Ch.3535. Pure Love

Purple eyes gazed down at me.

“At first, I tried to understand your feelings. But… I think I was worse than I thought. I’m sorry.”

Shiro’s eyes had already lost their reason as she spoke those words.

The pressure weighing down on me grew stronger with each breath she took.

‘I need to refuse.’

If I didn’t want this to go any further, I needed to push Shiro’s body away now.

Otherwise, we would cross into a relationship that couldn’t be undone.

“What do you… think?”

I looked at Shiro’s flushed face.

I breathed in the scent from the hand pressing against my face, and my mind gradually became captivated by the situation.

If I simply nodded here, I wouldn’t have to worry about much else.

The reason I initially pushed Shiro away was singular.

I didn’t want to sacrifice her.

We would climb the Labyrinth. And if, just if, a life-threatening situation were to arise, I should be the only one to die there.

This wasn’t a delusion. It had happened before when we defeated the baby Basilisk.

She poured all the potions she had saved for herself onto my body to save me.

If she had collapsed before reaching the base camp, her life would have been in danger too.

‘….’

The more I pondered alone, the more Shiro’s desperation was conveyed to me.

Her arms trembled. Her breathing became irregular, and her lips quivered, unable to form words.

Once we’ve come this far, there’s no turning back.

The first decision could have been dismissed as a mere incident.

But what we had reached now showed that Shiro’s feelings could not be easily suppressed.

‘I need to push her away.’

Why?

‘For Shiro’s sake.’

Because if we got any closer, she would sacrifice herself for me like before.

So that in a worst-case scenario, only I would sacrifice myself.

But was that truly a choice for Shiro’s benefit?

‘She’ll get hurt.’

The wound that would form in Shiro’s heart if I pushed her away now would likely remain forever, hindering her.

Was it really for anyone’s benefit to inflict a deep wound on Shiro’s heart to prevent her from making her own choices?

‘…I was being selfish.’

Only then did I realize my ugly selfishness.

How great a mistake had I made with this person?

“…Adel.”

As I realized this, her trembling lips called my name.

My body moved on its own in response.

“…!”

“Ms. Shiro.”

Instead of extending my arms to push her away, I embraced her back and slowly pulled her close.

Carefully, as if handling something more precious than anything else.

“…Adel.”

“Ms. Shiro.”

We simply embraced, calling each other’s names.

-Shhh.

Moonlight streaming through the window enveloped us.

We quietly shared our body heat, resting our chins on each other’s shoulders.

Her breath was warm, and the hands embracing my back were infinitely cold.

“I think I like you, Ms. Shiro.”

“…Yes.”

This alone wasn’t enough to fully express my feelings.

“It’s not the kind of liking I mentioned before. I still respect you, empathize with your life, and like you as a person.”

However.

“In addition to that, I seem to have developed different feelings for you.”

Then I exhaled a few breaths.

The pounding of my heart made me forget about other entanglements, and finally made me utter the most important words.

“I love you.”

Shiro’s hands tightened around my back.

Even with just that simple action, her desire to be even closer seemed to be conveyed.

It was warm.

“…I love you too.”

After confirming our feelings, we remained embracing for a long time.

The exchange of human hearts wasn’t solely the responsibility of physical interaction.

We were satisfied with this for now, and anything more could be left to the future.

So, I embraced the precious person before me.

How much time passed in that state? We eventually separated and sat facing each other on the bed.

Shiro’s appearance was truly striking.

Her disheveled silver hair absorbed the moonlight. Those purple eyes, whose depth I couldn’t fathom, were closer than ever before.

Since we both shared a single emotion in this moment, we worried about nothing else.

“…Adel.”

Shiro timidly extended her hand.

The boldness she had shown until just now was completely gone.

“Have you cooled down a bit?”

“…Yes, a little.”

She turned her head slightly to the side, as if embarrassed.

I moved closer to meet her eyes, and at the same time, interlocked our fingers.

“…”

“…”

But now that we were doing this, I felt even more embarrassed.

“Your hands are big.”

Shiro brought our interlocked hands up to her face.

And then-

-Smooch.

“As expected, it doesn’t taste like anything.”

She kissed the back of my hand.

“…!”

I tried to pull my hand away as I realized what was happening, but it was already too late.

Shiro pulled my arm and fell backward.

I was helplessly drawn to her, and ended up in a position where I was on top of her.

“Ms. Shiro. Why suddenly…”

“Shh.”

Shiro placed her index finger on my lips as I was flustered.

Then she opened her mouth slightly,

“Aah-“

Just like before, she tightly embraced my back with both arms and gently bit my neck.

“…Ms. Shiro, may I ask what your intention is?”

“…”

There was no answer to what her intention might be.

Of course, she couldn’t speak while biting my neck.

After waiting for a while with no reaction, Shiro met my eyes again.

“Didn’t it hurt?”

She asked while rubbing the part she had just bitten with her right hand.

“No.”

“…Then again.”

…?

This time she bit a different spot, a bit harder.

“Do you want me to feel pain?”

She nodded slightly while still biting.

“Ms. Shiro, I’m sorry.”

“…What are you sorry for?”

She gently released her bite and spoke.

It was the kind of line that could trigger trauma in many men, but that wasn’t her intention at all.

“Just, for my actions toward you. I thought you might have felt bad because of my mistakes.”

“…No.”

Shiro shook her head and stared at me intently.

“Hmm.”

After pondering for a moment about how to respond, I pressed my forehead against hers.

“…I love you.”

“Say it again.”

“I love you, Ms. Shiro.”

“Again.”

“Sincerely, from the depths of my heart, I love you. Enough to give you my everything.”

“…Liar.”

Shiro closed her eyes, embraced me, and whispered softly in my ear.

“But that’s okay. I love you too.”

We repeated similar exchanges for a long time.

Confirming each other’s feelings over and over, sharing affection, and trying somehow to convey emotions that couldn’t be expressed in words.

By the time dawn deepened, we lay side by side on the bed, holding hands.

-Silence flowed.

“Ms. Shiro.”

“Yes, Adel.”

Amidst this, I spoke softly.

“To be honest, I was afraid of things turning out this way.”

I wanted to ask about something I couldn’t answer on my own.

“I didn’t want you to sacrifice yourself. Because of what might happen in the Labyrinth, or what has already happened… I’m still a little scared.”

Shiro’s sacrifice for me was entirely her own decision.

However, I didn’t want her sacrifice, and that’s why I tried to distance myself from her.

It was just my selfish heart.

“I see.”

Shiro turned over and lay on top of me.

“Do you still not want me to die for you?”

“Yes. I still think that way.”

“I’m just like you. I don’t want you to get hurt because of me.”

“…Is that so?”

“Yes.”

It was my selfish heart after all.

“But… I don’t want you to make different choices because of me.”

She extended her left hand and slowly stroked from my neck downward.

“Don’t be bound by me, do what you want to do. You’re a good person.”

“…I’m not particularly a good person.”

I didn’t know myself.

I couldn’t properly explain what I wanted, or why I did what I did.

That’s why I was always busy rationalizing with other reasons.

“No, you are a good person.”

Perhaps because of this, Shiro’s confident assertion felt awkward to me.

“Thank you for saying so, at least.”

“…”

“Ah.”

Shiro bit my neck again.

“I’m sorry.”

“…”

After maintaining that state for a while, we both eventually fell asleep from exhaustion.

***

A warm morning greeted by sunlight.

When I opened my eyes, Shiro was sound asleep on top of me-

“-You’re awake.”

“Ah, Ms. Shiro. Were you already awake?”

“Yes.”

She must have been lying still with her eyes closed.

“…”

“…”

But thinking that Shiro had been waiting on top of me all this time, I froze, unable to move my body carelessly.

Shiro seemed to feel similarly, as she maintained her position while slightly avoiding my gaze.

She must have felt embarrassed now that we were awake.

“…Ah, come to think of it, we need to attend Lady Ainer’s coming-of-age party next week.”

I brought up a conversation topic.

She already knew about the coming-of-age party in general.

And there was something I definitely needed to tell her.

“Yes. What exactly is happening?”

“Well… things have gotten a bit complicated. It’s hard for me to believe too, but since Ms. Reneva vouched for it, it’s probably true.”

I hesitated to say it, but there was no benefit in hiding it.

“It seems that Lady Ainer is considering me as a marriage partner.”

“…?”

Shiro tilted her head, then asked again.

“Lady Ainer?”

“Yes. It seems Lady Ainer is considering me as a marriage partner.”

“…What?”

At that moment, a murderous aura seemed to emanate from Shiro’s eyes.