Ch.24581. Song of Curses and Resentment.

# “Asserath Endraig,”

The time of the sun has passed.

Yet the time of the moon has not arrived.

With his back to the horizon where light and darkness split, he stood with hands behind his back, discussing that name.

Blue short hair, each strand just barely reaching the nape of his neck.

In contrast, his clothes were a vivid green.

A green mantle covering from shoulders to waist, wrapping both front and back.

Below, despite pants that didn’t even reach his knees, all sorts of things hung from his waist.

On his left waist hung a small booklet that could fit in one’s palm.

On his right, vials of various colors.

Even on his thighs and calves were leather straps, from which knives and… a sling for throwing stones hung conspicuously.

“That name, do you know who it is?”

“……”

Asess Endraegon.

Is he talking about her?

The problem is, why would that name come from his mouth of all people?

“Eras. You….”

At that point, Kariel fell silent.

And from there, he remained quiet for a long while.

Then.

“What’s with the dramatic pause? If you’re going to say something, say it! Otherwise, don’t bother. If you’re going to interrupt me, at least follow through with something substantial.”

“You……”

Finally, Kariel broke his silence.

“You’ve got some nerve showing up before me.”

“Why? It’s not like we can’t see each other’s faces, right?”

“……”

Kariel realized that even his habitual sighs and hollow laughs wouldn’t come.

Moreover, right now… he wasn’t in a state where he could control his emotions smoothly like before.

-Kill him? Why are you holding back? He’s shown himself so brazenly, why not kill him?! How long will you just endure?

-Child, let’s enjoy bloodshed on this occasion. Shall we not raise a merry toast with that child’s thick blood?

-What a pretty child. It would be worth breaking. But first, let’s taste the flesh. Aren’t you curious about that texture too?

-Massacre! It’s a massacre! Kill him! Stab him to death! Crush him to death! Boil him to death! Fry him to death! By all means, kill him! Kill! Kill him! Don’t kill him right away! I want to hear screams! Long! Louder! More vigorously! Make him scream as if cursing the whole world!

“……”

As he wavered, the suppressed voices rose up in unison.

If there was one thing she could be grateful to the Golden Demon Lord for now…

It was making “me” as a human being utterly bland.

…If I hadn’t become such an emotionless, bland human being.

I would have lost control at this moment, buried in the torrent of malice flowing in, and gone berserk without restraint.

…Then, in the true sense, I might have become the demon lord the Empress glimpsed in her prophetic dream.

“Do you truly wish to die?”

When anger reaches its extreme, there comes a point where consciousness seems to break off naturally.

Some might say that when anger reaches its peak, one becomes calm instead.

…But if even that is surpassed, in keeping with the essence of rage, something must be expressed or burst forth.

“I don’t want to die yet.”

Regardless of my inner turmoil, he remained composed.

I’m not sure if even that was an act.

But I had not the slightest intention of considering or accommodating that.

Empathy and understanding were even more out of the question.

I refuse to understand him.

I don’t want to understand him.

Therefore, whatever thoughts or ideas he harbors, they are none of my concern.

“……”

The reason I’m pretending to listen to him patiently is because in my current state, I could twist or break if I don’t control my emotions and will.

If he had appeared at a different time rather than now, I would have done something, one way or another.

Even though I knew this would happen, here we are.

As he said, I had deliberately twisted my path to avoid encountering him until I reached Facelan.

If I hadn’t come here at this point, Raymon would have lost his remaining arm as well.

The young king of Facelan would soon have been poisoned and died in his bed, unable to leave until his death.

After that… the nobles’ treasonous acts to sell the country to the Empire would reach their peak, but the Empire would strictly draw the line and withdraw when the agreed time ended.

Afterward, that country would have its limbs completely torn off by neighboring countries.

…Then the suffering would fall on the people, not the nobles.

The very ones who ruined and destroyed the country would scatter to various places and build their own lives.

…Even as their own countrymen and kinsmen were thrown into a living hell, they would drink wine stained with blood, accompanied by well-cooked meat dripping with oil and covered in spices, and soft bread, steadily filling their bellies.

[Before… my comrades and I would hunt them down and kill them all.]

Delica had told me that was what she did in her previous world, when she was an adult and fighting.

[Here too, they should be waiting with their necks washed. Because I haven’t forgotten, and their essence hasn’t changed one bit.]

What did Kariel himself say then?

“……”

As you wish.

Although their fate and fortune aren’t completely empty yet…

…In terms of the law of cause and effect, since Delica’s existence is also a kind of principle, even what she desires is a kind of shackle, another natural order, and the fate they will face.

And so again, the wheel of cause and effect continues to climb hills and roll downhill without stopping or breaking.

“State your business. I don’t have time to listen to nonsense.”

“That’s harsh. It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other.”

“What do you gain by making my blood boil? Are you really confident I won’t lay hands on you?”

“It might not matter whether you do or not. I don’t know either.”

“……”

Indeed.

……He’s insane.

I heard that until just before leaving the Empire, he had been holed up in his room, let alone going outside.

His visitors were limited to Alesius.

Besides him, there were only employees, Seras… and the current Count Esdina.

…But I heard that he had been excommunicated and banished from the country.

Along with Alesius being thrown to the north.

“My master ordered it. He said Asserath is needed, so bring her back.”

“…Has something happened to your country’s bloodline?”

“Where did you hear that?”

“The reason for needing her is obvious, isn’t it?”

They want to reclaim someone they practically threw away?

Whatever the reason, it can’t be out of affection.

That’s… the old-fashioned stubbornness and petty face-saving of royalty and noble bloodlines.

“There’s no need to hide it, so I’ll tell you straight. In that country, all the royalty who could succeed to the throne are gone.”

“Have all her siblings died?”

“Even the king has gone. In their terms, to the paradise of Apple Tree Island.”

“……”

“There were strong movements to dismantle the dynasty and establish a new monarchy… but everyone’s tug-of-war is so intense that it’s ambiguous. The neighboring islands and archipelagos are ready to declare independence as soon as civil war breaks out, which is problematic.”

“……You know a lot.”

“My master has returned to Lutania. Have you heard of the Cyan Prophet?”

“……The one who follows prophecies.”

“Yes, that’s it!”

He clapped his hands together briefly near his face.

“So they want to make her queen, but ultimately they want to keep her by their side and swallow the whole country.”

“More precisely, the key issue is that no one has received legitimacy from the Lake Fairy. If they reject that and claim the crown… everyone will rise up.”

“Asess is the demon of the lake. A human cursed for rejecting the fairy’s expectations. Yet they want to call back that existence because they’re desperate?”

“Still, the Lake Fairy loved that bloodline. Isn’t that the reason?”

“……”

Kariel snorted.

“It must be because of a contract, agreement, or oath.”

Or perhaps, having lived for so long, too long…

The affection, or love-hate, for the first contractor might be too strong.

“But why does that give you reason to babble directly to me? Despite considering my anger?”

If he had sent a note or letter instead, I would have made my own judgment.

So in the end….

“You want me to go to Lutania with her. I see. You seem to know well that I’m heading to the Empire. The one who follows prophecies. Like your master, have you also gained the ability to glimpse the future, however crudely?”

That would explain how he managed to track me down.

“This is why humans who know the future have it easy. No need to waste words.”

“Then you must also know very well that I won’t do that.”

“That’s why I’m making an effort to change it.”

“Because that would lead to a better tomorrow for you and Alesius?”

“I won’t deny it. And for all the people of the Empire too.”

“Then I should deliberately reject your request.”

“Will you really do that?”

Whoosh.

A long breath escaped through the dark helmet, and even that wasn’t enough as it surged back inside, swirled, and lingered.

“Aren’t you resentful about being excommunicated? How abominable it is for someone like you to mention the people of the Empire… Did you think I would be moved even slightly by such a thing?”

“Looking at your actions, you seem obsessed with not letting anyone die or get hurt. That’s how you’ve always been, consistently.”

“I simply didn’t want innocent people to suffer unnecessary bloodshed because of me.”

Bearing my own burdens without transferring or redirecting the painful and difficult things to others.

If only everyone could do that, the world wouldn’t be called a living hell.

I didn’t want to act indifferently just because others didn’t care.

The reason I wanted to build my strength… was ultimately to escape from injustice.

That included, as Golden once mentioned, situations where I was too weak and had to kill someone, or ended up tormenting or cursing someone.

It was to willingly shake off such unreasonable and absurd coercion.

“……”

But Eras.

You are not included in that consideration.

The reason I’m not killing you now is because there’s a possibility that it might be a blessing for you.

Golden said it.

Simply killing you would be too much of a consideration.

There’s no greater mercy than that.

“Kariel. Your resentment towards me is justified. But I want you to remember that I resent you too.”

In that sense.

The nonsense he spouted when he betrayed me long ago.

It was cast before my face once again.

“After all, weren’t you the one who didn’t save me back then? I had to do whatever it took to survive. Even if that meant stabbing you in the back. And I paid the price later, didn’t I? Yet you demand additional payment with excommunication. Good heavens! I’ve moved past it! It’s all in the past! But you? You’ve been obsessing over it all this time? How dreadful, Kariel.”

“……”

“If you had noticed right away back then. And if you had saved me sooner, I wouldn’t have had to make that decision first, would I? Why do we make each other suffer like this, both you and I?”

“……”

“Lord Alesius is exceptional in that regard. Do you know this? Since he showed consideration, my grandfather’s beatings and the harassment within the family all disappeared.”

But you?

“You only said nice things. It was really good at first… but in the end, it was like an empty treasure chest with no hope or anything. You as a person.”

“Yes. You were betrayed because you had rash expectations. If that’s the case, it is indeed my responsibility.”

“You speak so venomously.”

“What you’re saying is even worse.”

He’s not trying to justify or rationalize his logic.

He’s simply chosen to believe, follow, and adhere to it.

So we.

“……”

Perhaps until one of us dies, or both of us die.

Until the end, as long as we live, we cannot forgive each other.

In a sense, the resentment directed at me might be absurd injustice itself.

Has he sustained his life by hating me?

How terribly twisted.

Perhaps it also included the reason that his admired sister had always harbored feelings, had been in love.

You cannot replace Seras.

So at least within me, whom she loved, you wanted to become a better person than Seras.

Did you end up harboring excessive expectations?

Or perhaps the me of that time inflated your expectations too much.

Either way, our relationship ended in tragedy.

This can no longer be reversed.

“Eras. My relationship with you has been the misfortune of my life.”

“……”

“And it seems that for you, your connection with me has become an absurd tragedy beyond imagination.”

Back then, I was a fool who put ideas and thoughts ahead of action.

I completely changed after being backstabbed by him.

Until we realize how painful it is to fall, we can hardly stop running here and there.

That’s what lessons are.

Only after getting hurt… only after realizing the pain….

“Haa… That’s right. I was prepared, but seeing you again, I really hate you.”

His face, which had been trying to maintain a smile, finally crumbled as he glared with wide eyes.

“Being excommunicated and expelled from the Empire, being abandoned by my sister, it’s natural to be angry and frustrated and distressed about all of it, isn’t it? All the technology and products I poured into the family were taken away too. It’s natural to be angry, isn’t it? And it was all because of you in the end!”

“…So, are you going to take revenge?”

“If I can! Of course I will! Absolutely!”

“Eras. Have you not even considered that I might hate you and Alesius as well?”

“……Then you come at me too. Bite me. Don’t just take it. You know what’s more annoying? With your prestigious background, innate talent, and exceptional abilities… what are you lacking that you live as if the world has collapsed? Have you lost your mother and father like me? Have you been beaten by your grandfather until your arms broke and your flesh tore?! Have you been intimidated by retainers?! How dare a mere maid! Me! How! How—!”

“……”

A child born blind is somewhat better off.

But if a child who has only seen the beauty of the world becomes blind.

……

But.

Even if that were the case.

“Don’t drag others into the hell where you dwell.”

“Kariel!”

“Stay buried there alone. You don’t even deserve to mock others.”

That is a patient.

A patient deeply infected by disease.

“If Alesius can embrace you, go whine to him. What’s the point of spewing disgust at me? Does it resolve or relieve anything?”

I don’t respond properly.

Even if his words make my blood boil.

I don’t show any sign of being disturbed or agitated.

To him, I appear utterly bland.

Perhaps I seem to have cut even the karmic hatred entangled with him.

…But to cut karma merely by vaguely ignoring, enduring, and turning away.

You and Alesius.

My father and mother.

And the countless evil connections entangled between them and me. The malicious karma formed as a result.

“Girl who built a useless tower. Unless you dismantle it first, there will be no salvation in your life.”

Also.

“…Unless you save yourself, you will neither be forgiven nor rescued, neither by me nor by yourself.”

It would be faster to be expelled.

“Yes. You’ve become so brazen that you can say such things now! You mess!”

“Actually.”

And there’s one thing you’re mistaken about, so I decided to tell you.

“You’re just collateral damage, so don’t loiter in my sight.”

“What? Collateral damage? Say that again? Collateral damage?!”

“…I haven’t gone through this damned journey to take revenge on you.”

“No?! Then who?! If not us, then who?!”

“……”

I had suspected since hearing about that other world from Delica.

This woman really….

“Are you afraid of what I’ve become?”

“As if I would be! What nonsense are you spouting! Have you grown a lot?!”

She’s lashing out.

“Eras. It would be easier if you were afraid.”

“Why?! Why should I!”

“……”

Only if you fear me.

Will you not dare to confront me.

I don’t care either way.

One way brings regret.

The other brings extreme joy.

“Asess… Yes. Is she in Abas?”

“……”

“Wasn’t that information you were going to tell me anyway? What changes by knowing in advance?”

I snort and turn my back.

“Eras. You’d better think carefully when you return. For a long time to come.”

“…Hey. Come with me.”

What?

“……”

I had turned my back and started walking away with somewhat cheerful feelings.

But that stupid remark made my mood plummet to its lowest.

“What insane nonsense is that?”

“We’re going the same way anyway, aren’t we?”

“And that’s reason enough to take you along?”

“If it’s bothersome, just kill me or do something to stop me from following, right?”

“……”

We were just cursing each other.

But that crazy woman was standing there with a playful smile all over her face, as if she had completely forgotten about it.

An innocent smile gleaming in the moonlight even in the darkness.

But it was so contradictory and heterogeneous that.

“……”

Yes. Is that the answer you’ve come up with?

I can only shake my head.

“Do as you please.”

“No complaints later?”

“……”

Dealing with the sick is tiring.

Even if they are truly innocent and pure.

Because due to the disease, that purity and innocence will be easily defiled and muddied.

It seems that because he was weak, only by throwing himself away could he face life.

That current appearance must be proof of that.

From the beginning, I don’t want to understand him.

So whether it’s extreme acting or trying to prove malice through deadly poison and schemes.

For me….

“……”

It’s no longer my concern.

You just need to unilaterally face my existence when the promised day of your reception comes.

There’s no consideration, mercy, forgiveness, or permission there.

It depends solely on my mood.

I will escape fate and destiny.

Only then.

Next, according to my will, my fate and the fate of those I desire.

I shall duly coordinate.

So pray to your gods.

That I find it utterly impossible to do anything.