Ch.297297. Overlaid Truth (4) – Revision Complete

Even though she had tilted her head in confusion when I subtly probed her in the cave, she still managed to pinpoint this location.

It was already surprising enough to discover that the girl in the black hood was Renias.

And the fact that she had recovered all her memories.

Up to this point, it had been a continuous series of overwhelming surprises.

But surprises were just surprises.

I’d seen Renias’s impulsive actions many times before, and while she may have exploited moments of confusion, her purpose was clear.

Right before my eyes. Just one step forward and paradise would unfold.

The only paradise where I could escape the shackles of fate—a destiny of facing an unchanging world no matter what changes I might cause.

That must be Renias’s goal—to somehow block and prevent my body from heading toward that place.

At this point, I wouldn’t be fazed even if something unusual happened.

No matter what words she used to persuade me, I would push Renias aside and enter the eternal dream.

…That’s how it should have been.

Chu.

That warm and soft something touching my lips began to shake my mind.

And then,

“I… I like you so much, oppa. I don’t think I can live without you anymore.”

She says with those lips that just kissed mine.

That she likes me too much. That she can’t live without me.

Not just my mind, but something nestled in my heart began to stir gently.

But I had to deny it.

‘No. This… this is just to change my mind.’

It’s just words spoken out of a desire to prevent me from jumping off here.

Even her saying she would die with me—isn’t that the same? She kissed me just to persuade me. Just to change my mind right now.

Yes. She might have made it up suddenly because she needed to say something.

That must be it. No matter how kind-hearted she is, this is a false emotion.

Against these false emotions, I recited my past that Renias probably already knew.

“If, as you say, I don’t choose death here, will my future change?”

That’s impossible.

“Even if I don’t join the Tembris Party, even if my incompetent self doesn’t exist, Goden still died. Since we couldn’t handle Ashpern, the duchy is being targeted by two named beasts.”

That’s a fact that wouldn’t change even if my position were vacant.

“Then is the duchy’s army normal? With Ashpern and all sorts of beasts flooding into Peltibourgos, Lebrant fell. Do you think anything would change even if Professor Muniher handed over command to me?”

Back to the same place. Back to the same strategy.

Just repeating the past overlaid on the present.

“Even if I were to take that position, no one would trust me. The officers would doubt me as an unreliable commander, and even if I tried to lead the evacuation to Sirach, I would ultimately fail.”

And the end is.

“Even if someone other than Erika appears after repeated failures, it would be the same. The blade piercing my chest is just a predetermined future!!!”

Death.

That’s all there is.

“In this life where death is predetermined, what hope should I hold onto? In this reality that doesn’t change no matter how hard I try to change it, what more should I do?”

It’s just fate.

Whether I’m torn apart by beasts, stabbed by a comrade’s knife, or end my breath here in advance.

Predetermined fate simply cannot be changed.

“No matter how hard you try to persuade me, it’s useless, Renias.”

At that, Renias unwrapped her arms from around me, sobbing.

“If that’s the case… then I’m most at fault.”

“What?”

“Because I’m the reason you were summoned here.”

Wait, what did Renias just say?

…Summoned?

‘No way.’

Could it be that what Renias is trying to say is…

“I’m sorry, oppa. For selfishly summoning you here and making things more painful for you.”

She said that as she pushed me, who was about to fall, toward the safe ground on the opposite side of the cliff.

-Thud.

“…!”

Her silver hair fluttered in the wind as she lost her balance and was about to fall from the edge of the cliff.

***

The whole world flows very slowly, so slow that it’s impossible to grasp what a second is.

But my thoughts are running straight.

When she said she would die with me if I jumped, I thought it was just to persuade me.

I thought she might have suddenly made it up because she needed to say something.

I could understand that much.

But what about those words Renias said to me as her warm and soft lips touched mine and then parted?

No, the act of pressing her lips against mine in the first place?

Did she really think of me that way?

One side of my chest began to ache.

And to add to that.

‘The one who summoned me… was Renias?’

The person I couldn’t figure out no matter how much I searched and asked the Seirens and Rakans was Renias?

As soon as I heard those words, my body moved first.

I look back at myself.

Until just a moment ago, I was trying to end my life.

Then seeing Renias climb onto the rock, I hesitated a bit.

I thought my heart had weakened seeing Renias’s actions aimed at inducing a change of heart. That’s what I believed.

But after hearing those words. I must have hesitated.

At the thought that Renias might die.

…

But why?

The duchy will be trampled by beasts anyway. Not just me, but everyone will be bitten and torn apart.

The death of all humans in this country was just a predetermined future.

And yet.

My heart sinks when I try to imagine Renias dead.

I didn’t want to imagine the death of Renias, no one else.

…Yes. I was anxious.

I hesitated, overwhelmed by anxiety about what if Renias really died.

I don’t want this kind, innocent, gentle junior to try to die because of me.

I don’t want this girl who likes a fool like me to die.

Yes. This feeling is…

“Renias!!”

Her body tilting sharply. Her silver hair fluttering.

Renias, who was about to fall off the cliff,

I hurriedly embrace her with both arms and fall back onto the rock bed where the wobbling rock had stood.

“Ugh!”

My back scraping harshly.

Blood might soon flow from the deep abrasion on my back.

But it didn’t hurt. No, I couldn’t even think about the wound.

The most important thing was whether the woman in my arms was alive. I could understand now.

The relief rising in my chest was proof of that.

‘I… Renias…’

I like her.

Only her. I was treating only Renias, no one else, with a completely different emotion.

“Why… did you save me?”

Even though the future won’t change anyway.

Even though I’ll die anyway.

Renias, who had fallen into my arms, was asking why I had saved her.

“…”

“Answer me. If you’re going to die anyway, why did you save me who will die later?”

I might not have known until a moment ago, but now I can clearly answer that question.

“Because I like you.”

*Squeeze*

“Because I don’t want to see you, who has already swollen so large in my heart, die. Renias.”

As I said that and hugged Renias tightly, I felt something wet near my chest and heard what sounded like a sob.

***

I was always alone.

Throughout my life, or even including both of my lives.

There were many people who offered sympathy while looking at my legs, seeing me in a patient’s gown sitting in a wheelchair.

But I know that’s not real. It’s false sympathy.

Beneath those expressions of pity, there was always another truth unfolding.

It wasn’t any different when I fell here with all limbs intact. All that approached me were contempt and pointing fingers.

Completely unreliable, not fitting for that position, a guy who doesn’t know his place—I’ve heard such mockery countless times.

It’s not that there weren’t people who acknowledged me, like Michelle, Senia, Goden, and some professors… but they treated me as colleagues.

False sympathy. Various criticisms.

If there were emotions I received from others, they were mostly of that kind.

So it was natural to be confused.

But I should have noticed earlier.

Before Renias, who was holding me tight and looking into my eyes saying she couldn’t live without me, threw herself.

Why was she so concerned about my grades, and why did she sob asking why I didn’t stand up against those saying I wasn’t qualified?

Why was she so sensitive about rumors spreading, and why did she spread the truth as if it were her own business?

“I’m sorry, Renias.”

Her sincerity.

It was her sincerity, without a speck of falsehood.

That she couldn’t live without me. That if I were to die, she wanted to die together.

And… that she liked someone as insignificant as me.

That was her sincere feeling.

For me.

“Hic, huuuh…!”

The sniffling sounds disappeared, replaced by heartfelt crying that stabbed my chest.

I was the worst human being.

Making someone I like imagine me falling to my death. And not content with that, trying to die right in front of her.

With a crumbling heart. A sinking feeling. Choked breath and tightening chest. She must have tried to persuade me with a feeling like her heart was being torn apart.

“Huuuaaang…!!”

“I’m sorry. I… I’m really sorry…”

To Renias’s sorrowful crying, all I could offer were words of apology and promises never to do it again.