Ch.209A World Where Everyone Is Unhappy (4)

Sylvia watched as Ash slowly closed his parted lips.

What expression might he be making?

Though desperately curious, Sylvia lacked the courage to look at his face and slowly lowered her head.

It was laughably ironic.

Hero Sylvia, who could dismiss even the Demon Lord’s terrifying aura—the kind that injected fear directly into the human brain—with just a steadying breath, now couldn’t move an inch before this skinny young man.

But she couldn’t help it.

For Sylvia, this moment was the most frightening time she had ever faced in her life.

“Ugh…”

Looking back, Sylvia had always been skilled at ignoring fear.

When her comrades died, she was certainly afraid, but she endured because she had a goal to push toward.

When she realized she would have to live alone in the forest for an eternity, despair outweighed her fear.

Countless other crises and dangers had targeted Sylvia, but she had never succumbed to terror.

The common thread in all those cases was that she could somewhat predict what would happen next.

Sylvia, incredibly strong as she was, could suppress fear simply by being able to anticipate what was coming.

If she could anticipate, she could form a plan, and with Sylvia’s strength, those plans generally worked.

And if they didn’t work, she could simply give up and despair, accepting it as an unavoidable fate.

Fear had always been a distant concept for Sylvia.

‘Ash…’

But such experienced composure repeatedly failed to work in Ash’s presence.

When he first appeared before her, she feared he would see her face.

Later, she feared he would leave.

She was terrified he might die when facing the Demon Lord.

And now, she feared he wouldn’t forgive her.

“…”

Five seconds.

No, maybe ten seconds had passed.

In truth, to Sylvia it felt like more than a minute.

Ash still kept his mouth shut.

Perhaps not even a second had passed.

Trembling with fear so intense it made the floor seem to sway, Sylvia bowed her head even lower, unable to bear this terrible silence.

I shouldn’t have said anything.

That regret crossed her mind countless times.

In truth, Sylvia wasn’t virtuous enough to feel guilty about causing those people’s deaths.

She was confident she wouldn’t feel any pangs of conscience if she kept this fact hidden forever, as long as Ash stayed by her side.

But Ash’s innocent question from earlier had penetrated a corner of Sylvia’s heart, protected by a hard shell, like a dagger gently slipping between her ribs.

Why are you so anxious?

Don’t you know that I love you?

That was the meaning implied in Ash’s question.

Of course, Sylvia knew.

She knew Ash loved her.

She was well aware that no matter how many times Alice or Pia kissed him, his heart was directed toward her.

She was too sensitive to everything about Ash not to know.

But at this moment, Sylvia suddenly realized that Ash’s love for her was built upon a lie.

‘Ash, why does Ash love me?’

Sylvia knew the reason.

But did Ash know?

The catalyst that made him depend on her, that made him love her instead of someone else.

It was the murder Ash committed under the curse.

And the one who watched it happen from behind was none other than Sylvia.

Sylvia knew all too well how much that incident had broken Ash, having witnessed it firsthand.

Already considering himself a sinner because of Laila’s death, it was clearly from that day that he began to judge his own life as worthless.

Sylvia had watched all these changes in Ash while trying to hide her sinister smile.

In reality, even when he became almost unable to leave the house, Sylvia felt sorry for him but inwardly rejoiced.

By then she had learned he was Maria’s brother, but her sense of relief that he couldn’t leave her was stronger than any guilt, so Sylvia turned away from her disgusting self and consumed all the happiness and pleasure Ash provided.

That happiness and pleasure were like a drug—the more she received, the more her heart swelled, and the more she consumed, the more she wanted.

No matter how much she craved or obtained, it was never enough.

But amazingly, Ash gave Sylvia exactly as much happiness as she wanted, whenever she wanted it.

Even that wasn’t enough for Sylvia, but it wasn’t so insufficient that she couldn’t be satisfied.

Ash was slowly but surely filling in all the gaps of loss that Sylvia had felt throughout her life.

Until he suddenly disappeared.

“… Haah…”

That day when Ash, dying from magical addiction, disappeared while Sylvia was briefly asleep.

Sylvia was gripped by a despair even greater than the day she massacred the people of Millwood Village.

Because she knew that Ash’s death, or at least his choice to quietly disappear, was the result of her own greed.

Ash had shared love with Sylvia, but paradoxically, he had come to love himself less and less.

Sylvia was deeply shocked that he had chosen to secretly leave her rather than struggle to stay with her.

Only then did Sylvia finally face what wrong she had committed.

Like Maria before him, Ash had given everything to Sylvia before departing.

“I’m sorry…”

Sylvia spoke with trembling lips that she could barely move.

Now, having miraculously met him again and even defeated the Demon Lord, the source of all nightmares, together.

Sylvia herself couldn’t understand why she was revealing this truth to Ash.

Was it because she couldn’t be proud of a love built on lies?

Was it anxiety that she could no longer hold onto him now that he was being freed from the Demon Lord’s curse?

Did she want to resolve the source of her abnormal obsession with Ash?

Was she curious whether this lovable partner would still love her after knowing all this?

Perhaps it was because seeing him dying from magical energy again reminded her of the moment he silently left, filling her with sudden fear.

But whatever the cause, Sylvia was regretting her impulsive confession.

“I’m really… sorry… I was wrong…”

“… Sylvia.”

At the sound of Ash’s voice finally emerging, Sylvia immediately closed her mouth.

Simultaneously, her head bowed even lower toward the ground.

The rough wooden floor of the poorly finished cabin scraped her forehead, drawing blood.

Yet Sylvia remained motionless, her head still pressed down.

At that moment, a rustling sound reached Sylvia’s ears.

Ash was approaching her.

Would he curse at her? Or slap her face?

Or would he pick up the sword thrown on the floor to stab her?

As these terrifying thoughts tormented Sylvia’s mind,

Ash’s palm gently rested on her head, which felt ready to burst from complexity.

“… It must have been hard.”

“… Huh?”

“You thought that I love you because I was deceived… That’s what you thought. That’s why you were so anxious.”

“… Ah, aah…”

Sylvia slowly raised her head.

No, Ash was slowly lifting her head.

Ash raised Sylvia’s face with a gentle touch.

Their still-red eyes, though much lighter than before, hazily reflected each other’s images.

Large teardrops rolled down from Sylvia’s eyes.

It was because she could read no anger in Ash’s expression reflected in her tear-filled eyes.

“…”

Ash said nothing.

More accurately, he couldn’t say anything.

While he did feel a great sense of betrayal at the shocking truth that was too much to simply dismiss with “it’s okay,”

It was true that the horrible murders that day had greatly distorted Ash’s values.

Those people died because of me.

That’s what Ash had thought.

He had tried to blame it on fate twisted by the Demon Lord, but he couldn’t do that after learning the dead were Alice’s subordinates who had come looking for him.

The fact remained unchanged that they came to the forest because of Ash, and Ash himself killed them.

Perhaps Ash’s reckless self-sacrifice in the battle against the Demon Lord partly stemmed from his desire to atone for them and for Laila.

Therefore, Ash couldn’t bring himself to say he forgave Sylvia or that everything was okay.

“… Ha, I must be crazy too.”

But he hadn’t come to love Sylvia because of that incident.

Ash falling in love with Sylvia was clearly a different story.

As they looked into each other’s faces now, Ash pondered deeply.

Sylvia’s face was stained with tears and blood, her expression distorted by fear and guilt.

No longer proud or beautiful, it was a face that looked almost pitiful.

Yet, why did even this appearance seem so lovable to him?

“… Ha,”

Ash let out a hollow laugh.

He tried to say something, but finding it difficult to speak any words, his lips merely twitched.

As Ash’s lips moved without breaking the silence, Sylvia’s expression fluctuated in real-time between hope and despair.

Seeing her foolish appearance, Ash could no longer even be angry.

He simply placed both hands on her shoulders, gently embracing her neck.

“Waaah,”

Sylvia cried like a child.

Only now did Ash realize.

The reason he fell for Sylvia wasn’t because she was a strong person he could depend on.

It was because of the pitiful way she had to helplessly accept pain despite possessing such formidable strength, and the noble way she accepted her fate without trying to escape it, even while suffering.

Although she had essentially trapped Ash’s ankle and dragged him into her fate, the truth was that Ash had already half-stepped into her destiny because he couldn’t bear to see Sylvia grieving alone.

Ash gently patted Sylvia’s head as she buried her face in his shoulder, sobbing.

Then Sylvia asked in a tear-filled voice.

“Why…”

“…”

“Why, uugh… why are you forgiving me?”

“Do you need a reason?”

Sylvia shook her head vigorously.

Then, startled, she quickly nodded instead.

“Because… I, to Ash…”

It seemed she felt guilty about receiving Ash’s forgiveness without any reason.

In truth, the fact that she, who feared nothing in the world, was showing such remorse made Ash unwilling to scold her further.

But since Sylvia wanted a reason, Ash carefully chose his words from those rolling around in his mouth and mind.

“Yes, Sylvia, you deceived me.”

“…”

Sylvia flinched noticeably.

“You deceived me and betrayed me. You made me commit the most horrible act with my own hands. You despicably manipulated me when I was weak to seek comfort in your arms.”

Such scathing words.

With each word Ash uttered, Sylvia’s body jerked violently.

Sylvia clung desperately to Ash’s back, as if this might be the last embrace of her life.

Her appearance was so lovable that Ash almost burst into laughter.

“But what can I do about loving you?”

“… What?”

“Why? Did you think I wouldn’t love you because of that?”

Sylvia slowly separated from Ash and looked at his face.

Ash pretended to look angry, but his eyes were full of love.

Sylvia buried her head in Ash’s chest and wept.

Ash embraced her exposed white back and said:

“Yes, I know. I think I’m crazy too. Honestly, I still feel betrayed, but what can I do? Even your tear and snot-covered face looks beautiful to me.”

“… Uugh,”

“I’m disappointed. But I still love you.”

“Ash…”

“Well, I guess that’s how all couples live, isn’t it?”

Sylvia hugged Ash tightly.

Then she gently laid him back down on the blanket and slowly lay beside him.

“Ash…”

“Yes.”

“Can I live with you?”

“Yes.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“As much as you want.”

“What about sex?”

“You can, but not right now,”

“Can I… love you?”

“…”

Ash briefly kissed Sylvia’s lips and smiled slightly.

“Love me.”

Sylvia immediately kissed Ash’s mouth, neck, and chest in succession.

No, it was closer to licking than kissing.

Sylvia’s lips, exhaling hot breath as they traveled all over Ash’s body, slowly moved toward his groin.

Ash grabbed her shoulders and said:

“Wait, wait, what are you doing?”

“… I’ll suck you.”

“Regardless of loving you, I really can’t do it right now.”

Sylvia shook her head.

“You don’t have to do anything. You don’t have to have sex with me. It’s okay if you don’t get hard.”

“… What?”

“As a sign of remorse… no, that’s not it. Because I’m grateful, because I love you… I want to express this feeling somehow… so I’ll make you feel good. Don’t worry. I’ll satisfy myself by rubbing alone. I’ll just service you to make you feel good.”

“… You don’t have to do that.”

Sylvia shook her head again.

“I just want to make Ash feel good. I’ll work hard, and Ash can feel good alone. I’m dying to suck your cock right now.”

“What are you… wait… ack, ugh!”

Sylvia took Ash’s soft member fully into her mouth.

.