Ch.272IF Side Story: From the Beginning (40)

“Jieun?”

All the way to school, Hayun called out to me as I walked with a stiff expression.

I certainly didn’t want to make Hayun worry. After all, it wasn’t her fault.

If I had to blame something, it was my own selfish desire—my personal wish to keep secrets from others.

I could feel the other kids, who hadn’t shown much reaction before, glancing at me while talking among themselves.

I wasn’t sure why they were doing that. There had always been kids who looked at me that way.

Maybe their gazes contained admiration. Because I was a Magical Girl.

But if that wasn’t it…

Hayun must have quickly sensed my mood, as she just closed her mouth.

I hadn’t meant to make Hayun uncomfortable too—or maybe I had.

After all, this situation happened because I kept hiding something I should have told her long ago, so regardless of my intentions, I was responsible.

When we arrived at school, the atmosphere of students whispering while looking at me grew even thicker.

“Hey, Jieun…”

Hayun finally couldn’t hold back and called out to me.

It had been a really long time since I’d seen this atmosphere.

Hayun, who had almost always worn a bright expression since becoming a Magical Girl with me, was trembling slightly, just like in middle school when she’d become anxious after overhearing kids talking behind her back.

But this time, I was the cause.

“It’s okay.”

I told Hayun.

“I’ll tell you everything, just… a little later.”

Since homeroom was about to start.

But I knew I wouldn’t be able to tell her easily.

Clearly, I would keep postponing it—saying that class was next, that break time was too short to talk—I knew I would keep putting it off.

Because that’s who I am.

Even becoming a Magical Girl wasn’t something I sought out myself—it happened because Hayun introduced me to it first.

Yes, if I had thought I had talent, I would have gone to headquarters and knocked on their door myself.

In the end, just as I expected, I couldn’t bring myself to tell Hayun anything until it was almost lunchtime.

*

Thinking I was hiding something from her, Hayun’s mood grew more dejected as time passed.

It seemed Hayun really hadn’t read the article.

Plus, with other kids whispering while looking in “our direction,” and me clearly knowing something but not telling her, she probably thought they were talking about her.

Too scared to find out directly, yet thinking I wouldn’t tell her if she asked—that’s why she was so dejected.

“…”

In the end, I was the one who couldn’t bear the atmosphere any longer.

I grabbed Hayun’s dejected wrist and, like in middle school, took her somewhere private.

During lunch break, students were scattered all around the school.

Since becoming a Magical Girl, I hadn’t felt the need to hide away with Hayun during lunch, so I didn’t know many secluded spots in this high school.

So it took some time to find one.

With about 15 minutes of lunch break remaining, I finally succeeded.

The answer was the rooftop.

The door should have been locked, but the lock must have rusted and broken, as it was open.

I took Hayun up to the rooftop without hesitation.

And immediately spoke.

“First of all, the rumors going around aren’t about you.”

“Oh, okay.”

When I spoke so firmly, Hayun seemed to momentarily forget her worries, opening her eyes wide and nodding.

Did I speak too hastily?

No, seeing the effect, this was the right approach.

“The rumors… are about me.”

“…About you, Jieun?”

“Yes.”

I fidgeted with my hands, stalling.

I thought it didn’t matter anymore. Now Hayun and I were almost in the same position, and within the Magical Girl group, I was quite close to the center.

At this point, even if people found out I lived in an orphanage, no one around me would look down on me for it.

Seohee, Yeonwoo, Jua, Chaeyeon—they all had conflict elements in the original story, but they weren’t fundamentally bad kids. They were Magical Girls, after all.

Weren’t they children fighting with hope?

So, even though it shouldn’t matter…

Even though it was strange to still consider it a shameful secret…

“Jieun.”

Hayun gently took my hands.

Her hands holding both of mine were warm.

When I raised my head, which I had unconsciously lowered, Hayun was looking at me with a smile.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

Seeing that smile, which had washed away all her previous anxiety, I was dumbfounded.

“If telling me would hurt you, I don’t need to hear it.”

I see.

Right. This was the kind of person Hayun had always been.

She’s sensitive about stories concerning herself. That’s unavoidable. We’re sensitive teenagers. No, even as adults, it’s natural to be hurt and bothered if someone talks behind your back.

On the other hand, it’s natural to be curious about others’ stories. Especially if it’s about a long-time friend.

But Hayun was saying it was okay. Even if everyone else knew my story, she was saying I didn’t have to tell her if it was difficult for me.

“…”

Facing someone like this, I didn’t want to hide my past anymore.

Right.

Everyone else already knew, didn’t they? Hayun being the only one who didn’t know… I didn’t like that.

I squeezed Hayun’s hands that were holding mine and raised my head.

“Hayun.”

“Yes?”

“Actually, I—”

I paused.

Swallowing hard, I finally opened my mouth again.

“I don’t have parents.”

“Huh?”

Hayun’s eyes widened.

Her expression showed she hadn’t expected this kind of story. Her eyes darted around in confusion.

“And… I live in an orphanage, yes. An article about it came out yesterday.”

“Oh, I see.”

Hayun nodded at my words.

She still seemed a bit confused.

About me living in an orphanage? About me not having parents?

But Hayun’s confusion wasn’t about that.

Blink. Blink.

Hayun’s eyes blinked.

Silence fell between us.

I was trembling slightly while tightly holding Hayun’s hands.

I was scared. Scared that Hayun might look at me with pitying eyes. I always wanted to stand beside Hayun.

I didn’t want either of us to be “beneath” the other.

But as if my fears were unfounded, Hayun, still confused, opened her mouth.

“So…”

Hayun paused briefly to think again, then asked:

“So what’s the bad rumor about you?”

“…Huh?”

“I mean, you’re talking about what people have been whispering about since this morning, right?”

“Oh, yes.”

This time I was the one who asked, dumbfounded.

“And there’s some kind of rumor that’s difficult for you to talk about?”

“Yes.”

“Then what’s that rumor?”

Hayun looked up at me with a genuinely confused expression, as if she really didn’t understand.

It was as if the story about my parents and the orphanage didn’t matter at all.

No, not that it didn’t matter—she didn’t even recognize it as a problem.

…

Well, it wasn’t really a problem to begin with.

That’s true, but…

I felt the strength drain from my legs. If Hayun hadn’t been standing in front of me, I probably would have just collapsed on the floor.

“That’s the rumor.”

“Huh? What you just said?”

“Yes.”

“That you live in an orphanage…?”

“Yes.”

“Why is that a problem?”

Hayun tilted her head in confusion.

It felt… empty somehow.

Empty, and a strange feeling tickled my heart.

“I guess that’s the issue.”

“That?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Hayun asked again like a parrot. Still confused, she tilted her head from side to side several times.

“Sometimes, people find that fact itself strange.”

“…”

Hayun fell silent for a moment, lost in thought.

“I see. Okay, I understand.”

Hayun said that and let go of my hands.

And then,

“…Hayun.”

Hayun came closer and silently pulled me into a tight hug.

Then she patted my back.

“You don’t need to worry about what people say.”

“…Okay.”

Those were the words I used to comfort Hayun when she was upset in the past.

Sometimes, Hayun did nothing wrong, but there were kids who talked behind her back out of jealousy for her family’s wealth.

They’d say she must have a bad personality because she’s rich.

They’d say there must be something wrong with her because she’s rich.

As if they didn’t realize that they were the ones being bad and strange.

So now the situation was reversed.

Not comforting me for living in an orphanage, but comforting me for being in this situation for such a reason.

“…”

For a while, I just stood there in Hayun’s embrace with my arms hanging limply.

I felt strangely empty yet not entirely bad.

A thorn had been pulled from my heart, leaving an empty space, but somehow I felt it would heal quickly with Hayun by my side.

I stood like that for a while, and afterward, I stopped caring about what the other kids whispered.

I thought this empty place would soon stop hurting.

Until that weekend, when someone claiming to be my mother appeared in front of the orphanage.