Ch.192Epilogue. Never Meant to Stay (4)

I, Kagami, and Koko were actually quite ignorant about Japanese regions.

We learned about them in school. I roughly knew where the cities were located, and though I’d forgotten most of what I learned after exams, I vaguely remembered what specialties came from where.

But theoretical knowledge usually proves useless when you actually visit a place. I had barely been anywhere in Korea outside of Seoul, let alone Japan.

I acted knowledgeable when talking to Kagami, but the truth was we were both equally clueless.

Still, since we’d come all the way to Nagoya, we should at least take some photos.

We took pictures in front of Nagoya Castle, ate tonkatsu for lunch, and departed around 1 PM.

Looking at the road map Kagami had prepared, the distance from Nagoya to Osaka was much shorter than from Tokyo to Nagoya. Based on yesterday’s experience, it would probably take two and a half to three hours.

“…driving.”

“Pardon?”

I had been sitting absentmindedly in the moving car when I suddenly said that, and Kagami responded. This time her eyes were properly focused on the road ahead.

“Your driving seems to have improved.”

Well, after driving for several hours, she was bound to get better. She had practiced diligently before and studied hard at driving school.

“You think so?”

Kagami seemed pleased by my compliment.

“Kotone.”

Koko, sitting in the back seat, suddenly held out a snack bag toward me.

Though Koko ate pretty much anything, after feeding her proper human food for a while, she had developed some preferences.

She generally liked anything people considered “delicious.” Snacks, bread, meat dishes. She enjoyed vegetables too, but if given both meat and vegetables, she’d eat the meat first. Koko didn’t seem to have the concept of “saving the best for last” yet.

With snacks too, she seemed to have preferences, choosing sweet snacks over salty ones when left to pick on her own. Texture didn’t seem to matter much to her.

Kagami had bought lots of snacks that Koko had selected. What she was offering me now was one of those.

Hmm, actually, looking at it again, it didn’t quite look like a typical snack.

I think they were sold as “snacks,” but they looked more like rice cakes.

I tried to recall what the excited shop clerk had explained when we entered—the clerk who was thrilled to see a beautiful mother with two pretty daughters. I had tuned out most of the explanation, but I did remember they were steamed.

Apparently, it was a Nagoya specialty. Like the ones Mako gave me after her trip to Sendai last summer, it seemed to be a traditional local snack.

The package containing five small square rice cake-like pieces in a row was labeled “uirou (ういろう).”

I called them rice cakes, but looking again, they also resembled yokan. Well, yokan is a type of confection too, I suppose.

“Is it good?”

“Yes!”

When I asked Koko, she answered enthusiastically. Seeing her chewing with her mouth full, I couldn’t tell how many she had stuffed in at once.

She must have given it to me because it was delicious, right? Though Koko’s taste was so broad that I couldn’t entirely trust her judgment.

I unwrapped one and put it in my mouth.

It tasted somewhat similar to yokan, as its appearance suggested. It was a bit less sweet than the factory-made yokan you’d buy at Korean supermarkets.

If I had to say whether it was tasty or not, it was on the tasty side, but like most local specialties, it wasn’t something worth making a special trip for.

After eating one, I unwrapped another. The one I had eaten contained red bean paste, but this one was black and looked even more like yokan.

“…want some?”

I showed it to Kagami as she drove.

At my words, Kagami almost turned her head sharply toward me but managed to stop at about 15 degrees. Fortunately, her eyes remained focused straight ahead. Though it made her expression look a bit funny.

Well… since Kagami was still a beginner, it might not be good to make her take her hands off the wheel.

With that thought, I brought the snack close to her mouth.

It wasn’t very big, so it fit into Kagami’s mouth in one bite. Though looking at her afterward, her cheeks were quite full.

Seeing her happily chewing the yokan-like confection with a blissful expression, she seemed extremely satisfied.

“Kotone, Kotone!”

Hearing an excited call from behind, I turned slightly.

Koko was opening her mouth toward me. It was cute, like a baby bird opening its beak.

I unwrapped another piece and put it in her mouth. Koko also chewed the snack happily with a delighted face.

This trip was really worth it.

I wiped my slightly sticky fingers on my pants, turned on the camcorder, and filmed the two still eating snacks.

Then I widened the angle as much as possible to include my face and made a V-sign with my fingers.

“…”

Not sure what to say, I thought for a moment, then:

“On our way to Osaka.”

I just mumbled that casually.

*

Kyoto City was on the way to Osaka City.

We briefly discussed it in the car and decided that rather than visiting Kyoto City first and then going to Osaka City, we would stay in Osaka and visit Kyoto from there.

We planned to stay in Osaka for two nights.

When we arrived, it was still 4 PM. After dropping our luggage at a hotel room near the beach, we hurriedly looked up famous attractions in Osaka.

We decided to visit Osaka Castle tomorrow. It was too close to closing time to go now.

Universal Studios Japan existed at this time too, but if we went there tomorrow, we wouldn’t be able to go anywhere else all day. While I didn’t mind spending a whole day at an amusement park, something felt… something felt missing, which was both my and Kagami’s conclusion.

We agreed to save the amusement park for another time, with a proper plan. After all, there’s the unique Japanese Golden Week after spring break ends, plus summer and winter vacations.

I’m not sure how hard I’ll study for entrance exams, but it shouldn’t be impossible to spare a few days during my third year breaks.

Kagami seemed to want to explore Osaka as a whole, so that’s what we decided. I wanted that too.

The first place we visited was Dotonbori.

If you live in an area, you might get tired of busy shopping districts if you go too often, but as tourists, we didn’t feel that way at all.

Even if modern buildings look similar everywhere, each place has its unique atmosphere. Even different cities within the same country.

Dotonbori was like that too.

After sunset, Dotonbori was as dazzling as any busy district.

The most eye-catching thing was the Marathon Man drawn on a huge sign. The neon lights tracing its outline were incredibly flashy.

I recognized the background. It was a spot where people who visited Japan often posted proof shots on their blogs.

Kagami seemed to know this too, as her eyes sparkled.

We all took photos there.

It was too dark for disposable cameras, so we used the camcorder and our phones. Like all digital photos taken in dark places, there was a lot of noise, but we could take better shots tomorrow during the day.

We bought takoyaki and walked around holding them, looking at everything. The people walking around spoke with unfamiliar intonations. Was this the Osaka dialect I’d heard about?

Tokyo is vast, and it would take a long time to visit all its famous streets, but just being this far away was enough to enjoy the atmosphere.

We had udon for dinner.

Udon supposedly originated in Osaka, but honestly, I couldn’t tell how different it was from udon elsewhere.

Still, it was enjoyable.

Without any worries, without any thoughts.

Walking with family too.

How long has it been?

“…”

I suddenly stopped walking.

Koko and Kagami walked a few more steps before noticing and turning toward me.

“Kotone?”

Their voices overlapped.

It’s not surprising that Koko called me by my name as she’s always done that, but thinking about it, Kagami’s way of addressing me had changed at some point.

Before, she used pronouns like “you” more often than my name, but somewhere along the way, she started calling me just by my name.

Perhaps it’s because Kagami now sees me as family. You can’t call your daughter “you” after all.

“Is something wrong?”

I wonder if someday Kagami will start speaking to me informally?

After pondering briefly, I shrugged.

Well, whether that day comes or not doesn’t really matter. If I tried to dictate how our relationship should be, it would obviously crack our family bond.

And I don’t really have a preferred way anyway.

What matters is how I change.

Will I change naturally and gradually like Kagami and Koko? Without even realizing it?

Well, I’m not sure, but I guess that doesn’t matter either.

“It’s nothing.”

When I expressed my thoughts and stepped between them, Kagami and Koko tilted their heads in confusion.

They really looked like mother and daughter.

But if I said that now, I’d definitely get pulled into a hug from Kagami, so I decided to keep quiet.

*

At the hotel, Kagami mentioned that she had read a picture book to Koko yesterday and seemed to be hinting that she wanted to read to me today, so I quickly went to take a shower. I was even the last one to shower today. Was she planning to put me to bed without washing?

…Was she that eager?

I’ve heard that there are solutions for children who grew up without feeling parental love and developed personality issues, where they go through baby and child education stages again. Kagami seemed to be instinctively applying that solution to herself.

Even though we recognize each other as family and have broken down many walls, a picture book at my age is a bit much.

If someone has to play that role, I’d prefer it to be Koko. Koko doesn’t mind and actually enjoys it.

“Phew.”

I soaked in the bathtub and dozed off a bit. The bath salts in the hotel had a nice fragrance.

After waking up from my doze, I found myself smiling without realizing it.

Both Kagami and I.

Despite knowing we have enough money to stay in hotels like this, we strangely cling to living in that house. If we wanted, we could move to a house closer to Tokyo to reduce commuting time and live closer to friends.

But somehow, I don’t want to.

It’s not that I want to be inconvenienced. It’s not that I don’t want to live near where my friends live.

It’s just that somehow, I’ve already recognized that place as home.

Over the past year, I’ve grown attached to that house and don’t want to abandon or move the many things there.

At first, it was painful because there was nothing, but someone kept trying to fill my deficiencies. All the items in the house, and the people who occasionally visit.

Someday that will all flow away too.

It might be difficult to live there forever. There might come a time when we need to move to a bigger house, or when the house needs to be demolished for various reasons.

Even this moment will eventually pass.

“…”

I can’t hold onto it.

But I want to remember everything.

“I should get out.”

After washing up and going out, Koko was again sleeping with her head on Kagami’s arm.

What the heck.

Does her voice have some sleep-inducing effect? Is she using some kind of magic?

Well, Koko does have a personality where she can sleep comfortably anywhere, but still, she seems to fall asleep too easily.

When I tried to go to the other bed, Kagami patted the space next to her, just like yesterday.

I don’t understand why she booked a room with three beds then.

Well, it was Kagami’s money, so I can’t really complain.

I went over and lay down next to Kagami.

I had been dozing off in the bathroom too. Apparently, the fatigue from driving for hours today and walking around until late had accumulated more than I thought.

“…Kotone.”

As my consciousness was slowly drifting away, Kagami suddenly spoke, making me jolt.

“Huh?”

Instead of a proper answer, a strange sound came out, but Kagami didn’t seem surprised or laugh.

She just asked in a serious voice.

“Are you enjoying yourself?”

I opened my eyes again.

Looking to the side, Kagami was looking at me.

The curtains in the room were deliberately left open, and the mood light beside the bed was on, so I could see Kagami’s face quite clearly.

Moreover, since the three of us were squeezed onto a bed meant for one person, her face was quite close.

“The trip had no plan at all.”

“Wasn’t it deliberately planned without a plan?”

I thought we were just going for a long drive.

“It was deliberate… but…”

Kagami lay back down, looking at the ceiling.

Her profile looked a bit dazed.

Kagami must be the most tired. She drove for so long. She drove quite a distance for two consecutive days, and immediately after driving, we walked around without resting.

“Actually, I wanted to make a more sensible plan.”

She probably didn’t know how.

Even people who grew up in normal families can be confused when making travel plans for the first time as adults.

It’s impossible to make a perfect plan when visiting a place you’ve never been to before. Even in the age of smartphones.

They tell you how many minutes it takes to get from here to there, but when you actually go, it takes longer because there are too many people, or because your walking pace is too slow or too fast.

Only after visiting several times and being confident about how to get around can you make a clean plan.

But Kagami didn’t grow up in a normal family.

So she doesn’t know that this “difficulty” is something everyone experiences. It’s similar to how dual-income parents who are often away from home try harder to make sure their children eat properly.

“It’s your first time.”

So I said simply.

“It’s my first time too, and Koko’s first time.”

Strictly speaking, I had been on a school trip, but I decided not to mention that here.

“Can’t we do better next time?”

When I asked that, Kagami was silent for a moment before finally speaking.

“You’re right. Next time…”

Kagami spoke with a voice tinged with lingering emotion.

“Yes, next time.”

And I felt I should add one more thing.

“And it’s plenty of fun right now. Like I said earlier, it’s our first time anyway.”

First times are always fun. Just exploring a street you’ve never been to before can take up all your time. Didn’t we just experience that?

“…I see.”

Only then did Kagami exhale a long breath, as if finally reassured.

*

The next day.

In the morning, we went to the aquarium to see fish.

For some reason, Koko drooled a little watching the fish swimming freely in the water. Did she think of them as food?

Fortunately, thanks to our thorough education that she shouldn’t eat cat food, she didn’t try to hunt the fish on the spot.

For lunch, we grilled meat, and in the afternoon, we visited Osaka Castle.

It was larger than I expected. The place called Tenshukaku seemed more modern inside than I had anticipated, perhaps because it had been rebuilt in later years.

Well, I didn’t come to learn about its historical significance anyway.

Koko’s eyes sparkled throughout. Kagami was trying not to show it outwardly, but honestly, I could see her eyes sparkling a bit too.

And my eyes probably sparkled as well. Honestly, I felt half like I was on an overseas trip.

I had never felt this relaxed even when hanging out with friends, but thinking about it, I had too many things to worry about back then.

This was truly a carefree vacation after clearing away everything.

“I know what I want to eat!”

“Then let’s go get that!”

When Koko suddenly mentioned something she wanted to eat, Kagami responded.

Seeing this, I almost burst out laughing, but I bit my lip hard to hold it in and walked beside the two.

Our footsteps sounded cheerful as the three of us walked under the clear sky.