Ch.160Heart (2)

*

Though the tall trees blocked most of the sunlight, Alice still opened her eyes as soon as morning came, like a precisely calibrated clock.

As if someone had shaken her awake, Alice’s eyes flew open and she bolted upright, her face drenched in cold sweat.

Alice held her breath and slowly looked around.

Grass, trees, stones, dirt.

And, Ash.

As her slowly rotating gaze finally settled on Ash’s peacefully sleeping figure, Alice exhaled deeply and began to breathe normally again.

“…Hah.”

“Still alive and well for another day, I see.”

At that moment, a sharp voice struck Alice’s ears.

She reflexively turned her head toward the sound.

High up on a branch above the tree trunk where Ash was sleeping.

Sylvia was sitting there, perched on the branch.

“Anyone watching would think you were lying about dying soon.”

“…Phew.”

Alice wiped away her cold sweat with the back of her hand and said,

“You sound disappointed that I’m still alive.”

“Fortunately, your heart condition hasn’t affected your hearing.”

“While your curse seems to have caused significant problems with your personality.”

“Haha, look at you.”

Though they exchanged harsh words immediately upon waking, neither Alice nor Sylvia seemed particularly bothered.

Neither of them had enough tenderness left to be hurt by a few sharp words, nor did they have any desire to suddenly become close friends at this point.

Alice quietly clenched her teeth and grabbed her clothing that was stuck to her skin, lifting it up.

With a chilling ripping sound, the flesh between her collarbone and chest came away.

Before a groan could escape through her gritted teeth, the torn skin began to heal.

“That looks painful to watch. Why don’t you just take it off normally?”

“Since when did you care about my pain?”

“I’m not worried about you hurting—it’s just disgusting to watch.”

Alice let out a hollow laugh at Sylvia’s curt response.

“Now you’re pretending to be delicate, when you’re the one who minced me like meat.”

“…”

Sylvia, who had been spitting out spiteful words, suddenly fell silent.

While the incident where Sylvia had brutally trampled Alice was certainly a traumatic experience for Alice, it was also somewhat uncomfortable for Sylvia to recall.

It was because Ash had directly demanded that Sylvia “apologize to Alice noona,” and even bowed his head alongside her. Because of this, Sylvia tried to avoid mentioning the incident as much as possible.

If Sylvia were to bring up that day and provoke Alice, Ash would clearly dislike it. Since Sylvia would do anything for Ash, she chose to hold her tongue.

Alice slowly picked up her breastplate and covered her grotesquely distorted torso with it.

Sylvia spoke softly toward Alice.

“It’s because of Ash, isn’t it?”

“…”

“You’re embarrassed to show your bare skin because Ash is here. Hah, look who’s talking about being delicate.”

“That’s not it.”

“Not it? Ah!”

Sylvia snapped her fingers with a click and nodded.

“I see. You don’t want to show your grotesquely distorted skin.”

“…”

“It would be better if Ash were just embarrassed, but you’re afraid he might find it disgusting or frightening, and that would hurt you, right?”

“Why would I be hurt? Even I can see that a chest full of holes doesn’t look good.”

“That’s true…”

“No, besides, I already told you. I don’t have much time left…”

“Bullshit. Do you think I can’t tell? It’s written all over your face. How you feel about Ash.”

“…”

Alice pressed her lips tightly together.

Rather than responding, she busied her hands without making eye contact, as if she didn’t care what Sylvia said.

After slowly putting on her breastplate and getting up, Sylvia spoke to Alice once more.

“Be honest.”

Alice exhaled with a sigh and asked,

“…About what?”

“You deny it, you say you have no chance because you’re going to die soon, but your face is dripping with lingering attachment. Ash is too preoccupied with other things right now, otherwise he would have noticed too.”

Alice felt her heart skip a beat.

The sound was so loud that Sylvia must have heard it too.

Alice twisted her lips in displeasure.

She was sick of this old heart that was so unnecessarily honest that it couldn’t hide when a nerve was struck.

“…Hah.”

Indeed, as Sylvia said, Alice still had feelings for Ash.

No, they had actually grown stronger than before.

When she first heard about the engagement, she had simply thought, “Oh, so that’s how it turned out.”

At the time, she was busy attending the academy and working hard to join the hero’s party.

When she heard that Ash had died with his family, she was furious.

But that anger stemmed more from guilt at not being able to protect Maria’s family than from grief over losing her fiancé.

Even when she heard that Ash and Layla might still be alive, she vowed to find them for Maria’s sake.

To Alice, Ash had been nothing more than her precious friend’s younger brother, a mischievous child from her memories.

The last time she saw Ash before going to the academy, he wasn’t even a young man yet, so that was understandable.

But her feelings actually began to ignite after meeting the grown-up Ash.

Ash had matured wonderfully.

His gentle yet upright character, and his body that, despite not being athletic, had a distinctly masculine quality.

But if Ash’s charm had been merely physical, her heart wouldn’t have been drawn to him like this.

Though Ash seemed to be holding himself together well on the surface, he carried unmistakable traces of melancholy sadness and terrible pain, embedded like deep scars.

To Alice’s eyes, these traces were all too easy to spot.

Well, the misfortunes that Ash had faced unprepared were so cruel that anyone would have struggled to overcome them.

The scars etched into his fragile body didn’t seem to be fully covered by Sylvia’s love.

That fact made Alice feel deep compassion.

“That’s not it.”

Alice shook her head and said in a stiff, quiet voice.

It was both a statement to Sylvia and to herself.

No.

It can’t be.

I shouldn’t think like that.

As I said, I don’t have much time left.

I’m going to die soon.

“Liar.”

Sylvia snorted in response.

Thump.

Alice’s heart also seemed to mock her, shaking its head.

Alice clenched her teeth.

“Damn it.”

Yes,

Yes, this damn,

How could my heart not be moved?

Ash had become a much more impressive man than expected, they shared childhood memories, and his wounds from tragic events even stirred maternal instincts in her.

Above all, weren’t those tragic events connected to the intersection of memories she shared with Ash?

That was probably the biggest reason Alice had developed feelings for Ash.

Just as Alice was the only remnant of Ash’s past, Ash was the only remnant of Alice’s past.

Alice, who had gone mad with revenge after losing everything, even volunteering for the experiment to install this damned heart.

Perhaps it was natural for her to develop a strong attachment to Ash, the only precious person she had left.

No, it would be stranger if she didn’t.

Moreover, Ash had even been her fiancé!

I was first!

How could I not be shaken, how could I not feel wronged!

Thump.

“Hoo-ooo…”

Alice took a slow, deep breath, quiet enough that Sylvia couldn’t hear.

Stay calm.

Think coldly.

This is an illusion.

Just an illusion created by an overheated heart.

A false emotion created by this cursed heart that burns hot and fuels even hotter emotions.

“…Haah.”

Alice barely suppressed her racing heart and forced one corner of her mouth to curl up.

Then she spoke slowly, chewing and spitting out each word.

“Hah, you used to act like you had no interest in romance or love, but now you’ve become such a love expert that you can detect feelings just by looking at someone’s face?”

She tried to redirect her raging heart’s focus with hostile mockery toward Sylvia.

But that deliberately turned steering wheel instantly became a meaningless resistance with Sylvia’s single remark.

“Because I was like that.”

“…What?”

“Because I had exactly the same face as you do now.”

Oh, no.

Alice instantly felt her face burning up.

The heat starting from her chest, from her heart, traveled through her skin and muscles up to her face.

She felt a hot shame and embarrassment as if her brain was being cooked.

Alice shook her head vigorously in denial.

She had to deny it.

Otherwise, she felt she truly wouldn’t be able to stop.

“I don’t like Ash!”

That’s when it happened.

“…Mmm?”

“Damn it…!”

“Noona…?”

Ash’s voice, groggy with sleep, could be heard as he woke up.

Alice startled and looked up at Sylvia.

Sylvia was looking down at Alice with bright red, lewd eyes, as if looking down on her.

“…You.”

I really hate that woman.

Alice muttered inwardly.