Ch.175175. My Sword, My Hero (3)

Beings of the material world are not created beings. Whether human, animal, or magical beast. True creation and creatures never existed. They were byproducts of the activities of transcendent beings that existed at the beginning. They fought in emptiness, having lost even the reason for fighting, repeatedly winning and losing. It was closer to a phenomenon than a conflict, and their discord was their nature and immutable quality.

And when the evil gods reached into the world of matter, I was created.

The light created me and didn’t even give me a name.

When I opened my eyes, darkness was spread everywhere, and the ground I stood on was as black and bleak as the sky. No, I’m not even sure if the distinction between sky and earth had any meaning. That’s what the night of myth was like. Unstable beings breathed with fear and closed their eyes to escape from gazes.

I must protect them. I muttered as I grasped the sword stuck beside me. The feeling of knowing what I was and what I should do from the moment of creation wasn’t exactly pleasant. The darkness began to reveal their hostility without hiding it the moment they detected my existence.

“Please save us.”

And that was pain for those I had to protect. Shadows began to pour down from the sky, and magical beasts began to attack people indiscriminately. Pain to escape from oppression and fear. There were those who welcomed my existence, and those who denied and despised it.

“In the end, you must bear it.”

It was on a day when sporadic battles continued. Wise humans called me and said so. I must bear it. I must become the spark, the light, the torch, unite people, and fight against the shadows.

“You must make this fight not your fight, but our fight.”

“…I understand.”

I raised my sword.

I wore a pure white armor.

On my head, I wore a crown woven from thorny vines, containing my sins and responsibilities.

When I raised the sword, a white light so bright it hurt the eyes poured out. It was a pure light unmixed with any impurity. People gathered as if enchanted by the light. I thought it was unsettling. Like moths drawn to a bonfire, people were blind to the light on my sword.

“Go forth. Go forth and liberate this world.”

I followed those words. People called me a hero.

In fact, the memories of myth are quite faint. Perhaps there was no time for memories to form as I swung my sword. My body, molded by god, did not break no matter how much I fought. It didn’t even get wounded. I didn’t get tired because mind and emotions didn’t exist in the first place.

[Struggling to the end…]

When I regained consciousness, it was at the edge of the world.

I was standing alone against the evil gods, pointing my sword. On the ground, the corpses of humans who had come this far with me were scattered in terrible states. My breath remained steady. If I could just hold on a little longer, the sealing ritual would begin and imprison the evil gods in emptiness.

[Do you think we will just retreat like this-!]

The evil gods, filled with evil and unable to overcome their hatred, shouted. Shadows overflowed. I tried to block the leaking shadows by swinging my sword, but the evil gods’ final struggle with their existence at stake was something even I couldn’t stop.

[Humans will suffer forever. They will remember my traces and live recalling this moment. And our remnants will someday come to awaken us again…!]

The shadows seeped into the world. Changing forms into snakes, hundreds of millions of locusts, giant tentacled monsters. But I couldn’t leave my position to stop them. I had to focus all my strength on sealing the evil gods. The sealing formation began to work. I thrust my sword into the ground and accelerated the sealing. As the shadows gradually faded, the sky began to appear.

[…I curse this world… humans… hero, you…]

With those words, the evil god disappeared into the void.

And the seal was much more unstable than I had thought. The anger of the evil gods could be felt even from beyond the emptiness completely isolated from this world, and the space was twitching as if it might tear at any moment. And I realized what I had to do next.

“…Farewell.”

There was no welcome or suspicion from people. I approached the distorting space and reached out my hand. As if it had been waiting, the space began to suck me in. I was slowly absorbed into the space without anyone to record my final moments.

The sword thrust into the ground. The crown fallen on the floor. And the armor.

Those three are all I leave in this world.

I felt empty. That was the first emotion I felt since coming to this world. I observed my existence disappearing without feeling the result of the battle or how people lived afterward. There was no time to mourn the fallen. The moment I realized this, emotions flooded into my mind as if a dam had burst.

I remembered the child who gave me flowers. I recalled the person who served me food. Those who cheered for me loudly on the streets, those who went through life-and-death battles with me.

In truth, I wanted to stay in this world a little longer.

In truth, the world and people were starting to get a little better.

It was too late for regrets. I let go of my last attachment at my fingertips and allowed the space to devour me. I felt the distant hatred of the evil gods. I took up the sword that appeared in my hand again and faced the evil god.

[You!!]

The evil god’s cry. I faced that cry head-on and swung down my sword.

==

Even in emptiness, time flowed. The evil gods observed everything happening in the world through the shaking space. With each event, the evil gods mocked me.

[Can you feel it? My first child has awakened.]

The evil god boasted about how the “snake” killed people, how many people it killed, and how many people were sacrificed to kill the snake.

I fight. It doesn’t matter. I swung my sword. Cursing my conscious self, I moved my tireless body. As long as I am confined here, they are also trapped together. I comforted myself with that thought.

After eons passed again, the second calamity awakened. This time, I could feel its existence too. The seal was weakening as the world remembered the existence of the evil gods.

Despite feeling a sense of crisis, there was a part of me that was happy to be able to perceive the existence of the world. I came to hate myself even more. I raise my sword again and swing it. I face the infinite shadows.

[This seal cannot hold us forever.]

When the third calamity awakens, the myth will repeat.

The evil god said so and laughed. That cannot be. I must not return to that world again, and the evil gods must not show themselves in the world again.

[What will you do? This door will inevitably open, and both you and we will be released. Without you among humans, fear will continuously spring forth, and the voices calling us will grow stronger.]

What, will you do.

I could answer that question. If I am not there, I can send down someone to take my place. If I leave someone to protect this world that I truly loved.

The world still faintly connected. I extended my power toward my remnants. Just as I was created from light, those remnants were also beings created from light. They are no different from fragments of myself.

The light responded. The remnants gathered together, leaving only shells. The light gathered and formed a shape of its own, beyond my will. My love for the world, my thoughts of wanting to protect people, were concentrated in that light and began to emit a new radiance. It was a softly shining golden light, different from the pure white light I possessed.

“…Ah.”

The light recognized me as soon as it took form. A being both the same as me and completely different. I implanted false memories in him and pondered a name.

“…Ilroy.”

Yes, you are my light. The one who shines light. I named him so.

“Who are you…?”

Ilroy, having gained self-awareness, asked me. Then I realized that I had never had a real name, only being called by the title “hero.”

“Isha.”

Remembering how a child once awkwardly pronounced “hero,” I said that. It would be a name erased from memory anyway. Ilroy smiled as if pleased.

“Ilroy, I will erase your memories. And you will move according to the behavioral principles I input, trying to save the world and people.”

“Yes. I know.”

“You may hate me. You may resent me. Creating you was my stubbornness and greed.”

“If I can save so many people and only receive the resentment of one person, that’s a good deal.”

Ilroy said with a playful smile.

“Fine. I’ll resent you. I’ll resent you for creating me like this and then fighting alone against destruction in such a desolate universe.”

Ilroy said so while looking straight into my eyes. This child, designed to love the world, was born unable to properly hate me.

“And I’ll resent the fact that no one knows you’re fighting such a lonely battle. Then surely I will resent myself too. Saying, did you forget? Have you been living normally, forgetting the one who made you exist?”

I was probably crying then. My memory is hazy, so I’m not sure. I only remember Ilroy caressing me through our connection. I can only infer from that memory. Because his hand was so warm. Because it seemed to remind me of what I had forgotten during the eons I had spent here.

“As long as you continue to fight here, I will continue to resent. I will resent the one who created a void in my memories, the one who made me fight. Even if I forget my memories, Isha, I will remember your existence like this.”

I cried. That’s for certain. I was crying then. I was crying so bitterly. Regardless of evil gods or destruction or whatever, I poured out all the emotions I had while crying. The light born from my remnants, where I had kindled the spark, was so warm.

“Your personality will be a bit twisted.”

“That’s fine. Existence is originally twisted. Nothing is perfect. It is existence because there is some distortion somewhere, some imperfect corner.”

“You have sufficient quality but may lack power.”

“I will try to overcome it. If power is lacking, I will definitely try to build it up as much as it’s lacking.”

Saying that, it really meant I was dropping Ilroy into this world without any preparation. All I could give was talent, mindset, and an unbreakable will. This makes me no different from the absolute being who created me.

“I’m sorry.”

I said as I stroked Ilroy’s cheek. Tears flowed endlessly. Ilroy smiled.

“Creating me is not something to apologize for.”

“Abandoning you is something to apologize for.”

“Perhaps. But…”

The time to part was approaching. Ilroy, growing distant, smiled until the end and said to me.

“I’ll hear those words when I come back to find you.”

==

Again, eons passed.

I fought, and Ilroy fought too. But Ilroy’s fight was short. The potential I had planted did not properly bloom with the void in his memory. Humans tried to face the evil gods with the one among them who had the most potential, but the method was wrong.

The evil god was released, and humans fought to the end but were defeated.

The world was thus once swallowed by darkness, and I too was swallowed by darkness in my fading consciousness.

And the world returned to its starting point.

Whether it was light’s scheme or simply the natural order, I couldn’t tell. But I was revived with all my previous memories intact, and I repeated the time until I created Ilroy again.

It was painful. I hesitated.

I didn’t know if creating Ilroy was the right thing to do, or if abandoning him as he was would be right even if I created him. I repeated my mistakes and created Ilroy again. And I implanted memories in his mind. So that even if he couldn’t remember me, he wouldn’t harbor empty hatred. So that he could save this world.

And I separated my consciousness and placed it in the sword.

So that I could watch over him this time. So that I could open the path for him to grow. And so that this time, he could be loved by the world as much as he loved it.

…I was right. I think that was really a good choice.

The darkness was deep. I am still cutting down the shadows of the evil gods. My situation hasn’t changed. However, I was able to save people and Ilroy. That fact sustained me. It gave me strength to sustain myself and continue to face that darkness.

I am… fine.

“Really… I’m fine.”

I should have just watched. I shouldn’t have talked to Ilroy. I shouldn’t have appeared. Then I wouldn’t have recalled this longing, this sadness, this joy. That brief happiness both sustained me and broke me down. Thus I staggered, broke down alone, recovered again, and swung my sword.

“I’m fine.”

Really?

Thud.

My legs gave out. It’s okay. I can get up again. I thrust my sword into the ground and exerted force. Strength wouldn’t enter my body. I struggled in confusion at this phenomenon I was experiencing for the first time.

Am I broken? Now of all times?

I looked at the darkness approaching hopelessly. I should be able to stand up, but I can’t. My body was refusing to stand. I must endure. I couldn’t pass this despair on to them. For Ilroy to live happily, I must stand up.

“No… way.”

This is the end.

I can no longer endure. Why was I created as such an imperfect being? When I can’t protect anything and will vanish like this. When I will let even what’s most precious to me disappear into ashes along with me.

“I’m sorry.”

I whispered quietly.

“Well now. I told you to apologize when I came back to find you.”

…Huh?

A strong hand was felt on my back. The hand lifted me up. My body was supported by someone’s body.

“Were you going to leave after apologizing alone like that?”

I turned my head. Teal eyes were looking at me, smiling.

“Look at this. Crying again.”

“Wh…what?”

It was a voice I remembered. Warm, playful yet reliable, and kind.

“Isha.”

Ilroy embraced me like that and called my name.