Ch.1Chapter 1. Discomfort (1)

I felt very uncomfortable.

Why? Because right in front of me, I could see quite a few students tightly embracing each other, practically on the verge of smooching.

If they’re students, they should act like students and focus on studying. Why are they already dating?

Ah, is that too much of an old-fashioned perspective?

“Jieun, Jieun.”

“What?”

“Are you jealous?”

“…”

“You are jealous, aren’t you?”

“…”

As my childhood friend from this world poked my side teasingly, I seriously contemplated what I should say to her.

I hate couples. I’ve hated them intensely since I was young.

The reason is simple.

I wasn’t part of a couple.

Isn’t that right? To be completely honest, a relationship where just having someone beside you makes you happy was something I could barely imagine.

You might ask, “What about relationships other than romantic ones?” Well, unfortunately, I’ve hardly experienced those either.

I didn’t have a particularly good personality, nor was I handsome, talented, or wealthy.

“If you’re that jealous, why didn’t you accept when someone confessed to you last time?”

“…That was just because they couldn’t confess to you, so they came to me instead.”

“Where on earth did you get that idea?”

“You know, that thing where if a really pretty girl and a less pretty girl are together, guys think they might have a chance with the less pretty one.”

“How can you joke like that?”

I’m not joking, though.

“Even so, someone like you should be able to get a boyfriend, right? If you confessed, I’m sure someone would accept.”

That’s easy for you to say.

…Well, objectively speaking, I think it would be ‘possible.’ I can’t deny there’s some subjectivity in my judgment, but I’m confident my face isn’t the type that would be rejected outright.

The problem is, even so, I can’t just date anyone right now.

I have no time, no money, a mountain of things to do, and on top of that, I like women.

Yes. I like women.

And right now, I am a woman.

You might ask what’s wrong with a woman liking women in today’s world, but that’s just something other people who aren’t in my situation would say.

Above all, my current situation is extremely ‘special.’

Date a high school student? As bad as my personality might be and as lacking in conscience as I might be, I’m not that lacking. Sure, I’m technically a high school student right now, but that’s different. A relationship between a 25+16-year-old and a 16-year-old would be enough to cause social controversy. For reference, both ages are in full years.

You might think my way of counting age is strange. And you might think I’m crazy for even considering dating a high school student at that advanced age.

There’s a story behind this.

Hmm, where should I begin?

It’s all a bit hazy since it happened 17 years ago. My memory gets a bit confused if I don’t read what I wrote in my notes.

So…

Right, I was an ordinary college student.

I attended some nameless university just outside the Gyeonggi-do area, where they couldn’t even fill 100% of their freshman quota. The school had five buildings in total, and one of them—the oldest and most unremarkable—was the dormitory.

Even at a school that couldn’t fill its student quota, dormitory rooms were always in short supply. The school had no intention of increasing their number.

Some of the bathrooms in the classrooms even still had squat toilets.

Despite being in such a neighborhood, the prices of nearby studio apartments for students were quite high. Both my parents and I decided that rather than renting nearby, I’d just commute. So I spent an hour and a half to two hours each way on the school shuttle bus.

Ah, yes. That’s how it was. After being discharged from the military, I commuted like that for over a year. Looking back now, I don’t know what I was thinking.

Anyway, well.

On the shaky bus, I naturally had quite a bit of time to spare, and during that time, if I didn’t have assignments to do, I would either sleep or find something else to pass the time.

I mostly read webtoons or web novels.

Not because I had hipster tendencies… actually, I was an otaku to the bone. I would read Japanese web novels using the browser’s built-in translator, or basically any stories that had ‘that kind of feel’ to them. You know, the kind of stories that might become popular anime in Japan.

For webtoons too, I mostly read ones posted by individuals on blogs or other community sites rather than officially serialized ones.

Most of them would either stop updating in the middle without any reason, or updates would come once a year, or they’d get officially serialized and the original series would be discontinued.

And what I hated most was that last one—’official serialization.’

Why?

Isn’t it good when a comic by an artist you like gets officially serialized? It gets updated regularly, the artist benefits, it usually gets colored, and the rough lines get refined.

The problem is, that ‘raw’ flavor disappears.

Comics posted on blogs or sites often start as one-shots. And usually, these one-shots include provocative content to attract attention.

Characters might be undressed, have large breasts, or every line of dialogue might be incredibly suggestive—all these features combine to make the comics extremely funny.

But the problem with such provocative material is that it’s difficult to sustain a long storyline.

Let me give an example.

Say there’s a traditional magical girl cliché. The magical girl transforms, and after transforming, she strikes her signature pose without anyone telling her to. The battle between the magical girl and the villain is somehow disconnected from reality so other people don’t really notice, and any real-world problems that intrude are usually limited to fights between friends or romance stories.

Now imagine a comic that twists these clichés.

The magical girl is embarrassed about her transformation, she’s so grounded in reality that she prefers hand-to-hand combat over magic, villains attack while she’s in the middle of transforming, their battles make the news, there’s an agency managing magical girls, civil servants struggle, people protest…

All of this can be made funny as satire.

But all these ‘realistic’ settings eventually lead the story in a serious direction.

That’s the trap.

Comedy novels that become long-running webtoons eventually incorporate strangely serious content, and in the end, the comedy is no longer comedy.

The ‘magical girl’ series I was reading was like that too.

“Hey, hey.”

“Hmm?”

This pink-haired girl tapping my arm.

She somehow became my childhood friend in this world.

How many high school students would have such perfectly pink hair unless they were idols who needed to have that kind of hair?

Plus, she’s had this hair color since we first met in elementary school.

She claims it’s her ‘natural color.’

…Well, let’s say that’s possible.

Let’s say there’s some incredibly unusual genetic trait in the world that could make someone like that.

But then there’s also that purple bob haircut passing by in the distance.

Or that green ponytail next to it.

Orange, lime green, blue, sky blue, navy, yellow… ah, yellow is actually a natural color, right.

Anyway, the hair colors of people passing by are quite colorful.

And in most cases, people with these intense hair colors usually had body hair of the same color. At least the eyebrows, eyelashes, and facial hair that I could see were the same color.

Just like in a manga. In this world, that was ‘normal.’

“What’s wrong? Are you sad because you don’t have anyone to spend Christmas with? Hmm? Should I keep you company?”

“…Sorry. I have prior plans that day.”

“Oh?”

My pink-haired childhood friend’s face turned slightly mischievous.

“Are you secretly dating someone behind my back?”

My goal is to get a girlfriend when I become a college student.

I never dated in college before. And then I died.

…Well, considering my current ‘special’ situation, I’m not sure if that’s possible.

“Anyway, I’m busy.”

Yes, I’m busy.

As it happens, I’m working part-time for an evil organization from a magical girl series.

Though for an evil organization job, it’s quite legal.

…Honestly, it’s amazing that the girl in front of me hasn’t noticed.

The girl in front of me is, well.

She’s “Happy Cherry Blossom,” a magical girl affiliated with the Galactic Federation. All magical girls operating in Korea are named after flowers, but she’s the only one whose name ends with “Blossom,” so everyone just calls her “Blossom.”

It’s a hilariously uncreative naming sense.

Well, one-off blog comic shorts are all like that. They probably just came up with whatever name popped into their head at the time.

The “Happy” prefix is something like the Galactic Federation’s official slogan: “Our Federation works for the happiness of all planets in the universe!” That’s also part of the webtoon’s unique black comedy.

That doesn’t mean she’s an alien though. She’s an Earthling.

…Well, I’ll get to that story gradually.

“So… here again today?”

“Yeah.”

On our way home from school.

We always parted ways at the bus stop.

She takes the bus in that direction. I walk in this direction. It’s better to save every penny I can.

Needless to say, I haven’t invited any friends to my place yet.

To be honest, there aren’t many kids who would go out of their way to talk to me unless they’re like her.

“Won’t you wait for me?”

I let out a deep sigh.

White breath poured from my mouth.

I stopped my steps and turned to face “Blossom.”

How many times have I lost fights against her?

Since my transformation gets undone when I lose, it’s remarkable that I haven’t been discovered in the past year.

Honestly, at this point, I’m developing a strange fighting spirit.

…Though it’s absurd to think that a low-level minion like me could win against the protagonist, especially one who’s practically the leader of the magical girl group.

“…Three minutes left.”

“Come on, why are you timing it like that?”

When I muttered while looking at the time displayed on the bus stop information board, Blossom waved her hand dismissively.

I let out another deep sigh.

“…You could have just gone home with your friends as usual. Why, did they all get boyfriends too?”

At my words, my childhood friend whistled and looked away.

“W-well, our relationship has been a bit distant lately. I thought it might be nice for old friends to walk home together sometimes!”

“…Is that so?”

I looked at the information board again.

“It says it’s arriving soon.”

“Oh, it really is.”

Blossom looked at the board and spoke with a hint of disappointment.

“Um… Jieun.”

Then, hesitating a bit, she addressed me.

“What.”

“Have I done anything recently that might have upset you?”

“…”

When I stared at her with my brows furrowed, expressing my confusion, she slightly lowered her head and looked up at me.

Her hands were behind her back, and she was tapping the ground with her toes.

“It’s just that you seem a bit cold lately.”

“…It’s not that.”

I let out another white breath and said.

“…I just, sigh, I don’t know. Maybe I’m feeling a bit gloomy thinking about spending Christmas the same way again.”

“Really? So it’s not my fault?”

“Did you do something wrong?”

“Well… I don’t know.”

“Then you didn’t. I don’t know either.”

When I said that, Blossom—

—no, Hayun smiled.

“Really? That’s good then.”

I wonder what exactly is good about that.

Meanwhile, the bus arrived.

“See you after Christmas then!”

I waved back at Hayun as she waved at me.

It would be nice if winter break started right after Christmas.

As I watched the bus moving away, I turned around and started walking.

…It’s cold this winter too.

I should buy more heat packs to put inside my combat uniform. Good thing I saved money on bus fare.

I thought to myself as I breathed in the cold air.