Ch.26The Third Ball (1)

Kirsy’s heart was pounding, but she couldn’t bring herself to look away.

As she gazed at the pictures, her imagination took flight.

It wasn’t just the act itself she was thinking about, but she could almost see the entire context surrounding it.

Kirsy’s eyes searched for an explanation.

This act of pressing lips together and intertwining tongues seemed to be called a “kiss.”

It appeared to be something shared between the closest of people. In other words, it was one of the most intimate expressions of affection that only lovers or spouses could share.

Kirsy already knew that pressing lips together wasn’t a casual act, but the moment she saw this thing called a kiss, she began to understand why.

It was so erotic.

And so thrilling.

Swallowing hard, Kirsy turned the page.

Her face filled with shock.

There were even more intense actions depicted.

She quickly closed the book and checked the cover.

‘Beginner’s Guide to Kissing.’

Her mind was in chaos.

She cooled her cheeks with the back of her hand as she thought.

“….This is supposed to be a beginner’s guide?”

In the end, it was only when Caden and Asena came looking for her that she snapped back to reality and managed to return the book to the shelf.

By then, she had already finished reading the entire book.

****

After lunch, we sat on the grass.

As always, sitting on this cool grass field and looking out at the wide-open plains reminds me of the Praester Family’s Territory.

When I think of the Praester territory, I feel at ease, and when I feel at ease, I smile.

Not just me, but Kirsy and even Asena were showing small smiles.

Asena in particular seemed to be in a good mood, almost humming, though it was so unlike her usual behavior that I couldn’t be sure.

We stayed like that for quite a while.

The day wasn’t particularly warm. The sky was cloudless, but there was a coolness in the air, perhaps from a northern wind.

Kirsy shivered beside me and said, “…Brr. It really is cold here.”

“Compared to home?”

“Yeah.”

As she spoke, Kirsy naturally moved her body toward me. She looked like she was about to burrow under my arm.

Just as she got close to me, she let out a small “Ah…” and began to watch my reaction.

Her eyes conveyed everything she wanted to say.

Honestly, I still didn’t feel like hugging them.

I liked the twins, but my wounds hadn’t healed yet.

If their desire to be in my arms wasn’t an act, then I wanted them to feel the weight of their words.

“…Brother.”

Kirsy called to me while poking my hand with her finger.

Since it was obvious what she wanted, my voice came out stern. I intended to refuse.

“What.”

“…Brother, I’m cold. Won’t you hug me?”

But when she spoke in that sweet voice with aegyo, it was really hard to refuse. Plus, saying she was cold triggered my protective instincts.

Is this really an act?

This voice makes me believe she genuinely wants to be in my arms.

Is this Kirsy different from the one who said I smelled bad and was incompetent?

“…Can’t you hug me now? Are you really never going to hug me again? I really like your smell…”

“…”

“…I don’t know who told you that you smell bad…but I think they were lying.”

She even used formal speech, which she typically does when she wants something, as she acted cute.

“…Lying?”

I’m intrigued when she mentions that it might be a lie.

“…Yes, brother.”

I can’t help it. I want to believe what makes me feel better. I want to believe that she didn’t really want to insult me, but somehow ended up telling those lies.

I want to believe that the Kirsy who insulted me isn’t her true self, but rather that the Kirsy in front of me now is her real self.

Before I knew it, Asena had also approached and was holding onto the hem of my clothes.

“…Brother, you don’t hate us, do you?”

She asks.

There’s no way I could hate them. My pain comes from the opposite reason.

I love them, but it doesn’t seem like they love me.

Otherwise, they wouldn’t threaten to expel me from the family, or gossip behind my back, or make my competition weapon shorter.

But then they show this side of themselves to my face… it’s so confusing.

“…”

I didn’t respond to their aegyo. As I said, I still didn’t feel like hugging them.

My childish feelings were holding me back.

“…Hmm?”

Whenever I’m troubled like this, I remember Grandmother Riana’s words.

I recall how she held both my hands and asked me to take care of my younger siblings.

Because I’m the eldest. Because they’re still lacking and need my care.

“….Haah…”

Right. I can’t keep going on like this. Especially not in this Academy.

It’s already hard enough when we get along. As the eldest… maybe I need to be the one to endure.

“Fine. Do as you please.”

As soon as the words left my mouth, Kirsy hugged my waist and slipped under my arm, while Asena rested her head on my shoulder.

“Haah…”

“…Thank goodness.”

The twins showed different reactions as they clung to me.

But my words weren’t finished.

I had no intention of letting this matter slide.

In fact, this was already a concession. My heart wasn’t fully at ease.

“…Let me ask you one thing, kids.”

I said.

“Sure, ask anything. Hehe. Ah… it feels so good to be in your arms, brother.”

“What is it?”

To my siblings who were smiling happily, I asked like a child craving love.

“…You love your brother, right?”

The twins answered without a moment’s hesitation. Kirsy even snorted as if the question was ridiculous.

“You’re asking the obvious, brother!”

“Yes.”

I nodded, then briefly detached them from me. Then I looked straight into their eyes.

“Will you continue to love me in the future?”

I don’t want to be hurt. I’m already tattered from several shocks. Enough to give gifts meant for them to another woman. Enough to keep my distance. I believe I’ve given them clear signals many times. Being betrayed isn’t easy.

Yet I reached out to them.

I pretended not to hear.

I even called them out today to spend the day together.

“When have we ever not?”

“What kind of request is that, brother?”

The twins said, but,

“No.”

Once more. I gave them a firm look.

“Keep loving your brother. Understand?”

This is a signal I’m sending to them.

Don’t hurt me anymore.

Don’t disappoint me.

There’s no need to explicitly tell them not to insult me.

If they love me, they wouldn’t do that.

“I’ll ask just this once…?”

With a difficult smile, I speak to them.

.

.

.

.

Asena on my lap.

Kirsy under my arm.

The twins, who were clinging to me more than ever before, showed no signs of letting go.

We came here after lunch, and now it’s almost evening.

My waist ached and my legs were numb.

“Kids, we should head back now.”

I’ve achieved some of my goals today.

I had been thinking that our relationship might have been strained because we haven’t spent time like this recently.

Today we had a pleasant time together, and the atmosphere was good, so I think we’ll be able to greet each other amicably for at least a few days.

“Oh, right.”

At my words, Asena naturally brought something up.

I couldn’t shake the suspicion that she deliberately mentioned this now to thwart my suggestion.

I looked at Asena lying on my lap.

I was naturally stroking her hair.

“Brother. You know about the ball that’s coming up soon, right?”

She said, feeling my touch.

“Ball?”

It was Kirsy, not me, who reacted with surprise.

Asena slightly frowned.

“…Kirsy. Don’t tell me you forgot? You’re in the Political Science department.”

“Ah, hehe… I think I did hear about it.”

“You should at least remember these schedules.”

Before Kirsy could get scolded more, I intervened.

“So what about the ball?”

Kirsy, seemingly appreciating my consideration, smiled and hugged me tighter.

Asena also closed her eyes and sighed.

“…I think we need to decide how we’re going to act now.”

“Hmm.”

A ball is ultimately the perfect place to get to know people. Many alliances, many connections, and even enemies are made at balls.

For a ducal family like ours, it’s not a place we can visit with a light heart.

Various families under our command will also be there, and those we don’t get along with… like the Ice Family, for example, will appear, so we need to prepare to some extent.

I wasn’t completely ignorant about these things, but I had already entrusted everything to the twins.

There’s no need for me to suggest any methods. I just need to follow the strategy they set.

“So. What’s the plan?”

“Let’s not do anything.”

My hand, which had been stroking Asena’s hair, stopped.

Even though I don’t know much… this is quite an unusual approach.

Shouldn’t we at least greet allied families and hostile families?

There are so many baronial families and below, and unless you’re in the Political Science department, you might not even recognize their members, so we might have to wait, but shouldn’t we at least meet the second and third sons, or daughters of ducal families who haven’t entered the Political Science department?

When I looked at Asena with a confused expression, she added an explanation.

“This time, if we just wait, other families will come to us on their own. We don’t need to move around. I’m the head of the Praester Family. My position is different from other nobles.”

Her answer made immediate sense.

“Ah. I see.”

“Yes.”

Kirsy momentarily widened her eyes and made an “Umm…” sound while checking Asena’s reaction.

Asena sighed at that sound and asked.

“…What?”

“…Um… sister. Does that mean we’re really just going to sit there the whole time?”

Kirsy’s eyes scanned me once.

“…Without even dancing?”

Asena, who was lying on my lap, also looked up at me. After pondering Kirsy’s words for a moment, she shrugged.

“…If we have time, we might dance one song with brother.”

“Hmm?”

Now it was my turn to tilt my head.

“Me?”

“Who else would I dance with if not you?”

Seemingly unaware that my legs were starting to go numb, Asena asked with a stern expression.

“No, can I even be with you two in the first place?”

Asena slightly frowned and sat up.

As blood began to flow back into my legs… Kirsy filled that space.

“What do you mean, brother?”

I answered Asena.

“Is it okay for me to be with you two, the eldest daughters of the Praester Family? Don’t you have conversations you need to have without me-“

“Brother.”

Asena interrupted me.

And as if warning me, she came close enough that I could feel her breath and said,

“…Don’t think about being separated from me at the ball.”

At that moment, Kirsy seemed to realize something, saying “Ah” and nodding with an expression as serious as Asena’s.

“…That’s right. Brother. Stay with us.”

…I tried not to read too much into these words.