Ch.193192. Graduation (1)

# 192. Graduation (1)

“Are you insane?”

Deep anger palpable even through the phone.

I’m not sure what she saw, but she was speaking as if she had clearly witnessed yesterday’s events.

“Um… did you see it?”

“How could I not have seen it?”

“I’m sorry… but this time it was actually quite safe… though you probably won’t believe me.”

In truth, my life force never dropped below single digits, and I had [Desperate Survival], so it was safe.

At least that’s what I thought.

What I thought…

“Right… of course you’d say that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize. I just called because I got upset after seeing that video.”

“I’m sorry for making you feel that way. I could have avoided it.”

“Come to think of it, why did you let him win?”

I wondered when that question would come up.

The fact that she saw a video rather than photos means she also knows I didn’t use [Transcendence] against the Abyss.

I answered with what was barely an excuse.

“If he had to face a penalty, I should too.”

“Ah… that was your only reason?”

“I’m truly sorry.”

“But that video… everyone except me seemed to think well of it.”

It seemed she wasn’t the only one who watched the video.

From what she’s saying, it sounds like everyone viewed the video positively.

Though they might have just said that in front of her.

“Who saw it?”

“Well, Riel… my parents, and a few others.”

“That’s good then.”

Those “few others” were probably people from the Orion Kingdom’s military.

Otherwise, she would have mentioned them by name.

“When I showed them the video and asked them to believe in you, they all said they understood.”

“So is that why our side is planning to attack first?”

“If the situation doesn’t change, yes.”

Not bad news.

But if someone asked whether it was good news, I wouldn’t have been able to give any answer.

‘It’s really ambiguous…’

It’s truly ambiguous, but still doable.

If we’re not foolishly charging into the Demon King’s castle to fight, it’s definitely doable.

But there’s also a sufficient possibility of losing.

“I’m really… anxious about this.”

“We can’t just sit around getting beaten, can we?”

“That’s why I’m even more anxious.”

If we don’t attack, they’ll attack us.

Either way, we have to fight.

“I feel the same…”

In truth, she must be feeling the most pressure and anxiety.

If the troops are split into two, she would become the commander of the second unit.

“Don’t feel too burdened. Try to think of it lightly. Lightly.”

“How can I think of it lightly…”

“That’s also part of your ability.”

Staying calm and commanding troops without tension in a situation where anyone would be nervous.

That’s also one of the abilities a commander must possess.

“But… it’ll be fine, probably.”

“Probably?”

“It’s not something we can easily be certain about, right? And as I said earlier, I’m a bit anxious.”

Actually, it’s not just a bit—I’m quite anxious.

I’m worried something major might happen with the main force, not our unit.

It would be fine if something happened to our unit.

After all, we have Lilith, or I could just use [Transcendence] to boost my agility and escape.

But if the main force loses, there would be no turning back.

“Or should I just join the main force instead?”

“No…! Absolutely not!”

“But with Lilith here, this side would somehow manage—”

“No… absolutely not.”

“Alright.”

She seemed just as anxious as I was.

Of course, not knowing what exactly she was anxious about, I couldn’t say anything.

“But… what if the main force loses?”

“What? Is that why Albert has been feeling anxious?”

She asked with an incredulous tone.

I could understand her feelings.

Logically speaking, she wouldn’t think the main force would lose.

And I knew it too.

That our main force wasn’t so unreliable.

But for some reason, I felt uneasy.

“Yes.”

“Why worry about that… Of course they’ll win.”

“Nothing is certain in war.”

Unless there’s an overwhelming difference in power, battles contain countless variables.

And the power difference between the two main forces isn’t large enough to ignore these variables.

“Sometimes the side expected to win loses, and the side expected to lose wins.”

“Don’t say things like that… They say words can become reality.”

“I’m just saying I have a bad feeling.”

It could simply be my mood.

That’s why I couldn’t continue speaking.

Any more would just be stubbornness. And talking about it wouldn’t change anything.

“You can just ignore what I said.”

“When you say that, it makes me think about it more…”

“I’m sorry for being so stubborn.”

“You don’t have to… go that far…”

I got up from the bed where I had been lying, my body still aching.

Then, with the phone still at my ear, I walked out of the infirmary.

“No, I’m really sorry. I should have been stubborn elsewhere…”

“I just heard a door close—don’t tell me you left the infirmary!?”

“You know me so well.”

“You’re still hurt…!”

Hearing her voice filled with concern gave me strength.

It made me want to try harder and be more stubborn.

“Don’t worry, I’m much better now.”

“Really… you’re impossible…”

“But I’ve been taking breaks as needed.”

I flung open the door to the dungeon strategy room and went inside.

As soon as I entered, Aelin recognized me and came running over.

Why is she here… just my luck.

“Hey! Are you crazy!? Why are you here in that condition!?”

“Is that Aelin? Please stop him…”

“Unni! But… I can’t control this guy, and…”

When she graduated and left the academy, Aelin used to try to stop me when I acted like this.

But after I ignored her advice and kept pushing myself, she eventually gave up.

However, today she seemed determined not to let it slide.

“Today, you really can’t.”

“Can’t you just let me through?”

“No, go back and get some rest! What do you think you can do in that condition!?”

“I’m doing this because I’m anxious… because I’m anxious…”

I’m anxious about the current situation, my abilities, and the future.

After coming this far, I didn’t want to experience those things again.

I just wanted to end it with my suffering alone.

“Can’t you just let me do this…?”

“That’s your problem.”

“Problem? What?”

“Why do you always try to suffer alone and end things by yourself? Are we just decorations?”

She wasn’t wrong.

But she wasn’t right either.

I don’t know about later, but right now, they were indeed decorations.

“…”

“If that’s how it is, why did you teach us? If you were going to do everything alone?”

“That’s because… you’re still lacking…”

“That’s why we’re all here like this, trying to exceed your expectations. Have some faith in us.”

Hearing those words, I finally remembered their existence.

Until now, I had only considered myself and her as effective forces.

‘Come to think of it… that’s true…’

If they attain a certain level of skill, I could just entrust the second unit to them.

As I mentioned earlier, we have Lilith as a reliable ally.

“Don’t you trust us? Were we such trash in your eyes?”

“That’s… not it…”

“Then have some faith in us. We’ll show you what we can do.”

It was strange to hear such words from someone who originally had no faith at all.

And I could feel that she had many complaints about me all this time.

“What if it doesn’t work? What if I leave it to you and come back to find everyone wiped out?”

“Then we’d already be dead, wouldn’t we?”

“Come to think of it… that’s true…”

“If we fail, we just die, that’s all.”

“You shouldn’t say such things so easily.”

But Aelin’s tone was far from joking.

Rather, she spoke with an utterly serious tone and voice.

“If I’m willing to say I’ll die if I fail, can’t you trust me?”

“…”

“Can’t you trust me? You’re so frustrating.”

“Fine! I get it! I’ll go back… I’ll go back…”

This time, I lost.

How could I continue being stubborn when she put it like that…

Returning to the infirmary as promised, I lay down on the bed.

Then I spoke to her, who had been chattering contentedly since earlier.

“Are you that happy about it?”

“Come to think of it, I wasn’t considering our party members.”

“Yeah…”

“You definitely have a tendency to try to handle everything by yourself, Albert.”

I thought I had gotten rid of that tendency, but apparently not.

“Is that so?”

“Yes! Now that you’ve been scolded properly, let’s move as a team in the next battle, okay?”

“We need to meet first before we can move as a team or not.”

“You’ll just need to provide support. You don’t lack anything in terms of skill or connections.”

“I wanted to get in solely based on my abilities.”

Of course, one can join the Special Forces even with slightly lacking abilities.

Like Marco or Amelia, if their future looks promising.

I also had a promising future, but I didn’t want to get in that way.

“Most people currently active in the Special Forces were about Albert’s level when they first joined. Or even weaker.”

I was a bit skeptical.

Comparing myself now to when I applied and was accepted into the Special Forces in my previous life, or to other successful applicants, I was still somewhat lacking.

“You’re not just saying that to boost my confidence, are you?”

“Of course not. Albert, just wait comfortably for graduation now. Don’t push yourself unnecessarily again.”

“You’re really good with words…”

Graduation.

Hearing that word from her lips made me truly realize that I was about to graduate.

“Graduation, huh…”