Ch.31Chapter 31. Spilling the Tea on the Hero Who Didn’t Die (1)

The clatter of hooves echoed through the forest as the caravan of carriages leisurely made its way along the path.

The journey proceeded so quietly that, despite the initial excitement, a sense of boredom gradually began to creep in.

“Mr. Hyoseong, if you don’t mind, could you continue the story from yesterday?”

Yes, engaging in casual conversation with companions was the natural course in such situations.

“What story from yesterday?”

“I collect stories for a living. Especially that story about the Hero you told yesterday—it’s not something one hears often, so it piqued my interest… I thought it would be good to hear more while I have the chance.”

The story about the Hero from yesterday.

Though it certainly wasn’t pleasant, she had listened attentively without missing a word.

For someone who made a living collecting stories, one shouldn’t discriminate between types of tales.

“Oh, I don’t mind telling you… but it probably won’t be entertaining enough to dispel your boredom. As Merilyn saw yesterday, Heroes aren’t always as righteous as their title suggests.”

“That certainly seems true… but you seem to have met various Heroes. Was there really no one you got along with?”

“Hmm, a Hero I got along with.”

I rested my chin on my hand, recalling the Heroes I had met so far.

A female knight who picked unnecessary fights only to get her skull cracked by a Demon Lord’s executive; a mage who, despite being in a rear position, charged to the front and got all limbs severed by tentacles; a sniper who hated men yet fell under a vampire’s charm and ended up dismembered…

Thinking about it again, they were all self-destructive individuals who deserved little sympathy, but not every Hero I met was such trash.

“I think there were about three. People I got along with reasonably well.”

Just three out of dozens I met over two years.

Most would consider that a very low success rate, but Heroes are typically gaslighted by the power groups sponsoring them from the moment they’re summoned.

In a system designed to transform them into arrogant garbage, meeting three Heroes who remained decent human beings could be considered quite fortunate.

“Hehe, I’m curious about the Heroes who survived an encounter with someone known as the ‘Hero Killer.'”

“…Merilyn, I told you yesterday that’s a misunderstanding.”

She should have realized from yesterday’s training ground that I don’t have such capabilities.

Brushing off her mischievous joke with mild reproach, I tried to recall the first of the three people I had mentioned.

“Let’s see, the first one I should introduce…”

Though it had been a while since we met, recalling him wasn’t difficult.

Even in this world full of eccentrics, he was considered one of the most peculiar.

“He was someone who always wore a paper bag over his head.”

“…A paper bag?”

“Yes. He covered his entire head with a bag that only had holes for the eyes.”

From a normal perspective, it would seem insane.

No matter how strong Heroes might be, they were still heading into life-threatening situations, and choosing a paper bag instead of a helmet to protect one’s head, a vital area…

Wasn’t that essentially volunteering to meet the same fate as the Heroes who had perished?

“But what was even more noteworthy was his attire.”

“His attire? Did he wear something unusual besides the bag?”

“No, he didn’t wear anything.”

“…What?”

“Well, that is…”

My voice trailed off momentarily.

Even after more than two years, the person I encountered back then still seemed absurd.

“He only wore a paper bag and underwear. The only weapon he carried was a wooden club.”

In a world where even Heroes could perish if careless, he traversed this perilous realm without proper armor or even decent clothing.

Surely there couldn’t be more than one such deranged eccentric?

“…Why did he dress like that?”

“I’m not sure. After hiring me, he never spoke a single word.”

“Not a single… word?”

“Yes. Even at our first meeting, he just tossed me a contract. After that, if he needed something, he would just point or make gestures.”

Having lived on reading subtle cues myself, I had no problem communicating that way. Despite his silence, he occasionally performed hand tricks and other feats, suggesting he wasn’t entirely devoid of humor.

But being such an oddball, there were several particularly memorable behaviors. One was that whenever he went outside at dawn or to see the sun, he would spread his arms diagonally.

He would remain still like that for a while, as if photosynthesizing…

Well, religious people pray too, so perhaps it was just his personal routine.

“There were many other eccentricities, but the most unique was definitely when he engaged in battle.”

“Battle… Ah! Being a Hero, he must have been strong, right?”

“No, he was weak.”

“What? Weak?”

“Literally the weakest Hero I’ve ever met. Probably much weaker than I am now.”

That was only natural.

After all, his armor consisted of just a paper bag and underwear, and his only weapon was a wooden club.

Without relying on any noticeable special abilities, he could rightfully be called the “weakest” among existing adventurers.

“But from rumors I’ve heard since then, despite being so weak, unlike other Heroes, he’s still alive and active as a Hero to this day.”

“If he’s been active, that means he hasn’t just been hiding somewhere safe. How does he manage that?”

“It’s nothing special. He simply dodges every attack aimed at him.”

“What? Dodges?”

“Exactly. His philosophy was that no matter how powerful an attack is, it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t hit you.”

Yes, his combat style was incredibly simple.

When facing an enemy, he would dodge all their attacks.

Whether stepping aside or rolling on the ground, he would avoid getting hit while looking for an opportunity to strike.

It wasn’t as easy as it sounds, but he displayed an incredible ability to dodge at every moment, as if he knew where the enemy’s attacks would land.

And he did this without any magical items or spells to aid his evasion, relying solely on his unarmored, lightweight body.

“After dodging all attacks, he would swing his club to deal damage. If the enemy took even the slightest damage, all party members would declare the Hero’s victory as certain.”

“Why? Did his weapon have some special effect?”

“No, as I said earlier, he just used an ordinary wooden club. But if he could inflict even a little damage with that club, he was confident he could beat the enemy without taking a single hit himself by continuing to strike.”

He would apply holy water when facing the Undead or use fire against vampires, but that was only for enemies that couldn’t be defeated by physical attacks alone.

Despite such an outrageous fighting style, he survived every time, possessing extraordinary skill and courage.

“His evasion skills were so good that when surrounded by Undead archers, he dodged all the arrows aimed at him by dancing.”

“Dodged arrows… by dancing?”

“Yes, like this—interlocking his fingers behind his head and swaying his hips…”

If a dancer had performed it, it might have seemed sensual, but the one dancing was a nearly naked man in just underwear.

Looking back, the visual was questionable in many ways, but at the time, I was too shocked by how he dodged all the arrows to pay attention to that.

Afterward, he methodically found each archer and carefully cracked their skulls, but that goes without saying…

“But the most spectacular thing I witnessed was when he confronted a drake attacking a village.”

“A drake? Isn’t that an extremely ferocious monster?”

“In terms of threat level, it’s comparable to dragons from legends. Its breath alone is powerful enough to wipe out everything in the vicinity. The Hero boldly confronted such a monster.”

“With his bare body, without armor?”

“Yes, and as the Hero stood there defiantly, the drake unleashed its breath at him…”

*Gulp*

Merilyn swallowed.

Seemingly engrossed in my increasingly intense description, she placed both hands on her chest and cautiously asked.

“And then what? Did he somehow block it?”

“No, he didn’t block it—he lay down to dodge it.”

“…Lay down?”

“Yes. While everyone else was panicking and fleeing from the breath attack, the Hero faced it head-on and simply lay down to avoid it.”

Generally, when a giant monster unleashes its breath, guarding is hardly an option, so the only recourse for humans is to find cover.

In fact, even a Hero who regularly fed me pizza with pineapple couldn’t block a wyvern’s breath and died screaming “DODGE THE BREATH! GET TO THE CORNER!!!!!!” at the top of his lungs as his body melted.

But this man seemed to read the breath’s trajectory from the start, moved out of its path, and then simply lay down as if in his own bedroom to avoid the attack…

“And after that, it was just one-sided pummeling. I later learned that a drake’s weak point is its crown, and hitting it there repeatedly can kill it even with a wooden club.”

“W-wow.”

Merilyn blinked in astonishment at this incredible tale.

I’m not sure if she was actually blinking since her eyes were usually closed, but she probably was. Even someone as worldly as her had likely never heard of such an eccentric.

“Is that even realistically possible?”

“Haha, not for ordinary people.”

I understood her sentiment.

Neither humans, demons, the Undead, nor even Beastmen or vampires with their extraordinarily enhanced senses would readily attempt such absurd feats with their one and only life.

But it was an undeniable reality that unfolded before my eyes, and that fact provides clear evidence for what humanity in this world yearns for.

“It’s because Heroes make such impossible things possible that the empire’s leaders are so obsessed with summoning them.”

Magic and faith, monsters and supernatural phenomena…

In this world where such fantastical entities have become reality, the powers awakened by those who cross dimensions act as variables that transcend everything else.

That’s why people in this world place their hope in Heroes, and why the powerful sponsor Heroes to associate their achievements with themselves, gaining the leadership to guide the masses.

And in such a world, Heroes become even more arrogant.

Especially because the majority who don’t receive such privileges continue to be summoned to this world only to become insignificant Foreign Laborers.

“…Well, not everyone can receive such privileges.”

Yes, I too was one of those Foreign Laborers who made Heroes shine.

Someone for whom mere survival was challenging, with significantly reduced prospects for anything beyond that.

Had there not been an adventurer who foresaw my future, I might have been destined to die on this mission—an unremarkable existence.

“Mr. Hyoseong, are you alright?”

“I’m sorry for ending what was meant to be an amusing story like this.”

As I tried to force a smile to hide my reflections on this reality, the carriage came to a halt with a thud.

Soon, the merchant leader at the front called out to the adventurers in the carriages.

“Hey, rookies! We’ve arrived at the village, so get out and help move the cargo!”

“Seriously? Riding in the cargo hold was bad enough, and now we have to help with your business too?”

“Don’t eat if you don’t want to! By the way, you know it takes three full days of walking to reach the garrison without the carriage, right?”

So this was the cleanup for trade conducted on the way to the garrison.

Well, as a rookie, I’d have to endure it. Thinking this, I stood up, but before heading out to work, I glanced back at Merilyn.

She remained standing there, still looking at me with pity.

“It seems we need to work before eating. If you don’t mind, could you sing a work song for us?”

Instead of offering words of comfort, I showed her that simply doing what she could do was comfort enough.

We had already met, and I considered that meeting an opportunity.

So through this opportunity, wasn’t I entitled to enjoy the modest luxury created by her hands?

“…Yes, if my humble talent is needed, by all means.”

As if responding to my expectation, her fingers soon began to pluck the strings of her lute.

*Ting-a-ling~♬*

The clear tone it produced promised to wash away the fatigue of the impending labor.