Ch.194Epilogue. I Love You (2)

When do people die?

It’s when they lose a child.

I’ve already died once.

I was struggling with all my might to end such a terrible experience with just one time.

“Is she not there?”

“No… Oh, what should we do? I think she went outside the hotel.”

“Juliane is at home. Bliss might have woken up.”

“But…”

“Go home. I’ll find Cuss and bring her back.”

“…”

I managed to calm Juliane down.

This was a problem that Cuss and I needed to resolve.

Juliane seemed to understand that, as she hesitated for a moment before nodding and turning away.

She wouldn’t have gone anywhere dangerous.

Cuss is a clever child.

I was confident that even if she ran away impulsively, she wouldn’t have gone too far.

She was just startled, afraid to face me, and her legs moved on their own.

I know because I’ve experienced it myself.

“Where could she have gone…”

Let me think about places Cuss frequently visits.

The University of Hawaii, where she’s at the top of her class despite not paying tuition and skipping across borders?

The daycare where she takes Bliss when I’m helping the old owner clean the hotel?

Or maybe the park where we occasionally go for picnics?

No. It probably wasn’t any of those places.

I don’t know why, but I just had a feeling it wasn’t.

‘This must be how Juliane felt.’

Was this the anxiety Juliane felt when she was looking for me back then?

Was she afraid I might have foolish thoughts, that I might be deeply hurt?

My pace quickened until I was half-running.

I ran along the quiet beach, and kept running.

Then, in the distance, I spotted an area full of black rocks.

A hidden fishing spot the old owner had shown me.

It was a place where Cuss and I would occasionally go fishing.

“Ugh…”

I began climbing the steep rocky hill.

I inserted my fingers into small crevices and slowly climbed up, putting weight on my feet.

Perhaps because my physical strength had declined, it became increasingly difficult to climb. Since last year, I rarely came here, and Cuss often went fishing alone.

It had essentially become Cuss’s private fishing spot—a place only she knew about and only she visited.

So if she wanted to be alone, of course she would come here.

Because it was a place where she wouldn’t be disturbed by anyone else.

“Haa…”

I finally made it to the top.

It wasn’t even that high, but I fell several times while climbing, which took quite some time.

Once I got past the steep cliff, there were no more difficult sections.

Carefully passing through the crevices between rocks, the sound of crashing waves grew louder.

At last, a flat area appeared.

“Cuss.”

“…”

And I saw a small figure crouched at the edge of the rocks.

My cute daughter with silver hair shining through the inside of her black hair.

It seemed like we needed to dye her hair again.

“Cuss.”

“…”

There was no response at all.

Even though I walked toward her making deliberate footsteps, Cuss only turned her back to me, refusing to face me.

I sat down right next to her.

And when she tried to stand up and run away, I grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back.

“Let go, Jinsoo.”

“Where are you trying to go?”

“I don’t know…”

“If you don’t know, stay here. By my side.”

“That… that seems difficult…”

Cuss whimpered.

This wasn’t like when her eyes would moisten from pain due to her tentacles being squeezed; she was welling up from deep within her heart.

I wrapped my arms around her head and let her lean on my shoulder.

Unable to hold back anymore, Cuss grabbed my collar, buried her face in my chest, and began to sob.

“Is it all, is it all true? Was this body, this test subject, once your daughter?”

“Not exactly, you’re a clone.”

“Either way, I’m genetically identical, right?”

“That’s right.”

“Then I… then I… killed your biological daughter, destroyed the brain that holds human memories and experiences, stole that body, and appeared before you? I pretended to be your stepdaughter while looking like your real daughter?”

“…”

I had nothing to say in response.

It was all true.

Her voice was drowned out by the sound of waves, crying, and sniffling, but somehow it came through clearly.

I could understand what Cuss was saying, what she wanted to say, what emotions she was feeling.

“How much… how much pain have I caused you?”

“You haven’t caused me any pain.”

“That can’t be true! Are you saying you weren’t affected at all? Seeing me with your daughter’s appearance but behaving in inhuman ways! Having me wandering before your eyes with this appearance—are you truly saying you weren’t hurt?”

“Aish! Fine! I was! I was hurt!”

I decided to be honest.

Yes, I was hurt.

I was incredibly hurt when I first found out.

It was painful every time I looked at Cuss.

I kept seeing Elizabeth’s and my face in hers.

Mari’s youthful face kept overlapping with hers.

“But what can I do? Should I abandon you? No. That would hurt even more. Much more. Because you heal me far more than you hurt me.”

If someone asked if it still hurts now, I would say yes.

I would answer that it still hurts and is painful.

But where in this world is there a perfect child without any flaws?

There’s no such 140-point daughter.

Cuss is the same.

My heart aches and throbs every time I see her, but she’s cute, pretty, lovable, and admirable.

She’s truly hateful but even more lovable—just like countless daughters all over the world.

“Don’t misunderstand. No matter who you consumed, the fact that you’re my daughter doesn’t change.”

“But, but…”

“Listen carefully. Before being an alien monster, you’re my daughter. What in this world is stronger than family? And now that blood ties have been added, shouldn’t I love you even more? No matter what anyone says, no matter what happens, you are my daughter.”

“Hic, Jinsoo…”

Cuss cried endlessly against my chest.

I couldn’t bear to see her shaking so violently, so I hugged her tightly.

So there would be no gap between Cuss and me.

I held her firmly, absorbing all of her tears.

“I’m sorry, Jinsoo. I’m really… really sorry…”

“I told you I’ve already forgiven you.”

“Then do you still love me?”

Cuss looked up at me with tears in her eyes.

Her face, trying to hold back tears, was so cute that I felt the urge to tease her, but it didn’t seem like the right timing, so I decided against it.

“I love you. Of course I love you, my daughter.”

“Jinsoo… Jinsoo…”

It was no use.

Cuss whimpered for a while before starting to cry again.

Her crying face looked so pitiful that I had to try hard not to laugh.

I embraced her head, letting her cry freely in my arms.

Today, Cuss’s body temperature felt a bit warmer than usual.

And I suddenly realized how much Cuss had grown.

Now when I hold her, she fills my arms completely.

My daughter has become a young lady.

“I love you…”

At that moment, I felt the surroundings brighten.

It was as if someone had turned on a light.

“Dad…”

A large full moon rose high in the sky.

Under its light, coral beneath the rocks emitted a blue glow.

Blue flashes rising from all directions enveloped us.

.

.

.

Trudge, trudge.

The sound of dragging feet echoed on the deck.

Sniffling and nose-blowing sounds.

And the sound of wiping eyes.

The two people walking on the quiet night deck maintained a distance that was almost touching.

Their fingers touched occasionally—tuk, tuuk.

At first it was accidental, but after that it was deliberate.

One of Cuss’s hands swung unusually wide to the side.

And whenever her pinky finger brushed against mine, she curled it slightly.

Finally, their fingers interlocked.

She wasn’t satisfied with just that.

Cuss went further and fully held my hand.

Jinsoo’s hand was large and warm.

As if it could embrace and hold anything.

She felt that sense of security.

She savored the security within the pressure, the comfort.

Even the rough calluses on his palm felt good.

“Oh? Jinsoo! Cuss!”

“Daddy and big sister!”

At the end of the deck, Juliane was waiting, holding Bliss’s hand.

Bliss yawned and rubbed her eyes before shouting loudly.

A smile had already formed on Cuss’s face.

Her adorable half-sister was someone she cherished deeply.

“Cuss, are you okay—”

“I’m fine. I heard everything. But knowing that Jinsoo has forgiven me, knowing that Jinsoo still loves me, I’m okay. Though I’m a bit upset that Juliane has been deceiving me all this time…”

“Waaah! I’m sorry! I’m sorry for deceiving you! Please don’t hate me, Cuss!”

Juliane, who had seemed so strong, suddenly collapsed and clung to Cuss’s pant leg, begging.

Even though Cuss had grown into a young lady and Juliane had given birth to a second daughter, Juliane was still afraid of being hated by Cuss.

Cuss looked at Juliane, smiled, and stroked her blonde hair.

“I don’t hate you. Because we’re family. Even if I’m upset, I don’t hate you.”

“Thank you…”

“What’s this? Why are you crying, Juliane?”

“Because… hic… Ah, I don’t know… I don’t know… It just suddenly…”

Soon Juliane also crouched down and began wiping tears with the back of her hand.

Confused by this sudden emotional change, Bliss tilted her head in bewilderment.

“Mommy crying!”

“No, no… I’m not crying because I’m sad…”

“Crying face! Ugly!”

“R-really?”

“Yes! Big sister ugly too! Snot coming out!”

“Ah…”

“Hehahaha!”

At Bliss’s observation, Jinsoo couldn’t hold back and burst into laughter.

He laughed despite the sharp glares from Juliane and Cuss.

Bliss was already getting sleepy again, nodding off, and Jinsoo quickly picked her up.

“Daughters. Shall we have a drink, the three of us?”

“Jinsoo. She’s still a child…”

“She’s already had drinks before, what’s the issue?”

“I want to drink…! I will drink!”

“Then go inside and bring out some glasses. It’s time to open that precious wine I’ve been aging for two years.”

The deck creaked once more.

The footsteps of the four people slowly headed toward the hotel room.

Along with affectionate voices.

“Damn it! It’s turned to vinegar!”

“Oh. What a waste…”

Of course, it didn’t take long for rough shouts to erupt.