Ch.157Qualification (3)

*

Click.

The dry, cracking sound of metal pieces locking together struck my ears.

Sylvia and I were trying on the armor that Alice had brought for our adventure tomorrow.

Sylvia seemed already accustomed to it, skillfully tightening the leather straps between her waist and armpits with practiced hands.

In contrast, I was struggling just to position the armor properly on my body, to the point where Alice had to help me put it on.

She told me to raise both arms out to the sides, then firmly tightened the straps between my armpits, yanking them hard before slowly stepping back.

Sylvia, having finished her adjustments, stood behind Alice, staring blankly at me in my armor.

“It suits you better than I expected.”

“No, how can you say that? To me, he looks like a child playing knight.”

Sylvia and Alice each offered their impressions as they looked at me standing awkwardly.

Alice’s assessment was probably closer to the objective truth.

Of course, there was no mirror, but I didn’t need one to know that the armor didn’t suit me at all.

From the start, it made my entire body wobble just wearing it—there was no way it could look good on me.

“Ash, try moving around. Is there anywhere that feels restricted or painfully tight?”

“It’s actually better to wear armor slightly loose than too tight. If it’s too fitted and the armor gets dented, the metal plate will stab right into your skin.”

The two of them bombarded me with questions and knowledge.

Given that this advice was coming from a hero and an inquisitor directly under the Pope, I should have been paying close attention. Yet despite this luxury, my ears weren’t registering any of their words.

“…It’s, it’s heavy.”

Wearing armor for the first time in my life was heavier and more suffocating than I had imagined.

It felt like carrying bags full of sand strapped to both my front and back.

With the heavy metal pieces resting on my chest and back, secured by leather straps at the armpits and waist, my back was forced straight, causing my upper body to sway back and forth whenever I shifted my center of gravity.

“Sis, I don’t think I can do this.”

“No, you have to wear it.”

“You’ll get used to the weight soon enough. Just bear with it a little longer.”

The two people who usually bickered and disagreed happened to be on the same side this time.

If these two were in agreement, they were probably right, but I couldn’t imagine running around in this like I did during training. I tried to protest in a small voice.

“B-but, I’m a mage and spirit user. I won’t be fighting on the front lines, so do I really need armor? It seems like it would just hinder my movement…”

Before I could finish, both of them opened their mouths simultaneously.

“Even if you’re in the rear, cloth or leather armor would leave you in constant danger of death on a journey as perilous as this.”

“Besides, we can’t let Ash wander alone, so the distance between the vanguard and Ash won’t be that great anyway,”

“And since we’re only three people, not a large group, we can’t always protect Ash,”

“Even Maria from that large hero party wore armor.”

Their back-and-forth rhythm was like a round song, and overwhelmed by their coordination, I could only nod weakly in agreement.

I suppose these two, who had learned through experience how even the smallest overlooked detail could lead to death, would naturally emphasize safety even if it meant some discomfort.

Especially for me, who was far more fragile than either of them.

I remembered reading somewhere that the greatest threat when treading dangerous paths wasn’t powerful enemies but complacency.

These two had learned that lesson not from reading but from experience.

I sighed and slowly tried to adjust my center of gravity and find my balance.

Alice watched me and said quietly:

“Like Sylvia said, you’ll get used to it with time. Since you’ll rarely take it off during the journey, I recommend sleeping in it tonight too. There’s a lot more to get used to with armor than just the weight.”

“I’m newly impressed by you and Sylvia.”

“Hah…”

Sylvia approached with her cheeks puffed out and ruffled my hair roughly.

“What do you mean ‘newly’? I was, after all, the strongest person in this country.”

“And I was the strongest person in the Goddess Church until recently.”

“…”

Huh.

That’s right.

This kingdom and the Goddess Church.

No, in this world rushing toward destruction, these two might be the strongest people left alive.

Suddenly, the dignified bearing of the two women standing before me seemed truly magnificent.

Perhaps it was because they moved so naturally in their armor, making them look unfamiliar to me.

Though I knew it intellectually, it somehow didn’t feel real.

“…”

The weight of the armor pressed down on my shoulders even more heavily.

My legs nearly buckled under the unbearable pressure.

Humanity’s last chance to cut off the breath of the Demon King, who had hideously survived and was attempting to recover.

Only three people had embarked on this journey.

Sylvia. Alice.

And me.

“…Phew.”

There were no orders from the kingdom.

No blessing from the church.

Without support from any nobles or guilds, this was humanity’s last desperate struggle against imminent extinction.

The key to overcoming this dire situation was just two powerful individuals entangled in the threads of fate and duty, plus one fool who had encouraged them.

Just as I knew how extraordinary Sylvia and Alice were but was newly struck by it,

I realized once again the significance of the journey before me.

Honestly, I felt like I might collapse.

The weight of responsibility pressed down on me, far heavier than the armor itself.

I gritted my teeth and planted my feet firmly on the ground.

“…Alright. This isn’t the time to be complaining… I guess I wasn’t taking this seriously enough.”

“Ash…”

“If I can’t even bear the weight of armor, then I won’t be able to endure this journey. That’s why you and Sylvia tried to dissuade me…”

“…Yes, that’s right.”

“I honestly didn’t know. I vaguely thought I could do it, but now that the moment to actually do it has come, I suddenly feel the weight of the destiny I’ve shouldered. Of course, what I’m experiencing now is probably just a fragment of that weight…”

Alice and Sylvia didn’t respond.

I slowly straightened my back and looked at them.

Without Sylvia’s training, I probably wouldn’t even have been able to stand up in this armor.

Alice must have known that too, which is why she arranged time for me to train.

“It’s just a fragment, but… it’s heavy.”

Sylvia had to face the deaths of her comrades and her own failure.

Alice was living with her own death looming before her like a ticking time bomb.

From the beginning, when they showed reluctance at my naive suggestion to go after the Demon King, until now, this very moment.

The two of them had been facing the situation much more seriously than I had.

‘The spirits love Ash. Alice and Sylvia love Ash too,’

Pia’s recent words echoed in my ears.

Pia told me I deserved to be happy.

Despite all my mistakes and wrongdoings, because there were people who loved me.

Because there were people who wanted me to be happy, she said I deserved happiness.

‘No.’

I denied Pia’s words in my heart.

Not because I wanted to fall back into the swamp of despair and self-destructive thoughts.

Because people loved me beyond what I deserved, I had vowed to stop degrading myself and move toward true atonement and salvation.

But it wasn’t about deserving.

Worthiness isn’t given—it’s earned.

Helping these two warriors who had indulged my stubborn insistence, killing the Demon King, and bringing peace to humanity.

That was the worthiness I needed to earn.

I closed my eyes tightly and clenched my fists.

“Since I encouraged Alice and Sylvia, I should take responsibility.”

“…Ash.”

“…”

The expressions on their faces were somewhat peculiar.

A mix of slight shock, lamentation, and concern.

Alice reached out to me as if she had something to say, but Sylvia raised her arm to stop her.

Then, after studying me quietly for a moment, she curled one corner of her mouth into a grin.

“That’s cool.”

“…Sylvia, I’m being serious.”

“I know, and I meant it sincerely.”

“…”

Sylvia approached and lightly placed her arm on my right shoulder.

Though it seemed like a gentle gesture, whether due to the weight of her metal gauntlet or her strength, it felt like a massive boulder had fallen on my shoulder.

My right knee almost buckled, but I straightened my leg as much as possible to endure it.

With no technique for focusing strength only in my legs, I tensed my entire body, causing my shoulders to tremble.

Sylvia watched me and slowly said:

“It’s cool, but that’s not enough.”

“…Huh?”

“Ash, I can tell what state you’re in just by looking at your expression now.”

Sylvia said something similar to what Pia had said.

Was I really that transparent with my emotions?

“You seem to be thinking something strange again, probably arming yourself with a sense of responsibility or duty or something like that.”

Sylvia hit the nail on the head with her casual tone.

I turned with bewildered eyes, and Alice nodded, looking at me as she spoke:

“I’ve seen that face many times. The expression of someone steeling their resolve before a great task.”

“Honestly, it’s quite impressive. It’s a manly expression.”

Sylvia looked at me with piercing eyes despite her slight smile.

Her gaze seemed to easily penetrate my shallow thoughts.

Apparently, my intentions were transparent to these two experienced individuals.

Sylvia slowly opened her mouth:

“But Ash, in my experience, people with that kind of face usually end up dead.”

“…!”

“They face their magnificent, cool end with dignity, but death is still death.”

“…”

“And I cannot accept any situation where you die.”

Alice chimed in:

“This is already dangerous enough without you having such a risky mindset.”

“What, I can’t even control my own attitude? After I’ve made up my mind…”

Sylvia cut me off coldly and firmly:

“That’s the problem.”

“…Huh?”

“When you’re determined, you don’t care about death. Don’t I know you?”

“…”

“That’s not courage. It’s thinking that it’s okay if you die.”

“…No, it’s not like I want to—”

“If a dangerous situation arises, or if there’s a chance to save Alice, you’d be willing to die, wouldn’t you, Ash?”

I closed my mouth, speechless at Sylvia’s sudden statement.

Not because her words were too blunt, but because she was right.

If during our journey there was an opportunity to save them through my sacrifice, I would readily throw my body away.

Not simply because I cherished them.

But because strategically, it would be far better for the journey if they survived instead of me.

“…Sylvia.”

Alice frowned at Sylvia’s aggressive statement.

Sylvia glanced at her briefly, shook her head slightly, and turned her gaze back to me.

It seemed Sylvia was also aware of Alice’s physical condition.

“Neither I, nor Alice, want that. Right?”

“…Of course not.”

Alice’s casual response made me suddenly angry.

No, you’re dying right now.

You could die tomorrow, and yet you say such things?

I pushed away Sylvia’s arm and said:

“Then what am I supposed to do?”

“…”

“I know. Honestly, I know I’m just a burden… But I also know I have a role to play. I know I have a part in this destiny, and if that role is to be a sacrifice…”

“Ash…”

“Even if that role is to be a sacrifice… I’m willing to do it.”

“We don’t want—”

“I know! I know how hard you both try for me. How much you care about me! But what about me? I care about you both too. I love Sylvia, and Alice is precious to me. If I can’t die, what about you two? If Sylvia dies, if Alice dies, do you think I’d be happy?”

“…I’m sorry, Ash. That’s not what I meant.”

“What do you mean it’s not?!”

When I shouted, Sylvia stepped back hesitantly.

Suddenly, a powerful emotion began to surge from the back of my head.

That emotion came like a tidal wave and gathered in my eyes, slowly forming into dewdrops that began to fall.

It was a sadness close to resentment.

I felt miserable.

I understood why they wanted to protect me.

It wasn’t unpleasant to be treated as precious.

The problem was that I was too weak.

So weak that my life was inevitably in danger, that I needed protection,

And the problem was that for someone as weak as me, the only way to show resolve, the only way I could help on this journey, seemed to be sacrificing myself for them.

Of course, I didn’t want to die.

If I could overcome even such dangers by combining forces with Pia and complete the journey, I would gladly do so.

However, we were walking into the throat of the Demon King, weakened though he might be.

Without that level of resolve, I couldn’t overcome the weight pressing down on me.

Yet these two were telling me not to even have such resolve.

Because they feared I might die.

“Ash, listen carefully.”

Sylvia took off her gauntlets and gently cupped both my cheeks.

She wiped away the tears gathered at the corners of my eyes with her thumbs, and as she slowly examined my face, her expression was filled with dismay.

“That’s not what I meant. But I’m sorry. I honestly didn’t think about how you were feeling.”

“…Ugh,”

“Of course. Of course you’d be sad if I died, that’s only natural…”

A faint smile gradually spread across Sylvia’s face, slowly transforming into a broken sort of grin.

It was like she was trying to hold back laughter but failing.

After struggling briefly to compose her expression, Sylvia quickly gave up, slowly removed her hands from my cheeks, and slipped her arms behind them.

Then she suddenly hugged my neck and said:

“I should apologize for making you feel bad, but I’m so happy that Ash… said he loves me, that he wouldn’t be happy if I died…”

“…Sylvia.”

“Wait, I can’t stop smiling.”

I was about to say this wasn’t the time for such things, but I closed my mouth.

Behind Sylvia’s back, I could see Alice glaring at us both.

Alice’s face was contorted with intense irritation, along with a disbelieving half-laugh.

I patted Sylvia’s back, signaling her to let go quickly.

.