Ch.215Report on the Collapse of Patience (8)

The sleet had stopped and the sun rose high. It wasn’t refreshing, though. The mud and ice mixed on the road stuck to their shoes.

The mud kept grabbing at their feet as if telling them to stop. When forcibly lifted, it clung to their shoes. Sticky, slippery, and heavy. Because of this, the group unanimously stopped to shake off the mud on curbs, yellowed patches of grass, or stone surfaces. Fist-sized clumps of mud fell with a thud.

The villagers were indifferent. The fatigue from the festival still lingered. Their expressions were dazed and their movements sluggish, but people were starting another new day nonetheless. They hung large pots in their yards and boiled water.

They pulled carts drawn by mules and headed to work. The mud devoured even the wheels, but the mules’ stubbornness seemed equally formidable. And so the mules pressed on eastward.

Kain silently gazed beyond them.

The Wasteland. Where shadows undulated. Where the sin of being born with the Empire pooled like a puddle. A barren land where the resentment of those who died innocently lingered. An unholy land where all the world’s hatred, loathing, darkness, and shadows reluctantly gathered. And the land where the Demon King lived.

So the army of justice had to march with their flags raised. Heroes had to emerge to confront the Demon King of terror, defeat evil, and bring goodness to the world. It was a simple and sensible matter.

But after accepting the mission, everything had turned upside down.

Far from being respected, the heroes committed terrible sins and debauchery. Those who laid a curse on the Wasteland, once a verdant land, were the priests of shadow and darkness, a faction of the Life Tree Order. But the reason they did such a thing was because the Empire, the Church, and the priests of light and fire had massacred their families who lived in the Wasteland.

Hadn’t Elisabet told him? The two factions of the Life Tree Order—the priests of light and fire sided with the Empire and the Two-headed Eagle Faith, while the priests of shadow and darkness remained by the side of the king and those who adhered to the old faith. Though fewer in number, it was the side of darkness that was labeled heretical and hunted like beasts.

She hadn’t said that the survivors were evil and the dead were good. She said they were all just ordinary people, regardless of good, evil, or neither. However, she did say that those who were forcibly relocated to the Wasteland, once a green land, and died senselessly, were innocent.

To avenge the innocent, the priests of darkness cursed the land, scattered, and secretly built up their forces. They believed their treacherous brothers and sisters had stolen and extorted what was rightfully theirs.

Poetic justice. Karma… But what meaning did those things have now?

Kain was confused. He didn’t know how much the descendants should compensate and repay for the sins committed by the Empire, the Church, and their ancestors. It’s easy to say, “That was too long ago. It has nothing to do with the people living now.”

What about the people of this village then?

The reason these people survived until now was because they drove out the boys and girls living in the village. If those children hadn’t joined the Children’s Crusade, the village’s fate would have been very different.

Milena’s mind isn’t sound. Her testimony can’t be fully trusted. Of course, if it’s true, the former village chief—the father-in-law of the new groom Müller—should be punished for intimidation, fraud, and coercion. Even so, the priest who was threatened passed away long ago. Even if they were to assign blame, what would change?

‘Should I tell Laios the truth?’

He too is a sinner. Kain remembers what he did. But weren’t Laios and Ismene also thoroughly used and abandoned? The reason Laios somehow gets up is because of faith. The belief that he and Ismene are true heroes.

But the truth is different. They were merely deceived by boasts and lies. If Milena’s words are correct.

“It’s not certain information, is it?”

In the end, Kain heaved a deep sigh. The white breath disappeared without a trace. Only an inexplicable emptiness remained in the air. Lily and Maria also understood Kain’s words.

“We’ll just have to take note of it.”

Maria fell silent again after those words. Lily looked east with a heavy expression. People were far away, and only they were in the flower bed next to the square.

“You said the Demon King wasn’t there from the beginning, but was ‘created’ when the Church designated one, right?”

It’s true that those who set foot in the Wasteland suffer from extreme fear. But the form of that fear differed from person to person.

The fearful memories each person harbors, terrible imaginations, unspeakable things, things that crawl up from the horizon of thought.

Those couldn’t be the same.

In the Wasteland, people confronted what they had pushed to the bottom of their consciousness. The closer they got to the center, the more terrible things people saw. The kind and good people, those who feared themselves, dropped out early, and those who stood at the center were the most shameless ones, those whose greed was stronger than their sense of self.

But even they saw the Demon King differently. Those who fought against invisible illusions finally concretized the form of the Demon King. By sealing it within Ismene.

At that moment, Ismene became the Demon King—visible to everyone’s eyes, appearing the same to everyone who looked. So they could defeat it, tear it apart, and divide it among themselves.

So there was no Demon King. When they designated “Ismene is the Demon King,” she simply became the Demon King.

“That’s right, Lily.”

Hearing Kain’s answer, Lily sadly shook her head.

“The heroes were the same. Created. Used. Abandoned. The Seven Heroes weren’t heroes from the beginning; they just survived until the end and received the title of heroes.”

“…Yes.”

“Thanks to that,” Maria bowed her head.

“For the past decade or so, we’ve believed the world was safe. At least we didn’t need to worry about the Demon King. Because we had heroes by our side.

But even that comfort was fake… What’s the meaning of all this? All these lies and… fabricated hope and… cheap comfort and… everything.”

At the end of her words, she looked up at the sky as if dejected. Like a thirsty person lifting their head to drink falling raindrops.

“Not yet.”

Kain raised his head. He knocked his heels together to shake off the mud. Maria and Lily looked at Kain.

“I don’t think it’s over yet. There’s still a lot to see, a lot we don’t know. There are still things we need to learn. Impressions can change anytime.”

“Kain. We might see something even more terrible.”

“Maybe we’ll see the bottom. That this is it. No more ambiguity, no more vagueness, nothing can get worse.”

“What meaning does that have?”

Maria looked at Kain with sad eyes. Lily seemed too distressed to speak and linked her arm with Kain’s.

Kain felt a sense of déjà vu.

Meaning.

Once, being an agent of the Security Bureau felt natural, and serving the Empire brought joy. And those good times disappeared with Beatrice’s death.

Whether she died or not, whether Kain killed her or not, the Empire awarded him a medal and promoted him. Because the chaos that followed benefited the Empire.

He lost his way and wandered aimlessly. He continued making frivolous jokes, but his inner self grew emptier. After realizing that the Empire he had tried so hard to protect was rotting from within, he became sick of it all.

There was no meaning.

The reason he accepted this mission as his last was because he needed closure. What meaning did all these things have? How should he accept what he had lived through, what he had seen and heard, and those cold and painful days he had to endure?

‘I.’

Kain clenched his fist. He looked at Maria’s hand that had sparked flames. He felt Lily leaning against him. The weight of the imperial sword and staff at his waist, the sky that was about to dim again. The calluses and scars on his right hand from grasping rose vines. The weight of the mud still on his shoes.

All those things had called Kain here. All those events still placed him on this earth. Running, walking, crawling, lying down. Crying, laughing, laughing while being angry.

Nothing had not flowed away, and nothing had not returned. Nothing would not be welcomed again, and nothing would not be sent away again.

There was nothing to hold onto. Nothing left behind. Leaving and returning, returning and leaving again. When he returned to Venelucia and left again.

When he met Lily again after parting. When he saw Elisabet and Maria, who were closer than anyone else yet hated and longed for each other while searching for one another, he knew.

There is no meaning anywhere. But anything can become meaningful. Because meaning is something people determine for themselves.

“It can be a starting point.”

Kain answered.

“When you hit bottom, there’s nothing more to get worse, nothing more to collapse, nothing more to scatter. That’s why it’s the bottom. Because nothing changes for the worse. So… if you get up from there, you can gain more than you have now.”

“I hate to be a downer, but some people never get up. You know that, right?”

“Then give them a hand at that time.”

Lily showed a light smile, while Maria displayed an incredulous expression.

“I will always be with you,” Lily whispered.

“You’re not asking me to hold your hand, but asking me to hold yours? You’re really shameless. Geez.”

Maria grumbled. With a slight bounce, Kain started walking again. His steps were a bit lighter than before. With the precious meanings he had newly found, he hastened his steps toward the fall.

* * * * *

Müller’s father-in-law, the former village chief, blinked his eyes. It seemed his hangover hadn’t cleared yet. On top of that, he was now suffering from a headache.

“…You’re a knight of the White Blood Knights?”

“That’s right,” Kain answered brazenly. Of course, as evidence, he showed the scabbard emblazoned with the order’s emblem. He had borrowed it from Lily.

“What brings you here?”

“It’s about the seed Laios. As you know, the White Blood Knights gather talented individuals from all over the Empire. But death comes to everyone equally.

Sometimes people lose their lives due to absurd mistakes during training, and sometimes they meet honorable deaths on the battlefield. But those left behind need something to remember them by.

Therefore, all those who join the order are required to list their hometown and the person who will inherit their belongings. That way, we can at least pass on their possessions.”

“But Laios left on his own…”

The village chief was flustered. He was even more flustered when he saw what Kain casually tossed. It was a pouch filled with imperial marks. It was one of the things Maria had bought at the market she visited before going to Berta Village, thinking it was pretty.

“In such cases, they are supposed to take all their belongings with them. The same goes for their money. But there was a slight accounting error.”

Life returned to the former village chief’s eyes. But as he unconsciously reached out his hand, Kain quickly picked up the pouch.

“This money was originally supposed to be given to Laios himself. But it seems he’s not in this village. You were the village chief at that time, weren’t you? Can you tell me exactly what happened to him?”