Ch.26Winter (4)

The street that had been so crowded before was unusually quiet today as I slowly shifted my gaze around.

Back then, it was a bit better with Rofena and Sir Chris around.

I couldn’t understand why the air became so awkward whenever I was alone with Airin like this.

When we first met, didn’t I chatter away easily?

I had no idea where that courage had gone. Now all I could do was timidly move my lips before closing my mouth again.

If we could just have some conversation, this atmosphere would ease up,

but Airin was also keeping quiet, making an uncomfortable silence seem to envelop us.

Thud, thud.

When I heard the sound of footsteps walking without knowing their destination,

I could only smile bitterly at this suffocating silence.

This wasn’t quite the outing I had imagined.

I thought we would at least exchange some conversation.

Even after a long while, there was only silence between us, so I just gazed steadily at Airin.

Seeing that we’d walked this far without buying anything, whatever she was looking for wasn’t something for everyday use.

Not books, papers, or writing instruments. And not accessories or jewelry either. What could she be planning to buy?

When I suddenly turned my gaze, I couldn’t help but laugh wryly at the large sign visible ahead.

[Verde Weapons Shop]

“…My lady?”

When she stopped in front of the weapons shop, I opened my mouth with a puzzled expression.

If she stopped here, could it be because of what I mentioned earlier?

Airin glanced at me briefly, then answered with an expressionless face.

“You said you needed a sword. Let’s go buy one.”

“You’re really buying one for me?”

“…Did you think I was joking?”

Looking displeased, Airin narrowed her eyes for a moment before turning her head abruptly and walking into the weapons shop.

What on earth was she thinking?

She had never spent money like this before, so I couldn’t understand why she was acting this way today.

I could only stare at her in bewilderment.

#

I never knew that choosing a birthday present could be this difficult.

I had thought I could just buy something expensive.

But once we actually came out, I began to wonder if that would truly satisfy him.

Even I didn’t always like expensive gifts,

so Evan probably wouldn’t be genuinely happy with something he didn’t like.

So what should I buy?

Since this was my first time giving a gift to someone else, I felt completely lost.

I briefly thought about asking Rofena when she was making a fuss about preparations, but I shook my head and dismissed the thought.

Perhaps I should try asking indirectly?

It was rather amusing that I unconsciously wanted to see him happy,

but isn’t it natural to want the recipient of a birthday gift to be pleased?

Walking along lost in thought, I turned my head to look at my knight.

His golden hair, infused with moonlight, sparkled so brightly that I blinked.

When I inadvertently turned my gaze to those green eyes looking at me, a gentle voice flowed into my ears.

“By the way, what did you come out to buy?”

Your birthday present.

I wanted to say this, but then there would be no point in coming out without saying anything.

So what came out of my mouth was essentially an indirect way of asking what he wanted.

“…Just something I need to buy. Is there anything you want to buy, Evan?”

“Well…”

The least desired answer came out, making me laugh wryly.

I wished he would speak more honestly.

I realized once again how difficult it was to prepare for the birthday of a knight who never talked about what he wanted.

My eyes grew cold, and just as I was about to confront him, Evan spoke.

“I do need a few swords.”

Swords. My eyes lit up at those words.

Of course, he had been training a lot lately, so he probably needed swords.

The sword given by the Duke was ceremonial, so he might be reluctant to use it regularly. Perhaps that’s why he mentioned this to me.

My chest felt a little lighter, and I exhaled softly.

A sword I would give him. This would be the first time I gave a sword to a knight, so I wasn’t sure what to give.

But perhaps just the fact that I was giving something for the first time had meaning.

How many times had we walked like this, just the two of us? The thought that came to mind was that this was the first time.

First, this and that, everything was the first time, making this moment feel so new.

I met him in summer, and now it was winter, so this season was also a first.

Why did that word give such a warm feeling? The heat rising in my chest felt awkward.

In winter, how could I feel such warmth?

After entering the town, my eyes searched for a weapons shop.

Since my knight said he wanted a sword, finding the best sword would be an appropriate response.

Although I didn’t know much about swords, I at least knew that the weapons shops in this duchy were famous.

Yuris, the shield protecting the northern part of the empire, needed strong military power and corresponding weapons to earn that title.

If a weapon couldn’t be found in Yuris, it probably didn’t exist in this world.

After walking for a while, we reached a weapons shop, and my knight looked at me with a puzzled expression.

Was he disappointed that we came to such a weapons shop?

But the words from his mouth were so different from what I thought, they almost made me feel unpleasant.

“Are you really buying this for me?”

I frowned involuntarily. Was he implying that I was too stingy to buy a sword for my knight?

That’s how his words sounded to me. Even if he didn’t mean it that way, my pride was already deeply wounded.

“…Did you think I was joking?”

I thought one sword would be enough. Apparently, Evan had momentarily forgotten what kind of person his charge was.

The Lady of Yuris, the next Shield—though I didn’t particularly like those titles, at this moment I would show behavior befitting them.

Taking large strides into the shop, I was approached by a man with a long black mustache and a greedy expression.

Though I didn’t like the way he patted his protruding belly,

now wasn’t the time to worry about such things, so I looked at him and spoke.

“What’s the best sword you have here?”

“…The best sword would be one that arrived recently, but it’s not cheap. Would you like to see it?”

The quality of the sword and its price—none of that mattered.

From the moment I entered this weapons shop, my choice was already made.

My hand rose and pointed to all the swords from the entrance to the far corner of the room.

“Send them all to the Duke’s mansion.”

Buying everything would be the fastest, wouldn’t it?

There was no need to examine each one; if I bought them all, they would eventually be used someday.

The unused ones could be given to the knights. Money? I had never worried about such things in my life.

Even if I bought everything here, it would only empty one jewelry box.

A look of surprise flashed across that greedy face,

and then the merchant, bowing much lower than before, began to ramble.

“T-the Duke’s mansion?”

“Is there more than one Duke’s mansion here?”

“N-no, of course not!”

When I gave him a cold look, he began to bow repeatedly like a broken machine.

Though he looked quite pitiful, that wasn’t important. What expression was my knight making?

Turning to look behind me, Evan was just staring at me with wide eyes and a bewildered expression.

“My lady? What is this…”

“Didn’t I say I’d buy you a sword? I just bought them. They’ll all be sent to the Duke’s mansion, so you can choose what you want later.”

Somehow, laughter escaped me. Had I been expecting this expression from Evan?

As I gazed at him, Evan just stared blankly at the merchant who had started packaging the weapons, looking dumbfounded.

“Let’s go.”

Our business was done. This was enough to impress my authority upon my knight.

My footsteps passing by the dazed Evan felt lighter than ever before.

#

“Is it really okay for you to spend money like this? Just for me—”

“It’s not because of you. I just happened to buy swords while I was at it.”

“…But isn’t that too much to spend?”

Evan sighed and just smiled wryly, saying he didn’t understand anymore.

I was the one who spent the money, so why was he making such a fuss?

As I stared at him and then turned my gaze, what caught my eye was a familiar bookstore.

Was it the bookstore we visited the day we first met?

Perhaps noticing me staring blankly at the bookstore, Evan approached and spoke.

“It’s been quite a while. You haven’t been to the bookstore many times since then.”

“I’ve been busy.”

From tea parties to the founding day festival, and even the ball held by the Crown Prince, there hadn’t been much time to buy or read books.

In fact, it had been quite a while since I’d taken time to go out like this.

As I looked at the bookstore, it suddenly felt strange to be with Evan.

It was a natural thought when I recalled how I viewed Evan back then.

I thought he would disappear soon like other knights, but

he had been by my side for months now, with his appointment ceremony just around the corner.

He would continue to be my knight in the future. Unless someone killed him.

“Back then, I didn’t expect things to turn out like this. I actually thought I’d be fired soon.”

“…I’m sorry. For back then.”

“There’s no need to apologize. It’s all in the past now.”

I look at him as he shrugs lightly with a casual smile.

-Please be mindful of how you address me.

Recalling what I said to Evan back then, I frown involuntarily.

What was a mere form of address that I had to rebuke him so coldly?

Even though it was a title I disliked, I pushed him away just to keep him from getting close to me. Now I only regretted my past self.

“Lady Viscountess.”

At the voice that suddenly reached me, my body froze.

He was still smiling at me, and those green eyes were clearly filled with warmth.

Unlike before, I couldn’t understand why I was reacting so sensitively to that one phrase.

Suddenly my hand trembled, and I grabbed my arm with my other hand as I exhaled heavily.

What rose from my constricting chest was anxiety.

It was just a change in how he addressed me, but somehow it felt like he was drifting away forever. My trembling voice escaped through my quivering lips.

“…Evan.”

“You used to call me that. Not anymore though.”

“Evan.”

Perhaps finally noticing that my voice was different from before, Evan looked at me with concern.

The gaze directed at me was still warm.

That alone dispersed the anxiety in my chest, and I grabbed his sleeve and spoke again.

“Don’t… call me by that title.”

“…Pardon?”

I hated that title. No, to be precise, I hated that he called me by that title.

It felt like he was drawing a line between us, as if he would leave me and go somewhere after finally getting close.

I looked at him while barely managing to exhale the breath that had risen to my chin.

The voice that flowed from my lips felt so plaintive that the surrounding air seemed to tremble for a moment.

“Just you, please don’t call me that.”

Evan just stared at me blankly without saying anything.

Isn’t it funny? After trying so hard to push him away, now I wouldn’t even allow him to distance himself.

But there was no turning back now.

Wasn’t he the one who came to me, someone who understood me, someone who always smiled gently at me, someone I had longed for so much?

Then, I felt something warm touch my shoulder.

When I looked up, I saw green eyes more brilliant than the lights illuminating the town, and I unconsciously avoided his gaze.

It felt like heat was rising to my face. Despite the cold, my face was getting hot, which was just strange.

The body heat touching my shoulder was warm. Despite the chill that penetrated through my cloak,

that warmth melted even the cold, and the anxiety that had bloomed in my chest scattered in an instant.

I raised my head and looked at Evan’s face.

It should have been a face that wasn’t much different from usual,

but his face clearly revealed itself even in this deep darkness, as if bathed in moonlight.

Then, Evan’s face, which had been moving his lips as if to say something, began to harden.

A chill swept through his warm green eyes, and the hand that had been holding my shoulder stiffened.

He was tense. What on earth had he sensed?

“…My lady, I think you should move aside.”

“Evan…?”

I looked at him in confusion for a moment, then felt a deep darkness enveloping my body.

Looking up at the sky, the moon was no longer visible. All I could see was darkness so pitch-black it was chilling.

I remembered hearing about such darkness before, and my body also began to stiffen.

If my memory was correct, these were the ones who had disappeared from this world.

Darkness resembling pitch-black, darkness that made the whole body react with revulsion at the slightest touch—it clearly belonged to those I knew about.

During the most brilliant era of the empire, those who shattered that light and sang of destruction.

This darkness belonged to the black mages.