Ch.159159. Broken Past (1)

“Finally… It’s finally over…!”

“Hueeeng, I really thought I was going to die…”

The kids were all crying and making a fuss.

Some were sitting down, while others were groaning from the sudden fatigue.

Seeing their reactions as the tension drained from their bodies would normally make me snicker, thinking “I was once like that too,” but…

Right now, I can’t afford to laugh.

Because I’ve realized that something is wrong with me.

I rubbed my shoulder with burst capillaries while retracing my memories.

‘So that sensation, that feeling wasn’t just my imagination.’

My shoulder took a strain while blocking Aris’s deliberately maximum output force.

Since my mana shield doesn’t break but instead transfers recoil to me when it encounters an unbearable level of force, the strain on my shoulder means I couldn’t withstand all of that output.

However, I should have been able to block all of that output originally.

‘If I couldn’t block this… does it mean I’m walking a similar path as back then?’

At some point, the power of my mana shield began to weaken.

I don’t know the exact cause. But if I had to guess… it was when I forcibly drew out mana.

I suspected it started weakening from that moment.

I had my suspicions, and it seemed to match up this time too.

The current cause must be that mana spear I threw at Shanbereshu during the Great Purge of Sheets.

“Sigh.”

With this single sigh, countless memories flashed through my mind.

Rather than good memories… there are more bad ones, of course. Since that day, I’ve only been going downhill.

But I can’t follow the same path this time.

-‘When you master a unique magic. Are there cases where you might lose it someday?’

I had already asked that question before. And the answer to that question was.

-‘Lose it? As far as I know, that doesn’t happen. It’s theoretically impossible.’

-‘Instead, there are cases where the essence of the power changes. These types are extremely rare. Because they don’t understand how their power has changed.’

Professor Denis had asserted confidently.

Not losing it, but a case where the essence of power changes.

Now I’ve directly encountered that situation, and only now can I ask about it again.

I have a reason to visit Professor Denis as soon as this matter is settled.

The awakening of unique magic… I’ll have to keep that in mind from now on too.

Let’s go back.

For now, checking my condition after returning is the top priority.

“Everyone, let’s go ba—”

“Why is the teacher suddenly acting like this?”

“I don’t know. He just suddenly…”

“He was using magic with really complex formulas earlier, maybe that’s why?”

“If it’s mana exhaustion, that could be it.”

Mana exhaustion? That’s impossible.

What Aris just used had a much weaker output than what was needed to save you all.

“Come here for a moment.”

I hadn’t noticed because of their whispering, but with all the kids gathered around, it was impossible not to see them.

But what’s strange is why this is happening.

“Hey, Aris. Why are you—”

“!!!”

To my surprise, as soon as my hand touched her, Aris trembled palely and backed away.

“Teacher…?”

“What’s wrong?”

I’m thinking the same thing as these kids.

‘What’s wrong with Aris?’

Her condition seems really off.

It’s understandable for them to show reactions of relief now that everything’s over, with tension draining away.

But that’s for these kids, not Aris.

This absolutely doesn’t apply to her, who has experienced countless battlefields and should be quite desensitized by now.

She’s not the type of woman who would curl up, hugging herself with both arms, and sit down helplessly.

‘Should I forcibly take her away?’

That seems right.

Although we’ve dealt with a group of Decurion-level magical beasts, this place could still be teeming with other magical beasts. It’s definitely not a safe zone. Especially since this is Sirah.

I lowered my posture, thinking I’d have to carry Aris on my back if necessary, but.

“Hey…! People are coming!!”

“Everyone, are you all okay?!”

Michelle’s voice was heard. There was no need for me to act anymore.

‘Well… I can leave the rest to Michelle.’

After giving Aris a couple of glances, I promptly left the place.

But as for why she showed such a reaction… I didn’t know well even afterward.

Not until I made contact with someone and recalled this incident again.

***

-Aris! What’s wrong? What happened that you can’t get up?

-Teacher!! Please say something, okay?

…

-This won’t do. She’s completely out of it. We need to lift her up and move her ourselves. Can you help?

-Yes!!

…

-What’s the situation? How did Aris end up like this…

-I don’t know. The students say she became like this right after the rescue…

…

Everything feels muffled.

Even when human voices reach my ears, I only feel the sound reverberating.

Everything is hazy.

Though my eyes are wide open, my vision is just blurry.

The same goes for other organs.

I’m not even sure if my nose and mouth are breathing, and I question whether my skin can even feel sensations.

It felt as if all my organs were paralyzed, with a sensation of sinking heavily somewhere.

Like being submerged in water.

That was probably when it happened.

When I closed my eyes.

…

……

………

-It’s quite comfortable, isn’t it? Don’t you think so, Aris Mackenheim?

Then, suddenly, I heard this voice.

“Who are you? Who’s calling my name?”

-Ahahat, you’re really funny. Beyond comfortable, you’re just shameless? Is that what’s important right now?

I don’t know who it is.

But somehow, it feels like there’s a sharp edge to it, as if hostility is clearly revealed.

-Why, are you trying to run away like that again this time?

“Ha, what do you mean by running away? From earlier, you’ve been saying I’m comfortable, shameless—what are you talking about?”

-Pfft, what am I talking about? You know very well, don’t you? What you’ve done.

The furrowed brow at the sneering voice was momentary.

Something with a human form approached right in front of her eyes. Judging by the hair, it’s a woman.

But like a shadow, everything is covered in darkness, so I don’t know who it is.

Soon, she snapped her fingers, and with that, fragments appeared as if something had been broken.

Those fragments began to vividly reflect some scene.

-How about it? Does this help you understand what I’m talking about?

“What are you…! What on earth…!”

What’s reflected in the fragment is a man who is also covered in shadows.

He’s rolling on the ground countless times, not minding becoming bloodied from colliding with his bare body.

I don’t know if it’s related to the claims of being comfortable, shameless, or running away.

“After spouting nonsense you know nothing about, why are you showing me this?”

-Really?

“…What?”

-You really don’t know? Even after seeing this?

Until now, I couldn’t remember anything.

But other fragments fly in and completely cover her vision.

In those fragments, all other Tembris members are visible, but one person is not.

…No, to be precise, it’s two people.

Including the viewer’s perspective.

-Do you understand now? This is all what you saw. Scenes you witnessed with your own two eyes.

“That’s impossible…”

-These are your memories. Your emotions. And you’re going to forget all of this?

Suddenly, all the gathered fragments shatter and disappear.

And one large fragment rises. It’s incomparably larger than the previous ones.

-Kuk…! Aris, listen to me…

-Shut up, you crazy bastard!!!!

“What… is this…”

The man in the fragment doesn’t have a single unharmed spot.

He’s covered with bruises and scars visible through his torn clothes here and there, and even fresh wounds.

His clothes were already in tatters, completely ragged.

But someone is unilaterally attacking this man, wielding magic.

Mercilessly blooming lotus flowers that I know all too well.

“No… no…”

Every time he opens his mouth, explosions continue.

He can’t even finish a single sentence. He keeps retreating without launching an attack.

-Senia will… be back soon. Charlotte is also healing that guy!

KWANG!

-Cough! I, told you. I never intended to abandon anyone!

KWANG!

-They’re, alive. Right now, because of the neutralization time…

KWAANG!!!

With a thudding sound, from that moment on, he completely collapsed.

Now the appearance of the man who had been covered in shadows began to show.

-Why, won’t you… believe me…

Junon, driven to the edge of a cliff, leaning against just one rock, said so.

That single sentence uttered with all his might, that single sentence barely uttered in a situation where his voice could hardly come out.

The moment it reached my ears, my head spun.

To the point where I wanted to tear my chest apart.

To the point where my hands and feet trembled.

He desperately claimed his innocence. It was probably more desperate than when he begged to save the kids trapped in the dome.

Eventually, the largest fragment shatters and sinks.

“I… did I really do such a thing…”

-Do you understand now?

All fragments have shattered.

And they converge at a single point in the brain, imprinting once again.

These are all memories of one person.

It was her past, where as always, her body acted first, committing acts and ruthlessly betraying the trust in her comrade.

Although they shattered right before her eyes, they are all embedded in Aris Mackenheim’s mind and will never disappear.

-Don’t try to forget anymore. You must never run away. Never.

And this voice too.

The face finally appears from the shadow that revealed its form.

It was undoubtedly her own image.

As her figure slowly drifts away, even though she wants to ask what this is, her voice no longer comes out.

With the sensation of sinking below the surface, the last sound that echoed in her ears was.

-Tick-tock.

The sound of a clock hand.

“Huh-uck, huh!”

My heart pounds as if it’s about to burst.

Repeatedly, exhalation and inhalation pass through my nose and mouth.

And tears that don’t stop.

This is not a sensation of being sucked into deep waters.

It’s a sensation only the vividly alive can feel.

This is reality.

Then was that just a dream?

No. I would vehemently deny it.

Those memories, which seem like they would play back without any filter if I just tried to recall them in my mind, were certainly not dreams.

“What… should I… do…?”

***

“I’ve finished the report…”

“Good job, Adel. You all worked hard too.”

“Whew, this year is exhausting.”

“Tell me about it. I’m even on the verge of graduation. I came to earn a little pocket money, and I don’t know what this is all about.”

For the inspectors assigned to Sirah, this incident was a natural disaster in itself.

Students who don’t learn properly.

Two factions split during the mid-term evaluation.

The absurd impulsive actions committed after defeat.

Recalling these would only reinforce the perception that Sirah is absolutely not a place to come to.

“Well, at least there were no casualties, so that’s fortunate.”

The most senior member stretches and optimistically remarks.

Others nod in agreement, saying it’s a blessing.

“That aside. Michelle, is your party member okay?”

“Come to think of it, I’m more worried about Aris. Even after talking to the kids, they all say they don’t know what happened.”

“…For now, she’s asleep in the infirmary. I’ll ask her directly when she wakes up.”

Surprisingly, what’s most concerning isn’t the students or the aftermath, but Aris.

The last image of her was that after rescuing the students, she suddenly grabbed her body and shed tears as if her soul had left her.

The doctor’s examination showed no physical abnormalities, which made it even more worrying.

“Michelle. Since you probably can’t teach today anyway, just go visit her in the hospital.”

“What? Then my report…”

“Isn’t this when you should get help from your seniors?”

“Having such a capable junior makes us look bad, you know.”

At this point, saving face as seniors is clearly just an excuse.

Michelle is certainly perceptive enough to see through this.

They’re making such excuses because they understand that as a fellow Tembris party member, her mind must be the most troubled, and they’re being considerate.

“Go quickly. And Adel, you too.”

“Me too?”

“You have a classmate who was there. He worked hard too, so go check on his condition.”

In reality, Junon’s physical condition isn’t that bad.

This was just to drive the point home. The senior students weren’t senior for nothing.

Winking at Adel as a signal, the seniors piled on plausible words to send the two juniors off to rest well.

After bowing their heads, the two expressed their gratitude and left.

Adel, not lacking in perception either, stepped aside to allow Michelle to comfortably visit Aris in the hospital.

“Aris, are you awake?”

There was no response from the infirmary.

“I need to check your condition, so I’m coming in.”

However, Michelle, who was about to turn the doorknob, discovered something.

“Why are the slippers here…?”

Inside the infirmary, slippers that are only worn in the hospital were sticking out.

‘No way.’

An ominous feeling crept in.

She immediately flung the door open, and the ominous feeling was confirmed.

The bed was empty.

“Aris!!”

It was the moment it was confirmed that Aris had woken up and gone somewhere from the infirmary.