Ch.233Yuyeol’s Hall. Harpoon Bay (1)

“I’m ramming it into the sleek, soft, squeaky, clanking, creaking frame of the Sky Warden!!!”

Surprisingly, those words came from a human mouth.

I could understand up to “sleek and soft,” but how exactly was I supposed to interpret “squeaky, clanking, creaking frame”…

So there I was, blankly staring at a bearded man in his 40s who was pressed against the wall, rubbing his entire body against the ship’s frame.

“No! Gilliam! Snap out of it!”

“Every single rivet in the frame! Every subtly visible welding seam is so erotic! Are you a genius at making engineers angry?!?!”

I couldn’t help but clutch my head.

Is this… human nature?

I wondered how anyone could possibly have such sexual desires.

Seriously, if the private who used engine oil as a sex toy was considered normal, and the sergeant who shoved 15mm bullets up his rear was just a rookie, then this maintenance worker must be completely insane.

“Damn it! Someone call the military police!”

“Impregnate meeeee!!!!”

The maintenance worker called Gilliam howled as he began mounting the frame, and the resonating clangs were driving me crazy.

“…”

This all happened within just two minutes of landing at Harpoon Bay.

The soldiers had completely lost their minds, and as mentioned above… there was now an engineer rubbing his crotch against the main frame of the Sky Warden while spouting obscenities so vulgar they could hardly be considered human speech.

“By the Sun. It wasn’t this bad in Fernheim…”

Karyl is the god of battle and war. The god of blood and bone.

But since combat and war require at least minimal rationality, people didn’t go this insane there.

However, this is Harpoon Bay, the birthplace of the god of lust, nicknamed the Hall of Carnal Heat.

Medina presides over lust—love and pleasure.

“Let me go! That seductive thing wants my juice!”

“Tie Gilliam down!”

“Pweee-pipipipipi-pweepwee!”

“Taser! Taser!”

But for pleasure like that, wouldn’t castration be better…

With that thought, I summoned the brigade commander and battalion commanders.

I had a sliver of hope that these men with some education in their heads wouldn’t engage in such… ‘vulgar’ behavior.

“You called for us, sir…”

And upon my summons, officers who had become walking corpses in just a few days lined up weakly before me in the captain’s quarters.

After seeing that lunatic rubbing himself against the ship’s frame, I was already drained, but I couldn’t even imagine the hardships these officers had endured living alongside the soldiers.

“Can you… control the troops?”

When I asked, the brigade commander immediately shook his head, and the battalion commanders weakly did the same.

“Haah… Have all the soldiers disembark for now. Give them some silver coins to let them release some tension, and after they’ve spent time with prostitutes, they might improve somewhat… Are you all okay?”

“Apart from masturbating five times a day, we’re managing.”

Ah… so that’s why they looked so haggard?

I’m not sure if that’s fortunate or unfortunate. But I suppose it’s good that they can maintain their sanity after releasing.

“You all should take some money from the storage too… You need to eat something good to regain your strength. I’ll contact you if anything comes up.”

“Understood…”

Somehow, despite being the god of pleasure and affection, Medina only brings us discomfort and hardship.

But what can we do? I am an apostle of the Sun, and the once-human god here doesn’t welcome me.

*

“Sex! Sex! Sex!”

“Our lord has given us money for pleasure!”

Watching my soldiers march off, instantly transformed into lust demons, I sighed through the window of the captain’s quarters.

The problem is that there’s nothing to do at the birthplace of the god of lust.

At least in Fernheim, there was the Colosseum as a destination. I came here because it’s a famous place, but the only thing to do here is… well, literally just have sex.

Of course, there are many other ways to enjoy pleasure. But those methods involve drugs or gambling, which I, as a knight, couldn’t casually engage in.

Besides, I never enjoyed such things anyway.

“Captain. Then as we discussed before, I’ll look into companies that can handle the ship’s modifications.”

“Ah. Yes. Please do.”

But while there might be nothing to do, there were things that needed to be done.

Namely, strengthening the Sky Warden.

Harpoon Bay, true to its name, was a port city where ships could come and go, and since artistic perfection was included in pleasure and enjoyment, there was no reason we couldn’t modify our ship here.

And… as we just saw, with perverts who get excited by welding seams and rivet marks everywhere, they wouldn’t do a sloppy job with the modifications…

They’d probably become impotent if they did poor work.

We also needed to expand our forces, but… that would require space for additional personnel, so the ship modifications had to come first.

“Boss! Can we go out and have fun too?”

As I watched the soldiers being absorbed into the nearby red-light district like fish caught in a current, Raisha and Kasia approached me.

They had changed from their combat uniforms into casual clothes, and had stuffed money into their pockets haphazardly, looking exactly like wealthy nouveau riche arriving at an entertainment district.

“Sure… Just have fun responsibly. Don’t get wasted on cocktails.”

“Why do you automatically assume we’re going to drink?!”

Why would I think that… The accumulated big data proves that you’re alcohol-elves who can’t survive without booze…

“So you’re not going to drink?”

“Well, I didn’t say that.”

Should I kill them?

Be patient, Merciful Victor within me. Getting angry here would only mean I’d have to pay the medical bills in the end.

“What are the dwarves doing?”

“They’re upgrading weapons in the storage room. Said they suddenly had an ‘artistic inspiration.'”

“I see…”

I don’t know if this is also Medina’s doing or if it just came to them naturally. Is it because this is my first time experiencing this kind of trial?

I’m so used to numbness that I don’t know how to deal with sensory overload.

It’s fortunate that I’m an aura user and in a position to command others. If not, my personal safety would have been at risk.

*

“Wow….”

“This is the most delicious thing I’ve ever eaten!”

However, since I didn’t want to stay on the ship either, and I had plenty of money, I decided to dine at the finest restaurant.

And that reaction above showed that while our mess hall cooks had done their best, military food quality couldn’t match that of a proper restaurant, and the taste of this current meal was proof of that.

How could they create such a deep flavor from mere seafood? I had only eaten clam chowder, but I could feel a “wow, this is amazing” vibe resonating from deep within my body.

Is this… the skill of a chef?

“I’m honored by your praise.”

“Your skill is exceptional. I chose a good establishment. I’d like to try some meat dishes now, do you have any recommendations?”

“Our veal dishes are renowned in our establishment. The tender meat paired with red wine is exquisite. How does that sound?”

“That sounds perfect. Two servings of veal and a bottle of red wine. Chilled, please.”

“Certainly, Lord Victor. Please wait a moment.”

Pleasure naturally includes fine dining.

Perhaps tasting food worthy of being offered to the gods is the very reason for Harpoon Bay’s existence?

Before long, the veal dish with bubbling juices and wine in an ice-filled bucket arrived, and we finished our clam chowder before starting to cut the meat.

Taking a bite of the sliced meat, it was beyond excellent—it was masterful. The tenderness and aroma that swirled in my mouth could make all the meat I’d eaten before seem tough and rancid by comparison.

This dish, which truly melted in the mouth, would be incomplete without wine.

As I swirled my glass, the waiter uncorked the bottle with elegant movements and filled both our glasses. We clinked them together in a toast.

“To our eternal marriage.”

The glasses clinked with a bright sound.

The meal accompanied by the deep aroma of red wine swirling in the glass was satisfying, and the sight of my wife smiling brightly with meat juices on her lips was incredibly beautiful.

Could there be a woman as beautiful as her in the world?

Pure yet passionate, enchanting yet innocent.

As long as there remains in this world a pure woman who looks only at me and dedicates her love only to me, all men born from their mothers’ wombs or assembled by mechanical arms in factories have a reason to fight to the death.

Even if it were Maria herself, she wouldn’t be more beautiful than my wife.

[My wife is prettier]

Convert to another religion if you don’t shut up.

[….]