room, naturally I shared a room with Kagami.

Perhaps until then, there was a reasonable explanation. Kagami and I stayed together simply because there wasn’t enough space in the house.

But thinking about it again, I just liked being with Kagami.

“Kotone.”

Kagami spoke softly as if to comfort me, tucking my hair behind my ear.

“I’ll be in the room right next to yours.”

“…”

When I pouted my lips, Kagami smiled for the first time in a while.

And as if finding me simply adorable, she crouched down and hugged me tight.

Usually I’m the one who buries my face in Kagami’s embrace, but this time Kagami buried her face in mine.

I silently hugged Kagami tightly.

Kagami’s shoulders relaxed slightly. Seeing her exhale deeply, it seemed she was finally able to let go of some of her worries.

“…Okay.”

I said.

“Because that’s normal.”

Kagami smiled softly and gently patted my back.

*

The uncle would live in the master bedroom on the first floor, and he decided to use one of the spare rooms upstairs as an office. Though he hadn’t yet decided what work he would do in this neighborhood.

Or maybe it wouldn’t be bad to put a bed in that spare room and have the uncle live on the second floor too. We’d all gather in the living room downstairs during the day anyway.

Right. After all, they’re separate rooms.

I don’t know if I’ll always want to stay close to Kagami.

My personality won’t change, but aren’t people slaves to their hormones? Because of the various hormones produced in my brain throughout puberty, I might get irritated often, and sometimes I might need to be alone to feel at ease.

Kagami, who had studied parenting diligently while raising me, would have thought of this quickly, and took this opportunity to make a room for me.

So, it doesn’t matter.

“There’s a TV, and a video player.”

This was my first personal space in this world, and these were the first devices I’d ever owned.

…

But I didn’t know what to do by myself.

In my previous life, I was practically abused, locked alone in a room for long periods, yet I somehow found ways to pass the time.

I know the theory, and I have the memories. I could watch television alone or read books. This is Japan, after all. Though it’s a bit difficult now, once I start school, I could go to bookstores and buy manga magazines.

I scratched my head and turned on the television with the remote.

It happened to be the time when my favorite program was airing, so I turned it on and climbed onto the bed, staring blankly.

“…”

My time, they say, but…

Somehow, it’s not fun.

I mean, children my age normally spend time in their rooms and also go down to the living room to be with their families.

Hmm.

I turned off the television again. Somehow it wasn’t very interesting.

Even when I listened carefully, there was no sound, as if everyone was in their own rooms. Instead, I could hear children’s voices from outside the window more clearly.

Someday, will I be in this room and come downstairs with an annoyed expression when Kagami calls from below saying dinner is ready?

…

I’m not sure.

*

I had a nightmare for the first time in a very long while.

It was a memory from my previous life. About my family.

After living in this world for so long, I thought their faces had become dim in my memory, but as if asking if I’d forgotten them, they appeared in my memory again.

Unfortunately, not with ordinary faces from the depths of my memory.

Like a car being crushed, pressed from front and back, trapped between the seat and the randomly broken and crumpled dashboard, and between seats—that’s how my family looked.

Blood dripping, and the clock ticking.

It was the clock I had given them as a gift.

*

I woke up with a start, as if I had a cramp in my leg.

My whole body was stiff. From my neck to my toes, I was tense and stretched out, and my leg was actually about to cramp.

“…Haa.”

I forced myself to breathe slowly. At least I still remembered how to do that much.

Forcing myself to exhale calmly, I tried to relax my body as much as possible. Then I turned to my side and curled up.

Even hugging the thin blanket I was covered with, there was no mom beside me to tell me everything was okay.

Raindrops were hitting the window fiercely.

The weather had been a bit cloudy since earlier in the day, and now it was pouring.

Summer is coming to an end soon.

“…”

I tried to relax my body as much as possible and closed my eyes to try to sleep again, but sleep wouldn’t come.

Like when you close your eyes after watching a terrifying movie, the family I had seen in my dream kept appearing before my eyes.

I was still sleepy, and having just forced myself awake, my body had no strength, but I had no choice but to get up unsteadily.

And wriggling out of bed, I picked up my pillow and left the room.

Kagami’s room was directly across from mine.

The hallway in the middle of the night was even more eerie, so I shuddered once and then walked along the railing to stand in front of Kagami’s room.

…

Even though I’m her daughter, would she be angry if I tried to sneak in in the middle of the night?

Come to think of it, Kagami had never been angry with me before.

I carefully opened the door.

Soft breathing could be heard from inside. A familiar sound. Kagami didn’t have particularly intense sleeping habits, so I had never been woken up while sleeping beside her.

Walking carefully on tiptoe, I climbed onto the bed cautiously so as not to wake Kagami.

Not daring to force my way under her arm, I curled up and gently rested my forehead against Kagami’s back.

Just that warmth was enough to calm my heart.

At least, I realized that I hadn’t lost my family in this world.

Overwhelmed by fatigue that still lingered from having just woken up, I drifted off to sleep.

Even sleeping until a bit late in the morning, I didn’t have any nightmares.

*

Kagami woke up to the sensation of movement in her arms.

Looking down, she saw the all-too-familiar black hair.

Kotone had somehow nestled into Kagami’s embrace and was tightly hugging her waist.

“…Mom.”

And even murmuring that in her sleep.

We had clearly agreed to sleep separately starting today.

“…”

Could it be that Kotone had become too dependent on Kagami? That was the first worry that came to Kagami’s mind in the middle of the night.

But—

“…Hehe.”

But, no matter what, Kagami thought she would have a hard time resisting Kotone.

“Kotone.”

Even after going through all that, Kotone was still Kotone. Forever Kagami’s lovable daughter.

“…”

Rationally speaking, it wasn’t good for a daughter this age to want to sleep with her mother.

At least, seeing that this behavior showed she was still needed, Kagami couldn’t completely hide her happiness.

“Kotone.”

Kagami said, gently embracing Kotone.

“Thank you.”

Though she probably couldn’t hear in her deep sleep.

“Really, thank you.”

For becoming my reason to live.

In that gentle warmth, Kagami soon fell back asleep.

They woke up late the next morning.

Long after breakfast time.